Sudafed Cheese?
July 7, 2019 6:29 PM Subscribe
I took a Sudafed tonight (b/c weather --> sinuses), and Micro McGee is absolutely convinced that he's only ever heard the word "sudafed" when describing an alleged "sudafed cheese." He insists there is a "sudafed cheese." I said he must have misheard and he said WELL WHAT WAS IT THEN? So, MetaFilter -- what was it, then?
I immediately suggested gouda. He said it was not gouda. ("Gouda ... red ... cheese?" "MOM.")
I immediately suggested gouda. He said it was not gouda. ("Gouda ... red ... cheese?" "MOM.")
Port Salut used in a sentence, perhaps?
posted by phunniemee at 6:52 PM on July 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by phunniemee at 6:52 PM on July 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
Has anyone in his orbit mentioned sous vide cheese?
posted by nantucket at 6:58 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by nantucket at 6:58 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
Depending on who Micro McGee has been hanging out with there was a drug that was popular about 10 years ago named Cheese, which was heroin mixed with OTC cold remedies.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:59 PM on July 7, 2019 [21 favorites]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:59 PM on July 7, 2019 [21 favorites]
It's slightly more doubtful about what he heard, but maybe grass-fed beef?
posted by Wobbuffet at 7:06 PM on July 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by Wobbuffet at 7:06 PM on July 7, 2019 [1 favorite]
Asking the obvious:
Have you asked him who has spoken to him about "Sudafed cheese"?
If he gives you a shrug and "I dunno, but I know people have said it" then you're out of luck, but maybe he'll dredge up a movie or a book or a song reference that will make it easier to figure out what he mis-heard. Or maybe you'll discover that "sudafed cheese" is itself a transposition of something completely different (my younger brother once drove us all mad insisting that he'd recently heard an album by "Paul McCartney's brother", and then finally said something like "it was called something like 'Va-lowtey', I think," and that's how I realized he was talking about Valotte, and had managed to get both the relevant Beatle and the relevant familial relationship wrong).
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:15 PM on July 7, 2019 [7 favorites]
Have you asked him who has spoken to him about "Sudafed cheese"?
If he gives you a shrug and "I dunno, but I know people have said it" then you're out of luck, but maybe he'll dredge up a movie or a book or a song reference that will make it easier to figure out what he mis-heard. Or maybe you'll discover that "sudafed cheese" is itself a transposition of something completely different (my younger brother once drove us all mad insisting that he'd recently heard an album by "Paul McCartney's brother", and then finally said something like "it was called something like 'Va-lowtey', I think," and that's how I realized he was talking about Valotte, and had managed to get both the relevant Beatle and the relevant familial relationship wrong).
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:15 PM on July 7, 2019 [7 favorites]
Cheese (recreational drug)
Doesn't actually contain sudafed. That's meth.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:31 PM on July 7, 2019
Doesn't actually contain sudafed. That's meth.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:31 PM on July 7, 2019
Could he have heard someone say “Sudafed PE” out loud?
posted by brook horse at 7:58 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by brook horse at 7:58 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
Could it have been "head cheese" plus some word right before that?
posted by needs more cowbell at 8:07 PM on July 7, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by needs more cowbell at 8:07 PM on July 7, 2019 [3 favorites]
Yes, I was just imagining someone saying “some sort of head cheese”
posted by ejs at 8:08 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by ejs at 8:08 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
I'm with Lyn Never that it's probably a reference to the recreational drug that was a mix of heroin and cold medication. It wasn't usually Sudafed, I understand, but things like Tylenol PM or Benadryl - which is close enough that I can see it getting mixed up. There's a standup bit by Kumail Nanjiani that's been popular online for years, and I wouldn't be surprised if retellings or misrememberings of that is behind it.
posted by northernish at 8:26 PM on July 7, 2019
posted by northernish at 8:26 PM on July 7, 2019
Response by poster: He just turned 8 and he'd never heard of marijuana before this week when we were talking about pending legalization later this year, so I'm thinking not heroin-spiked meth or anything like that. (He has no filters so he always tells us the latest scandalous info from school and camp, which right now is 100% jokes about butts and farts, and campfire stories about the man with the hook stalking the teenagers in the car.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:44 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:44 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
Is it possible that he heard, cheese souffle?
posted by jennstra at 8:56 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by jennstra at 8:56 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
Go to bed please?
posted by lazuli at 9:06 PM on July 7, 2019 [6 favorites]
posted by lazuli at 9:06 PM on July 7, 2019 [6 favorites]
There was a dip my mom made in the late 60s/early 70s out of cream cheese, capers and something that made it orange in color (possibly paprika). It probably came from a magazine that had those horrifying party food recipes that were so popular, like jellied beef molds and hot Dr. Pepper.
I have been wracking my brain for years trying to remember the name so I could find the recipe. It was (three syllable word starting with S) - cheese.
When I saw "Sudafed cheese" I immediately thought of it.
Has Micro interacted with people old enough to have entertained in the 70s, or with hipsters who ironically make old recipes from that era?
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 9:11 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
I have been wracking my brain for years trying to remember the name so I could find the recipe. It was (three syllable word starting with S) - cheese.
When I saw "Sudafed cheese" I immediately thought of it.
Has Micro interacted with people old enough to have entertained in the 70s, or with hipsters who ironically make old recipes from that era?
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 9:11 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
Also a friend has a five-year-old who just started attending a Christian church and has started saying, "That is not very Cheese-like!" to indicate non-Jesus-like behavior. Any potential Jesus reference?
posted by lazuli at 9:11 PM on July 7, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by lazuli at 9:11 PM on July 7, 2019 [4 favorites]
Disregard my answer, I just tracked down what I was thinking of, and it's called Liptauer Cheese, not S-something cheese.
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 9:16 PM on July 7, 2019
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 9:16 PM on July 7, 2019
Now I’m wondering if maybe this is Micro’s misremembering of feta cheese?
posted by miles1972 at 9:18 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
posted by miles1972 at 9:18 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
Pseudo-cheese? (Like for vegans?)
posted by stowaway at 9:19 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
posted by stowaway at 9:19 PM on July 7, 2019 [12 favorites]
My thought also (like, Velveeta?)
(although probably a little too sophisticated for an 8-year-old)
posted by Rash at 9:31 PM on July 7, 2019
(although probably a little too sophisticated for an 8-year-old)
posted by Rash at 9:31 PM on July 7, 2019
Shredded cheese?
posted by ellenaim at 10:12 PM on July 7, 2019 [4 favorites]
posted by ellenaim at 10:12 PM on July 7, 2019 [4 favorites]
Another vote for Feta cheese.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 11:03 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 11:03 PM on July 7, 2019 [2 favorites]
Pseudo-feta cheese
super fetid cheese
posted by Iris Gambol at 11:35 PM on July 7, 2019 [5 favorites]
super fetid cheese
posted by Iris Gambol at 11:35 PM on July 7, 2019 [5 favorites]
Here’s a list to try, but I didn’t see anything likely on a first glance.
There’s a lot of cheese in the world.
posted by nat at 11:53 PM on July 7, 2019
There’s a lot of cheese in the world.
posted by nat at 11:53 PM on July 7, 2019
Is he a baseball fan? Cheese is a good fastball. Maybe an announcer said something sounded like Sudafed? Hopefully he is a Southside fan.
posted by AugustWest at 12:04 AM on July 8, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by AugustWest at 12:04 AM on July 8, 2019 [2 favorites]
It's possible that in your stuffy-nosed, allergy-ridden state, you asked for someone in the household to bring you medicine by saying, "Sudafed, please!" BUT because of your condition, all your kiddo heard was "Sudafed, cheese!" (I just tested this theory by plugging my nose and saying it softly out loud; it holds up. Unfortunately, I still managed to wake up Mr. Wasp who is peacefully snoozing beside me. He said sleepily, "Why are you whispering?" And I said, "I'm just doing an experiment for MetaFilter." He patted my leg and immediately fell back asleep.)
posted by WaspEnterprises at 12:54 AM on July 8, 2019 [31 favorites]
posted by WaspEnterprises at 12:54 AM on July 8, 2019 [31 favorites]
Nthing “Feta cheese”
posted by Kriesa at 3:24 AM on July 8, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by Kriesa at 3:24 AM on July 8, 2019 [2 favorites]
I’m with shredded. Seems like shredded and sudafed could jumble up a false match in a kid’s head.
Or maybe shredded + gouda + feta just causing cheese associations to come together.
posted by umbú at 4:55 AM on July 8, 2019
Or maybe shredded + gouda + feta just causing cheese associations to come together.
posted by umbú at 4:55 AM on July 8, 2019
Response by poster: Well I read these off to him this morning to much family hilarity, and he insists it's none of these, so we're still stumped, but now we're coming up with hilarious imaginary cheese names.
He does insist it is NOT FETA which is one of his top three favorite cheeses so he wouldn't have confused it for sudafed cheese.
(I think shredded is a likely suspect too.)
"Hopefully he is a Southside fan."
We have been Northside fans in this family since 1893 so NO HE IS NOT.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 4:56 AM on July 8, 2019 [5 favorites]
He does insist it is NOT FETA which is one of his top three favorite cheeses so he wouldn't have confused it for sudafed cheese.
(I think shredded is a likely suspect too.)
"Hopefully he is a Southside fan."
We have been Northside fans in this family since 1893 so NO HE IS NOT.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 4:56 AM on July 8, 2019 [5 favorites]
Combining a couple of suggestions: “sous vide head” sounds pretty similar to Sudafed, so maybe sous vide head cheese. Google suggests at least a few people have made it.
posted by jedicus at 5:59 AM on July 8, 2019
posted by jedicus at 5:59 AM on July 8, 2019
We got burgers and should've had cheese.
posted by flabdablet at 6:48 AM on July 8, 2019 [5 favorites]
posted by flabdablet at 6:48 AM on July 8, 2019 [5 favorites]
Is / was he a fan of the film Ratatouille? They mention "mimolette cheese" and "not just any cheese, but tomme de chèvre de pays"
posted by Mchelly at 6:50 AM on July 8, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by Mchelly at 6:50 AM on July 8, 2019 [1 favorite]
He does insist it is NOT FETA which is one of his top three favorite cheeses so he wouldn't have confused it for sudafed cheese.
To be fair, they're pretty similar.
posted by flabdablet at 7:01 AM on July 8, 2019
To be fair, they're pretty similar.
posted by flabdablet at 7:01 AM on July 8, 2019
If we've reached the stage of free association,
Fake Government Cheese > Pseudo Fed Cheese
posted by zamboni at 9:21 AM on July 8, 2019 [1 favorite]
Fake Government Cheese > Pseudo Fed Cheese
posted by zamboni at 9:21 AM on July 8, 2019 [1 favorite]
Pseudo feta cheese, then!
posted by Occula at 9:35 AM on July 8, 2019 [3 favorites]
posted by Occula at 9:35 AM on July 8, 2019 [3 favorites]
Mishearing poutine?
posted by A Terrible Llama at 4:25 PM on July 8, 2019
posted by A Terrible Llama at 4:25 PM on July 8, 2019
“Sue the Feds, please”?
posted by MexicanYenta at 3:54 AM on July 9, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by MexicanYenta at 3:54 AM on July 9, 2019 [2 favorites]
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by zamboni at 6:52 PM on July 7, 2019 [7 favorites]