Enlighten me, Midwesterners!
February 20, 2019 11:53 PM Subscribe
A friend is having a cheese ball and poker party. Each guest must bring a cheese ball to be admitted, and I have never tasted one. Please help me make the most delicious/interesting vegetarian or pescatarian cheese ball imaginable.
Lotta cheese ball novices going; it’s going to be a real amateur (ball) hour up in there and I’d like to set myself apart from the crowd. The fate of our evening teeters precariously upon the precipice of your recommendations.
Lotta cheese ball novices going; it’s going to be a real amateur (ball) hour up in there and I’d like to set myself apart from the crowd. The fate of our evening teeters precariously upon the precipice of your recommendations.
I don’t have a recipe exactly, but I make a cheese spread that could probably be made into a ball. Soften a stick of butter and a block of cream cheese.
Then add:
Brown mustard
Worcestershire sauce
Liquid smoke (I use hickory flavored)
Then add whatever spices appeal to you. I usually use garlic powder and onion powder. Sometimes I’ll add oregano or basil or parsley, sometimes I just stop after garlic and onion. Either way, it comes out good.
I mix it all with a stick blender or mixer, and I put it in the fridge in a bowl to solidify, but I’m sure you could roll it into a ball and coat it in smoked almonds or something. It’s always a hit.
posted by MexicanYenta at 3:31 AM on February 21, 2019
Then add:
Brown mustard
Worcestershire sauce
Liquid smoke (I use hickory flavored)
Then add whatever spices appeal to you. I usually use garlic powder and onion powder. Sometimes I’ll add oregano or basil or parsley, sometimes I just stop after garlic and onion. Either way, it comes out good.
I mix it all with a stick blender or mixer, and I put it in the fridge in a bowl to solidify, but I’m sure you could roll it into a ball and coat it in smoked almonds or something. It’s always a hit.
posted by MexicanYenta at 3:31 AM on February 21, 2019
You want the Bacon Ranch Beer Cheeseball. It's colorful, lots of flavor with green onions and pimento, and crusted with pretzels. Allow 24 hours to set up in the fridge.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:50 AM on February 21, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:50 AM on February 21, 2019 [2 favorites]
You should make a cheese ball hedgehog!. I am apparently truly a Midwesterner now, because I made one recently, and it was super cute. I found the video on this page helpful for getting the shape right.
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 5:21 AM on February 21, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by ArbitraryAndCapricious at 5:21 AM on February 21, 2019 [2 favorites]
A basic cheese ball is sharp cheese and softened cream cheese, plus spices. I like sharp white cheddar 2:0.5 with gruyère, chopped walnuts, a dash of dry white wine, cayenne, very finely minced white onion, garlic powder, squirt of lemon, and some basil. You could also do a multiball plate with a variety.
Personally, I prefer to use a decorative Jell-O mold to get a shape other than "ball" but if you are already not a cheese ball person I'm guessing you're not also a Jell-O salad person. A ball is fine. You can stud it with olives.
You can do something similar with just cream cheese with confectioner's sugar, vanilla, and cinnamon mixed in. It's basically dense cream cheese frosting, but it's unlikely anyone else will show up with Dessert Cheeseball.
posted by blnkfrnk at 5:52 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
Personally, I prefer to use a decorative Jell-O mold to get a shape other than "ball" but if you are already not a cheese ball person I'm guessing you're not also a Jell-O salad person. A ball is fine. You can stud it with olives.
You can do something similar with just cream cheese with confectioner's sugar, vanilla, and cinnamon mixed in. It's basically dense cream cheese frosting, but it's unlikely anyone else will show up with Dessert Cheeseball.
posted by blnkfrnk at 5:52 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
Classic mid-century recipe: Party Cheese Ball from the very entertaining Mid-Century Menu blog. Recipe review: "It’s recommended that you use two hands when eating Party Cheese Ball. It shovels in faster that way."
Or, how about a dessert cheese ball? Raspberry Cheese Ball
[Full disclosure: not a mid-westerner, but they ate a lot of cheese balls in the 1950s and I love mid-century food blogs and the classic Joy of Cooking and everyone needs a solid cheese recipe or seven for Shavuot]
posted by carrioncomfort at 6:06 AM on February 21, 2019
Or, how about a dessert cheese ball? Raspberry Cheese Ball
[Full disclosure: not a mid-westerner, but they ate a lot of cheese balls in the 1950s and I love mid-century food blogs and the classic Joy of Cooking and everyone needs a solid cheese recipe or seven for Shavuot]
posted by carrioncomfort at 6:06 AM on February 21, 2019
I recently made this Bacon Jalapeno Cheese ball (sans the pecans, because they seemed weird and unnecessary), and it was delicious. It's sorta like a jalapeno popper, in cheeseball form, with bacon. If anything, I would make more bacon than you think you need for the encrustening, because mine ended up a bit skimpy, even trying to accommodate for the no pecans.
posted by Fig at 6:47 AM on February 21, 2019
posted by Fig at 6:47 AM on February 21, 2019
This one, with curry and chutney and rolled in almonds, never ceases to be a huge hit whenever I make it. It goes best with Wheat Thins, of all things.
posted by cooker girl at 6:55 AM on February 21, 2019
posted by cooker girl at 6:55 AM on February 21, 2019
Best answer: My friend, you need the cheese ring from Tea-Time At The Masters, as compiled by the Junior League of Augusta, Georgia.
The real recipe is at my mom's house in her well-aged copy of that cookbook but I have found a couple online links that I'm pretty sure are the same one based on my recollection of how it is made:
https://www.cooks.com/recipe/yt0lu86y/now-famous-cheese-ring.html
https://www.lanascooking.com/cheddar-pecan-cheese-ring-with-strawberry-preserves/
Yes, it sounds like a bizarre combo. But I assure you it is absolutely delicious. Mold into a ring and in the center, put a small dish of good strawberry preserves. Proper way to eat is to put the cheese on the cracker and then top with a dollop of strawberry.
It is important that the onion be grated fine - run it through a food processor - you don't want crunchy pieces of onion so much as sort of onion mush that will permeate the ring with tangy flavor to blend with the sharp cheese, toasty nuts, little flash of heat from the hot sauce or cayenne, and sweet preserves.
Pecans are best (you want them toasted and crunchy) but if you can't get them where you live it is possible to substitute walnuts.
For added class use homemade preserves.
Man. Now I want some cheese ring.
posted by oblique red at 7:27 AM on February 21, 2019 [7 favorites]
The real recipe is at my mom's house in her well-aged copy of that cookbook but I have found a couple online links that I'm pretty sure are the same one based on my recollection of how it is made:
https://www.cooks.com/recipe/yt0lu86y/now-famous-cheese-ring.html
https://www.lanascooking.com/cheddar-pecan-cheese-ring-with-strawberry-preserves/
Yes, it sounds like a bizarre combo. But I assure you it is absolutely delicious. Mold into a ring and in the center, put a small dish of good strawberry preserves. Proper way to eat is to put the cheese on the cracker and then top with a dollop of strawberry.
It is important that the onion be grated fine - run it through a food processor - you don't want crunchy pieces of onion so much as sort of onion mush that will permeate the ring with tangy flavor to blend with the sharp cheese, toasty nuts, little flash of heat from the hot sauce or cayenne, and sweet preserves.
Pecans are best (you want them toasted and crunchy) but if you can't get them where you live it is possible to substitute walnuts.
For added class use homemade preserves.
Man. Now I want some cheese ring.
posted by oblique red at 7:27 AM on February 21, 2019 [7 favorites]
I came here to suggest the exact same one as Oblique Red did above. It's wacky but amazing and always gets devoured.
posted by pointystick at 8:49 AM on February 21, 2019
posted by pointystick at 8:49 AM on February 21, 2019
If you can't decide which of the above recipes to use (I don't envy you), make a variety of cheeseballs, roll them up small, like meatball size, and serve with pretzel sticks stuck in them like toothpicks.
posted by sarajane at 8:50 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by sarajane at 8:50 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
four words, friend: red wine cheese ball.
posted by wellifyouinsist at 8:59 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by wellifyouinsist at 8:59 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Goshdarn it. I promise that previously did not show up when I did searched- the hazards of disagreement on cheeseball vs. cheese ball terminology.
posted by charmedimsure at 10:04 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by charmedimsure at 10:04 AM on February 21, 2019 [1 favorite]
My mom used to shape her cheese ball into the shape of an owl and stud the outside with almond "feathers" if you are of a crafty bent!
posted by stompadour at 4:09 PM on February 21, 2019
posted by stompadour at 4:09 PM on February 21, 2019
Response by poster: Thanks for your advice! Used the second recipe oblique red suggested and it was the most popular cheese production there. It was majestic and I liked it more than I thought I might given the tremendous amount of mayonnaise it contained.
Personally, I prefer to use a decorative Jell-O mold to get a shape other than "ball" but if you are already not a cheese ball person I'm guessing you're not also a Jell-O salad person.
Never has a truer sentence been written, blnkfrnk. I did, though, get to have a fun conversation and Jell-O show and tell with the host who when she got first choice of her grandmother’s things chose the molds and had to do some work to mend the resultant rift with her sister.
posted by charmedimsure at 12:16 AM on February 23, 2019 [1 favorite]
Personally, I prefer to use a decorative Jell-O mold to get a shape other than "ball" but if you are already not a cheese ball person I'm guessing you're not also a Jell-O salad person.
Never has a truer sentence been written, blnkfrnk. I did, though, get to have a fun conversation and Jell-O show and tell with the host who when she got first choice of her grandmother’s things chose the molds and had to do some work to mend the resultant rift with her sister.
posted by charmedimsure at 12:16 AM on February 23, 2019 [1 favorite]
« Older Moving past needing an apology from someone who... | I want to propose to my boyfriend! Should I? Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by Mizu at 12:42 AM on February 21, 2019