Requested: Cover Letter Input
January 13, 2019 5:41 PM   Subscribe

Hello out there, MetaFilter! I'm currently updating my cover letter to reflect some freelance work I've picked up recently. Does the below paragraph make sense/work?

Here's the paragraph! Hopefully it's self-explanatory. Any input is appreciated. Thank you so much!
--

As a professional writer, editor, and content strategist of over a decade, I hold extensive experience in setting and executing strategic goals to develop compelling, on-brand marketing deliverables. In my current role as brief editor at , a prominent digital publishing company, I help shape strategy and branding by drafting clear, concise communications to guide editorial illustrators. Translating overarching content themes and ideas into succinct business communiques, I manage simultaneous deadlines and collaborate with editors to ensure the timely delivery of assets.
posted by shelle to Writing & Language (8 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
Reads clunky, odd first use "of" maybe meant "for"? "Hold" experience not "have"?

"Translating overarching content themes and ideas into succinct business communiques, I manage simultaneous deadlines and collaborate with editors to ensure the timely delivery of assets." seems over thought or over loaded with adjectives.
posted by Freedomboy at 5:59 PM on January 13, 2019 [3 favorites]


That paragraph is comprised of three very long, dense sentences. It was hard to remember how a sentence began when it ended.
posted by mermaidcafe at 6:42 PM on January 13, 2019 [3 favorites]


Too generic and reads like your resume. A cover letter should describe why you personally are best for the job. Check out the Ask a Manager archives at AskAManager.org!
posted by masquesoporfavor at 6:47 PM on January 13, 2019 [6 favorites]


I think the active voice can work well in cover letters:
For over a decade, I have developed compelling, on-brand marketing as a professional writer, editor, and content strategist. In my current role, I draft clear and concise guidance for editorial illustrators, and I manage simultaneous deadlines while collaborating with editors to ensure timely delivery.
posted by Little Dawn at 8:32 PM on January 13, 2019 [6 favorites]


Response by poster: Thank you so much! Great tip about AskAManager. I've rewritten the paragraph in the vein of the advice on that site:

I thrive on shaping brands—as writer, editor, and strategist, I have ample experience forming and carrying out strategic goals in the service of compelling, on-brand creative assets. In my current role as content brief editor at Company, a digital publisher, I write concise communications to clearly guide the artists who illustrate the company’s diverse editorial content. Skillfully summarizing practical concerns and overall brand vision, I work closely with editors to ensure the timely delivery of assets.

What do you guys think? Am I on the right track?
posted by shelle at 8:45 PM on January 13, 2019 [2 favorites]


I'm personally not a fan of contractions in formal writing...
As a writer, editor, and strategist, I have extensive experience with the development and implementation of strategic goals for compelling, on-brand creative assets. In my current role as a content brief editor at Company, I write concise guidance for illustrators of diverse editorial content, and I work closely with editors to manage the overall brand vision and ensure timely delivery of assets.
posted by Little Dawn at 9:02 PM on January 13, 2019


Since you're really trying to sell yourself as a clear and concise writer, I'd work to make it shorter and more direct, along these lines:
I thrive on shaping brands [1]—as writer, editor, and strategist, I have ample experience [2] forming and carrying out strategic goals in the service of to create [3] compelling, on-brand creative assets. In my current role as content brief editor at Company, a digital publisher, I write concise communications briefs to clearly [4] guide [5] the artists who illustrate the company’s diverse editorial content. Skillfully summarizing practical concerns and overall brand vision [6], I work closely with editors to ensure the timely delivery of assets [7].
[1] I find it hard to believe that anyone "thrives on shaping brands," sorry.
[2] Anytime you find yourself putting the verb in -ing form, maybe see if you could just use the verb in active form.
[3] Shorter and more direct
[4] "Concise communications" is bulky (and in that context, ironic). Also, I'd generally get rid of self-praising adjectives and adverbs -- let the clarity and brevity of your letter speak for itself.
[5] Instead of "I write briefs to guide illustrators," you could also say "I write brief guides for illustrators," if you prefer.
[6] Since this describes the guides, I'd integrate this with the prior sentence. But see below -- I added it but then found myself wondering if it could be cut, as I'm not sure it adds much that isn't implied or stated elsewhere.
[7] Maybe pick a new word either here or where you use this above?

That leaves us with:
As writer, editor, and strategist, I form and carry out strategic goals to create compelling, on-brand creative assets. In my current role as content brief editor at Company, a digital publisher, I write briefs that summarize practical concerns and overall brand vision to [6] guide the artists who illustrate the company’s diverse editorial content and work closely with editors to ensure timely delivery of material.
posted by salvia at 9:50 PM on January 13, 2019 [6 favorites]


A lot of this sounds buzzwordy to me. Particularly "on-brand," "strategic goals," and "creative assets." I am not your target audience for this letter, so maybe those buzzwords actually signify something in your industry, but I got to the end of the paragraph and was unsure what you actually DO. Perhaps an example would help?
posted by basalganglia at 4:04 AM on January 14, 2019 [2 favorites]


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