Matching on Tinder... 30 years later.

August 18, 2017 2:45 PM

I just matched with a woman who attended middle school with me. I was able to instantly recognize her face and recall her name after over 30 years and was able to verify it was her via mutual "friends" on Facebook. How to message her?

Her profile description is blank so all I have to go on is a couple of mutual friends one of which I know only in passing and the other I only know because she is the wife of a friend and the middle school connection. Both feel weird to me but the last one feels especially weird as something to talk about in my first message. It doesn't help that I rarely send messages first to women with blank profile descriptions. Any ideas?

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posted by anonymous to Human Relations (4 answers total)

I think it would be weird if I dude I remembered from middle school didn't mention it in the first message! I'd OPEN with this. "Oh my gosh, I think we went to SuchAndSuch Middle School! I was in Mrs SoandSo's class!" And then she'll answer and this will all very naturally transition into a "what are you up to now?" convo.

It's not like you recognize her for some creepy reason. You literally knew her in middle school!
posted by Countess Sandwich at 2:51 PM on August 18, 2017 [47 favorites]

I would say exactly what was suggested by Countess Sandwich. Also, I don't think it's weird not to have a profile description, especially on Tinder where you swipe based on looks 90% of the time. Personally, I can't stand filling them out. Just send her a message about how funny it is that you went to middle school together and see where it goes!
posted by Marinara at 2:54 PM on August 18, 2017 [3 favorites]

Geez don't over think this.
'Hey we matched on Tinder, wow, I also remember you from B_____ Middleschool, City, 198Y!'

I hope you are both amused and thrilled, and I see this as a decently likely outcome :)
posted by SaltySalticid at 3:14 PM on August 18, 2017 [3 favorites]

I also matched with someone I knew in middle school, although this was in the olden days before Tindr so we just found each other on classmates.com.

Reader, I married her.
posted by RustyBrooks at 4:34 PM on August 18, 2017 [19 favorites]