Getting back in shape
July 28, 2017 2:43 PM Subscribe
Between job stress and surgery, I've kind of let myself go. I want to get back into fighting shape.
I hate that I'm writing this, but here goes.
A couple months ago, I had what was supposed to be a minor surgery but ended up having complications. I was in a lot of pain for about a month, and really just doing the bare minimum at work.
That came at a pretty awful time. Without getting too specific: I work in a field that's directly impacted by the current U.S. political situation. Nearly every week this year, there's been at least one all-hands-on-deck crisis. Without having much spare time, I've been eating out too much and not going to the gym enough. After the surgery, I quit going at all.
I'm finally feeling better, but it's really taken its toll on my body. It's really hard for me to wake up in the morning and I want to go to sleep as soon as I get home. It takes me longer to focus at work. I'm less interested in sex than I used to be.
And this has all been tough on me, because I feel like I've lost a lot of ground. I used to be very overweight and then I started working out and eating right and lost a lot of weight. I was still a little overweight, but in good shape otherwise. The nurses are always amazed when they see how good my blood pressure is.
I want to course correct, but I keep feeling down on myself, feeling like I'm starting from scratch. I'm under no delusion: I'm not looking to become an athlete or a male model. I'm just looking to be able to wake up in the morning and do the things I love.
I want to give myself a two-week bootcamp where I force myself to bounce back. I've never gone to a personal trainer or dietician or anything like that. And frankly, I doubt that would help much. My expectations seem so meager compared to the kinds of conversations I hear people having with trainers at the gym.
Here's what I have in mind:
- No eating out. Meals heavy on fresh vegetables. No soda, and only 2-3 alcoholic drinks a week.
- Go to sleep and get up at set times every day, even on the weekends.
- Exercise five times a week. Two of those days, focus on weight training. Do a mix of weights and cardio the other three.
- Have sex at least three times.
- No work two hours before bed, except in emergencies. Read something that's not for work every day.
Is this a good list? What would you add to it? How do I quit feeling like I failed myself?
Other details about myself: I'm 37 and a vegan.
Throwaway email: fightingshape2017@gmail.com
Thank you.
I hate that I'm writing this, but here goes.
A couple months ago, I had what was supposed to be a minor surgery but ended up having complications. I was in a lot of pain for about a month, and really just doing the bare minimum at work.
That came at a pretty awful time. Without getting too specific: I work in a field that's directly impacted by the current U.S. political situation. Nearly every week this year, there's been at least one all-hands-on-deck crisis. Without having much spare time, I've been eating out too much and not going to the gym enough. After the surgery, I quit going at all.
I'm finally feeling better, but it's really taken its toll on my body. It's really hard for me to wake up in the morning and I want to go to sleep as soon as I get home. It takes me longer to focus at work. I'm less interested in sex than I used to be.
And this has all been tough on me, because I feel like I've lost a lot of ground. I used to be very overweight and then I started working out and eating right and lost a lot of weight. I was still a little overweight, but in good shape otherwise. The nurses are always amazed when they see how good my blood pressure is.
I want to course correct, but I keep feeling down on myself, feeling like I'm starting from scratch. I'm under no delusion: I'm not looking to become an athlete or a male model. I'm just looking to be able to wake up in the morning and do the things I love.
I want to give myself a two-week bootcamp where I force myself to bounce back. I've never gone to a personal trainer or dietician or anything like that. And frankly, I doubt that would help much. My expectations seem so meager compared to the kinds of conversations I hear people having with trainers at the gym.
Here's what I have in mind:
- No eating out. Meals heavy on fresh vegetables. No soda, and only 2-3 alcoholic drinks a week.
- Go to sleep and get up at set times every day, even on the weekends.
- Exercise five times a week. Two of those days, focus on weight training. Do a mix of weights and cardio the other three.
- Have sex at least three times.
- No work two hours before bed, except in emergencies. Read something that's not for work every day.
Is this a good list? What would you add to it? How do I quit feeling like I failed myself?
Other details about myself: I'm 37 and a vegan.
Throwaway email: fightingshape2017@gmail.com
Thank you.
The MyFitnessPal app and a Fitbit Alta grabbed from Amazon when they had a big sale a couple of months ago have changed my life. I log every single thing that goes into my mouth except for coffee, water and seltzer (which is pretty much all I drink) on MyFitnessPal. I set it up to lose two pounds a week, which is the most it will let you do, and set it for "sedentary," which will give me the least number of calories I am "allowed" to consume each day, and also has percentages for fat, carbs and protein (protein intake is KEY). It's likely the same kind of this as Lose It!. Seriously, logging calories has been a huge help. I have changed some things I eat (God, not a bite of Entemann's raspberry danish twist since the beginning of June, and very few things with added sugar at all), but I have not super dramatically altered what I eat, I just eat less of it.
As for the exercise, logging my steps every day has been a huge help. But I found that my video game mindset of wanting to set the high score led me to grossly overwalking for a few weeks, and I am fighting to ramp it down to a reasonable level. You might be pushing it too hard to exercise five days a week. Why not three a week to start? Also, maybe lay off the strength training till you lose some pounds? I plan on doing stength training, but right now I am more focused on losing some weight first.
Your expectations are NOT meager. You need to ease into this slowly. It's big changes you are looking for, and if you go all-out at first, you might not stick with it. Also, the Lose It subReddit is a great little community of people losing and helping others lose weight. I strongly urge you to take a look there and see if it is to your liking
posted by old_growler at 3:54 PM on July 28, 2017
As for the exercise, logging my steps every day has been a huge help. But I found that my video game mindset of wanting to set the high score led me to grossly overwalking for a few weeks, and I am fighting to ramp it down to a reasonable level. You might be pushing it too hard to exercise five days a week. Why not three a week to start? Also, maybe lay off the strength training till you lose some pounds? I plan on doing stength training, but right now I am more focused on losing some weight first.
Your expectations are NOT meager. You need to ease into this slowly. It's big changes you are looking for, and if you go all-out at first, you might not stick with it. Also, the Lose It subReddit is a great little community of people losing and helping others lose weight. I strongly urge you to take a look there and see if it is to your liking
posted by old_growler at 3:54 PM on July 28, 2017
I would recommend giving yourself one week for each new habit. If you're coming off of physical and emotional stress, don't just hop right back in by piling all these expectations on yourself.
Week one, sleep habits.
Week 2-3, eating improvements with the veggies and the cutting out soda.
Week 3, exercise 3x per week.
Week 4, 4x per week.
Week 5, 5x per week.
I mean for crying out loud, you're still healing from surgery. Are you even cleared for lifting weights? What does your doctor say? You're 37, not 17. You're not just gonna snap out of it and hit the ground running. You need to slow your roll a bit to get up to speed.
posted by Autumnheart at 3:54 PM on July 28, 2017 [5 favorites]
Week one, sleep habits.
Week 2-3, eating improvements with the veggies and the cutting out soda.
Week 3, exercise 3x per week.
Week 4, 4x per week.
Week 5, 5x per week.
I mean for crying out loud, you're still healing from surgery. Are you even cleared for lifting weights? What does your doctor say? You're 37, not 17. You're not just gonna snap out of it and hit the ground running. You need to slow your roll a bit to get up to speed.
posted by Autumnheart at 3:54 PM on July 28, 2017 [5 favorites]
Busy people often find they need to eat prepared meals, so "no eating out" might not be the best way to set yourself up for success.
Are there restaurants or grocery stores where you can get meals prepared to your standards of vegan and heavy on fresh vegetables? If so, I would say to allow yourself to eat those freely. And any convenience foods: frozen veggies, piles of pre-washed, pre-chopped veggies. Make it easy on yourself.
posted by Former Congressional Representative Lenny Lemming at 4:01 PM on July 28, 2017 [1 favorite]
Are there restaurants or grocery stores where you can get meals prepared to your standards of vegan and heavy on fresh vegetables? If so, I would say to allow yourself to eat those freely. And any convenience foods: frozen veggies, piles of pre-washed, pre-chopped veggies. Make it easy on yourself.
posted by Former Congressional Representative Lenny Lemming at 4:01 PM on July 28, 2017 [1 favorite]
As an overcommitted professional, I find that the two most important things that affect my sense of well-being are (1) exercising regularly and (2) getting enough sleep. So if I were in your shoes, I'd focus on those first. Move on to diet afterwards. But the suggestion to find a restaurant or grocery that has reasonably healthy and not too heavy convenience food is great. If I had to choose, I'd rather do an hour-long bike ride and eat an Amy's burrito than make dinner from scratch and skip the ride (though ideally I'd do both).
posted by brianogilvie at 4:18 PM on July 28, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by brianogilvie at 4:18 PM on July 28, 2017 [3 favorites]
Just because lots of people at the gym are hyperpositive (I assume you are american by your post) doesn't mean you couldn't benefit from having a personal trainer. I have never gone that route but do enjoy HIIT or interval strength type classes. I also LOVED physical therapy but think I lucked out and got a A+ person on the first shot as many trusted peers found theirs useless or hated it etc. I'm not saying definitely do it but if you need to get back into something and it sounds kinda like you are dreading it or forcing yourself, accountability can help.
Your plan sounds good except for three things: sex, "mostly vegetable" vegan meals (not enough protein for that much exercise and maybe not enough calories overall for a man of your weight?), bed times. Trying to hit a sleep or sex deadline seems needlessly stressful since you are not entirely in control of these matters, whereas waking up at a set time or ensuring you have adequate calories are both easily fixable. Note: I lived happily on a mostly vegetable vegan diet for a while but I am a small woman and I basically chowed down on the veg and fruit all day--I could not do this now and if I tried a "mostly veg" 2 week restart would likely drastically reduce my muscle mass. You may have a better diet already worked out that is well balanced but wanted to point out that it's not good to dive into a lot of exercise while not eating enough. Just makes you tired.
Also amy's frozen burritos are super good and I would eat one every day if I could afford it (both cost and calorie wise).
posted by love2potato at 5:05 PM on July 28, 2017
Your plan sounds good except for three things: sex, "mostly vegetable" vegan meals (not enough protein for that much exercise and maybe not enough calories overall for a man of your weight?), bed times. Trying to hit a sleep or sex deadline seems needlessly stressful since you are not entirely in control of these matters, whereas waking up at a set time or ensuring you have adequate calories are both easily fixable. Note: I lived happily on a mostly vegetable vegan diet for a while but I am a small woman and I basically chowed down on the veg and fruit all day--I could not do this now and if I tried a "mostly veg" 2 week restart would likely drastically reduce my muscle mass. You may have a better diet already worked out that is well balanced but wanted to point out that it's not good to dive into a lot of exercise while not eating enough. Just makes you tired.
Also amy's frozen burritos are super good and I would eat one every day if I could afford it (both cost and calorie wise).
posted by love2potato at 5:05 PM on July 28, 2017
I am not a fitness guru.
I'm not sure what the problem is with eating out, as long as you make reasonable choices. It sounds like you have a lot of demands on your time, and cooking your own meals is both time and labor intensive - cleaning veggies, actual cooking, then cleaning up afterwards. Frozen prepared foods can also be healthy and time-efficient.
The way I currently understand willpower is that it's a limited resource. You can build it, like a muscle, but like a muscle it can be fatigued. If you try to avoid all soda AND eat 80% veg AND cook all your meals AND work out 5/7 AND be super-disciplined and focused at your stressful job etc etc, you may find yourself over-budget on willpower (assuming these are all stretch goals for you, and you're in the habit of really enjoying soda and non-veg food and that those things are a way of self-comforting, and you kind of need the self-comforting right now).
Taking that into account, in your shoes I would want to make sure that you're setting yourself up to succeed, and to end your two-week bootcamp not frazzled, depleted, and ready to eat every chocolate-chip cookie in sight, but energized and ready to set yourself a new challenge. That might mean experimenting and making adjustments as you go along, and not holding yourself to a rigid standard.
posted by bunderful at 6:02 PM on July 28, 2017
I'm not sure what the problem is with eating out, as long as you make reasonable choices. It sounds like you have a lot of demands on your time, and cooking your own meals is both time and labor intensive - cleaning veggies, actual cooking, then cleaning up afterwards. Frozen prepared foods can also be healthy and time-efficient.
The way I currently understand willpower is that it's a limited resource. You can build it, like a muscle, but like a muscle it can be fatigued. If you try to avoid all soda AND eat 80% veg AND cook all your meals AND work out 5/7 AND be super-disciplined and focused at your stressful job etc etc, you may find yourself over-budget on willpower (assuming these are all stretch goals for you, and you're in the habit of really enjoying soda and non-veg food and that those things are a way of self-comforting, and you kind of need the self-comforting right now).
Taking that into account, in your shoes I would want to make sure that you're setting yourself up to succeed, and to end your two-week bootcamp not frazzled, depleted, and ready to eat every chocolate-chip cookie in sight, but energized and ready to set yourself a new challenge. That might mean experimenting and making adjustments as you go along, and not holding yourself to a rigid standard.
posted by bunderful at 6:02 PM on July 28, 2017
It's a great list.
Help yourself be successful with rewards. Use a wall calendar. You have daily goals. For every goal achieved, you get a check mark(use a different color for each goal type if you a a person who has lots of markers and stuff). Be generous, you had kale at lunch even though you don't love it - that's a check mark. On any day that you get 5 check marks, add a star. For every n stars, you get a reward. For any week with 5 stars, you get a reward. If you have lifting goals, or sleep goals, etc., as you achieve them, you get a reward.
Rewards can be: Colorful stars on the calendar, a new song at itunes, a new app, anything small and tangible and not bad for your health. You can buy a package of glow-in-the-dark stars, and use those. When you look at your calendar, seeing the check marks is positive feedback, tangible rewards, even small ones, encourage you to keep earning. It feels like being back in 2nd grade to set it up, but it works.
posted by theora55 at 11:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
Help yourself be successful with rewards. Use a wall calendar. You have daily goals. For every goal achieved, you get a check mark(use a different color for each goal type if you a a person who has lots of markers and stuff). Be generous, you had kale at lunch even though you don't love it - that's a check mark. On any day that you get 5 check marks, add a star. For every n stars, you get a reward. For any week with 5 stars, you get a reward. If you have lifting goals, or sleep goals, etc., as you achieve them, you get a reward.
Rewards can be: Colorful stars on the calendar, a new song at itunes, a new app, anything small and tangible and not bad for your health. You can buy a package of glow-in-the-dark stars, and use those. When you look at your calendar, seeing the check marks is positive feedback, tangible rewards, even small ones, encourage you to keep earning. It feels like being back in 2nd grade to set it up, but it works.
posted by theora55 at 11:33 AM on July 29, 2017 [1 favorite]
I would not suggest going from 0 to 5 days a week at the gym unless they are short/gentle workouts. If you go too hard too fast you'll probably hurt or exhaust yourself.
Honestly I think you need to give yourself more than two weeks to get all this stuff rolling. It's a lot from 0! I'd add one or two new habits every week and strengthen each habit for a bit until it was routine before adding more.
As for sex, I mean, don't try to force yourself to have sex if you don't want to, I can't imagine that being a good idea. Your libido will perk up when it's ready.
Don't be so hard on yourself. You don't need to be perfect, just improving. Every one of those guys at the gym started out unable to even lift the bar (ok maybe not literally but you know what I mean).
posted by windykites at 5:51 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
Honestly I think you need to give yourself more than two weeks to get all this stuff rolling. It's a lot from 0! I'd add one or two new habits every week and strengthen each habit for a bit until it was routine before adding more.
As for sex, I mean, don't try to force yourself to have sex if you don't want to, I can't imagine that being a good idea. Your libido will perk up when it's ready.
Don't be so hard on yourself. You don't need to be perfect, just improving. Every one of those guys at the gym started out unable to even lift the bar (ok maybe not literally but you know what I mean).
posted by windykites at 5:51 PM on July 29, 2017 [2 favorites]
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Do this one step at a time. You are being very, very hard on yourself. The goal here is lifestyle change that is maintainable, so don't construct a mountain of expectations for yourself. Take it slow, take it steady, get some support and some better habits.
posted by bearwife at 3:35 PM on July 28, 2017 [3 favorites]