Poetry about relationships ending
June 7, 2017 8:04 AM Subscribe
Inspired by the recent thread about wedding readings, and Stephen Dunn's "Each from different heights" can you suggest any non religious poetry about relationships ending?
Links to previous threads also appreciated - I searched and couldn't find any.
Links to previous threads also appreciated - I searched and couldn't find any.
Oh, when I was in love with you, by A. E. Housman
posted by ubiquity at 8:18 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by ubiquity at 8:18 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
For the other side of the marriage Jack Gilbert describes, I recommend "Asking for Directions" by Linda Gregg. (These two are the king and queen of this genre.)
posted by rabbitbookworm at 8:44 AM on June 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by rabbitbookworm at 8:44 AM on June 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
Since There's No Help, Come Let Us Kiss and Part, Michael Drayton
posted by Jane the Brown at 8:46 AM on June 7, 2017
posted by Jane the Brown at 8:46 AM on June 7, 2017
Oh, and Sharon Olds' "Past Future Imperfect."
posted by rabbitbookworm at 9:01 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by rabbitbookworm at 9:01 AM on June 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
The Lovingkindness Survival Kit (archive link; original page is defunct) by Suzette Haden Elgin (RIP) has a piece called "Separation" that might fit. Also the one called "Consolation".
posted by Lexica at 10:44 AM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Lexica at 10:44 AM on June 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
Wendy Cope's 'Loss':
The day he moved out was terrible -posted by Catseye at 11:46 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
That evening she went through hell.
His absence wasn’t a problem
But the corkscrew had gone as well.
Joseph Brodsky's "Six Years Later."
Marina Tsvetaeva's very long "Poem of the End." You'll need to get a book to read a full English translation; I recommend Nina Kossman's or David McDuff's, not Elaine Feinstein's (which is actually more of a paraphrase). Here is the Russian in case you can read it.
posted by Perodicticus potto at 1:14 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
Marina Tsvetaeva's very long "Poem of the End." You'll need to get a book to read a full English translation; I recommend Nina Kossman's or David McDuff's, not Elaine Feinstein's (which is actually more of a paraphrase). Here is the Russian in case you can read it.
posted by Perodicticus potto at 1:14 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
One of my favorites is "One Art" by Elizabeth Bishop (which might be better known by its first line: "The art of losing isn't hard to master").
Here's a good previous AskMe thread: What are your favorite poems about the end of a relationship? (which includes "One Art" as well as Gilbert's "Failing and Flying" mentioned above).
posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 1:27 PM on June 7, 2017
Here's a good previous AskMe thread: What are your favorite poems about the end of a relationship? (which includes "One Art" as well as Gilbert's "Failing and Flying" mentioned above).
posted by rangefinder 1.4 at 1:27 PM on June 7, 2017
AFTER THE STORM
We used to call what ruined us the storm,
Though that suggests we could have seen it break
And barred the door. But it was multiform:
It got inside, it made a teacup shake,
It sought us out where we lay half awake.
Now it was here, what would it make us do?
When we were thrown together, then we knew.
It sometimes hit us even while we fought.
One sideways look, and soon the skin and hair
Were flying in a different sense. I thought
The consequences too extreme to bear:
This was the lion’s den, the dragon’s lair,
The storm. You used to say you felt the same,
When you could speak again, and spoke my name.
When the storm raged, I tried to hide in you.
Your only refuge was to cling to me.
The way we rode it out was why it grew
In fury, until you began to see
Your only chance to live was liberty.
So now you have the life you should have had,
And I am glad. No, I am very glad.
Visiting you, I see that it was worth
My loss. A family picnic on the beach.
Your beauty, still like nothing else on earth,
Here shows its purpose. No regrets. Yet each
Of us is well aware that your sweet speech
Is only tender, my glance merely warm.
This is just love. It’s nothing like the storm.
- Clive James
SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE
You met me to apologise, you were saying
as we waited in the drizzle for the slow train.
When it focused in we said goodbye and we kissed
and from the window you were caught; teary and fixed.
You ran across the wooden bridge, I knew you would,
to get down on the other platform and to wave,
but as you did the eastbound Leeds train flickered past
and ran you like a movie through its window-frames.
I keep those animated moments of you as
our catalogue of chances rushed and chances missed.
- Simon Armitage
NOTE SLIPPED UNDER A DOOR
I saw a high window struck blind
By the late afternoon sunlight.
I saw a towel
With many dark fingerprints
Hanging in the kitchen.
I saw an old apple tree,
A shawl of wind over its shoulders,
Inch its lonely way
Toward the barren hills.
I saw an unmade bed
And felt the cold of its sheets.
I saw a fly soaked in pitch
Of the coming night
Watching me because it couldn't get out.
I saw stones that had come
From a great purple distance
Huddle around the front door.
- Charles Simic
FRAGMENT ON DISSEMBLING
Curious in your dark
Frock-coat, do everything
That you have to,
If it is time;
Leave nothing
Still unsaid.
Once, to make of nothing
Something, was divine.
To have made
Of something
Nothing, was sublime.
- Lucie Brock-Broido
Edit: how embarrassing is it to have seen the first three poems I answered with in a prior thread, as linked to by rangefinder 1.4? Either a testament to my memory, or senility, the power of poetry, or the boredom of my mind!
posted by herrdoktor at 8:40 PM on June 7, 2017
We used to call what ruined us the storm,
Though that suggests we could have seen it break
And barred the door. But it was multiform:
It got inside, it made a teacup shake,
It sought us out where we lay half awake.
Now it was here, what would it make us do?
When we were thrown together, then we knew.
It sometimes hit us even while we fought.
One sideways look, and soon the skin and hair
Were flying in a different sense. I thought
The consequences too extreme to bear:
This was the lion’s den, the dragon’s lair,
The storm. You used to say you felt the same,
When you could speak again, and spoke my name.
When the storm raged, I tried to hide in you.
Your only refuge was to cling to me.
The way we rode it out was why it grew
In fury, until you began to see
Your only chance to live was liberty.
So now you have the life you should have had,
And I am glad. No, I am very glad.
Visiting you, I see that it was worth
My loss. A family picnic on the beach.
Your beauty, still like nothing else on earth,
Here shows its purpose. No regrets. Yet each
Of us is well aware that your sweet speech
Is only tender, my glance merely warm.
This is just love. It’s nothing like the storm.
- Clive James
SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE
You met me to apologise, you were saying
as we waited in the drizzle for the slow train.
When it focused in we said goodbye and we kissed
and from the window you were caught; teary and fixed.
You ran across the wooden bridge, I knew you would,
to get down on the other platform and to wave,
but as you did the eastbound Leeds train flickered past
and ran you like a movie through its window-frames.
I keep those animated moments of you as
our catalogue of chances rushed and chances missed.
- Simon Armitage
NOTE SLIPPED UNDER A DOOR
I saw a high window struck blind
By the late afternoon sunlight.
I saw a towel
With many dark fingerprints
Hanging in the kitchen.
I saw an old apple tree,
A shawl of wind over its shoulders,
Inch its lonely way
Toward the barren hills.
I saw an unmade bed
And felt the cold of its sheets.
I saw a fly soaked in pitch
Of the coming night
Watching me because it couldn't get out.
I saw stones that had come
From a great purple distance
Huddle around the front door.
- Charles Simic
FRAGMENT ON DISSEMBLING
Curious in your dark
Frock-coat, do everything
That you have to,
If it is time;
Leave nothing
Still unsaid.
Once, to make of nothing
Something, was divine.
To have made
Of something
Nothing, was sublime.
- Lucie Brock-Broido
Edit: how embarrassing is it to have seen the first three poems I answered with in a prior thread, as linked to by rangefinder 1.4? Either a testament to my memory, or senility, the power of poetry, or the boredom of my mind!
posted by herrdoktor at 8:40 PM on June 7, 2017
Another previous thread: poetry recommendations for the broken-hearted
posted by bethnull at 9:08 PM on June 7, 2017
posted by bethnull at 9:08 PM on June 7, 2017
"You Haven't Texted Since Saturday" by Michael Robbins.
posted by old_growler at 9:25 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by old_growler at 9:25 PM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: These are perfect, thank you all.
posted by limoncello at 11:48 PM on June 7, 2017
posted by limoncello at 11:48 PM on June 7, 2017
breakup jams! omg i have trained all my life for this question.
(For transparency: most of these are self-links to a poem-a-day blog that two friends and I contribute to.
I'm interpreting the prompt broadly. I know not all of these poems are "about" romantic relationships ending per se, at least on a narrative level; a couple of them might be about death, or grief, or friendship, or life after love, etc.)
Mindy Nettifee - All I Have to Say for Myself
Ted Kooser - The Witness
Mary Oliver - In Blackwater Woods
William Stafford - Purifying the Language of the Tribe
Susan B. A. Somers-Willett - Matter and Void
Robert Hass - Variations on a Passage in Edward Abbey
Marie Howe - What the Living Do
Kay Ryan - Still Start
Ada Limón - The Conditional
Warsan Shire - For Women Who Are 'Difficult' to Love
Brynn Saito - The Palace of Contemplating Departure
Sandra Lim - Aubade
Jane Hirshfield - For What Binds Us
(I'll also second "Washing The Elephant", as thrungva is one of the few real loves-of-my-life. 💑📚)
posted by omnomnOMINOUS at 8:57 AM on June 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
(For transparency: most of these are self-links to a poem-a-day blog that two friends and I contribute to.
I'm interpreting the prompt broadly. I know not all of these poems are "about" romantic relationships ending per se, at least on a narrative level; a couple of them might be about death, or grief, or friendship, or life after love, etc.)
Mindy Nettifee - All I Have to Say for Myself
Ted Kooser - The Witness
Mary Oliver - In Blackwater Woods
William Stafford - Purifying the Language of the Tribe
Susan B. A. Somers-Willett - Matter and Void
Robert Hass - Variations on a Passage in Edward Abbey
Marie Howe - What the Living Do
Kay Ryan - Still Start
Ada Limón - The Conditional
Warsan Shire - For Women Who Are 'Difficult' to Love
Brynn Saito - The Palace of Contemplating Departure
Sandra Lim - Aubade
Jane Hirshfield - For What Binds Us
(I'll also second "Washing The Elephant", as thrungva is one of the few real loves-of-my-life. 💑📚)
posted by omnomnOMINOUS at 8:57 AM on June 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
Antilamentation by Dorianne Laux
Frida Kahlo to Marty McConnell by Marty McConnell
Nothing by James Fenton
all via the wonderful (MeFi's own? not sure) Captain Awkward, from her recent post of Songs for the Dumped. (Note: these poems are not about being dumped.)
(Thank you for asking this - I had not read any of these three and I thought they were all amazing, so thank you for introducing me to them.)
posted by kristi at 1:42 PM on June 10, 2017
Frida Kahlo to Marty McConnell by Marty McConnell
Nothing by James Fenton
all via the wonderful (MeFi's own? not sure) Captain Awkward, from her recent post of Songs for the Dumped. (Note: these poems are not about being dumped.)
(Thank you for asking this - I had not read any of these three and I thought they were all amazing, so thank you for introducing me to them.)
posted by kristi at 1:42 PM on June 10, 2017
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posted by FencingGal at 8:07 AM on June 7, 2017 [1 favorite]