How do I actually wear a high necked bra without looking crazy?

April 3, 2017 3:37 PM

I recently bought a gorgeous high necked bra and I have no idea how to wear the damn thing. What kind of shirt/dress should I wear it with so I don't look ridiculous but I'm also not completely covering it up?

First of all, I'm a huge fan of the whole "wear a pretty bralette and let the edges peek out" look. I usually wear them with a v-neck top and it just much looks like I'm wearing a fancy camisole or something. I also wear ones with fancy/complicated back straps, to peek out of low-cut or backless tops.

So recently I was at my favorite lingerie store and I tried on this thing - so pretty!

At first I figured it was too impractical, but finally I went back a few weeks later and bought it. Now.... how do I wear it? Seriously. I can't figure out how to make it work with any shirt. I mean, I'm not going to put it under a turtleneck because then, why bother.

Here's what it looks like on SLIGHTLY NSFW - random lingerie model who is not me, but my body is similar. I've googled "how to wear high necked bras" but I just get a bunch of ridiculously messy suggestions that also wouldn't work for anyone who is A. over the age of 17 and B. bigger than an A cup. I wear a lot of tank tops, dresses, etc, so suggestions and links to outfits/ensembles would be great! I really don't want to regret this purchase!

posted by silverstatue to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (13 answers total)

This page has a few ideas

I was inclined to say like a stretched out/burnout tshirt with a really low v-neck, or a sort of tank dress that's loose. Also maybe sweaters with that sort of stretched out neckline that can be off one shoulder?
posted by euphoria066 at 4:08 PM on April 3, 2017 [10 favorites]

Maybe a very unfussy off the shoulder(s) grey sweater?
posted by ReluctantViking at 4:08 PM on April 3, 2017

How about an off-the-shoulder top? (Inspired by the very last photo on this page - one of the few that I could imagine my middle-age self wearing.)

I would also wear it under a open-weave sweater in lieu of a camisole. The sweater provides enough coverage that you aren't just wearing your bra as a top and bra not only provides modesty but the high neck part that shows helps people appreciate the part that is partly hidden.
posted by metahawk at 4:13 PM on April 3, 2017

Response by poster: I saw that 20 Styles site but... everyone on that page looks like they're twelve. I'm in my thirties. I can't get away with 90% of that stuff :)
posted by silverstatue at 4:26 PM on April 3, 2017 [1 favorite]

I would wear it with a regular button-down shirt, just not very buttoned.

I, too, love bralettes and wear them peaking out. Barely buttoned-downs are my go-to. I even got a tattoo in my cleavage recently for this reason (I'm not very busty and it's low enough down to hide very easily).
posted by crankyrogalsky at 4:55 PM on April 3, 2017 [2 favorites]

Honestly, I only wear high-neck bralettes with high-neck tops, like tank tops or tank dresses. I haven't found a good way to wear them without using a similar cut top.
posted by rachaelfaith at 6:20 PM on April 3, 2017

I'm thinking it would be good to look for necklines that show off the halter shape of the bralette -- it doesn't have to be a super-low neckline, but it should be wide enough to expose the outside edge of the bralette and at least little skin on each side (between the bralette and your shoulders). If you can't see where the bralette ends, it may just look like some sort of weird lacy bodysuit -- that's what I think might happen if you try to put it under a narrower V-neck. I think it'll probably match best with a wide scoop or off-the-shoulder neckline -- either would make a great frame for that halter shape.
posted by ourobouros at 8:27 PM on April 3, 2017 [1 favorite]

That is beautiful! I just bought a similar bra recently, and am also in my 30s. I've been wearing it under mock turtlenecks (though mine is slightly higher-necked, and just a bit peeks out over the top), and with button-down shirts that aren't buttoned all the way.

Also, don't underestimate the joy of wearing it under something that hides it completely. It can be a delightful secret.
posted by dizziest at 8:29 PM on April 3, 2017

I think some of the looks linked above could be rocked by more grown-up women, but in case you need more ideas: winter looks that seem more mature by sheer dint of more layers.
posted by satoshi at 9:24 PM on April 3, 2017

Best answer: What about a slouchy wrap sweater like this over it, shows the bra but not the boobs?
posted by fingersandtoes at 9:28 PM on April 3, 2017 [2 favorites]

"Under a loose tank top" is by far my favorite look for these. I've seen middle-aged women wear them and they look very great.
posted by stoneandstar at 9:28 PM on April 3, 2017 [2 favorites]

Best answer: I could see this under a black cowl neck tank. Or if you can find a black vest or waistcoat that could be worn as a shirt over the bra, that could be a nice aesthetic complement. Something like this perhaps.
posted by thrungva at 10:11 PM on April 3, 2017 [2 favorites]

I think because the cutout on yours goes so low, you'll either have a very sexy look with a plunging layer that plunges just as far, or you'll have to be okay with having the cutout shape cut in half (fractions?) by a higher neck. I'd probably drape myself with a big scarf or a pillowcase and figure out what neckline depth looks okay. (Or try on every open-necked top that you own.) Other high necked lacy pieces without the cleavage seem like they would be somewhat easier to style for daytime.
posted by puddledork at 8:25 AM on April 4, 2017