Is a DJ still a necessity?

October 5, 2016 1:42 PM

I’m getting married in a week and a half. We expect about 130 guests in an indoor venue. Thus far, I’ve rented speakers that I’m told will be sufficient for ambient music and then a dance floor, and I’m planning on creating a Spotify playlist to play from my laptop during the dance. Am I doing this wrong? Should I panic and try to find a DJ at the last minute?

I want people to dance and have fun, but until now I’ve been thinking that the good beer and good company and a loud curated playlist would be enough. I’m not a big dancer, and I thought this could be one area to save some money. I figured I could have some hip friends help me put together a playlist, crank up the cross fade, and press “play”. Will this work for an event my size? What can I do to ensure success?

posted by anonymous to Society & Culture (27 answers total)

You can totally do a Spotify playlist. You might want to have someone (a friend, or someone you hire) sort of "emcee" your reception, for first dances, something like that.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 1:45 PM on October 5, 2016 [5 favorites]

Sure, that can work, does all the time. I don't mind a wedding band but wedding DJs always kind of confuse me anyway.
posted by SaltySalticid at 1:51 PM on October 5, 2016 [1 favorite]

Definitely have ask a friend to be "on call" to keep an eye on it. Roomthreeseventeen is right about an emcee (particularly if you are doing things like cake cutting, announcing your arrival, you need the music turned down for toasts, dances with parents, etc.).
posted by avocado_of_merriment at 1:52 PM on October 5, 2016 [1 favorite]

I've been to weddings with shitty DJs and IMO a playlist being watched over by a friend is far superior to a last-minute DJ who may or may not be shitty.
posted by griphus at 1:56 PM on October 5, 2016 [15 favorites]

For us, the DJ was more helpful in terms by also acting as MC and keeping time and making announcements to round people up for this part of the wedding or that part of the wedding, introducing toasters and all that. If you have that part thought of, then a curated playlist (and maybe having someone able to make some song changes on the fly for dancing) would be fine.
posted by Karaage at 1:58 PM on October 5, 2016 [3 favorites]

Playlist is totally fine. We did that and everyone had a blast. Did not miss the DJ. Our wedding was more non-stop dance party after a certain point, but if yours is not, would nth the advice to have someone ready to pause it when necessary, etc.
posted by neematoad at 1:58 PM on October 5, 2016

I have had a few friends who have been wedding/event DJs. From what they've said, the biggest responsibilities are to 1. manage the mood on the dance floor through song choice (ie, if the dance floor is empty but there's still 2 hours left, play "Single Ladies" or "Hey Ya" - or conversely, slow things down at the end of the night or when toasts are about to start) 2. take requests and 3. act as emcee.

I think #1 is probably the biggest thing that it would be hard to have a friend sub in for, so I guess it's just a matter of how important that is to you.
posted by lunasol at 1:59 PM on October 5, 2016 [6 favorites]

You totally don't need a pro DJ but you should get a volunteer to commit now to assist with this stuff-- definitely don't rope someone into it the day of, and you might be too busy to take care of music.

There is some organization and timing to this task (if there are announcements, toasts, a first dance, etc.) so you ought to go over it with your volunteer ahead of time. This person can also be there for unexpected connectivity glitches or volume issues.

If you're not doing any announcements or a first dance or anything like that, you can literally just hit play. But there's usually a bit more to it in my experience.
posted by kapers at 1:59 PM on October 5, 2016

I just went to a pretty big wedding where the bride and groom made a jumbo playlist and just had a friend babysit it all night. This is really fun if your guests share your taste in music, and I think most of the people there LOVED the music and the dance floor was full all night. I think sometimes there can be pacing and momentum issues when you do it this way, and there were a few moments where everyone was like "....what song is this? I'm not dancing to this." It won't be a flawless experience, but weddings don't need to be perfect.
posted by cakelite at 2:11 PM on October 5, 2016 [2 favorites]

I have a lot of friends who have backyard weddings, so this is the norm rather than the exception for my crowd. It always works well. Maybe task somebody with skipping to a better song if you end up with a string of clunkers, but that should be all the oversight you need.
posted by MsMolly at 2:19 PM on October 5, 2016 [1 favorite]

I was an awesome dj for my own wedding. I made a CD with the songs in exactly the order I wanted. this was only for a bit of pop music after the main dancing (a ceilidh with a caller), but also so much better than any DJ - because they were all my favourite songs. (and a few of the husband's, but only ones that I really liked).
posted by jb at 2:25 PM on October 5, 2016

Since it seems to be a unanimous yes on the playlist approach (and I agree!), one note of caution: I would advise not counting on being able to stream the music from Spotify -- instead, I'd recommend that you download for offline listening within the app, buy music, burn CDs, anything but relying on streaming. The chances of venue wifi being down, cell service being spotty, Spotify's servers being down/glitchy, etc, would make me really nervous. Better to have your playlist entirely downloaded and ready to play straight from your device.
posted by CtrlAltDelete at 2:37 PM on October 5, 2016 [20 favorites]

Just in case this isn't readily apparent, you need an amplifier of some sort, in addition to the speakers.
posted by humboldt32 at 2:59 PM on October 5, 2016

Previously, for you! I remember thinking there were some excellent points to be made for both sides of the argument in here.
posted by a good beginning at 3:04 PM on October 5, 2016

I remembered that I had answered a similar question a while back. Rather than repeating it here, I will link to it. But the bottom line is a huge "it depends" both on your audience and your desires (and I have personally witnessed a wedding that badly needed a DJ or MC and didn't have one).
posted by primethyme at 3:38 PM on October 5, 2016

I have a side job with a catering company, so I'm at several weddings each month. A good wedding DJ is worth their weight in gold. He/she will announce the Captain's Call (if applicable), emcee the toasts, organize the garter/bouquet tosses and announce the cake cutting.

A good DJ can also read the room and play the right songs to get people up and dancing. Additionally, they can queue and time any special songs, shoo people outside for the departure of the Bride and Groom and announce Last Call. If you need to get a quick, unbiased referral, call your caterer. We see 'em all, and we know who can get the party started.
posted by workerant at 4:03 PM on October 5, 2016 [2 favorites]

If your wedding reception is a traditional wedding reception in every other sense (100+ guests of different age groups for sit down dinner, bride in gown, groom in tux, pro photographer, set speeches, cake cutting, etc...) then getting a good wedding DJ makes sense for reasons mentioned above, generally pacing the vibe all evening so it all flows smoothly together and makes sense.

If your wedding reception is meant to be casual, then you can just program the music any way you like.
posted by ovvl at 5:18 PM on October 5, 2016

humbolt32 - if you rent PA gear for an event this size you will almost certainly get "active" aka powered speakers, where the amplifier is built into the cabinet. You'd only get passive speakers as part of a package with a powered mixer, which wouldn't cut it for a dance party. Either way, the amp(s) will be included; no way does the rental agency trust you to pick one out on your own.
posted by crotchety old git at 5:30 PM on October 5, 2016

If you were three months out from your wedding, I'd suggest all the reasons a trusted non cheesy DJ is worth it. 10 days out, I think you'll be fine. Maybe crowd source your playlist a little and put someone In charge of working around dead spots.
posted by vunder at 10:35 PM on October 5, 2016

You definitely need somebody in charge of it - if a terrible song comes on while you're cutting the cake, or if the music just goes dead when you're trying to talk to the in-laws, you want somebody else to be able to fix it. You'll have far too much else to worry about on the day without adding this to your list of responsibilities.

But yep a playlist (especially one that guests can add to themselves) is fine. I've seen so many terrible wedding DJs, and if I hadn't been lucky enough to know some actual, decent club DJs there's no way I would have hired a mobile disco for mine (nobody ever wants to hear Come on Eileen or Mustang Sally at a wedding reception, or indeed anywhere else, so why do they always get played?).
posted by tinkletown at 11:28 PM on October 5, 2016

We did this! Here are some important notes if you're going to do it:

- DOWNLOAD IT fully, on at least two phones. We had it on two phones and a laptop. You do not want to craft that incredible playlist and then have to resort to someone's hideous itunes library cause you lost signal or your phone bricked.
- TURN ON FADE between songs, this is absolutely essential, I used a fade of 7 seconds which was spot on for avoiding that lull between songs that gives people time to lose their groove
- MAKE IT TAMPER-PROOF because oh yes your friends WILL try and mess about with it and put on the song they want next. Either have it run wirelessly and keep the device in your inside pocket, or have the person watching over it vow sincerely to not allow tampering by anyone regardless of what bribes or sexual favours are offered.
posted by greenish at 2:13 AM on October 6, 2016 [4 favorites]

My lovely wife and I got married in the late 1990s, long before ipods and Spotify. We hired a DJ, but shortly before the wedding, my groomsmen and I combed thru my CD collection, assembling three milk crates of CDs with track names and numbers and an Excel spreadsheet listing what to play in two stages -- a "play these in this order" for the initial part (my dance with her, our dances with our parents, etc.) and a "play these in any order" for the later dance party.

We also told her in no uncertain terms that she would not get paid if there was line dancing. Essentially we hired her not to pick music but to play it, but we were satisfied with the experience.

To make a long story short too late!, if we had had ipods and spotify, we'd totally have run the wedding playlist thru it. I'd say go for it. Ford knows there are enough "must have" wedding accouterments that aren't really. I endorse greenish's precautions, as well.
posted by Gelatin at 5:38 AM on October 6, 2016

In my experience there will always be someone at the party who would be happy to watch over the music, make announcements etc, but by all means make arrangements before hand. And for gosh sakes! make sure you have a back up plan. Corrupted files, connectivity issues etal can really put a damper on the party.

And congratulations on your upcoming nuptials. All the best!
posted by james33 at 6:13 AM on October 6, 2016

I think hiring a DJ is higher risk than not having one. You're inviting someone with their own amplification to come project their personality into your event. That might turn out great if you click with them, but it's less predictable and takes more vetting than having someone you know announce the cake cutting and so on.

I'm thinking here of a wedding shortly after ours where the groom was gritting his teeth at the DJ all night, and I was glad we'd gone with Spotify instead. His wedding was awesome and yours will be too, but I wish he hadn't had the extra thing to fret about.

We had a few Spotify playlists set up for offline use, for different phases of the evening. Our best man ended up getting coopted last minute to ride the playlists, so definitely nthing others who recommend finding someone for that in advance.
posted by john hadron collider at 6:48 AM on October 6, 2016

This might go without saying, but please spring for the Spotify subscription...I'd be mortified if all my guests had to listen to the stupid commercials it seems to play more and more frequently. Cheaper than a DJ, certainly.
posted by fiercecupcake at 7:51 AM on October 6, 2016

I want to echo the suggestion of having some way for the attendees to choose which songs (within reason) to play; one of my fondest wedding memories was at a reception where someone (okay, it was me) suggested playing Psycho Killers by the Talking Heads and people were dancing around and pretending to stab each other. It was a really fun and surreal moment that wouldn't have occurred otherwise.

You definitely want someone to monitor the music, though; ideally it will be someone that you know but aren't too close with, as your immediate friends will want to be more involved in being present at your wedding. Unless, of course, one of your close friends really enjoys playing DJ. Just keep in mind that you're trusting this person with the flow and groove of your wedding reception, so make sure that it's someone that you can trust to not get too drunk and stick with the program.
posted by Fister Roboto at 9:37 AM on October 6, 2016

I didn't think the DJ helped us from a music standpoint at all. "I don't care about music, you're a professional, play what makes sense for these situations." He still wanted to spend an hour together going over the playlist in detail, I can't emphasize to you how much I don't care about music, that was one of the worst hours of my wedding planning experience, I literally cried.

BUT it was very helpful to have a person there who both knew how to and was comfortable speaking into a mic and getting people to go places in the venue quickly but not forcefully. I was also very clear that I didn't want guests "working" at my wedding, other people feel differently but I've spent my time at all but two wedding in my life with a job and I really enjoyed those two weddings where I wasn't responsible for something on someone else's SUPER important day.
posted by magnetsphere at 7:56 AM on October 7, 2016