My cat is an asshole
July 11, 2016 12:57 PM Subscribe
My 15 year old cat is becoming more of a jerkface. He's always been a bigmouth, but within the past year he's ramped up the yowling. I took him in awhile back and the vet said there's nothing physically wrong with him, he's basically just an asshole (the vet was a bit more tactful). Now he's started attacking my other cat - they've been together for 10 years. What gives? What can I do?
I don't see them fight, but I've noticed that chunks of fur are missing from the back of goodkitty's neck and near his ears. Goodkitty seems just fine and he's bigger, so he should be able to defend himself. Many times they lay together and groom each other so it's not some sort of mutual hatred, but it concerns me that the violence has increased. Separating them when I'm sleeping/gone is not an option due to the layout of my apartment.
Nothing has changed in Jerkface's or my routine/living space for 2 years, but he's developed massive separation anxiety and yowls when I leave for work. Sometime I work from home, and he'll walk around meowing for HOURS. I have to lock myself in the bedroom when I want to concentrate. It's very stressful for me and I usually go into the office specifically to avoid him. Literally the only time he's happy is when I'm lying in bed with him. No food or litterbox changes (which he uses faithfully, thank god). He is eating and drinking normally, and doesn't appear to have gained or lost any weight (he's pudgy but not huge). He can hear and see fine. He grooms himself. He's not that interested in playing, but I think that's laziness/creaky joints more than malaise.
So - is he just a jerk? How can I reduce his (and my) stress level? (Catnip makes him more yowly, not chill. Cat grass is ignored.) I'm reluctant to throw lots of money on woo. I'm not sure something airborne like Feliway would work when I have to have open windows and fans running due to the heat.
Pics forthcoming.
I don't see them fight, but I've noticed that chunks of fur are missing from the back of goodkitty's neck and near his ears. Goodkitty seems just fine and he's bigger, so he should be able to defend himself. Many times they lay together and groom each other so it's not some sort of mutual hatred, but it concerns me that the violence has increased. Separating them when I'm sleeping/gone is not an option due to the layout of my apartment.
Nothing has changed in Jerkface's or my routine/living space for 2 years, but he's developed massive separation anxiety and yowls when I leave for work. Sometime I work from home, and he'll walk around meowing for HOURS. I have to lock myself in the bedroom when I want to concentrate. It's very stressful for me and I usually go into the office specifically to avoid him. Literally the only time he's happy is when I'm lying in bed with him. No food or litterbox changes (which he uses faithfully, thank god). He is eating and drinking normally, and doesn't appear to have gained or lost any weight (he's pudgy but not huge). He can hear and see fine. He grooms himself. He's not that interested in playing, but I think that's laziness/creaky joints more than malaise.
So - is he just a jerk? How can I reduce his (and my) stress level? (Catnip makes him more yowly, not chill. Cat grass is ignored.) I'm reluctant to throw lots of money on woo. I'm not sure something airborne like Feliway would work when I have to have open windows and fans running due to the heat.
Pics forthcoming.
It's extremely common for senior cats to develop hyperthyroidism, and one of the most common initial symptoms is an increase is yowling. Random behavioral problems are not as common but definitely not unheard of.
Time for kitty to see the vet again; a simple blood test will determine if it's hyperthyroidism, and if it is, a very inexpensive pill can treat the problem and resolve the behavior.
posted by jesourie at 1:05 PM on July 11, 2016 [11 favorites]
Time for kitty to see the vet again; a simple blood test will determine if it's hyperthyroidism, and if it is, a very inexpensive pill can treat the problem and resolve the behavior.
posted by jesourie at 1:05 PM on July 11, 2016 [11 favorites]
Prozac for cats is a real and effective thing.
posted by something something at 1:07 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by something something at 1:07 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
Seconding have the vet check for hyperthyroidism, which is easy to miss or misdiagnose in its early stages. It's also possible that your cat is developing a mild case of dementia, which would not be surprising at fifteen years old.
posted by thomas j wise at 1:10 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by thomas j wise at 1:10 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
Hyperthyroidism is the first thing I thought of. The second thing was dementia. Does he sometimes seem to get confused or lost? Does he keep you awake or act up at night, more than he used to?
If it's dementia, it might respond very well to the food supplement Cholodin. My dear old Tigger (may he hunt for heavenly mice for evermore) liked the stuff and ate it like a treat; one pill a day reduced his symptoms and made him visibly happier and calmer.
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:12 PM on July 11, 2016 [5 favorites]
If it's dementia, it might respond very well to the food supplement Cholodin. My dear old Tigger (may he hunt for heavenly mice for evermore) liked the stuff and ate it like a treat; one pill a day reduced his symptoms and made him visibly happier and calmer.
posted by Too-Ticky at 1:12 PM on July 11, 2016 [5 favorites]
The missing hair sounds more like obsessive grooming rather than a fight. One of my cats loves grooming the other's nape. It usually escalates into a tussle, because groomed kitty has a lower tolerance than for being groomed. Otherwise she would probably also have bald spots.
posted by politikitty at 1:19 PM on July 11, 2016
posted by politikitty at 1:19 PM on July 11, 2016
My kitty started losing her hearing around 15-16 and yowling a lot more...she may have had some dementia, too.
posted by Klaxon Aoooogah at 1:20 PM on July 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Klaxon Aoooogah at 1:20 PM on July 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Goodkitty does have bald patches, up to a square inch on the nape of his neck.
posted by AFABulous at 1:22 PM on July 11, 2016
posted by AFABulous at 1:22 PM on July 11, 2016
Thyroid was the first thing I thought of, followed by prozac. If the vet did not do a blood test to look at the thyroid levels then you need one. And maybe a vet that does cats only or focuses on cats . .it makes a difference especially as cats age, to have a vet that does not just kind of think of cats as "very small dogs."
posted by Medieval Maven at 1:25 PM on July 11, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Medieval Maven at 1:25 PM on July 11, 2016 [3 favorites]
My cat Crockles, Yowls all the time when he can't see me. He just paces around the house yowling until he finds me and even then he doesn't always stop... he just takes a break and carries on.
Vet also says there is nothing wrong with him.
What seems to help, is me loudly "Shhhhhhing" him when he is yowling.
Every time he yowls I do a very deliberate and very short, loud "SHHHHH" and without fail that shuts him up every time.
Having written all of this down now, I'll bet someone will tell me that by answering his yowl, I'm actually enabling his behavior and perpetuating the cycle of annoyance. Which is probably true because cats are weird, but I have nothing else to suggest here.
Good luck (I feel your pain!)
posted by JenThePro at 1:27 PM on July 11, 2016
Vet also says there is nothing wrong with him.
What seems to help, is me loudly "Shhhhhhing" him when he is yowling.
Every time he yowls I do a very deliberate and very short, loud "SHHHHH" and without fail that shuts him up every time.
Having written all of this down now, I'll bet someone will tell me that by answering his yowl, I'm actually enabling his behavior and perpetuating the cycle of annoyance. Which is probably true because cats are weird, but I have nothing else to suggest here.
Good luck (I feel your pain!)
posted by JenThePro at 1:27 PM on July 11, 2016
Dementia, perhaps, coupled with vision and hearing loss.
Lots of older cats "sundown", or go a bit crazy as night approaches.
He's acting like an "asshole" because he's freaking out. We had one like this; more cuddles, more holding, more Feliway, more tolerance of old age in kitties being even weirder than most of the weirdness of kitties in general.
Good luck.
posted by TryTheTilapia at 2:14 PM on July 11, 2016
Lots of older cats "sundown", or go a bit crazy as night approaches.
He's acting like an "asshole" because he's freaking out. We had one like this; more cuddles, more holding, more Feliway, more tolerance of old age in kitties being even weirder than most of the weirdness of kitties in general.
Good luck.
posted by TryTheTilapia at 2:14 PM on July 11, 2016
Yeah, this kind of behavior can be maddening, but it may help to remember that 15 is very old for a cat. His behavior may not be an issue much longer. Try to have some sympathy for the old guy and appreciate him while you have him. (I know that may be easier said than done.) If he's making you angry, it may be you've both gotten into a bad loop where his need for more love is driving you away, so he's increasingly insecure and needs even more love. Try to show him some extra patience and reassurance, and hopefully that will break the loop.
Is he a lap-cat? You say he's only quiet in bed beside you, but maybe he would quiet down if he was sitting in your lap while you're working. When he comes around yowling, try picking him up and sitting him on your lap. I know from experience that a very lap-y cat be kind of exhausting, but getting pinned under a sleeping cat is certainly preferable to coping with a yowl-y cat.
Maybe try setting up a little kitty bed in your home office, so he has a place beside you. Put one of his favorite toys on it, or something that smells like him, to encourage him to think of it as his spot. When he sits in it give him a treat and pet him for a while, so he gets comfortable. Cats generally learn by being bribed, rather than punished.
If you can work on your laptop, maybe you could shift from working in your office to working more in your bed. I know this may not be ideal, but again: He's old. Consider these special accommodations for your senior pal.
The thing that concerns me most is the fighting with your other cat. Keep their claws well-trimmed and consider nail caps.
Maybe consider dropping by home on your lunch hour, or even hiring a pet-sitter now and again.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 2:38 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
Is he a lap-cat? You say he's only quiet in bed beside you, but maybe he would quiet down if he was sitting in your lap while you're working. When he comes around yowling, try picking him up and sitting him on your lap. I know from experience that a very lap-y cat be kind of exhausting, but getting pinned under a sleeping cat is certainly preferable to coping with a yowl-y cat.
Maybe try setting up a little kitty bed in your home office, so he has a place beside you. Put one of his favorite toys on it, or something that smells like him, to encourage him to think of it as his spot. When he sits in it give him a treat and pet him for a while, so he gets comfortable. Cats generally learn by being bribed, rather than punished.
If you can work on your laptop, maybe you could shift from working in your office to working more in your bed. I know this may not be ideal, but again: He's old. Consider these special accommodations for your senior pal.
The thing that concerns me most is the fighting with your other cat. Keep their claws well-trimmed and consider nail caps.
Maybe consider dropping by home on your lunch hour, or even hiring a pet-sitter now and again.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 2:38 PM on July 11, 2016 [2 favorites]
My parents' 18-year-old cat does this yowling. We are pretty sure it's a combination of dementia and having trouble finding what he is looking for, because he also has sight and hearing problems. He's been doing it for a couple years now although it has ramped up the older he gets. He always stops if you sit there and pet him, because he can tell that you're there and it makes him happy.
I also think that the bald spots on the other cat are most likely from overgrooming by the old cat, especially if you never see fighting or blood. My parents' other cat, a neurotic 8-year-old Siamese, has been slowly grooming all of the fur off her belly in patches and it just looks like she's going bald.
I have a young adult cat who is actively a jerk (he was on kitty prozac for a while) and he does a lot more than yowling.
posted by possibilityleft at 2:45 PM on July 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
I also think that the bald spots on the other cat are most likely from overgrooming by the old cat, especially if you never see fighting or blood. My parents' other cat, a neurotic 8-year-old Siamese, has been slowly grooming all of the fur off her belly in patches and it just looks like she's going bald.
I have a young adult cat who is actively a jerk (he was on kitty prozac for a while) and he does a lot more than yowling.
posted by possibilityleft at 2:45 PM on July 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Awww poor kitty. Have you tried setting aside 10-15 minutes to just cuddle him? Since he's happiest when he's with you, it seems like that might help.
I have a super-independent and super-cuddly chatterbox who Really Super Duper Seriously Very Much Definitely Wants To Cuddle at times and it's the only thing that quietens her, which is adorable when you think about it. I can only imagine what she'll be like when she starts going senile.
Trust me, you'll miss his jerkface when he's gone. Cuddle that little twerp while you can.
posted by fraula at 3:07 PM on July 11, 2016
I have a super-independent and super-cuddly chatterbox who Really Super Duper Seriously Very Much Definitely Wants To Cuddle at times and it's the only thing that quietens her, which is adorable when you think about it. I can only imagine what she'll be like when she starts going senile.
Trust me, you'll miss his jerkface when he's gone. Cuddle that little twerp while you can.
posted by fraula at 3:07 PM on July 11, 2016
My cat displayed some of these behaviors all of a sudden, and Prozac worked wonders. He's been on it for several years, and he's had no trouble since then.
posted by Four-Eyed Girl at 3:07 PM on July 11, 2016
posted by Four-Eyed Girl at 3:07 PM on July 11, 2016
My cat definitely ramps up the yowling when I'm at home, because I work from home and can't have her in my lap while I type (whereas my partner plays games at home and can). I'll often spend part of the morning with her in my lap while I do research, so that when it comes to work time I can shift her off and she will either lay next to me, or go find some sun. If I don't do the lap time, it's on and off yowling all day until she falls asleep.
Over-grooming is a sign of anxiety too. The more we pat and spend time with Catch, the less she yowls and grooms. She was a rescue and has a LOT of separation anxiety.
posted by geek anachronism at 5:29 PM on July 11, 2016
Over-grooming is a sign of anxiety too. The more we pat and spend time with Catch, the less she yowls and grooms. She was a rescue and has a LOT of separation anxiety.
posted by geek anachronism at 5:29 PM on July 11, 2016
Feline Cognitive Dysfunction is definitely a thing in older kitties. It's similar to Alzheimer's. Symptoms include excessive yowling, not recognizing (& subsequently fighting with) other pets or people, wandering around, and other behavioral changes.
I'm researching it as we speak because my 14yo tortoiseshell woke up today not knowing where she was or who I was. A few other weird things lately make sense now after researching FCD. She's seeing a vet tomorrow. Hope you can get your guy in to a vet for a frank discussion about his age and health. Good luck!
posted by jhope71 at 5:36 PM on July 11, 2016
I'm researching it as we speak because my 14yo tortoiseshell woke up today not knowing where she was or who I was. A few other weird things lately make sense now after researching FCD. She's seeing a vet tomorrow. Hope you can get your guy in to a vet for a frank discussion about his age and health. Good luck!
posted by jhope71 at 5:36 PM on July 11, 2016
My cat - major yowler and 14 - was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism about 6 weeks ago. The vet suggested some other signs that can go with this: 1. Increased heart rate (normal range is 140 to 220 bpm. how to measure) 2. Eating lots of food but not putting on weight (due to super fast metabolism). 3) Vomiting and 4) Yowling. A quick blood test provides definitive diagnoses. Treatments range from low iodine food (my solution - and rapidly effective) through pills and surgery.
posted by rongorongo at 9:39 AM on July 12, 2016
posted by rongorongo at 9:39 AM on July 12, 2016
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Goodkitty
posted by AFABulous at 1:03 PM on July 11, 2016 [5 favorites]