My wife is not my granddaughter, I swear!
May 17, 2016 9:54 AM   Subscribe

How to change Facebook settings so Facebook doesn't show my wife as my granddaughter?!

This past weekend I attended a family member's memorial service and reconnected with many cousins I hadn't seen in ages. Many of us started suggesting each other as friends on Facebook. What I found most odd is that when I started typing my wife's name into the Facebook search at the top of their page is that underneath that it shows her as my granddaughter! In the About > Family and Relationships section she is shown as my wife in the Relationships section and is not listed below in the Family section, so I am at a loss as to how to correct this creepiness.

I have been unable find out how to fix this on Facebook, and am looking for help.

Here is a screenshot of what I see when I start typing her name.

Please hope me.
posted by terrapin to Computers & Internet (23 answers total)
 
(Exact terms may be inaccurate as my FB is in French. Apologies.)

-Click on your name to take you to your profile
-Click on About
-On the left-hand side, you should see a bunch of grey-text options, including "Family and relationships." Click on that.
-You should now see your 'Family connections'. One of them should be for your wife. Hover over her name to get an 'Edit' link (with a pencil icon) to the right.
-Click on Edit.
-Make her your wife.

If it didn't work, get her to do the same.
posted by flibbertigibbet at 10:00 AM on May 17, 2016


OK, go to your facebook page on the "About" section, and roll on down to the "Family and Relationships" part. You should see your wife there with a "grandaughter" by her name. Hover over her, click edit (it'll show up to the right in a little menu thingy) and change the relationship type. You'll have a little dropdown list of options. It may require you to remove her as a family member and add her up above that in the relationship status.

She might need to log in and do the same from her end.

But after that you oughta be all set.
posted by phunniemee at 10:00 AM on May 17, 2016


In the About > Family and Relationships section she is shown as my wife in the Relationships section and is not listed below in the Family section

Note that I said in my original question, she isn't the family section. I can't do the things you both suggest.
posted by terrapin at 10:23 AM on May 17, 2016


My "family" section allows me to add a new family member, does yours not show that option?

Edit: I see that "spouse" isn't allowed as an option there. Sorry!
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:27 AM on May 17, 2016


Edit: I see that "spouse" isn't allowed as an option there.

Correct, but isn't it amusing that "Pet (gender neutral)" is!
posted by terrapin at 10:33 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]


Submit a bug report to Facebook. This is a pretty clear functional defect.
posted by fraula at 10:33 AM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]


Looking at mine, it seems like "spouse" is not an option because that goes under "relationship status". Have you tried editing your relationship status and adding your wife there?
posted by rainbowbrite at 10:38 AM on May 17, 2016


... she is shown as my wife in the Relationships section and is not listed below in the Family section

She is already listed as my wife under relationships.
posted by terrapin at 10:41 AM on May 17, 2016


Have you looked at Facebook with her logged in? I thought family was reciprocal but maybe it's not and she has you as her grandpa.
posted by donnagirl at 10:54 AM on May 17, 2016 [3 favorites]


Have you checked your wife's page to see if she's listed you as her grandfather by mistake (or intentionally, lol)?
posted by sallybrown at 10:55 AM on May 17, 2016 [1 favorite]


Yes, My wife and I have reviewed her settings as well, and see nothing that would cause this issue.
posted by terrapin at 10:56 AM on May 17, 2016


When I do that search for my husband it doesn't show our relationship there at all. None of the search results there include information about how I relate to that person. It just shows schools & networks. Is your wife listed as anyone's granddaughter? Maybe it's just pulling from all of her relationships. I would try asking someone else to do the same search and see what comes up for them. But if this is the only place this is showing up I wouldn't worry about it.
posted by bleep at 11:18 AM on May 17, 2016


But if this is the only place this is showing up I wouldn't worry about it.

I don't disagree. Just creepy.
posted by terrapin at 11:28 AM on May 17, 2016


Just to be sure: Is she, in fact, the Owner-operator at Vermont Natural Sheepskins LLC?
posted by DanSachs at 11:49 AM on May 17, 2016


Yeah this is a stumper. Have you tried to edit your wife's info from your about > family and relationships > relationship section? Not the family members section. The edit button pops up on the right hand side of the relationship. I can't see anything that would suggest a grandchild relationship in that section, but I don't know what else to do. When I search for my family members in the way you describe, they come up listed correctly. I totally understand what you're asking and it also seems impossible for this to be happening, yet it is.
posted by cooker girl at 11:50 AM on May 17, 2016


Just to be sure: Is she, in fact, the Owner-operator at Vermont Natural Sheepskins LLC?

Yes. Although after I tried to edit her in Relationship settings, now when I search it still has granddaughter, but the owner/operator stuff is missing. Just the town we live in listed after.
posted by terrapin at 11:57 AM on May 17, 2016


Yeah this is an obvious bug report situation unless she jokingly did this, or maybe if there's another Sarah Ann somewhere in the family and Facebook got its wires crossed/THAT person listed you as their grandfather as a joke/on accident. Which I think would still be a bug.
posted by Sara C. at 12:39 PM on May 17, 2016


I submitted a bug report. Thanks for the suggestions.
posted by terrapin at 1:22 PM on May 17, 2016


"Granddaughter" listed in that spot means she belongs to a group called "Granddaughter", or has that in her own About/Career section. Check very carefully. That listing in that spot has nothing to do with you.

Or it's just a bug, of which there are many on Facebook.
posted by TinWhistle at 1:24 PM on May 17, 2016 [2 favorites]


Looking at both of your pages, you don't seem to be publicly listed in each other's relationship sections. No idea if that's anything to do with your issue.

Does it say "granddaughter" anywhere on her about page? Like granddaughter of such and such or something?
posted by yohko at 7:17 PM on May 17, 2016


"Granddaughter" listed in that spot means she belongs to a group called "Granddaughter", or has that in her own About/Career section. Check very carefully. That listing in that spot has nothing to do with you.

When I search my aunt on Facebook, it gives our relationship ("Aunt") in that exact spot. So too with my cousin.
posted by flibbertigibbet at 3:25 AM on May 18, 2016


Submitted a ticket to Facebook a while back, but no change. Appreciate the assistance, but this remains unresolved.
posted by terrapin at 6:41 AM on June 17, 2016


Mystery solved and I am embarrassed that I didn't think to check this sooner. It appears my wife had accidentally made family request and had it as granddaughter. She had removed it, but I never got a notice. So it was in my "family section" (BUT ONLY ON MY PHONE FFS!) as "pending." I deleted the request and poof, it was fixed.

I was motivated to fix it when I got a "X year anniversary as friends on Facebook" alert this morning but it read "Rick, you and your granddaughter, Sarah have been friends for 9 years."

Thanks for all the help, and for wasting people's time.
posted by terrapin at 5:13 AM on August 14, 2016 [1 favorite]


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