Emergency/EoL Digital Asset Planning
January 26, 2016 1:29 PM Subscribe
I'm trying to manage my emergency/end-of-life planning in an intelligent, secure and, hopefully, convenient way. What are the best tools and practices for digital asset planning?
I've done the major EoL groundwork – the will is done, advanced directives are set up, beneficiaries are named and so on. The issue now is preparing for someone to access/manage the digital stuff in the event that I am incapacitated or gone. I'm the finance manager for Spouse and myself, and I've thoroughly embraced online tools. Our bank is online only; income is direct deposited. Virtually all our expenses, from the utilities to the credit cards and insurance premiums, are e-billed and auto-paid. For one-offs, the bank's bill pay service works fine (there's a checkbook around somewhere, but I haven't used it in years). I use Mint to monitor our financial life, FileThis and scanning to capture and store our records in the cloud, and I have always done our personal taxes, online since that's been available. LastPass secures all credentials for all our many, many accounts (over 250 at last count, though probably half of those are just log-on credentials for various forums, news blogs, etc.). I am loathe to go back to paper.
Unfortunately, tech-wise, I am the one-eyed king in the land of the blind. Spouse understands – and wants to understand – precisely none of this. Doesn't even use email or text, let alone go online for any reason. Ditto any trusted family members/friends (yes, I come from a tribe of Luddites). Just finding and printing PDFs of key documents would likely be beyond their skills. We don't have a relationship with a lawyer or accountant. (Do they even do this kind of thing?)
For right now, my stop-gap solution is an un-passworded Spouse account on my personal laptop, with a single desktop icon labeled “Read This”. The linked document explains how to open and use LastPass (Spouse has the Master Password on a card in their wallet, a slight improvement over the proverbial post-it on the monitor). The rest of the document is a list of the most important accounts, what service they provide, how they get paid and any other important information I happen to think of. Hopefully, that would be enough to turn over to someone knowledgeable enough to help.
It's better than nothing, but I worry that Spouse will still be lost. Or that I'll fail to keep it updated. Or that the Master Password will be lost, the document will somehow get corrupted, my laptop will be stolen, a desperate Spouse will give the keys to the kingdom to someone unscrupulous, etc., etc. etc. I'm afraid to even add 2-factor authorization to LastPass, in case my phone is incapacitated when I am.
Is there a reliable service dedicated to dealing with such things? My google-fu has led down some blind alleys: this isn't about wiping online journals, preserving a “digital memorial” of photos and blogs, or sending final notes of remembrance to loved ones. Ideally, I'd like a dynamic and secure way of keeping track of financial accounts, with a way to authorize a trustee to access/close/put them back on paper billing as directed by Spouse. Everplans looked promising, but has a rather short history and few independent reviews I could find. Trust is obviously a very important factor here.
Surely this is a need someone is addressing? Recommendations? Experiences? Or even suggestions on how to improve my DIY solution?
I've done the major EoL groundwork – the will is done, advanced directives are set up, beneficiaries are named and so on. The issue now is preparing for someone to access/manage the digital stuff in the event that I am incapacitated or gone. I'm the finance manager for Spouse and myself, and I've thoroughly embraced online tools. Our bank is online only; income is direct deposited. Virtually all our expenses, from the utilities to the credit cards and insurance premiums, are e-billed and auto-paid. For one-offs, the bank's bill pay service works fine (there's a checkbook around somewhere, but I haven't used it in years). I use Mint to monitor our financial life, FileThis and scanning to capture and store our records in the cloud, and I have always done our personal taxes, online since that's been available. LastPass secures all credentials for all our many, many accounts (over 250 at last count, though probably half of those are just log-on credentials for various forums, news blogs, etc.). I am loathe to go back to paper.
Unfortunately, tech-wise, I am the one-eyed king in the land of the blind. Spouse understands – and wants to understand – precisely none of this. Doesn't even use email or text, let alone go online for any reason. Ditto any trusted family members/friends (yes, I come from a tribe of Luddites). Just finding and printing PDFs of key documents would likely be beyond their skills. We don't have a relationship with a lawyer or accountant. (Do they even do this kind of thing?)
For right now, my stop-gap solution is an un-passworded Spouse account on my personal laptop, with a single desktop icon labeled “Read This”. The linked document explains how to open and use LastPass (Spouse has the Master Password on a card in their wallet, a slight improvement over the proverbial post-it on the monitor). The rest of the document is a list of the most important accounts, what service they provide, how they get paid and any other important information I happen to think of. Hopefully, that would be enough to turn over to someone knowledgeable enough to help.
It's better than nothing, but I worry that Spouse will still be lost. Or that I'll fail to keep it updated. Or that the Master Password will be lost, the document will somehow get corrupted, my laptop will be stolen, a desperate Spouse will give the keys to the kingdom to someone unscrupulous, etc., etc. etc. I'm afraid to even add 2-factor authorization to LastPass, in case my phone is incapacitated when I am.
Is there a reliable service dedicated to dealing with such things? My google-fu has led down some blind alleys: this isn't about wiping online journals, preserving a “digital memorial” of photos and blogs, or sending final notes of remembrance to loved ones. Ideally, I'd like a dynamic and secure way of keeping track of financial accounts, with a way to authorize a trustee to access/close/put them back on paper billing as directed by Spouse. Everplans looked promising, but has a rather short history and few independent reviews I could find. Trust is obviously a very important factor here.
Surely this is a need someone is addressing? Recommendations? Experiences? Or even suggestions on how to improve my DIY solution?
Best answer: I am loathe to go back to paper.
GYST is the go-to for this.
But honestly, if your spouse is this tech-averse, print it all out on paper and put it in a safe deposit box which you both have the keys to. Don't make this more complicated than it needs to be. It sounds like you have a sort of low opinion of spouse's ability to manage things generally in which case then yes it's probably a good idea to find a tech savvy lawyer to serve as your executor and make them handle it for a fee. Have an accountant to manage bills and other things tax-related. Leaving this up to spouse to be able to know what to do with the One Password is setting up a single point of failure and is not an awesome idea and seems to be causing you anxiety. So I guess it comes down to: do you want a tech solution or do you want something that works for your spouse? There is no right answer to that question but what you seem to be saying is BOTH and you can't have that.
posted by jessamyn at 1:45 PM on January 26, 2016 [3 favorites]
GYST is the go-to for this.
But honestly, if your spouse is this tech-averse, print it all out on paper and put it in a safe deposit box which you both have the keys to. Don't make this more complicated than it needs to be. It sounds like you have a sort of low opinion of spouse's ability to manage things generally in which case then yes it's probably a good idea to find a tech savvy lawyer to serve as your executor and make them handle it for a fee. Have an accountant to manage bills and other things tax-related. Leaving this up to spouse to be able to know what to do with the One Password is setting up a single point of failure and is not an awesome idea and seems to be causing you anxiety. So I guess it comes down to: do you want a tech solution or do you want something that works for your spouse? There is no right answer to that question but what you seem to be saying is BOTH and you can't have that.
posted by jessamyn at 1:45 PM on January 26, 2016 [3 favorites]
It seems worth setting up the "someone knowledgeable to help" (a lawyer, perhaps?) in advance as well. And once you do that, this feature of LastPass (set up with the "someone knowledgable" as the emergency contact) might do the trick. If LastPass has some sort of secure note or secure document function you could also put the other info now in the unprotected file on your laptop into LastPass
posted by 2 cats in the yard at 3:36 PM on January 26, 2016
posted by 2 cats in the yard at 3:36 PM on January 26, 2016
I don't know much personally, but having met the CTO of Everplans I think they're a solid team (not a bunch of kids scrambling to throw something together). I was actually thinking of using them myself, if that gives you any confidence.
posted by ch1x0r at 8:22 PM on January 26, 2016
posted by ch1x0r at 8:22 PM on January 26, 2016
If spouse really isn't interested in understanding any of this including email, it doesn't matter what printouts you give them, they will be totally and permanently lost. Is there a family member you trust maybe? I have one family member who came to me and said I was in charge in that unfortunate future event, and where all the stuff was.
My hubby and I also have a joint email account so that either one of us can get into any accounts that affect us both. But if spouse doesn't do email that won't help.
I also have a loose leaf binder with account numbers and passwords. It being very low-tech and therefore low-overhead makes it easy for me to keep updated. And it's big and clunky so it never gets lost.
But most importantly I think you need to have a conversation with spouse about what kind of format/arrangement they will be able to deal with.
posted by bleep at 10:32 PM on January 26, 2016
My hubby and I also have a joint email account so that either one of us can get into any accounts that affect us both. But if spouse doesn't do email that won't help.
I also have a loose leaf binder with account numbers and passwords. It being very low-tech and therefore low-overhead makes it easy for me to keep updated. And it's big and clunky so it never gets lost.
But most importantly I think you need to have a conversation with spouse about what kind of format/arrangement they will be able to deal with.
posted by bleep at 10:32 PM on January 26, 2016
It may take some looking, but there are estate planning / probate lawyers who can offer the family assistance with accessing online information and essentially translating the digital to paper when needed.
posted by megatherium at 4:22 AM on January 27, 2016
posted by megatherium at 4:22 AM on January 27, 2016
Response by poster: Jessamyn and bleep, you raise some good points.
It's not that Spouse is incapable of managing (at least today), but that we've already discussed that they definitely wouldn't want to manage things the way I do. And it's not just that I don't want to go back to paper; technology has been the lynchpin of my organization skills since I first got my hands on Visicalc the year we met. Honestly, I'm not sure I could go back and re-learn non-tech-supported ways. A life-long tendency to lose papers and forget due dates doesn't tend to improve with age.
Either GYST or Life Organizer look like great tools to make sure that we haven't forgotten anything that can be printed and added to our safe deposit box. So I guess what I really need is a solid transition plan for everything else. Any tips on how to find that trusted, tech-savvy advisor who can smooth the way?
posted by peakcomm at 10:00 AM on January 27, 2016
It's not that Spouse is incapable of managing (at least today), but that we've already discussed that they definitely wouldn't want to manage things the way I do. And it's not just that I don't want to go back to paper; technology has been the lynchpin of my organization skills since I first got my hands on Visicalc the year we met. Honestly, I'm not sure I could go back and re-learn non-tech-supported ways. A life-long tendency to lose papers and forget due dates doesn't tend to improve with age.
Either GYST or Life Organizer look like great tools to make sure that we haven't forgotten anything that can be printed and added to our safe deposit box. So I guess what I really need is a solid transition plan for everything else. Any tips on how to find that trusted, tech-savvy advisor who can smooth the way?
posted by peakcomm at 10:00 AM on January 27, 2016
I think a tech-savvy person is precisely what you don't want. Spouse has to say what information they will need to manage things their way and you'll need to keep it updated for them. I'm thinking at the bare minimum they will need the checkbook and a statement for each account. Maybe you can sign up for paper statements and ask Spouse to be in charge of storing those; that way they will stay knowledgeable on their own terms?
posted by bleep at 10:55 AM on January 27, 2016
posted by bleep at 10:55 AM on January 27, 2016
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posted by bondcliff at 1:32 PM on January 26, 2016 [2 favorites]