Bed time tackled, seeking advice for napping 4 month old
December 16, 2015 9:17 AM Subscribe
I had such great responses and help from my previous question regarding night sleeping problems, ferber method and moving our 4 month old into her own room. Turns out all the Metas were right and I was creating a monster in my head! She cried for 6 minutes and since then doesn't cry when we put her to sleep awake in her crib and sleeps a good 12 hours with one feed!
NOW, napping is a HUGE issue.
Maybe it is because her sleep is so solid at night, she's adjusting. As I mentioned in my prior post, she was swaddled on her side on a boppy lounger for naps and bed. We have since removed all those props for bedtime and she is fine. She was taking 2 hour NAPS in the morning, followed by a couple 1 hour naps in the afternoon... now, she barely takes 3-4 30 minute naps, she won't stay asleep. Should I just keep at it letting her sleep however long she will (anywhere between 20-40 mins)without any of the props, and hope she gets use to it? I am just worried she is not getting the naps she needs during the day. I'm almost certain if I go back to swaddle on that lounger she will nap like she used to, but I want to remove all those props and I'm thinking it's just an adjustment period for her? It has been about 2 weeks since she has been sleeping on her own at night, without props, and about a week with this attempted nap schedule. She just isn't napping, she will however nap for 1-3 hours if someone is holding her or if she wakes up and i pick her up and put her next to me in bed during the day, but we do not do that often (maybe once or twice a week) so that she doesn't get used to it, but my point is I know she needs and wants those longer naps because she sleeps if being held I just dont know why she is not settling during the day like she is at night. She knows how to put herself to sleep because I put her down at night awake but drowsy, and sometimes in the middle of the night she will wake up laughing or talking to herself but eventually after 15 mins go back to sleep. Any suggestions???
Maybe it is because her sleep is so solid at night, she's adjusting. As I mentioned in my prior post, she was swaddled on her side on a boppy lounger for naps and bed. We have since removed all those props for bedtime and she is fine. She was taking 2 hour NAPS in the morning, followed by a couple 1 hour naps in the afternoon... now, she barely takes 3-4 30 minute naps, she won't stay asleep. Should I just keep at it letting her sleep however long she will (anywhere between 20-40 mins)without any of the props, and hope she gets use to it? I am just worried she is not getting the naps she needs during the day. I'm almost certain if I go back to swaddle on that lounger she will nap like she used to, but I want to remove all those props and I'm thinking it's just an adjustment period for her? It has been about 2 weeks since she has been sleeping on her own at night, without props, and about a week with this attempted nap schedule. She just isn't napping, she will however nap for 1-3 hours if someone is holding her or if she wakes up and i pick her up and put her next to me in bed during the day, but we do not do that often (maybe once or twice a week) so that she doesn't get used to it, but my point is I know she needs and wants those longer naps because she sleeps if being held I just dont know why she is not settling during the day like she is at night. She knows how to put herself to sleep because I put her down at night awake but drowsy, and sometimes in the middle of the night she will wake up laughing or talking to herself but eventually after 15 mins go back to sleep. Any suggestions???
How long ago did you take away the swaddle etc. for naps? If it was in the last week, I wouldn't worry just yet, and would let your daughter just sort it out for herself for now. My son was 4-5 months when he finally started having a solid nap routine (1.5-2 hours in the morning, 1 hour in afternoon, 30 min late afternoon catnap). Whenever I changed his sleep environment (moving to crib, taking away swaddle, etc.) it was a few days before he took to it and would have crappy short naps in the interim.
If it's been a week and naps are still crappy, I have a couple thoughts. Is her room dark enough? My son slept great in his room at night, but he couldn't nap until we got blackout curtains. The swaddling may be comforting enough to override the brightness; my son seemed to have this issue too, except his comfort was the swing.
Also, she may be napping more lightly than she sleeps at nighttime, so that is why she is more easily startling herself awake for naps. I know you want to get rid of props, but you might want to look at transitional products like the zipadeezip or merlin blanket to ease her off the swaddle without going cold turkey. My son napped in a swing for months before he would nap in his crib because he clearly preferred the extra "cuddling" he got from the sides of the swing.
posted by gatorae at 9:57 AM on December 16, 2015
If it's been a week and naps are still crappy, I have a couple thoughts. Is her room dark enough? My son slept great in his room at night, but he couldn't nap until we got blackout curtains. The swaddling may be comforting enough to override the brightness; my son seemed to have this issue too, except his comfort was the swing.
Also, she may be napping more lightly than she sleeps at nighttime, so that is why she is more easily startling herself awake for naps. I know you want to get rid of props, but you might want to look at transitional products like the zipadeezip or merlin blanket to ease her off the swaddle without going cold turkey. My son napped in a swing for months before he would nap in his crib because he clearly preferred the extra "cuddling" he got from the sides of the swing.
posted by gatorae at 9:57 AM on December 16, 2015
Our daughter is 17ish months now, and although she does daycare (it sounds like you have her at home), she was one of those kids who just did not really nap on a set schedule. She would take 15-30 minute naps a couple times a day, but that was really it. We'd pick her up from daycare and she'd go to sleep almost immediately around 6.
I think part of that was due to feeding, too; when she turned one and went to the toddler room, she had three meals a day plus a snack, at predictable times, and suddenly she was amenable to a two-hour nap from 12-2. Contrast that to feeding her milk or baby food: we would feed her every couple of hours, and then she'd go back to lying around and doing whatever she was doing.
So I hate to say it, having been there myself, but you may just have to wait it out and see how things go. I hear you on being worried about how much rest she's getting, but as long as you give her opportunities to be comfortable, she will take them when she can.
Also, how is she doing with rolling? Is she getting closer to rolling from front to back, or back to front? I think that was a tough time for us, because she wasn't swaddled but still wanted to be warm/snuggled.
Do you have a Rock 'n Play? That thing is the greatest thing ever. It has vibrations if you need them, and the tilt is especially great when your baby is sniffly or has reflux. Plus the sides snuggle them in. PLUS it's super portable; we used it instead of a Pack 'n Play when we went out of town, and we could pick it up and move it from room to room when she was sleeping.
posted by St. Hubbins at 10:00 AM on December 16, 2015
I think part of that was due to feeding, too; when she turned one and went to the toddler room, she had three meals a day plus a snack, at predictable times, and suddenly she was amenable to a two-hour nap from 12-2. Contrast that to feeding her milk or baby food: we would feed her every couple of hours, and then she'd go back to lying around and doing whatever she was doing.
So I hate to say it, having been there myself, but you may just have to wait it out and see how things go. I hear you on being worried about how much rest she's getting, but as long as you give her opportunities to be comfortable, she will take them when she can.
Also, how is she doing with rolling? Is she getting closer to rolling from front to back, or back to front? I think that was a tough time for us, because she wasn't swaddled but still wanted to be warm/snuggled.
Do you have a Rock 'n Play? That thing is the greatest thing ever. It has vibrations if you need them, and the tilt is especially great when your baby is sniffly or has reflux. Plus the sides snuggle them in. PLUS it's super portable; we used it instead of a Pack 'n Play when we went out of town, and we could pick it up and move it from room to room when she was sleeping.
posted by St. Hubbins at 10:00 AM on December 16, 2015
I am just worried she is not getting the naps she needs during the day.
You can decide not to worry about this because cumulatively, she is getting the 14 hours of sleep per day that is the average for a 4-month old: 12 hours + 4 x 30 minutes. Your child is getting a lot of sleep at night whereas infants who nap more frequently during the day time may also be waking and feeding more often at night.
posted by DarlingBri at 10:47 AM on December 16, 2015
You can decide not to worry about this because cumulatively, she is getting the 14 hours of sleep per day that is the average for a 4-month old: 12 hours + 4 x 30 minutes. Your child is getting a lot of sleep at night whereas infants who nap more frequently during the day time may also be waking and feeding more often at night.
posted by DarlingBri at 10:47 AM on December 16, 2015
Don't make this into a monster, either.
My first kid never napped. He never slept more than 8 hours in a 24 hour period. Never, since birth. He still only sleeps 8-9 hours a day, total, at 7yo. He has never been sleep deprived. He has never shown any ill effects of being sleep deprived (e.g. he is ahead of his class academically, doesn't get crabby when tired, etc).
My second kid slept 12's AND napped several times a day. He didn't drop naps until he was 4.5.
So, every kid is different. Every kid will be fine. Let them figure it out.
posted by TinWhistle at 7:41 AM on December 17, 2015
My first kid never napped. He never slept more than 8 hours in a 24 hour period. Never, since birth. He still only sleeps 8-9 hours a day, total, at 7yo. He has never been sleep deprived. He has never shown any ill effects of being sleep deprived (e.g. he is ahead of his class academically, doesn't get crabby when tired, etc).
My second kid slept 12's AND napped several times a day. He didn't drop naps until he was 4.5.
So, every kid is different. Every kid will be fine. Let them figure it out.
posted by TinWhistle at 7:41 AM on December 17, 2015
Oh, and not saying this is you at all, but I discovered when talking with all my mommy friends that most parents worry about naps for selfish reasons (to have alone time and to get things done), but pass it off as bad that baby isn't sleeping 18 hours a day like their cats...
posted by TinWhistle at 7:42 AM on December 17, 2015
posted by TinWhistle at 7:42 AM on December 17, 2015
This thread is closed to new comments.
Congrats on bedtime!
posted by lydhre at 9:33 AM on December 16, 2015