sterling silver ring as a wedding band?
November 13, 2015 8:34 AM Subscribe
I'm getting married soon, and I'm trying to pick out a ring. I really like the idea of a plain, sterling silver wedding band, but I know next to nothing about jewelry. If you work regularly with silver, or have silver jewelry, can you tell me if you think a silver ring would stand up ok to everyday wear? Would it scratch and tarnish quickly?
Here is the emotional logic behind wanting a silver wedding ring: I lived in the American Southwest for 10 years. I am now living in Europe and although I am happy where I am (and I am looking forward to getting married), there is a part of my heart that still misses the Southwest every day. I was 17 when I first moved out there, and I imprinted on the Southwestern landscape like a baby duck imprints on its mother, so I've never loved anywhere else like I love those mountains. Silver smithing and silver jewelry is a big thing in the Southwest, and getting a sterling silver ring would be a symbolic way to carry a bit of my past into my future here an ocean away.
But like I said, I know very little about jewelry and could use some advice. The ring I am thinking about is a lot like this one from an Etsy shop. I like taking care of things, so I don't mind polishing it every once in a while but I don't want a ring that is really high maintenance or one that I have to be super careful with.
So, I guess my basic question is: will a 925 sterling silver ring hold up for long-term, everyday wear? If so, are there things I should look out for while ring shopping (for instance is recycled silver okay)? And what should I do to take care of it once I have it?
Here is the emotional logic behind wanting a silver wedding ring: I lived in the American Southwest for 10 years. I am now living in Europe and although I am happy where I am (and I am looking forward to getting married), there is a part of my heart that still misses the Southwest every day. I was 17 when I first moved out there, and I imprinted on the Southwestern landscape like a baby duck imprints on its mother, so I've never loved anywhere else like I love those mountains. Silver smithing and silver jewelry is a big thing in the Southwest, and getting a sterling silver ring would be a symbolic way to carry a bit of my past into my future here an ocean away.
But like I said, I know very little about jewelry and could use some advice. The ring I am thinking about is a lot like this one from an Etsy shop. I like taking care of things, so I don't mind polishing it every once in a while but I don't want a ring that is really high maintenance or one that I have to be super careful with.
So, I guess my basic question is: will a 925 sterling silver ring hold up for long-term, everyday wear? If so, are there things I should look out for while ring shopping (for instance is recycled silver okay)? And what should I do to take care of it once I have it?
Best answer: My wedding ring is sterling silver, with very fine engraving of the musical notes of "Amazing Grace"; my spouse has the same with Beethoven's "Ode to Joy." We've had them for (I'm guessing) about 8 years (we've been married for 11 but bought the rings later). I wear mine every day, have polished it maybe once, and it's still nice and shiny and the engraving is very clear. I don't really see any scratching.
I think my spouse's has a bit more wear and tear (she doesn't take hers off in the shower or to wash dishes, as I do, and she usually does more "hard" labor like gardening and yard work), but I'd certainly say that she hasn't had a problem with tarnishing at all; maybe a little more smoothing-out of the engraving (but hers was more intricate than mine to begin with).
I don't think you need to worry too much about the one you picked out, because it looks pretty thick and solid. It might show scratches a little more than ours do, but I think the engraving on ours might obscure that. You might want to consider something with a little more texturing from the get-go if the idea of scratches bothers you, but I don't think it's a huge deal.
posted by dlugoczaj at 8:51 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
I think my spouse's has a bit more wear and tear (she doesn't take hers off in the shower or to wash dishes, as I do, and she usually does more "hard" labor like gardening and yard work), but I'd certainly say that she hasn't had a problem with tarnishing at all; maybe a little more smoothing-out of the engraving (but hers was more intricate than mine to begin with).
I don't think you need to worry too much about the one you picked out, because it looks pretty thick and solid. It might show scratches a little more than ours do, but I think the engraving on ours might obscure that. You might want to consider something with a little more texturing from the get-go if the idea of scratches bothers you, but I don't think it's a huge deal.
posted by dlugoczaj at 8:51 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
Best answer: I have a .925 sterling silver ring I wear every day (this one, although my engraving obviously says something different), and it's just fine. I've had it and worn it pretty much every day for about three or four years now.
A caveat, I suppose: as you can see from the description on Etsy, mine is actually deliberately smithed to look kind of weathered, so I don't mind the odd scratch or teeny dent on mine, since it just adds to the general look of the ring anyway. The ring still looks very good, but not pristine, as sterling silver is relatively soft and it does tend to get a bit dinged up. So if you'll want your ring to look perfect after a few years even though you wear it every day, that might be something to keep in mind. Also, I work in an office so I usually don't do any heavy-duty work with my hands (or if I do, I take the ring off).
I use a silver cleaning cloth on mine because I don't want to disturb the oxidation in the engraving, and that works very well to keep the ring clean.
posted by holborne at 8:53 AM on November 13, 2015
A caveat, I suppose: as you can see from the description on Etsy, mine is actually deliberately smithed to look kind of weathered, so I don't mind the odd scratch or teeny dent on mine, since it just adds to the general look of the ring anyway. The ring still looks very good, but not pristine, as sterling silver is relatively soft and it does tend to get a bit dinged up. So if you'll want your ring to look perfect after a few years even though you wear it every day, that might be something to keep in mind. Also, I work in an office so I usually don't do any heavy-duty work with my hands (or if I do, I take the ring off).
I use a silver cleaning cloth on mine because I don't want to disturb the oxidation in the engraving, and that works very well to keep the ring clean.
posted by holborne at 8:53 AM on November 13, 2015
Have you worn sterling silver jewelry in the past? Some people's skin chemistry reacts badly to sterling silver and causes it to tarnish more easily. The same goes for certain types of lotions or soaps.
posted by Diagonalize at 8:55 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by Diagonalize at 8:55 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
Best answer: Can I just say, I'm totally in love with this idea for you. What a beautiful way of combining past and future.
Silver that's sees regular wear tends to avoid tarnish. But I also love the look of mildly tarnished silver. It's a property of the metal, and that's OK. You can shine it up for special occasions.
posted by zennie at 9:11 AM on November 13, 2015
Silver that's sees regular wear tends to avoid tarnish. But I also love the look of mildly tarnished silver. It's a property of the metal, and that's OK. You can shine it up for special occasions.
posted by zennie at 9:11 AM on November 13, 2015
We got sterling silver rings, and my engagement ring is also sterling silver. I've been wearing the engagement ring for a year now and the wedding ring for just over a month. They are not scratched, but the engagement ring got a tiny nick in it from a whitewater rafting incident. It is very tiny and really only I know where it is.
My husband's ring is already scratched to hell and back because he is a drama professor and he was doing warmups in his acting class on a concrete floor.
None of the three rings have tarnished at all.
posted by chainsofreedom at 9:13 AM on November 13, 2015
My husband's ring is already scratched to hell and back because he is a drama professor and he was doing warmups in his acting class on a concrete floor.
None of the three rings have tarnished at all.
posted by chainsofreedom at 9:13 AM on November 13, 2015
Don't wear the ring in certain mineral water spas -- mine turned black, although it was not permanently harmed. Not the most fun surprise.
posted by puddledork at 9:18 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by puddledork at 9:18 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: Silver that you wear every day stays beautiful. If it has deep engraving, that part will darken while the exposed part stays shiny, and that's a very nice look. If it's smooth like the one in your image, it will not tarnish at all.
Be sure to get a ring that's only sterling (like you'd get from a real silversmith); some stuff you find in jewelry stores is rhodium-plated, which doesn't look at all like silver, and will become ugly while the plating wears off.
A purely silver ring can be buffed any time you want it to be shiny again, but the less-shiny finish you get from daily wear is beautiful in its own way.
You should absolutely do this. (I wear a sterling ring every day.)
posted by fritley at 9:21 AM on November 13, 2015
Be sure to get a ring that's only sterling (like you'd get from a real silversmith); some stuff you find in jewelry stores is rhodium-plated, which doesn't look at all like silver, and will become ugly while the plating wears off.
A purely silver ring can be buffed any time you want it to be shiny again, but the less-shiny finish you get from daily wear is beautiful in its own way.
You should absolutely do this. (I wear a sterling ring every day.)
posted by fritley at 9:21 AM on November 13, 2015
In my experience, sterling silver that you wear every day doesn't get particularly tarnished, or rather only gets tarnished in the crevices, which is generally part of the design. It does get a bit scratched-up/dull - if you want a long-lasting mirror-like surface, sterling silver will probably not work for you.
posted by mskyle at 9:22 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by mskyle at 9:22 AM on November 13, 2015
Mine hasn't tarnished, but it does have some wear. I got mine on eBay, used, for 10 bucks. It's smaller than the one you pictured. I'd recommend you just size yourself and pick out a nice used one on eBay. I'm very happy with mine.
posted by Slinga at 9:22 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by Slinga at 9:22 AM on November 13, 2015
Do you swim in a pool? I have a sterling silver miraculous medal that stained after years of swimming.
posted by jgirl at 9:26 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by jgirl at 9:26 AM on November 13, 2015
My ring isn't silver, it's stainless steel, but just a note about scratches/polishes: I love the visible wear on my ring. It was so mirror shiny when I first put it on that I worried about marring it. Years later, it's dinged and scuffed and cratered and it looks incomparably more beautiful than when it was new. I've never worn jewelry before this ring, and I really do love it.
Enjoy your ring, whatever you end up wearing!
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 9:28 AM on November 13, 2015
Enjoy your ring, whatever you end up wearing!
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 9:28 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: I just want to point out that gold (even at lower carats) can get scratched in a similar way to what people are describing here. It is normal for precious metals, and jewelers can do restoration if desired.
posted by zennie at 9:30 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by zennie at 9:30 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
Another silver question! I work in and deal silver.
People are right that tarnish won't be a big issue but it's because, especially on a relatively small daily-wear piece, your own skin oil will protect it from interacting with sulfur in the air and producing tarnish (silver sulfide).
But, if you want it to remain mostly un-patina'd, there is an alloy called nickel silver or sometimes German silver. It's 92.5% silver (sterling percentage), but the rest is nickel instead of cooper (which is what's in regular sterling). It doesn't tarnish and it's harder than sterling, but if you're tuned in to the Southwest silver look, it may not quite work for you as it looks just slightly different than what you would have seen in the Southwest.
posted by cmoj at 9:41 AM on November 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
People are right that tarnish won't be a big issue but it's because, especially on a relatively small daily-wear piece, your own skin oil will protect it from interacting with sulfur in the air and producing tarnish (silver sulfide).
But, if you want it to remain mostly un-patina'd, there is an alloy called nickel silver or sometimes German silver. It's 92.5% silver (sterling percentage), but the rest is nickel instead of cooper (which is what's in regular sterling). It doesn't tarnish and it's harder than sterling, but if you're tuned in to the Southwest silver look, it may not quite work for you as it looks just slightly different than what you would have seen in the Southwest.
posted by cmoj at 9:41 AM on November 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
Best answer: My husband and I have cheap sterling silver wedding bands. We've been married for almost 11 years and the rings are fine -- we wear them all the time. Still not regretting spending our money on the honeymoon instead of the rings!
posted by xeney at 9:41 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by xeney at 9:41 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: Our wedding rings/bands are silver. Mine is pretty scratched up because the only times I'll take it off is if I'm putting my hands in some kind of harsh chemical (bleach, varsol, etc). It is still shiny though and I have never polished it, so I will join in with others that it only tarnishes if it isn't in use. We've had them for 10 years.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 9:55 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 9:55 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: Hub and I have custom silver bands and they're fantastic. Mine doesn't ever really need polishing as I wear it every day and that keeps it tarnish free. I polish it maybe once a year? Not because it needs it, but just because I do it when polishing other tarnished stuff.
I love the color and gleam of silver and didn't want to get a white gold band that I'd have to repeatedly replate as it started yellowing. I don't regret my choice at all. Not one bit.
posted by quince at 9:56 AM on November 13, 2015
I love the color and gleam of silver and didn't want to get a white gold band that I'd have to repeatedly replate as it started yellowing. I don't regret my choice at all. Not one bit.
posted by quince at 9:56 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: I've been wearing a plain sterling silver wedding-type band for the last fifteen years, and although it certainly gets a little scratched with wear, it's never really tarnished or anything.
posted by Blue_thing at 10:25 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by Blue_thing at 10:25 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: Silver has some other advantages. If you gain or lose weight, it's very easy and inexpensive to resize. If it does get a scratch you can't live with you can give it a quick polish with jeweler rouge (which I wouldn't do with white gold).
When I was taking smithing classes I melted down a bunch of sterling silver stuff and recast it. It's all held up for years. Based on my experience I wouldn't worry about recycled/recast stuff as long as its 925.
posted by 26.2 at 10:37 AM on November 13, 2015
When I was taking smithing classes I melted down a bunch of sterling silver stuff and recast it. It's all held up for years. Based on my experience I wouldn't worry about recycled/recast stuff as long as its 925.
posted by 26.2 at 10:37 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: My husband and I have silver bands with mokume gane patterning. His skin chemistry is more caustic than mine is, so the tarnishing pattern between metals is slightly different, but our rings are each shiny with the soft patina of daily wear. We clean them every so often, just like with any other piece of jewelry that gets a lot of skin time. I haven't noticed any particular issues with scratching, and the only time I take mine off is when there's a safety risk or hygiene consideration (like at the gym, or if I'm doing hands-on cooking like pastry).
It sounds like using silver is important to you. Silver is certainly durable enough for use as a ring. Pick the ring you want, and if it gets damaged or lost in the future - well, that's sad, but it could happen with any material.
posted by VelveteenBabbitt at 10:39 AM on November 13, 2015
It sounds like using silver is important to you. Silver is certainly durable enough for use as a ring. Pick the ring you want, and if it gets damaged or lost in the future - well, that's sad, but it could happen with any material.
posted by VelveteenBabbitt at 10:39 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: My husband and I both have silver wedding bands. My looks fine and I wear it daily. I will take it off if I'm going to workout or lots of lifting. My husband's looks fine too, just with a few more small scratches since he has a more physical job than I do. Go for the ring you love!
posted by Attackpanda at 10:45 AM on November 13, 2015
posted by Attackpanda at 10:45 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: I wore a nickle-free stirling silver ring for about 15 years. It didn't scratch or tarnish and always looked really nice. I did have it cleaned twice, but mostly because we were having another ring cleaned at that time. I took it off to sleep or swim or when doing anything using chemicals etc. Then one day it ... fell apart into several pieces. Mine wasn't a solid plain ring, instead it had a very simple design with tiny cutouts in part of it, but it just wore through over time until it broke. So there's that.
My husband also wore a more solid silver ring for over 20 years before he lost it. His was also slowly wearing through and wasn't as strong or thick at the bottom (where it had also been resized) so it probably wouldn't have lasted forever. But these were not short time frames either.
So I think you should go ahead but get a ring that's plain and solid. And may be at peace with the idea that it might not last until you die. But then you may lose it or something else might happen to it anyway and silver is cheap enough that a replacement every 20 years or so isn't a huge deal. So I'd go for it in your situation.
posted by shelleycat at 10:55 AM on November 13, 2015
My husband also wore a more solid silver ring for over 20 years before he lost it. His was also slowly wearing through and wasn't as strong or thick at the bottom (where it had also been resized) so it probably wouldn't have lasted forever. But these were not short time frames either.
So I think you should go ahead but get a ring that's plain and solid. And may be at peace with the idea that it might not last until you die. But then you may lose it or something else might happen to it anyway and silver is cheap enough that a replacement every 20 years or so isn't a huge deal. So I'd go for it in your situation.
posted by shelleycat at 10:55 AM on November 13, 2015
I wear a plain silver band, which was like $15 from Wal-Mart, purchased by my mother because she was disappointed my wife and I didn't have wedding rings (it wasn't important to us). I've had my band on almost constantly for over ten years now, never had it polished or anything, it hasn't stained my finger nor been stained by anything, although it's a bit misshapen from god-knows-what. It has a huge dent in one side that I'm surprised I can't remember the cause. I attribute its constant shine from my hand being put into my pockets, wearing gloves, etc., but it's not mirror-finish, it has a crosshatch of tiny scratches all around it.
Wifey, however, has a bad reaction to pretty much any metal (we haven't tried gold yet) and doesn't wear any wedding ring at all now because her finger turns green, then red, then bloody and painful. So, test it out yourself first, just in case there's an allergy, but I don't think there's any stigma or emotional issues about wearing a silver wedding band.
Also, regarding replacement: I know many people who have never had "The" wedding ring: they replace theirs whenever the whim strikes their fancy. If your silver ring doesn't hold up, just get a new wedding ring.
posted by AzraelBrown at 11:45 AM on November 13, 2015
Wifey, however, has a bad reaction to pretty much any metal (we haven't tried gold yet) and doesn't wear any wedding ring at all now because her finger turns green, then red, then bloody and painful. So, test it out yourself first, just in case there's an allergy, but I don't think there's any stigma or emotional issues about wearing a silver wedding band.
Also, regarding replacement: I know many people who have never had "The" wedding ring: they replace theirs whenever the whim strikes their fancy. If your silver ring doesn't hold up, just get a new wedding ring.
posted by AzraelBrown at 11:45 AM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: Lovely idea! I work in silver as well and I don't want to contradict but the advice that cmoj gives for nickle or German silver is not correct. It does not contain silver- see here
There are some other tarnish resistant alloys such as Argentium silver that you can research if you like but most of the advice you have gotten is good- everyday wear keeps tarnish minimal unless you go to the hot springs!
posted by catrae at 1:22 PM on November 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
There are some other tarnish resistant alloys such as Argentium silver that you can research if you like but most of the advice you have gotten is good- everyday wear keeps tarnish minimal unless you go to the hot springs!
posted by catrae at 1:22 PM on November 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
Best answer: Another person with a silver wedding ring here. Husband and I have been wearing them for 13 years. Extrapolating from the amount of wear they have right now, they will last our whole lives. We got married young and poor and planned to get them remade with a different metal, but now they're ours and nothing else would do. The areas that get touched regularly stay shiny and have the mild scratchiness that shows use and love. I think your idea is lovely.
posted by tchemgrrl at 3:26 PM on November 13, 2015
posted by tchemgrrl at 3:26 PM on November 13, 2015
+1 it will last as long as you use some sense. Mine has some noticeable nicks because I'm not smart enough to always take it off while weightlifting :(
posted by Jacen at 4:24 PM on November 13, 2015
posted by Jacen at 4:24 PM on November 13, 2015
Best answer: If you do a lot of rough work with your hands, you might consider wearing a silver chain as a necklace onto which you can put the ring when necessary. A lot of married construction workers do something like this, so that they can wear their rings while at work without worrying about damaging them. (Also, rings are a safety hazard when using certain types of tools. If this is a consideration for you, make sure the chain is long enough that it can't fall out of your shirt when you lean over something.) Wearing a chain gives you a designated safe place on your body where you can put your ring if you need to take it off for a moment, so that you don't need to worry about forgetting where it is or having it roll away to somewhere inaccessible.
I agree with other posters that sterling silver is a perfectly good choice for a wedding ring. It is not meaningfully softer or more fragile than gold, and the development of a patina over time is a lovely and traditional part of the sterling silver look which could also be seen as symbolic of the deepening complexity and texture of your relationship itself. Over time the brightness and newness of your marriage will fade, shaped by time and events into an even more beautiful fullness of character and depth of love. A very fitting metaphor, if you choose to adopt it.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 8:08 AM on November 14, 2015
I agree with other posters that sterling silver is a perfectly good choice for a wedding ring. It is not meaningfully softer or more fragile than gold, and the development of a patina over time is a lovely and traditional part of the sterling silver look which could also be seen as symbolic of the deepening complexity and texture of your relationship itself. Over time the brightness and newness of your marriage will fade, shaped by time and events into an even more beautiful fullness of character and depth of love. A very fitting metaphor, if you choose to adopt it.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 8:08 AM on November 14, 2015
Response by poster: Thank you all so much for your answers! You've reassured me that I can get the sort of ring I want, and I'm really grateful for that.
posted by colfax at 10:11 AM on November 17, 2015
posted by colfax at 10:11 AM on November 17, 2015
Best answer: I have standard 14k gold rings from a regular jewelry store and one ring got a ding in it and eventually broke in half. My engagement ring got totally misshapen and really thin and the prongs were falling apart so I had the whole setting replaced after about 18 years. So get whatever you want!
posted by artychoke at 5:33 AM on November 19, 2015
posted by artychoke at 5:33 AM on November 19, 2015
This thread is closed to new comments.
I own a decent amount of silver jewelry; in my experience the stuff that I wear regularly stays relatively shiny while the stuff that hangs out in my jewelry box for months on end gets dingy and tarnished.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:50 AM on November 13, 2015 [2 favorites]