Am I crazy or are they purposely ignoring me?
October 16, 2015 6:24 PM Subscribe
I feel insane for even posting about this, but my (ever-so-slight) anxiety is getting the best of me!
Around two months ago, I accepted a job with a great company. It is what they are calling a "W2 contractor" position. So, I'm a W2 employee where they take care of deducting taxes from my paycheck for me, but I don't receive any health benefits, PTO, etc. etc. I'm paid hourly, and my hourly wage is well above the norm, I'm guessing to help offset the lack of benefits. Some weeks I work 40 hours, others I work 15 or so... it depends on the workload available. Essentially, it's kind of like being a part time employee.
Yesterday, I was told my hours for today would likely be a little shorter, just because the workload was a little lower for the end of the week. My supervisor said they'd call/email/or text to let me know what was going on and when I should come in. That same evening, I received an invite to join the team for a little group lunch outing (taking place today), celebrating a big success they recently played part in. I emailed my supervisor to ask if I should come in before that to start on the work that needed done, but I never received a response... In fact, I haven't heard from anyone all day today. I even emailed again this afternoon to make sure I should come in Monday, and I still haven't heard back.
Cue the anxiety... I felt like I was finally starting to fit in with this group, which is extremely tight-knit. There's definitely a learning curve, and while I'm certainly confident in my skills, I'm still learning what each team member wants/likes/etc. Despite this, I felt as though I was doing a good job holding my own, keeping ahead of deadlines and making myself available to help as much as possible. However, after this lack of communication occurred, my paranoia has set in and I feel like they're going to can me, but just don't know how to tell me (they really are nice people!).
I can definitely accept that they are EXTREMELY busy, but could it really hurt to send a quick email back to say yes or no to my question? Am I being totally unreasonable here/are my worries completely unfounded?
This job has no guarantees and I have noticed this company treats its contractors somewhat like second class citizens, but I love what I'm doing there, so I'm trying to make the best of it... Maybe I'm just searching for reassurance on the web so I don't spend my entire weekend fretting about this... heh.
On a side note, I should add I am seeing a therapist to help me cope with my depression/anxiety/lack of confidence/my total social awkwardness. As you can see, I'm still very much a work in progress, so I apologize if this question is off the wall.
Any suggestions on how to deal with the "omg, are they firing me?!" paranoia and even suggestions on succeeding at a new job would be very appreciated. This really is a great opportunity (the best I've had in my field thus far) and I want to do it right. Sorry for the lengthy message and thanks in advance!
The Shmeek
Yesterday, I was told my hours for today would likely be a little shorter, just because the workload was a little lower for the end of the week. My supervisor said they'd call/email/or text to let me know what was going on and when I should come in. That same evening, I received an invite to join the team for a little group lunch outing (taking place today), celebrating a big success they recently played part in. I emailed my supervisor to ask if I should come in before that to start on the work that needed done, but I never received a response... In fact, I haven't heard from anyone all day today. I even emailed again this afternoon to make sure I should come in Monday, and I still haven't heard back.
Cue the anxiety... I felt like I was finally starting to fit in with this group, which is extremely tight-knit. There's definitely a learning curve, and while I'm certainly confident in my skills, I'm still learning what each team member wants/likes/etc. Despite this, I felt as though I was doing a good job holding my own, keeping ahead of deadlines and making myself available to help as much as possible. However, after this lack of communication occurred, my paranoia has set in and I feel like they're going to can me, but just don't know how to tell me (they really are nice people!).
I can definitely accept that they are EXTREMELY busy, but could it really hurt to send a quick email back to say yes or no to my question? Am I being totally unreasonable here/are my worries completely unfounded?
This job has no guarantees and I have noticed this company treats its contractors somewhat like second class citizens, but I love what I'm doing there, so I'm trying to make the best of it... Maybe I'm just searching for reassurance on the web so I don't spend my entire weekend fretting about this... heh.
On a side note, I should add I am seeing a therapist to help me cope with my depression/anxiety/lack of confidence/my total social awkwardness. As you can see, I'm still very much a work in progress, so I apologize if this question is off the wall.
Any suggestions on how to deal with the "omg, are they firing me?!" paranoia and even suggestions on succeeding at a new job would be very appreciated. This really is a great opportunity (the best I've had in my field thus far) and I want to do it right. Sorry for the lengthy message and thanks in advance!
The Shmeek
Respond to the reality, not to the fears or the anxiety you bring into the situation (sort of basic CBT reframing of your thoughts). In other words, it sounds like the work environment is a bit unstable to begin with, so this type of lack of response shouldn't surprise you, relax until you know more.
That said, it doesn't sound like this particular employer's style isn't a good match for you... it's great that you love what you're doing, but you might want to also be looking to find a position with a bit more stability/certainty to it.
Have a great weekend! seriously, that's your job for the next two days...have a great weekend! :)
posted by HuronBob at 8:22 PM on October 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
That said, it doesn't sound like this particular employer's style isn't a good match for you... it's great that you love what you're doing, but you might want to also be looking to find a position with a bit more stability/certainty to it.
Have a great weekend! seriously, that's your job for the next two days...have a great weekend! :)
posted by HuronBob at 8:22 PM on October 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
oops... "doesn't sound like" should have been "sounds like"... in my comment above...
posted by HuronBob at 8:43 PM on October 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by HuronBob at 8:43 PM on October 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
This doesn't sound off the wall but I don't think that what you described here is cause for concern. Your boss probably thought "I'll respond to that later" and then forgot, which happens to me like 5-6 times/week, especially when I'm super-busy.
posted by lunasol at 8:45 PM on October 16, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by lunasol at 8:45 PM on October 16, 2015 [4 favorites]
Response by poster: Thanks for all of your comments!! I woke up yesterday with a fresh look on things and am feeling better. I'm going to walk into work tomorrow morning with a smile! ;) (And if I get sent home due to lack of work available, well, then I'll come home and get stuff done here. hahaha)
posted by theshmeek at 8:47 AM on October 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by theshmeek at 8:47 AM on October 18, 2015 [1 favorite]
This thread is closed to new comments.
On a side note, I should add I am seeing a therapist to help me cope with my depression/anxiety/lack of confidence/my total social awkwardness. As you can see, I'm still very much a work in progress, so I apologize if this question is off the wall.
Not off the wall at all! It's worth noting that a common symptom of anxiety is that we tend to read reality through a lens that distorts things a bit, and it often is not in our own favor. When we realize this, though, it gives us permission not to ruminate until we have more information to make a solid analysis of what is happening. I think in this case, you don't have enough information to interpret others' intentions and to warrant worrying, so give yourself permission to table it until you find out. (If you have to, schedule time to worry about it so that it doesn't have to be on your mind all the time. Really, this works. Say, tomorrow from 3:00-3:30, at which time you think it through at bit more, and then reschedule for another time if needed.)
Good luck to you.
posted by SpacemanStix at 6:32 PM on October 16, 2015 [1 favorite]