Gay corporate "moms" - is this a thing?

October 14, 2015 3:28 PM

I've long noticed a pattern in my industry that women get pushed out (or move out?) of creative roles and into "Mom" roles. The stop being compositors/animators/developers and become production assistants and production coordinators. Pay-wise and career-respect-wise, it's a lot like being the default parent - not much pay, and not much respect. Lately, I've noticed more stereotypically gay men (leaning toward the twink/pup variety) taking on production assistant/coordinator roles. Is this related at all to gender roles and default parenting, or am I noticing trends which do not exist?

I think of these roles as "mom" roles because they take on the emotional and organizational labour of making sure that everyone has what they need, is talking to who they're supposed to be talking to, is getting their homework done, is getting herded to the meetings they need to attend, is doing an occasionally non-work fun thing, is happy with the company's snacks, etc.

posted by clawsoon to Work & Money (6 answers total)

Not sure what industry you work in, but it sounds like you either work in my field (film/TV) or adjacent to it. And, yes, I have not only also noticed this, but I'm a woman on the production coordinator track. Which, in my experience isn't poorly compensated at all, but is very much a "mom" style role of supporting everyone else and putting out fires, and as such is under appreciated and often ill-understood by people outside that role.

I haven't necessarily noticed that more gay men gravitate there, though in my field I do notice that gay men tend to slot into the ghetto of hair, makeup, wardrobe, and sometimes the art department. I have worked with a lot of gay male costume supervisors and art department coordinators, which is also a "department mom" role, but then I'm not sure if it's because Department Mom attracts women/gay men, or if it's simply because gay men end up in those departments more and thus end up in support roles within same.

I've certainly known straight male production coordinators, wardrobe supervisors, art directors, etc. so this is also something that may be confirmation bias to a degree.

I absolutely don't think parenting style or gender roles has much if anything to do with it. If anything, I think it has more to do with things like mentorship and what expectations people in supervising roles have based on people's gender identity and sexual orientation. When you're a female PA, you are more often pushed toward the production office rather than set, and then once you get to the production office, you are given more office work tasks and fewer runs. After a year or so as a PA, when it's time to figure out what you really want to do in the industry, you are much more likely to be promoted up the Production Coordinator ladder. I have no idea if this is also true for gay men, though, again, they do seem to be subjected to the same "I know what would be a good career for you" ghettoization as women. But just for slightly different roles?
posted by Sara C. at 3:48 PM on October 14, 2015 [2 favorites]

I am in the tech industry in Silicon Valley and used to be in the gaming industry. I am a straight woman.

I used to be an individual contributor (artist/graphic designer) and I am now a "mom"-type role- I do program management for design.

I made the change because doing so allowed me to finally start making enough money to live on my own in the Bay Area.
posted by raw sugar at 4:21 PM on October 14, 2015 [1 favorite]

I also work in show biz, and I don't know people who were working animators/developers who then become PAs. Some women decide they'd rather work office hours than production hours, and so move into production manager/coordinator/post-supervisor roles. I've worked with gay producers who were very concerned about the morale of the crew and I've worked with others who didn't give a flip about anything but budget and deadline.
Emotional labor isn't the same as tasks like arranging craft services or crew parking or production meetings or office snacks. Getting everyone to sign a card for the editor whose dog died might not be in your job description, but honestly--who would balk at doing this?
I work on a production now with a PA who will be a huge success because he buys the best snacks ever. A crew, like an army, travels on its stomach.
posted by Ideefixe at 6:03 PM on October 14, 2015 [1 favorite]

What you're noticing is the gender-based division of emotional labor In the workplace.
posted by ottereroticist at 6:06 PM on October 14, 2015 [1 favorite]

Not to belabor this, but rounding up office snacks, meetings, crew lunch and production meetings are not emotional labor. These are organizational tasks. Talking your lead actor out of the trailer because you're losing the light and he/she hates his/ her hair is emotional labor and is performed by someone who is much higher in the organization than a PA.
posted by Ideefixe at 7:12 PM on October 14, 2015 [6 favorites]

Not the same field, but my perception is that in academia the administrative roles assigned to the academic staff do sometimes seem to fall along gender-stereotype-based lines. And these roles are, indeed, "assigned" (in that the HoD will approach a certain member of academic staff to take on activity X: and you are strongly pressured to say "yes" to this request). 'Activity X' for the female members of academic staff (in my experience) are more likely to involve the caring-type roles that relate to student progression/activity (director of studies, teaching coordinator, etc.), whereas 'Activity X' requested of the male members of academic staff are more likely to involve roles that have little (if anything) to do with tending to students and, instead, are more closely related to allocation of funds and coordinating research-related activities. And I don't think it is inaccurate to say that, in general, dealing with money/research is a more high-status activity than is dealing with students.
posted by Halo in reverse at 12:17 AM on October 15, 2015 [3 favorites]