How to be a great live-in landlord?
September 15, 2015 8:54 AM Subscribe
My partner and I own a house in a small Ohio city, and want to rent out a couple of the extra bedrooms -- we've already got a potential housemate interested in moving in at the end of the month. How can I make sure this goes smoothly for everyone?
Where should I be extra careful of the line between landlord and housemate? What stuff should I get on paper and what sort of thing seems passive aggressive when put in writing? I've looked at being-a-landlord AskMe's, but I'd like to hear advice about what you wish your live-in landlord had done, or what you wish you'd known as a live-in landlord.
Where should I be extra careful of the line between landlord and housemate? What stuff should I get on paper and what sort of thing seems passive aggressive when put in writing? I've looked at being-a-landlord AskMe's, but I'd like to hear advice about what you wish your live-in landlord had done, or what you wish you'd known as a live-in landlord.
I would look at threads about roommates specifically, since that is closer to what you need (for example, http://ask.metafilter.com/212138/What-should-roommates-agree-to-in-writing-beyond-the-lease).
But I would reference the following specifically in the lease: utilities, payment/eviction issues, quiet hours, pets, overnight visitors, illegal drugs, specifying any areas that are not "common", an emergency contact, damage & repairs in case of negligence. Basically anything that might involve a significant amount of money or that you might need when evicting someone.
posted by veery at 9:30 AM on September 15, 2015
But I would reference the following specifically in the lease: utilities, payment/eviction issues, quiet hours, pets, overnight visitors, illegal drugs, specifying any areas that are not "common", an emergency contact, damage & repairs in case of negligence. Basically anything that might involve a significant amount of money or that you might need when evicting someone.
posted by veery at 9:30 AM on September 15, 2015
As a friend of mine once put it, "Your roommate can be your best friend, but your best friend can't be your roommate." So if that interested tenant-to-be is someone you already know and like, be very careful about moving them into your home and having to deal with them as a cohabitant and as a person who will owe your money and expect services in return.
posted by Etrigan at 9:38 AM on September 15, 2015 [3 favorites]
posted by Etrigan at 9:38 AM on September 15, 2015 [3 favorites]
I absolutely had them sign a lease and I made it a month to month lease. That way if either party wanted out of the arrangement for any reason, they can get out. I figure if my tenant wasn't happy, I wouldn't be happy and vice versa. So giving each other an out IN WRITING is critical from my point of view.
posted by murrey at 9:50 AM on September 15, 2015
posted by murrey at 9:50 AM on September 15, 2015
Best answer: Based on super limited experience watching friends navigate this dynamic, I'd add that you should be very conscientious about what you promise, in terms of whose home it is.
Even if you imagine that you're going to be all equitable and whatnot, keep that to yourself. Make sure that when you're talking to prospective housemates you're super clear about the power dynamic. That this is your house and you certainly want to be fair and reasonable but in the end you make the rules.
One friend lived with an owner-housemate who had pitched the living arrangement as a communal home with shared decision making, but when it came down to it, he wasn't willing to yield on things that everyone disagreed with him about. That would have been much less frustrating for everyone involved if they hadn't gone into it with the idea that they'd be making decisions together in house meetings.
Another friend lived with an owner-housemate who decided to put in a deck and BBQ grill and then just billed everyone for their share of the cost of it. It was a major home improvement with lasting value and it was not something that the house had decided together to put in, but it turned into a big fight. My friend there ... his living space was actually markedly worse as a result of the deck (he lived below it. Buh-bye light.) and he still had to argue about the fee. So keep that in mind, too: if you want to put in a deck, don't expect your tenants to pitch in for an even share of it. And make sure that any shared/common expenses are discussed and agreed on before anyone spends money.
posted by amandabee at 9:53 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
Even if you imagine that you're going to be all equitable and whatnot, keep that to yourself. Make sure that when you're talking to prospective housemates you're super clear about the power dynamic. That this is your house and you certainly want to be fair and reasonable but in the end you make the rules.
One friend lived with an owner-housemate who had pitched the living arrangement as a communal home with shared decision making, but when it came down to it, he wasn't willing to yield on things that everyone disagreed with him about. That would have been much less frustrating for everyone involved if they hadn't gone into it with the idea that they'd be making decisions together in house meetings.
Another friend lived with an owner-housemate who decided to put in a deck and BBQ grill and then just billed everyone for their share of the cost of it. It was a major home improvement with lasting value and it was not something that the house had decided together to put in, but it turned into a big fight. My friend there ... his living space was actually markedly worse as a result of the deck (he lived below it. Buh-bye light.) and he still had to argue about the fee. So keep that in mind, too: if you want to put in a deck, don't expect your tenants to pitch in for an even share of it. And make sure that any shared/common expenses are discussed and agreed on before anyone spends money.
posted by amandabee at 9:53 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
Try to separate your landlord persona from your roommate persona. Nobody is comfortable with a landlord hanging over their shoulder telling them they're doing everything wrong, so your best bet is to try not to see it. Standard lease situation is that whatever they wreck during the year, they have to pay to get fixed when they leave, so you have to trust that, take a deep breath, and let the year play out. It doesn't matter if they nick the walls with the laundry basket, you'll spackle and paint after they leave. If you don't think you can avoid keeping a running tally of how many times they've scuffed their bike tire into the hallway door, then maybe the live-in landlord thing is not for you - it's not how many times they do it per day, it's whether you can fix the sum total at the end of the year.
posted by aimedwander at 10:15 AM on September 15, 2015
posted by aimedwander at 10:15 AM on September 15, 2015
Cleaning service.
Yes a thousand times. Just tell any/every person that moves "the person who does the cleaning comes in on (whatever days), what tasks that person does and DOES NOT do, and what the expectations are for payment/readiness." Do not let the roommate opt out of paying for this service. And do not let the roommate barter for cheaper rent by way of their performing the cleaning duties.
posted by bilabial at 10:53 AM on September 15, 2015 [6 favorites]
Yes a thousand times. Just tell any/every person that moves "the person who does the cleaning comes in on (whatever days), what tasks that person does and DOES NOT do, and what the expectations are for payment/readiness." Do not let the roommate opt out of paying for this service. And do not let the roommate barter for cheaper rent by way of their performing the cleaning duties.
posted by bilabial at 10:53 AM on September 15, 2015 [6 favorites]
You need to think carefully about what you want out of this situation. Are you simply renting rooms with kitchen privileges? Or are you trying to build a "shared house"?
With the "renting rooms" type arrangement, you'll want to think most carefully about three things:
- Shared use of the bathrooms
- Shared use of the kitchen
- Shared use of the common areas.
For bathrooms, in my experience, the best solution is that folks tote in/tote out their stuff (towels, shower stuff, like in a dorm) and that you simply buy toilet paper as an overhead expense (ie: built into their rent) and hire a cleaning service specifically to clean the bathroom weekly (again, an expense that is part of their rent and agreed up front) and you're done.
For the kitchen, you'll need to think about things like private and/or lockable areas where people can store food (and potentially pots and pans and dishes - this includes your stuff as well) and a *stringent* system for labeling things in the 'fridge. It also should include rules for kitchen use (basically, clean up after yourself; kitchen should be clean within one hour of finishing food NO EXCEPTIONS) that tenants sign and that are also posted somewhere clearly as a reminder to all.
If your goal is for shared housing, then you're going to screen the tenants differently and also your rules can be different. There can be things like cleaning schedules and discussions about fair use of the kitchen and kitchen supplies. HOWEVER, this also means that you're agreeing to let this be a communal discussion, and that you're not going to dictate rules to strictly. If you're going this route, I'd suggest formally or informally instituting "family dinner" where people both cook and eat communally at least once a week, as well as work toward other family-style activities (movie night, game night, whatever). But you need to select tenants who are good with this style of living up front.
posted by anastasiav at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
With the "renting rooms" type arrangement, you'll want to think most carefully about three things:
- Shared use of the bathrooms
- Shared use of the kitchen
- Shared use of the common areas.
For bathrooms, in my experience, the best solution is that folks tote in/tote out their stuff (towels, shower stuff, like in a dorm) and that you simply buy toilet paper as an overhead expense (ie: built into their rent) and hire a cleaning service specifically to clean the bathroom weekly (again, an expense that is part of their rent and agreed up front) and you're done.
For the kitchen, you'll need to think about things like private and/or lockable areas where people can store food (and potentially pots and pans and dishes - this includes your stuff as well) and a *stringent* system for labeling things in the 'fridge. It also should include rules for kitchen use (basically, clean up after yourself; kitchen should be clean within one hour of finishing food NO EXCEPTIONS) that tenants sign and that are also posted somewhere clearly as a reminder to all.
If your goal is for shared housing, then you're going to screen the tenants differently and also your rules can be different. There can be things like cleaning schedules and discussions about fair use of the kitchen and kitchen supplies. HOWEVER, this also means that you're agreeing to let this be a communal discussion, and that you're not going to dictate rules to strictly. If you're going this route, I'd suggest formally or informally instituting "family dinner" where people both cook and eat communally at least once a week, as well as work toward other family-style activities (movie night, game night, whatever). But you need to select tenants who are good with this style of living up front.
posted by anastasiav at 11:02 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
Best answer: Assume nothing. Make sure you and the tenant are on the same page for every significant issue. People make assumptions about how to behave based on their past experiences; those past experiences could be wildly different from yours.
posted by JackBurden at 11:19 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by JackBurden at 11:19 AM on September 15, 2015 [1 favorite]
Best answer: You will be an absolute pain to live with if you insist on a "live-in landlord" situation. You will in effect be housemates, and you should treat the relationship as such. No one will want to live somewhere where they have the feeling the "landlord" is breathing down their neck 24/7. If you go forth, accept that you will have to compromise, and put up with people not treating your things as you might want, but this is the price that comes with opening up your house to others.
posted by ryanbryan at 5:34 AM on September 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by ryanbryan at 5:34 AM on September 16, 2015 [1 favorite]
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This also goes for utilities if you are planning on including them as part of the rent. Do you really want to get into fights about the thermostat? Splitting bills does help keep the other person accountable for the total cost, but I found it does take up some of your time (calculating the costs, sending them invoices, etc.) to the point where it might not be worth it.
Also, cleaning in general is a big issue. I would follow the advice in other threads and split the cost of a cleaning person rather than get in fights.
posted by unannihilated at 9:07 AM on September 15, 2015 [3 favorites]