Help me dress for my son's wedding
June 11, 2015 7:44 PM   Subscribe

I want to look stylish and elegant. Difficulty: 5 feet tall, plus-size 20-22, with 1 and 1/2 breasts.

My son is getting married in October, the first my two children to do so, and apart from my own wedding 36 years ago, I've never had a "role" in a wedding. The wedding will be in Canada, in October, and in the morning, so I'd prefer to wear a knee-length dress. I'm a breast cancer survivor and don't wear a prosthesis, so a close-fitted bodice just won't fit well. I'm also apple-shaped, if you think of that as "beach ball on popsicle sticks". Thankfully, my legs are well-toned. I am grey/silver haired.

The bridesmaids are wearing royal purple (thinking of the inevitable group pictures) and I was thinking of trying to find something in a grey or silver. But the standard jacket and dress mother-of-the bride/groom combo seems frumpy to me.

Do you have any ideas? I'm in a major Canadian city and don't mind ordering online, either.
posted by angiep to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (8 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
Best answer: This one isn't really a go-er because of the colour but what about a fancy daytime pants suit paired with a fascinator?
posted by DarlingBri at 8:37 PM on June 11, 2015 [4 favorites]

Best answer: Hello from a fellow apple! Let those legs shine. I can't speak to your personal style or tolerance for lace/glitter/tiered skirts/foundation garments--I'm also not sure how comfortable you are with a close-fitted bust, so long as it fits--but here's what I look for:

- V- or scoop-neck (elongate frame, accent throat, shoulders)
- Waist detail (banding, shirring, seam)
- Sleeve elbow-length or longer (3/4 sleeve is my jam)
- Hemline just below the knee

A jacket can look very elegant, IMO, as long as the body is tailored and the sleeve is elbow-length or longer.

No-jacket looks: pastel purple stretch bodice | lace bodice with shawl

Jacket looks: lacy sleeve | another lacy sleeve

Hope this helps. No matter what, good luck, dig deep, and this October, knock 'em dead!
posted by AteYourLembas at 8:43 PM on June 11, 2015 [3 favorites]

This dress in grey would be lovely. The flowy fabric around the bodice will hide major differences in breast size and it isn't the usual mother of bride/groom style, but still looks wedding-ey. I'm not in Canada, so I can't be sure if it's available there.
posted by quince at 8:44 PM on June 11, 2015 [9 favorites]

(I really like that lacy sleeve look AteYourLembas linked to!)

What about this dress from JCPenney? The model looks a bit apple shaped and the jacket helps cover any breast size differences.

This dress from looks like it might work really well for you, too, although it is longer than you specified.

This dress from ModCloth is really quite lovely, too! Pair it with a shawl or scarf if needed.

A more flow-y dress could be this one.

Not gray or silver, but muted, silvery pastels are what this dress comes in. (The "heirloom lilac" might work really well with the purple theme.)

And this pink and gray lace one with the swirly skirt would really play off those legs of your well!
posted by jillithd at 6:45 AM on June 12, 2015 [1 favorite]

My mother wore something very similar to this dress or this dress for my sibling's wedding. Although it was not traditional mother of the bride/groom, she got a lot of compliments and was more comfortable in it than in the more formal dresses she had tried on. The dress itself was also comfortable in material/weight, and skimmed over the parts of her "apple" body that she was self-conscious about. I don't think it drew much attention to the chest area. I think the sizing may have run a bit big, but I can't recall for sure. (Also, and I may be biased, but I actually think it looked better on my mother than it does in the pictures on the website.)

Good luck and congratulations!
posted by Caz721 at 7:01 AM on June 12, 2015 [3 favorites]

Something like this?

Or maybe a wrap top like this?
posted by dpx.mfx at 8:52 AM on June 12, 2015

Are you near Calgary? Nordstrom's just opened a store there! I haven't been to one in Canada but they are known for having good customer service. I'd go in now, and keep going in every few weeks to try things on. I bet you'll come across something that works well!
posted by barnone at 10:32 AM on June 12, 2015

Response by poster: Thanks all for your help. I marked only a couple of best answers, but every answer gave me some ideas. I'm not sure I could pull off the jacket and pantsuit suggested by DarlingBri but I'll be on the lookout. The deep v-necks that were in most answers is not something I would have tried, but I'll give them a shot--I may well be surprised! And I'm in Calgary and had thought of paying a visit to Nordstroms. You've convinced me!
posted by angiep at 12:27 PM on June 12, 2015 [1 favorite]

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