What to do with my not-so-great performance review
June 5, 2015 2:29 PM Subscribe
I had a not-so-great performance review. There are some snowflake details. What should I do?
I have been working for 8 years at a small private school teaching a special subject. I have overall liked the work, but there were some problems; I always knew I would not be there forever, but now that the fork in the road is here, I am not sure what to do.
I will try to keep this brief, but basically, at my year-end review today, she told me that my situation next year is going to be different. A parent survey indicated that the school needs a different direction for my subject specialty. She is not blaming me. She knows I do a good job, and maybe it is just that there are some unrealistic parent expectations and maybe it is just one of those things (none of the reasons she gave were terribly specific). But that's it.
With that said, given how long I have been there, she does not want me to think she doesn't want me. She is prepared to offer me a contract for next year teaching instead a mix of Subject B and Subject C. I have qualifications in both of these areas (although not as extensively as I do in the one I am teaching now) but as they are not subjects for which she normally has a dedicated teacher, I should understand that this will only be for next year.
Now, some snowflake details:
- I am getting married in October, and husband and I have talked about both moving to a different area (perhaps closer to his work) and having a baby. She knows about the baby thing because I had to take two afternoons off to attend appointments for it due to a husband medical issue which will require intervention for this. She strongly implied during the meeting that if I did get pregnant halfway through the year and want to leave, that would be fantastic, and she also told me that if I need to go to any appointments during this next year while working for her, that is totally fine
- I am a little bit reluctant therefore to try to get a new job teaching my current speciality and turn down her offer. I don't want to get a new job elsewhere and then get pregnant and not qualify for benefits. Also, knowing that she is quite willing to be flexible on this, it might be best to stay put for the year she is giving me, do my best to make the baby thing happen, and then during my mat leave, volunteer at a better school to get my foot in the door and go back to work after.
- I also do not currently have a driver's license. It was my plan to get this over the summer. It might be better to stay put for the year she is giving me, get the driving done (it is graduated licensing here so I will need husband in the car with me for at least eight months) and then move closer to his work and get a job up there. Where he works, we could live in a better place for less money BUT it is a suburb and I will need a car, so waiting a year to do that (move and get a job up there) is a better plan than trying to get a job up there now.
- I have some side projects going on right now which are not profitable yet but could be later. Taking her up on her year of time will give me a chance to see if I could make them viable. On the other hand, maybe I cannot make them viable and I am just prolonging the inevitable by taking the extra year she is offering me?
Other detail is, I did ask about references. She said that of course she would give me a good one, she does really like me. But it would be an honest one too if I was applying for another job teaching what I am teaching now. She said she is good at finessing those, but if she is asked why I spent eight years doing X and ended up doing Y, she will have to say something. I am not sure how worried about this I should be going forward.
Sorry for the wall of text! Any perspective on this?
I have been working for 8 years at a small private school teaching a special subject. I have overall liked the work, but there were some problems; I always knew I would not be there forever, but now that the fork in the road is here, I am not sure what to do.
I will try to keep this brief, but basically, at my year-end review today, she told me that my situation next year is going to be different. A parent survey indicated that the school needs a different direction for my subject specialty. She is not blaming me. She knows I do a good job, and maybe it is just that there are some unrealistic parent expectations and maybe it is just one of those things (none of the reasons she gave were terribly specific). But that's it.
With that said, given how long I have been there, she does not want me to think she doesn't want me. She is prepared to offer me a contract for next year teaching instead a mix of Subject B and Subject C. I have qualifications in both of these areas (although not as extensively as I do in the one I am teaching now) but as they are not subjects for which she normally has a dedicated teacher, I should understand that this will only be for next year.
Now, some snowflake details:
- I am getting married in October, and husband and I have talked about both moving to a different area (perhaps closer to his work) and having a baby. She knows about the baby thing because I had to take two afternoons off to attend appointments for it due to a husband medical issue which will require intervention for this. She strongly implied during the meeting that if I did get pregnant halfway through the year and want to leave, that would be fantastic, and she also told me that if I need to go to any appointments during this next year while working for her, that is totally fine
- I am a little bit reluctant therefore to try to get a new job teaching my current speciality and turn down her offer. I don't want to get a new job elsewhere and then get pregnant and not qualify for benefits. Also, knowing that she is quite willing to be flexible on this, it might be best to stay put for the year she is giving me, do my best to make the baby thing happen, and then during my mat leave, volunteer at a better school to get my foot in the door and go back to work after.
- I also do not currently have a driver's license. It was my plan to get this over the summer. It might be better to stay put for the year she is giving me, get the driving done (it is graduated licensing here so I will need husband in the car with me for at least eight months) and then move closer to his work and get a job up there. Where he works, we could live in a better place for less money BUT it is a suburb and I will need a car, so waiting a year to do that (move and get a job up there) is a better plan than trying to get a job up there now.
- I have some side projects going on right now which are not profitable yet but could be later. Taking her up on her year of time will give me a chance to see if I could make them viable. On the other hand, maybe I cannot make them viable and I am just prolonging the inevitable by taking the extra year she is offering me?
Other detail is, I did ask about references. She said that of course she would give me a good one, she does really like me. But it would be an honest one too if I was applying for another job teaching what I am teaching now. She said she is good at finessing those, but if she is asked why I spent eight years doing X and ended up doing Y, she will have to say something. I am not sure how worried about this I should be going forward.
Sorry for the wall of text! Any perspective on this?
...what are the drawbacks?
posted by peachfuzz at 2:58 PM on June 5, 2015 [4 favorites]
posted by peachfuzz at 2:58 PM on June 5, 2015 [4 favorites]
Future employers are really only legally allowed to ask if you were employed there and for what dates. If you want a recommendation, write one up and have you boss sign off on it. You don't have to mention the changing expectations for your subject (which seem to largely be in the hands of the parents and not your boss, if I'm reading this correctly).
posted by ananci at 3:23 PM on June 5, 2015
posted by ananci at 3:23 PM on June 5, 2015
Future employers are really only legally allowed to ask if you were employed there and for what dates.
Just to be really clear, this is *not true* in any jurisdiction I'm familiar with. Many companies have that policy, to shield them from possible liability, but there's no law I know of that prevents the hiring company from asking for - or getting - detailed recommendations. If your boss is willing to give you a positive rec, by all means let her.
That said, it sounds like an extra year, even doing less-than-ideal work, is a very good fit for your current circumstances and I don't see a reason not to take it. Side projects that may be unprofitable are a perfect fit for when you get let go involuntarily and need a resume-hole-patcher (ask me how I know!) but if you're planning on moving/having a kid, they're not what you want to be relying on.
posted by restless_nomad at 3:40 PM on June 5, 2015 [10 favorites]
Just to be really clear, this is *not true* in any jurisdiction I'm familiar with. Many companies have that policy, to shield them from possible liability, but there's no law I know of that prevents the hiring company from asking for - or getting - detailed recommendations. If your boss is willing to give you a positive rec, by all means let her.
That said, it sounds like an extra year, even doing less-than-ideal work, is a very good fit for your current circumstances and I don't see a reason not to take it. Side projects that may be unprofitable are a perfect fit for when you get let go involuntarily and need a resume-hole-patcher (ask me how I know!) but if you're planning on moving/having a kid, they're not what you want to be relying on.
posted by restless_nomad at 3:40 PM on June 5, 2015 [10 favorites]
Future employers are really only legally allowed to ask if you were employed there and for what dates
Just so this isn't out here... this isn't even remotely true. And while some companies have an internal policy of only giving that information in recommendations, they are, as a general rule, legally allowed to say whatever they want about you as long as it's true (with a very short list of stuff about protected classes in a more gray area)
posted by brainmouse at 3:41 PM on June 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
Just so this isn't out here... this isn't even remotely true. And while some companies have an internal policy of only giving that information in recommendations, they are, as a general rule, legally allowed to say whatever they want about you as long as it's true (with a very short list of stuff about protected classes in a more gray area)
posted by brainmouse at 3:41 PM on June 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
I wouldn't worry about the letter of recommendation. Private schools are beholden to their parents even more than public schools and non-optimal decisions are made. Switch specialties, get married, work on the baby, and look for another school when you are ready. There are no downsides to accepting her offer gracefully; she seems to have offered it sincerely hoping everything works out.
posted by saucysault at 4:22 PM on June 5, 2015
posted by saucysault at 4:22 PM on June 5, 2015
Response by poster: The drawbacks would be that if I don't get pregnant, I have invested an extra year into a sinking ship situation, and that I will spend the whole year in limbo and terrified to spend any money and enjoy myself because I know my job is not secure. And there was a little of that tonight when I told my fiance, to be honest. I wouldn't want to have a whole year of it. I think (hope) we can deal with it, but it is scary to know that my job is going to end on a fixed date.
posted by JoannaC at 6:01 PM on June 5, 2015
posted by JoannaC at 6:01 PM on June 5, 2015
Best answer: I find it strange that you were not given an opportunity to improve the way you are offering your subject speciality. Did you receive any of this feedback before? It sounds to me as though she likes you personally (you've been there a long time, etc.), and that because of that you're being given the additional year as a kind of way for you to transition to a new job.
I found this strange, however: "Other detail is, I did ask about references. She said that of course she would give me a good one, she does really like me. But it would be an honest one too if I was applying for another job teaching what I am teaching now. She said she is good at finessing those, but if she is asked why I spent eight years doing X and ended up doing Y, she will have to say something. I am not sure how worried about this I should be going forward."
This is a little bit of a red flag for me. I would never feel the need to say this to a departing coworker about their reference (I don't work in eduction, maybe it's normal there?). It reads like her covering her ass for some reason. There's a cynical part of me which wonders how they do in general with teachers openly trying to get pregnant, but I guess that's neither here nor there.
In any case, working out the year sounds like a good option. From a cv perspective, it also takes away any idea that you were fired for non-performance, regardless of what she says in any reference discussion.
posted by frumiousb at 7:01 PM on June 5, 2015 [2 favorites]
I found this strange, however: "Other detail is, I did ask about references. She said that of course she would give me a good one, she does really like me. But it would be an honest one too if I was applying for another job teaching what I am teaching now. She said she is good at finessing those, but if she is asked why I spent eight years doing X and ended up doing Y, she will have to say something. I am not sure how worried about this I should be going forward."
This is a little bit of a red flag for me. I would never feel the need to say this to a departing coworker about their reference (I don't work in eduction, maybe it's normal there?). It reads like her covering her ass for some reason. There's a cynical part of me which wonders how they do in general with teachers openly trying to get pregnant, but I guess that's neither here nor there.
In any case, working out the year sounds like a good option. From a cv perspective, it also takes away any idea that you were fired for non-performance, regardless of what she says in any reference discussion.
posted by frumiousb at 7:01 PM on June 5, 2015 [2 favorites]
This is how I read what you're describing:
Yes, she is telling you to find someone else to give your reference. It is absolutely not true anywhere I know either that myth about only being legal to confirm dates, etc. Many companies have that policy to prevent people from accidentally getting themselves in trouble with unsupportable factual allegations, or to avoid nuisance litigation over references, but opinion and documented fact is perfectly legal.
She is also telling you by not giving you any specific feedback that it is a done deal, there is nothing you can do about it, and they don't want you to try.
It sounds very strongly to me like she's telling you to start looking for another job, but that you won't be let go until you find one.
posted by ctmf at 9:16 PM on June 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
Yes, she is telling you to find someone else to give your reference. It is absolutely not true anywhere I know either that myth about only being legal to confirm dates, etc. Many companies have that policy to prevent people from accidentally getting themselves in trouble with unsupportable factual allegations, or to avoid nuisance litigation over references, but opinion and documented fact is perfectly legal.
She is also telling you by not giving you any specific feedback that it is a done deal, there is nothing you can do about it, and they don't want you to try.
It sounds very strongly to me like she's telling you to start looking for another job, but that you won't be let go until you find one.
posted by ctmf at 9:16 PM on June 5, 2015 [3 favorites]
This thread is closed to new comments.
Is there some reason you can't learn to teach the new stuff? Take a class or something to update you, and then when you're interviewing for your new job and it somehow comes back from your boss that she's letting you go because your knowledge was insufficient, you can say that you've taken care of that.
posted by royalsong at 2:38 PM on June 5, 2015