28 weeks - Help me get through the rest of my high risk pregnacy
April 13, 2015 7:10 AM Subscribe
I'm dealing with some health issues while being pregnant, and I just don't know how I'm going to get through the rest of it!
I know other pregnant ladies have asked similar questions, but I'm overwhelmed and could use any support or words of encouragement.
I'm 28 weeks pregnant with my first baby, and actually feel physically really pretty well, but I have what the docs believe is severe chronic hypertension. I didn't know my numbers before I had my first appointment at 9 weeks, (and I'd never been diagnosed with hypertension) but it was so high that first visit (around 170/90) they are pretty sure it was pre-existing, especially because I have not had other symptoms. For the first few months, a fairly low dose of procardia was working fine, getting my numbers down into the low 140's/70-80, and the docs seemed pleased - they actually didn't want me to go too low and bottom out the bottom number, which can cause the placenta to not work properly- but then bam, it hit 170 and higher again around week 22 and they've been treating it aggressively with new meds ever since. I've seen docs almost every week &switched to a high-risk clinic. At first the numbers dropped again, but have since started creeping back up (even though I'm on a lot of meds) which they are very concerned about. They are already fairly certain I won't go full term, and will want to induce by 39 weeks, if that. I honestly feel like it could be sooner.
This past week I spent a night in the hospital getting a 24 hour urine test, labs, ultrasound, blood work etc etc. For now, they have ruled out pre-eclampsia, though I am going to be monitored quite frequently (ALL THE TIME) for the rest of the pregnancy, and I'm scared shitless this may mean an even early delivery, more and longer hospital stays, worsening BP readings, effects to me and the baby, lots more medications and IVs, or other things I don't know and am not in control of. The docs honestly seem a bit perplexed why someone so young (I'm 33) and otherwise in good health would have such high blood pressure, but it's hard to get to the bottom of it while I'm pregnant. Anyway, I get SOOOO anxious now every time I'm at the doc,it's painful to go and have to see the numbers, and have no idea what's going to happen (if I'm going to have to go back to the hospital, go on bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy, or just in general how to do or anticipate anything for the rest of this pregnancy!!) The nurses and nurse practitioner I saw last week were fairly certain my anxiety had a least some part in my high BP readings, and even suggested taking Zoloft- though I still feel uncertain. (At the pharmacy, the pharmacists suggested taking Zoloft in the last trimester was NOT a good idea? and that I should really speak to my OB again. Great.)
I do feel like I'm getting good treatment, and in good hands with the high-risk OBs.. The baby is doing well, and does not appear to have been affected by this situation at all- she is growing well, and moving a lot, and heart beat is perfect. And I feel so thankful I'm not sick, have an amazing partner who has been seeing my through every step of this. We have lots of family and friends around, and I'm getting a doula.
I feel super anxious about money, but trying not to freak out. I will probably be eligible for Medicaid (and we have decent health insurance) if I have to do a long hospital stay- but still, I'm scared how we're going to deal with all this, both logistically and emotionally. We don't have a lot of money, though enough to get by for 6-8 months (my husband works, I'm still working part-time for now, and we have some savings.)
Ah, I just don't know how to handle all the unknowns in my head right now, while also, just dealing with the "regular" stuff to do to get ready for the baby... Of course, all I want is a healthy me and healthy baby, but I also want to stay sane, feel good about myself,& not spiral every day into the worst case scenario.
Of course, trying to do A LOT of self-care: lots of relaxing, baths, walking, being outside, eating well, asking for help/support, not taking on any more that I can.
Any advice/encouragement/stories of your own health crisis/pregnancy that turned out well, things that helped if you were in the hospital, coping strategies would be so helpful right now!
I know other pregnant ladies have asked similar questions, but I'm overwhelmed and could use any support or words of encouragement.
I'm 28 weeks pregnant with my first baby, and actually feel physically really pretty well, but I have what the docs believe is severe chronic hypertension. I didn't know my numbers before I had my first appointment at 9 weeks, (and I'd never been diagnosed with hypertension) but it was so high that first visit (around 170/90) they are pretty sure it was pre-existing, especially because I have not had other symptoms. For the first few months, a fairly low dose of procardia was working fine, getting my numbers down into the low 140's/70-80, and the docs seemed pleased - they actually didn't want me to go too low and bottom out the bottom number, which can cause the placenta to not work properly- but then bam, it hit 170 and higher again around week 22 and they've been treating it aggressively with new meds ever since. I've seen docs almost every week &switched to a high-risk clinic. At first the numbers dropped again, but have since started creeping back up (even though I'm on a lot of meds) which they are very concerned about. They are already fairly certain I won't go full term, and will want to induce by 39 weeks, if that. I honestly feel like it could be sooner.
This past week I spent a night in the hospital getting a 24 hour urine test, labs, ultrasound, blood work etc etc. For now, they have ruled out pre-eclampsia, though I am going to be monitored quite frequently (ALL THE TIME) for the rest of the pregnancy, and I'm scared shitless this may mean an even early delivery, more and longer hospital stays, worsening BP readings, effects to me and the baby, lots more medications and IVs, or other things I don't know and am not in control of. The docs honestly seem a bit perplexed why someone so young (I'm 33) and otherwise in good health would have such high blood pressure, but it's hard to get to the bottom of it while I'm pregnant. Anyway, I get SOOOO anxious now every time I'm at the doc,it's painful to go and have to see the numbers, and have no idea what's going to happen (if I'm going to have to go back to the hospital, go on bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy, or just in general how to do or anticipate anything for the rest of this pregnancy!!) The nurses and nurse practitioner I saw last week were fairly certain my anxiety had a least some part in my high BP readings, and even suggested taking Zoloft- though I still feel uncertain. (At the pharmacy, the pharmacists suggested taking Zoloft in the last trimester was NOT a good idea? and that I should really speak to my OB again. Great.)
I do feel like I'm getting good treatment, and in good hands with the high-risk OBs.. The baby is doing well, and does not appear to have been affected by this situation at all- she is growing well, and moving a lot, and heart beat is perfect. And I feel so thankful I'm not sick, have an amazing partner who has been seeing my through every step of this. We have lots of family and friends around, and I'm getting a doula.
I feel super anxious about money, but trying not to freak out. I will probably be eligible for Medicaid (and we have decent health insurance) if I have to do a long hospital stay- but still, I'm scared how we're going to deal with all this, both logistically and emotionally. We don't have a lot of money, though enough to get by for 6-8 months (my husband works, I'm still working part-time for now, and we have some savings.)
Ah, I just don't know how to handle all the unknowns in my head right now, while also, just dealing with the "regular" stuff to do to get ready for the baby... Of course, all I want is a healthy me and healthy baby, but I also want to stay sane, feel good about myself,& not spiral every day into the worst case scenario.
Of course, trying to do A LOT of self-care: lots of relaxing, baths, walking, being outside, eating well, asking for help/support, not taking on any more that I can.
Any advice/encouragement/stories of your own health crisis/pregnancy that turned out well, things that helped if you were in the hospital, coping strategies would be so helpful right now!
Forgot...these things are a god send for anyone pregnant, in hospital, or pregnant in hospital. Everything falls off the bloody bed and it's a pain in the bum to jump out and get it all the time. Get one, you'll thank me.
Deep breaths. And hugs.
posted by taff at 7:25 AM on April 13, 2015
Deep breaths. And hugs.
posted by taff at 7:25 AM on April 13, 2015
Re: Zoloft, I am 29 weeks pregnant and started Zoloft during my pregnancy. Yes, it's Category C so risk can't be ruled out but my doctor and I felt that the benefits outweigh the risks. There's been no talk of taking me off it, in fact I will likely stay on it, in case of post-partum depression issues.
Long story short, if you need Zoloft or other antidepressant medication to help you mentally deal with the rest of your pregnancy, you should consider it. It's important to take care of you as well as baby. My doc assured me that Zoloft was one of the safest options for this.
posted by cabingirl at 7:26 AM on April 13, 2015
Long story short, if you need Zoloft or other antidepressant medication to help you mentally deal with the rest of your pregnancy, you should consider it. It's important to take care of you as well as baby. My doc assured me that Zoloft was one of the safest options for this.
posted by cabingirl at 7:26 AM on April 13, 2015
1) "The baby is doing well, and does not appear to have been affected by this situation at all- she is growing well, and moving a lot, and heart beat is perfect."
This is great news!! Every day this is true is a good day. This is the first of many times that you will suffer with great worry on behalf of your baby, and s/he will be blissfully unaware.
2) Count pregnancy week milestones. I had premature labor (which was stopped) and have experience with premature infants via my cousin. You're 28 weeks. That means that even if baby comes right this minute, s/he'll spend a lot of time in the hospital, but will probably be FINE. My cousin's 27 weeker is doing great and you'd never know she was a preemie. Once you get to 30 weeks, the likelihood of serious complications plummets. By 34 weeks? S/he'll barely have to go to the NICU. Every day the baby spends inside you is a day closer to hale heartiness, but when it's time to come, the doctors will have your back. Induction at 38-39 weeks is not a thing to worry about.
3) "dealing with the "regular" stuff to do to get ready for the baby" Sounds to me like this is now your husband's problem. You need a carseat and one spot for the baby to sleep. Maybe have your husband go pick up a carseat if you don't have one yet. Chicco Keyfit is good for tiny babies, plus it's a good seat overall. Seriously, to bring a baby home from the hospital, that's all you need. They'll give you a t-shirt and a hat in the hospital, you'll bring home a couple days' worth of diapers and wipes, and probably a thermometer and a nasal syringe. If need be, baby stuff can be obtained after you have a baby. Anything you accomplish before then is bonus.
4) Anxiety: Yeah, this is the mother of all catch-22s. Don't be anxious, it's bad for the baby! {cue anxiety spike} When they measure your blood pressure in the hospital, try to force yourself to take a lot of deep breaths beforehand. Remind yourself where possible that this is temporary. Your goal today is to stay calm and hold onto that baby til tomorrow.
Count your blessings (they are many), vent about your indignities (THEY ARE REAL!), and hang in there.
posted by telepanda at 7:29 AM on April 13, 2015 [4 favorites]
This is great news!! Every day this is true is a good day. This is the first of many times that you will suffer with great worry on behalf of your baby, and s/he will be blissfully unaware.
2) Count pregnancy week milestones. I had premature labor (which was stopped) and have experience with premature infants via my cousin. You're 28 weeks. That means that even if baby comes right this minute, s/he'll spend a lot of time in the hospital, but will probably be FINE. My cousin's 27 weeker is doing great and you'd never know she was a preemie. Once you get to 30 weeks, the likelihood of serious complications plummets. By 34 weeks? S/he'll barely have to go to the NICU. Every day the baby spends inside you is a day closer to hale heartiness, but when it's time to come, the doctors will have your back. Induction at 38-39 weeks is not a thing to worry about.
3) "dealing with the "regular" stuff to do to get ready for the baby" Sounds to me like this is now your husband's problem. You need a carseat and one spot for the baby to sleep. Maybe have your husband go pick up a carseat if you don't have one yet. Chicco Keyfit is good for tiny babies, plus it's a good seat overall. Seriously, to bring a baby home from the hospital, that's all you need. They'll give you a t-shirt and a hat in the hospital, you'll bring home a couple days' worth of diapers and wipes, and probably a thermometer and a nasal syringe. If need be, baby stuff can be obtained after you have a baby. Anything you accomplish before then is bonus.
4) Anxiety: Yeah, this is the mother of all catch-22s. Don't be anxious, it's bad for the baby! {cue anxiety spike} When they measure your blood pressure in the hospital, try to force yourself to take a lot of deep breaths beforehand. Remind yourself where possible that this is temporary. Your goal today is to stay calm and hold onto that baby til tomorrow.
Count your blessings (they are many), vent about your indignities (THEY ARE REAL!), and hang in there.
posted by telepanda at 7:29 AM on April 13, 2015 [4 favorites]
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Taff has a good point, though, that you've made it to the point where you could have this baby now and she would almost certainly be completely fine. (I know it can be hard to focus on that, but maybe if you tried reading some blogs by parents of preemies it would make you feel more comfortable with that possible outcome?)
The one suggestion I would make is to try to focus on the baby you're about to have (because however it happens, you're going to have one, and it's going to be amazing!). What if you were to just focus your anxiety on to learning as much as you can about how your baby will develop when it's born? Read tons about baby's development in the first month, the second month, etc. etc. etc. You could even take notes and chart out games you can play to encourage your baby's development (the book "Wonder Weeks" is great for this). For me, at least, it really helps to have something productive to do with my anxiety...and as the parent of a 3-month-old, this is what I wish I'd done more of during my pregnancy.
Everything you're feeling is completely understandable - but the more you can tell yourself that everything is going to be ok, the better you'll feel. That type of self-soothing is helpful for early parenthood as well. :) Best of luck on the rest of your pregnancy - and congratulations on the baby you'll soon have!
posted by leitmotif at 7:53 AM on April 13, 2015
The one suggestion I would make is to try to focus on the baby you're about to have (because however it happens, you're going to have one, and it's going to be amazing!). What if you were to just focus your anxiety on to learning as much as you can about how your baby will develop when it's born? Read tons about baby's development in the first month, the second month, etc. etc. etc. You could even take notes and chart out games you can play to encourage your baby's development (the book "Wonder Weeks" is great for this). For me, at least, it really helps to have something productive to do with my anxiety...and as the parent of a 3-month-old, this is what I wish I'd done more of during my pregnancy.
Everything you're feeling is completely understandable - but the more you can tell yourself that everything is going to be ok, the better you'll feel. That type of self-soothing is helpful for early parenthood as well. :) Best of luck on the rest of your pregnancy - and congratulations on the baby you'll soon have!
posted by leitmotif at 7:53 AM on April 13, 2015
Regarding antidepressants/anti-anxiety medications: plenty of women take them throughout pregnancy. If you need it, you need it.
Another help for anxiety is meditation. I had great success with several of the top-rated meditation apps on the iTunes Store, like Calm and Stop Breathe & Think. (Disclaimer: the Calm meditation guide can't pronounce "forehead," but otherwise it's great!) Bonus: the ability to meditate can help you in labor and in stressful situations for the rest of your life!
Also don't feel bad asking for help doing things. If you are feeling too stressed out, ask your husband or a trusted friend to do a task for you. As pointed out above, having him handle the car seat is a great idea.
From one pregnant woman to another, remember that your baby is developing wonderfully and will be fine even if born early. Hang in there.
posted by Locative at 7:57 AM on April 13, 2015
Another help for anxiety is meditation. I had great success with several of the top-rated meditation apps on the iTunes Store, like Calm and Stop Breathe & Think. (Disclaimer: the Calm meditation guide can't pronounce "forehead," but otherwise it's great!) Bonus: the ability to meditate can help you in labor and in stressful situations for the rest of your life!
Also don't feel bad asking for help doing things. If you are feeling too stressed out, ask your husband or a trusted friend to do a task for you. As pointed out above, having him handle the car seat is a great idea.
From one pregnant woman to another, remember that your baby is developing wonderfully and will be fine even if born early. Hang in there.
posted by Locative at 7:57 AM on April 13, 2015
Buy a blood pressure cuff at the pharmacy so you can take daily readings at home and get an idea of what your numbers are like when you aren't at the doctor's office.
posted by annathea at 8:22 AM on April 13, 2015 [6 favorites]
posted by annathea at 8:22 AM on April 13, 2015 [6 favorites]
Also coming here to suggest meditation. It's one thing to "try to relax", and another to go one step further and actually practice it and improve your ability to calm your mind and body. Good luck and I hope both you and the baby stay healthy.
posted by molasses at 8:59 AM on April 13, 2015
posted by molasses at 8:59 AM on April 13, 2015
I've dealt with white coat hypertension in pregnancy. It sucked. I could take my BP in the parking lot and it would be normal, and then sky rocket when I walked into the office just because my mind would be racing about the possible numbers.
Do you have your own cuff? This is essentially a phobia and monitoring my own BP at home both gave me exposure and reassurance that things were actually okay.
From what I know about white coat, mindfulness actually doesn't help, and this was my experience. What worked was just to watch the numbers on the cuff, and asking doctors to take my BP both at the beginning and the end of the appointment. It was always, always lower at the end.
Good luck, and I'm sorry. I know how hard this is.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:46 AM on April 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
Do you have your own cuff? This is essentially a phobia and monitoring my own BP at home both gave me exposure and reassurance that things were actually okay.
From what I know about white coat, mindfulness actually doesn't help, and this was my experience. What worked was just to watch the numbers on the cuff, and asking doctors to take my BP both at the beginning and the end of the appointment. It was always, always lower at the end.
Good luck, and I'm sorry. I know how hard this is.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:46 AM on April 13, 2015 [2 favorites]
I'm almost 27 weeks and just got home from the hospital after a surgery to keep the baby inside because of preterm labor at 24 weeks.
I can't tell you how happy I was to reach 26 weeks because the risk of disabilities and the baby being poorly go down a lot. Everyone's right, you're giving that baby extra time in the oven now and each day you've got him in there is a gift. I try to reduce my stress and anxiety by reminding myself that my job is to be a happy and safe home for my baby and my job is to stay calm... It helps most of the time.
I also came home from the hospital a lot more emotionally labile than I was when I went in. I cry, have hurt feelings,
Get mad, overwhelmed etc. sooooo much faster now. I'm not sure how much of that was triggered by the anxiety of having a high risk pregnancy, I think some was- but we are also heavily pregnant women ANYWAY which isn't easy!
Feel free to me mail me :-)
(I posted a similar question last week when I was feeling pretty low and got some good advice here, I'm sure you will too!)
posted by catspajammies at 10:10 AM on April 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
I can't tell you how happy I was to reach 26 weeks because the risk of disabilities and the baby being poorly go down a lot. Everyone's right, you're giving that baby extra time in the oven now and each day you've got him in there is a gift. I try to reduce my stress and anxiety by reminding myself that my job is to be a happy and safe home for my baby and my job is to stay calm... It helps most of the time.
I also came home from the hospital a lot more emotionally labile than I was when I went in. I cry, have hurt feelings,
Get mad, overwhelmed etc. sooooo much faster now. I'm not sure how much of that was triggered by the anxiety of having a high risk pregnancy, I think some was- but we are also heavily pregnant women ANYWAY which isn't easy!
Feel free to me mail me :-)
(I posted a similar question last week when I was feeling pretty low and got some good advice here, I'm sure you will too!)
posted by catspajammies at 10:10 AM on April 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
Ps- if you think you might end up in the hospital, do yourself a favor and pack your bag now, choose a book to take, load a tv show on your iPad. I now have a bag pre packed with 3 pairs of comfy bottoms and 4 tops I love and all my important little toiletries and makeup. When I was in the hospital and trying to tell my husband what tops I wanted he had no idea WHICH of my 8 black tops was my favorite, or what mascara looked like.
posted by catspajammies at 10:15 AM on April 13, 2015
posted by catspajammies at 10:15 AM on April 13, 2015
All that being said, even my crunchy homebirth midwives weren't going to Ness around with uncontrolled hypertension, which is a problem even aside from the riskof preeclampsia. It is AWESOME that you are pregnant now that your doctors are concerned and monitoring your health for the safety of both you and your little person. I hope you can take some comfort in that.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 10:20 AM on April 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 10:20 AM on April 13, 2015 [1 favorite]
I spent time in the high risk pre-natal unit when pregnant with a high risk pregnancy (incidentally, I have preexisting hypertension, and weirdly, as I went further along in pregnancy, it actually dropped....so, yes, this does happen to some of us). What saved me was knowing I had a FANTASTIC OB team, and baby was rocking the pregnancy. The things I did that helped was a) took my toothbrush and laptop to every hospital appointment in case I was direct admitted from the appointment. These were the two things I wanted with me no matter what. b) Celebrating the milestones. I kid you not, we had a party when I hit 24 weeks (viable!) and again at 30 weeks (not so teeny preemie territory).
As for checking blood pressure, ask to lie down or sit down for 5-10 minutes before they check your BP (maybe with the cuff already on, but deflated) so all someone has to do is come in and check it. I know my BP changes dramatically if I have been rushing around or am nervous. A correct size cuff is also critically important, if you are a bigger person. There is a test called an 'ambulatory P test' where you get this battery pack thing and a cuff you wear for 24 hours, and it checks your BP automatically every hour or so. This could show if your BP readings are just at the hospital or if it is elevated when you are home, asleep, etc. Its an easy test (I have had this before).
I shopped for baby stuff as my energy and ability allowed, did some shopping online, and tried very hard not to sweat the fact that my house (at home, I was away in the big city for the last 6 weeks, to be close to awesome OB team) had no functional kitchen.
I did have an epidural for an induced (37.5 weeks) Vag delivery as my docs felt this would help keep my blood pressure down in labour (it did), and I didn't complain about this. So, do ask about pain relief and BP management in labour ahead of times. Uncontrolled pain can drive up your blood pressure, so pain management may be a priority for your team.
Small human is now 4 and apart from a severe case of 'acts like a teenaged girl sometimes', is awesome in every way. At 37 weeks, she was not considered a preemie. Now they call 37-38wks 'early term' and if there are maternal issues, they are certainly as safe, if not safer, outside of mom at that age. 38 weeks is not something to panic about. :-)
I will think positive baby vibes for you, and wish you an easy rest of pregnancy.
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 10:37 AM on April 13, 2015 [5 favorites]
As for checking blood pressure, ask to lie down or sit down for 5-10 minutes before they check your BP (maybe with the cuff already on, but deflated) so all someone has to do is come in and check it. I know my BP changes dramatically if I have been rushing around or am nervous. A correct size cuff is also critically important, if you are a bigger person. There is a test called an 'ambulatory P test' where you get this battery pack thing and a cuff you wear for 24 hours, and it checks your BP automatically every hour or so. This could show if your BP readings are just at the hospital or if it is elevated when you are home, asleep, etc. Its an easy test (I have had this before).
I shopped for baby stuff as my energy and ability allowed, did some shopping online, and tried very hard not to sweat the fact that my house (at home, I was away in the big city for the last 6 weeks, to be close to awesome OB team) had no functional kitchen.
I did have an epidural for an induced (37.5 weeks) Vag delivery as my docs felt this would help keep my blood pressure down in labour (it did), and I didn't complain about this. So, do ask about pain relief and BP management in labour ahead of times. Uncontrolled pain can drive up your blood pressure, so pain management may be a priority for your team.
Small human is now 4 and apart from a severe case of 'acts like a teenaged girl sometimes', is awesome in every way. At 37 weeks, she was not considered a preemie. Now they call 37-38wks 'early term' and if there are maternal issues, they are certainly as safe, if not safer, outside of mom at that age. 38 weeks is not something to panic about. :-)
I will think positive baby vibes for you, and wish you an easy rest of pregnancy.
posted by Northbysomewhatcrazy at 10:37 AM on April 13, 2015 [5 favorites]
A correct size cuff is also critically important, if you are a bigger person.
I cannot overstate the importance of this enough. I am a bigger person with disproportionately large upper arms, and last week I got a reading on the automatic blood pressure machine of 171/59. When I pointed out to the doctor that this wasn't just anomalous for me, but anomalous for ANYONE, he re-took my pressure manually with a large cuff and got a perfectly physiological 116/72.
I presume that for something this high-stakes they have an experienced person taking your blood pressure manually. But just in case. . . . yeah, make sure they are doing that.
posted by KathrynT at 1:51 AM on April 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
I cannot overstate the importance of this enough. I am a bigger person with disproportionately large upper arms, and last week I got a reading on the automatic blood pressure machine of 171/59. When I pointed out to the doctor that this wasn't just anomalous for me, but anomalous for ANYONE, he re-took my pressure manually with a large cuff and got a perfectly physiological 116/72.
I presume that for something this high-stakes they have an experienced person taking your blood pressure manually. But just in case. . . . yeah, make sure they are doing that.
posted by KathrynT at 1:51 AM on April 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
Hi there! You are describing exactly my experience down to a T. I was an undiagnosed chronic hypertensive as well, on procardia, anxious about my numbers at every appointment, and gave birth to a very healthy baby boy (though on the "small side" 6 lbs, 3.8 oz) a day after my due date. I had 7 urine holds, a shot (for myself) at about 30 weeks to help his lungs develop in the event of an early pregnancy. My docs threatened bed rest every step of the way, nagged me about numbers, and watched me like a hawk all through my pregnancy. I was freaked out the entire time like you are now. Take comfort in the fact that you have a team of doctors who are doing everything in their power to make sure your baby is born healthy and within the right time frame of viability, but that if things do not go according to plan, that they have a plan for that as well. I'm still on BP meds after the first birth, then I had another baby in May of last year, and remain on it. You're on the right track and as long as you take care of yourself, your baby will be fine. Please go easy on yourself. Try not to worry about the things you cannot control (even freaking out, which I maintain is impossible to control while fueled with life-building hormones). What other people are saying about arm cuffs during BP readings is essential. Good luck!
posted by ThaBombShelterSmith at 8:04 AM on April 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
posted by ThaBombShelterSmith at 8:04 AM on April 14, 2015 [2 favorites]
During my previous pregnancy my first OB (a high-risk specialist) was constantly worrying me and making me fret over everything, even though my only high-risk factors were age, weight, and a history of miscarriage, no other diagnosed condition. This doctor told me not to do prenatal yoga or even go walking. Of course, he also asked me at my 14wk appointment when I wanted to schedule my C-section for, when I'd never mentioned a C-section. I ended up switching at 27 weeks just to get away from his nonsense.
I'm currently 34wks pregnant with my second; even older and still with the history of miscarriage, but thankfully I managed to lose a bunch of weight in between pregnancies. Still, I worry about everything (will I have a late-term miscarriage? Will the umbilical cord wrap around the baby's neck? Will I have to have a C-section for some unforeseen reason? Because I'm older now, will the baby end up having autism? etc etc etc).
Now, as you have a diagnosed condition I wouldn't recommend changing doctors or clinics at this point. But I find that the only thing that helps me stay calm is a sort of "fake it til you make it" attitude. Even though I'm anxious when I walk into the doctor's office, I put a smile on my face and act calm. When they ask me how I'm feeling I answer with an enthusiastic "Good!" I feel like if I say "oh, fine" or express concerns right away, the doctor picks up on that and begins to express concerns too. If I act like everything is good, the doctor relaxes and trusts my body too.
It seems to me if you keep submitting to the constant monitoring, if you are monitoring every day at home, if you keep walking around like something is wrong, your anxiety will stay high, which won't help you. Instead, I humbly submit that you try to take a break from the constant worry. Don't monitor at home. See if you can reasonably skip an appointment for one week (with your doctor's approval, of course). Pay attention to how your body feels, rather than what the doctors tell you is going on. If you feel fine, carry on. If you're tired, rest. Sit in a bath with Epsom salts every night. Take everything else off your plate. Don't cook, don't clean. Sit down with a book. Listen to some relaxation music.
I know that all sounds woo and I certainly don't mean that you should ignore your doctors, I just mean try to take a step back from whatever anxiety that they are producing in you. Doctors are there to doctor, and they also need to make sure their butts are covered in case you do go early and then come back and sue them for some test that "they should have done". My own (current) OB told this to me straight out when I questioned some testing that she was recommending. She said "well, you don't have to do the test if you don't want to, but I have to make it clear in your records that it was recommended and that you chose not to do it." So keep that aspect in mind.
posted by vignettist at 1:52 PM on April 14, 2015
I'm currently 34wks pregnant with my second; even older and still with the history of miscarriage, but thankfully I managed to lose a bunch of weight in between pregnancies. Still, I worry about everything (will I have a late-term miscarriage? Will the umbilical cord wrap around the baby's neck? Will I have to have a C-section for some unforeseen reason? Because I'm older now, will the baby end up having autism? etc etc etc).
Now, as you have a diagnosed condition I wouldn't recommend changing doctors or clinics at this point. But I find that the only thing that helps me stay calm is a sort of "fake it til you make it" attitude. Even though I'm anxious when I walk into the doctor's office, I put a smile on my face and act calm. When they ask me how I'm feeling I answer with an enthusiastic "Good!" I feel like if I say "oh, fine" or express concerns right away, the doctor picks up on that and begins to express concerns too. If I act like everything is good, the doctor relaxes and trusts my body too.
It seems to me if you keep submitting to the constant monitoring, if you are monitoring every day at home, if you keep walking around like something is wrong, your anxiety will stay high, which won't help you. Instead, I humbly submit that you try to take a break from the constant worry. Don't monitor at home. See if you can reasonably skip an appointment for one week (with your doctor's approval, of course). Pay attention to how your body feels, rather than what the doctors tell you is going on. If you feel fine, carry on. If you're tired, rest. Sit in a bath with Epsom salts every night. Take everything else off your plate. Don't cook, don't clean. Sit down with a book. Listen to some relaxation music.
I know that all sounds woo and I certainly don't mean that you should ignore your doctors, I just mean try to take a step back from whatever anxiety that they are producing in you. Doctors are there to doctor, and they also need to make sure their butts are covered in case you do go early and then come back and sue them for some test that "they should have done". My own (current) OB told this to me straight out when I questioned some testing that she was recommending. She said "well, you don't have to do the test if you don't want to, but I have to make it clear in your records that it was recommended and that you chose not to do it." So keep that aspect in mind.
posted by vignettist at 1:52 PM on April 14, 2015
Response by poster: Just wanted to update for any future mamas going through a rough pregnancy - everything turned out really well, even though it wasn't always easy. I delivered at 39 weeks to a very healthy baby girl via an (long and hard! but worth it) induction ( due to BP issues and at the last minute low fluids. Still wonder if I could have waited to go into labor naturally, but we warded off an induction for a couple weeks, and it overall felt like the right call.)
Also, the suggestions for letting me lie down with the cuff on before they tested was crucial - BP would be consistently in the 120's/130/s over 80ish. That and getting regular accupuncture towards the end of my pregnancy.
posted by Rocket26 at 3:37 PM on July 21, 2015 [1 favorite]
Also, the suggestions for letting me lie down with the cuff on before they tested was crucial - BP would be consistently in the 120's/130/s over 80ish. That and getting regular accupuncture towards the end of my pregnancy.
posted by Rocket26 at 3:37 PM on July 21, 2015 [1 favorite]
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Deep breaths, you've cooked this little one the best you can, if she came out tomorrow she'd be small but fine. Any extra day you get now is just crisping her up. Deep breaths, she's going to be fine. Trust your doctors. She's going to be fine. Deep breaths. And massive hugs.
Of course you're worried, you're her mum. I was terrified. But deep breaths, 28 weeks is home and hosed. Deep breaths. And hugs.
posted by taff at 7:20 AM on April 13, 2015 [8 favorites]