Self-destructive perfectionism keeping me from passing in schoolwork?
November 25, 2014 9:55 AM Subscribe
I'm doing poorly in one of my classes because I've turned in very little homework even though I'm doing really well otherwise. Most of the missing work is actually done, but I can't pass it in because it isn't 100% perfect. Please help me understand this behavior and suggest things that have helped you in the past.
About me: I'm a 27 year old student in a fairly rigorous Post-Baccalaureate program in Mathematics. I was out of school for 5 years before I came here. I was also recently diagnosed with ADD and after getting treatment in the form of therapy and proper medication, I felt like I was ready to tackle school again and hopefully get into a good Phd program. So far there are a lot of things that are different - I can sit through lectures and pay attention almost the entire time and I'm able to work in groups whereas those things were nearly impossible to me before I got treatment.
However, I'm still messing up in a way that almost seems self-destructive to me. I've done almost all the work for this class, but I just don't pass it in. I don't understand why I feel so ashamed to pass something in that isn't completely perfect, because I never used to be like this when I was younger. In fact, I'd say that I was REALLY good at half assing things at the last minute and rolling with the imperfections.
The professor is a really reasonable and flexible person and I have contacted him explaining that most of the work is done. I've made an appointment to see a school counselor so I can get a referral to see therapist again but over Thanksgiving break I'll be left to my own devices and this time off is a good opportunity to spend time on old work. I already do things like the Pomodoro technique to help with staying on task in general. Its more that I'm literally afraid to finish this work than I'm having a hard time focusing.
The excuses I make range from not being able to justify one aspect of a page-long mathematical proof to not being able to decide how I want to format something in LaTeX. I'm completely aware of how ridiculous it is to ruin my grade over things like this, but I feel completely paralyzed and I'd really appreciate ANYTHING that might be able to give me the kick in the butt I need to get moving. I know this has something to with procrastination, but I don't even understand what exactly it is that I'm procrastinating over. Help?
About me: I'm a 27 year old student in a fairly rigorous Post-Baccalaureate program in Mathematics. I was out of school for 5 years before I came here. I was also recently diagnosed with ADD and after getting treatment in the form of therapy and proper medication, I felt like I was ready to tackle school again and hopefully get into a good Phd program. So far there are a lot of things that are different - I can sit through lectures and pay attention almost the entire time and I'm able to work in groups whereas those things were nearly impossible to me before I got treatment.
However, I'm still messing up in a way that almost seems self-destructive to me. I've done almost all the work for this class, but I just don't pass it in. I don't understand why I feel so ashamed to pass something in that isn't completely perfect, because I never used to be like this when I was younger. In fact, I'd say that I was REALLY good at half assing things at the last minute and rolling with the imperfections.
The professor is a really reasonable and flexible person and I have contacted him explaining that most of the work is done. I've made an appointment to see a school counselor so I can get a referral to see therapist again but over Thanksgiving break I'll be left to my own devices and this time off is a good opportunity to spend time on old work. I already do things like the Pomodoro technique to help with staying on task in general. Its more that I'm literally afraid to finish this work than I'm having a hard time focusing.
The excuses I make range from not being able to justify one aspect of a page-long mathematical proof to not being able to decide how I want to format something in LaTeX. I'm completely aware of how ridiculous it is to ruin my grade over things like this, but I feel completely paralyzed and I'd really appreciate ANYTHING that might be able to give me the kick in the butt I need to get moving. I know this has something to with procrastination, but I don't even understand what exactly it is that I'm procrastinating over. Help?
I recommend reading The Now Habit by Neil Fiore. He addresses the type of mental resistance you are experiencing. When I experience that type of resistance, I think about the Nike slogan: Just Do It! But I use that as a shorthand for what Fiore and Steven Pressfield have written. It's not really the substance of their work that's so helpful as the change of perspective it might bring for you. Good luck.
posted by Slap Factory at 10:11 AM on November 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by Slap Factory at 10:11 AM on November 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
I would make time to talk to your school counselor about anxiety in general, because this sounds really tied into that. (There's a lot of things about this that ping anxiety to me, although I am not in any way a mental health professional, so take all this with a grain of salt.)
It sounds to me like that.... given your past history with having difficulty focusing and keeping yourself organizing, plus it sounds like you frequently handed in work you weren't proud of, combined with the way you keep talking about making a fresh start.... could this be maybe a little about not wanting to be that old disorganized "bad" student and wanting to "prove" you've really changed your ways now that you've got a handle on the ADD? You sound like you've been hard on yourself about previous academic performance, and that you're putting some amount of pressure on yourself to succeed now that you've fixed the problem. And, well, what if you're not perfect now that you sorted out the big problem? What if you didn't "really" fix it by getting a handle on the ADHD, what if you really are genuinely a terrible student? [Those last two sentences being me thinking about possible things your hindbrain might be saying, not things I actually believe.] That's probably not true, but especially if the ADHD diagnosis is new and your history of thinking of yourself as a bad or mediocre student isn't, it's not uncommon to react that way to a newly diagnosed learning disorder.
In the course I TA, I sometimes see really motivated students who badly want to succeed--and who work hard at the material!--second-guess themselves and undercut their performance because they are so terrified of being less than perfect. That takes a lot of forms, from constantly changing answers on exams because they don't trust their initial response (usually for the worse) to not eating and sleeping properly so they don't retain the material they study to getting so anxious about the material that they panic on the exam and lose the ability to focus. These are invariably talented students who really can do the material and know their stuff, but this drive to be perfect all the time and get A's on every single exam (uncurved, no less, in a difficult course) really takes a toll on their ability to focus purely on the information in front of them.
I am also currently taking a reasonably demanding class in a subject I had not previously touched in six years, where I am older than most of the people in the class and in a significantly different stage of my career. I don't have this particular problem, but I do get anxious about the material sometimes and it definitely feels weirdly full of baggage to be in that position. Like you're going to stand out as a student no matter what you do, so you'd better be good or people will think badly of you.
Anyway, trying to be nicer to yourself and go "It's okay if I fail sometimes" or "It's okay if I'm wrong" are generally good things to help get around perfectionism that is hindering your ability to actually get things done. For me, I absolutely hate getting things wrong, so I actively try to remind myself that you learn way more from trying problems and getting them wrong than you do from getting them right, and it's better to get things wrong before they matter too much to your grades. I also try to remind myself that being willing to publicly get things wrong (and to try in class) means that people also see me publicly getting things right, and that my failures matter way more to me than they do to other people.
posted by sciatrix at 10:14 AM on November 25, 2014 [5 favorites]
It sounds to me like that.... given your past history with having difficulty focusing and keeping yourself organizing, plus it sounds like you frequently handed in work you weren't proud of, combined with the way you keep talking about making a fresh start.... could this be maybe a little about not wanting to be that old disorganized "bad" student and wanting to "prove" you've really changed your ways now that you've got a handle on the ADD? You sound like you've been hard on yourself about previous academic performance, and that you're putting some amount of pressure on yourself to succeed now that you've fixed the problem. And, well, what if you're not perfect now that you sorted out the big problem? What if you didn't "really" fix it by getting a handle on the ADHD, what if you really are genuinely a terrible student? [Those last two sentences being me thinking about possible things your hindbrain might be saying, not things I actually believe.] That's probably not true, but especially if the ADHD diagnosis is new and your history of thinking of yourself as a bad or mediocre student isn't, it's not uncommon to react that way to a newly diagnosed learning disorder.
In the course I TA, I sometimes see really motivated students who badly want to succeed--and who work hard at the material!--second-guess themselves and undercut their performance because they are so terrified of being less than perfect. That takes a lot of forms, from constantly changing answers on exams because they don't trust their initial response (usually for the worse) to not eating and sleeping properly so they don't retain the material they study to getting so anxious about the material that they panic on the exam and lose the ability to focus. These are invariably talented students who really can do the material and know their stuff, but this drive to be perfect all the time and get A's on every single exam (uncurved, no less, in a difficult course) really takes a toll on their ability to focus purely on the information in front of them.
I am also currently taking a reasonably demanding class in a subject I had not previously touched in six years, where I am older than most of the people in the class and in a significantly different stage of my career. I don't have this particular problem, but I do get anxious about the material sometimes and it definitely feels weirdly full of baggage to be in that position. Like you're going to stand out as a student no matter what you do, so you'd better be good or people will think badly of you.
Anyway, trying to be nicer to yourself and go "It's okay if I fail sometimes" or "It's okay if I'm wrong" are generally good things to help get around perfectionism that is hindering your ability to actually get things done. For me, I absolutely hate getting things wrong, so I actively try to remind myself that you learn way more from trying problems and getting them wrong than you do from getting them right, and it's better to get things wrong before they matter too much to your grades. I also try to remind myself that being willing to publicly get things wrong (and to try in class) means that people also see me publicly getting things right, and that my failures matter way more to me than they do to other people.
posted by sciatrix at 10:14 AM on November 25, 2014 [5 favorites]
We're all internet strangers. Keep that in mind. What I'm about to say is a suggestion, and that's it.
But what you describe seems to me like more of a symptom than the underlying problem. What I read, when I read your question, is someone who is struggling with anxiety. My suggestion is: perhaps the perfectionism, the paralysis about imperfections, etc., is a symptom of an underlying and more expansive problem with anxiety.
It is a very good thing that you're seeing a counselor. They will be able to help, and they will be in a far better position to work with you and figure out what is going on. But I suggest, in the meantime, focusing less on the specific issues you've located and more on general calming techniques. Try to meditate. Every hour or so, spend a few minutes focusing on breathing very deeply. Take a nice bath. Exercise. Do the sorts of things that can help you develop calmness. You may want to look up 'mindfulness' and 'mindfulness exercises'.
If what you're describing as perfectionism has its roots in deeper anxiety, then this will help you engage with your work. It feels really counter-intuitive, especially when you're in the throws of anxiety, but it's still true: taking some time specifically to not work or think or anything is often the best way to help you get your work done.
posted by meese at 10:17 AM on November 25, 2014 [3 favorites]
But what you describe seems to me like more of a symptom than the underlying problem. What I read, when I read your question, is someone who is struggling with anxiety. My suggestion is: perhaps the perfectionism, the paralysis about imperfections, etc., is a symptom of an underlying and more expansive problem with anxiety.
It is a very good thing that you're seeing a counselor. They will be able to help, and they will be in a far better position to work with you and figure out what is going on. But I suggest, in the meantime, focusing less on the specific issues you've located and more on general calming techniques. Try to meditate. Every hour or so, spend a few minutes focusing on breathing very deeply. Take a nice bath. Exercise. Do the sorts of things that can help you develop calmness. You may want to look up 'mindfulness' and 'mindfulness exercises'.
If what you're describing as perfectionism has its roots in deeper anxiety, then this will help you engage with your work. It feels really counter-intuitive, especially when you're in the throws of anxiety, but it's still true: taking some time specifically to not work or think or anything is often the best way to help you get your work done.
posted by meese at 10:17 AM on November 25, 2014 [3 favorites]
Which will feel worse, turning something in that is less than perfect and getting an unknown grade, or failing your classes completely?
The funny thing about avoidance tactics is that they fulfill the very fear we're specifically seeking to avoid. We don't turn work in because we believe that unless it is perfect, we will fail, and then we fail any way because we never turned the work in at all.
You are stronger and more resilient than you think. You will survive if your work is not perfect. Better still, you will GROW and get closer and closer to being exactly what you want by risking imperfection.
Set a timer right now for 30 minutes and set out to complete one assignment. At the end of that 30 minutes, it's done. Don't look at it. Turn it in. End of story. Move on to the next task and set your timer. Keep going. You can do this.
Memail me if you want to chat about overcoming perfectionism. My therapist's office considers me their poster child for recovery, my case was so extreme. But I got over it, and God, it was worth it.
You will too.
posted by Hermione Granger at 10:50 AM on November 25, 2014
The funny thing about avoidance tactics is that they fulfill the very fear we're specifically seeking to avoid. We don't turn work in because we believe that unless it is perfect, we will fail, and then we fail any way because we never turned the work in at all.
You are stronger and more resilient than you think. You will survive if your work is not perfect. Better still, you will GROW and get closer and closer to being exactly what you want by risking imperfection.
Set a timer right now for 30 minutes and set out to complete one assignment. At the end of that 30 minutes, it's done. Don't look at it. Turn it in. End of story. Move on to the next task and set your timer. Keep going. You can do this.
Memail me if you want to chat about overcoming perfectionism. My therapist's office considers me their poster child for recovery, my case was so extreme. But I got over it, and God, it was worth it.
You will too.
posted by Hermione Granger at 10:50 AM on November 25, 2014
Nthing anxiety as part of the problem. ADD here, along with anxiety, perfectionism, and lots more. But yes, the bottom line is that you need to turn stuff in.
If you're getting the work done by the deadlines, but still have anxiety about handing in something that isn't perfect, tell yourself you are just turning in a DRAFT to meet the deadline. Once the deadline passes, you will have a clearer head about whether the work was actually up to snuff and no longer requires your attention, or whether you need to put in some more time and ask the prof to accept your next draft late.
posted by trivia genius at 11:01 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
If you're getting the work done by the deadlines, but still have anxiety about handing in something that isn't perfect, tell yourself you are just turning in a DRAFT to meet the deadline. Once the deadline passes, you will have a clearer head about whether the work was actually up to snuff and no longer requires your attention, or whether you need to put in some more time and ask the prof to accept your next draft late.
posted by trivia genius at 11:01 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
Hey! I'm also a post-bacc student who came back to school after an ADHD diagnosis. I totally recognize this pattern of thinking.
For me, the thing that fueled it was the fact that not doing homework (and thus maintaining the old self-conception of worthlessness, inability, and squandered potential) was easier psychologically than entering the scary new world of competence. For me, the thing that kept me from getting to the point where you are now was having a study partner. We worked on homework at the same time, and had recitation together, so when he turned in his work, I turned mine. It really only takes turning things in a few times to get over the hump.
I think you are doing all the right things in reaching out for help. I agree with xingcat that the next step is turning in, via email, whatever you can turn in right now. Even if turning in by email is not the way you are supposed to turn it in, do it that way first, anyway. If it's handwritten, take pictures with your phone and send them. If it is supposed to be turned in hard copy, send it by email anyway, with a note that you are delivering the hard copy ASAP.
The goal of this is to get it out of your hands. If you've already turned in the email copy, you have nothing to lose by following through and turning it in properly.
I also second the suggestions of getting anxiety-specific support. Anxiety often goes hand in hand with ADHD, and it's worth working on both of them at once.
posted by ocherdraco at 11:02 AM on November 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
For me, the thing that fueled it was the fact that not doing homework (and thus maintaining the old self-conception of worthlessness, inability, and squandered potential) was easier psychologically than entering the scary new world of competence. For me, the thing that kept me from getting to the point where you are now was having a study partner. We worked on homework at the same time, and had recitation together, so when he turned in his work, I turned mine. It really only takes turning things in a few times to get over the hump.
I think you are doing all the right things in reaching out for help. I agree with xingcat that the next step is turning in, via email, whatever you can turn in right now. Even if turning in by email is not the way you are supposed to turn it in, do it that way first, anyway. If it's handwritten, take pictures with your phone and send them. If it is supposed to be turned in hard copy, send it by email anyway, with a note that you are delivering the hard copy ASAP.
The goal of this is to get it out of your hands. If you've already turned in the email copy, you have nothing to lose by following through and turning it in properly.
I also second the suggestions of getting anxiety-specific support. Anxiety often goes hand in hand with ADHD, and it's worth working on both of them at once.
posted by ocherdraco at 11:02 AM on November 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
Perfectionism is an anxiety disorder. Not my particular flavor of anxiety but it does run in my family. It seems to have roots in self-worth as a sabotage tool to keep you from getting something you want (consciously) but don't feel you deserve (unconsciously).
My observation is that anxiety can only exist where beliefs collide. If no conflict exists, anxiety can't be found. There must be conflicting beliefs or objectives for anxiety to thrive.
This goes way beyond a few homework assignments.
posted by trinity8-director at 11:27 AM on November 25, 2014
My observation is that anxiety can only exist where beliefs collide. If no conflict exists, anxiety can't be found. There must be conflicting beliefs or objectives for anxiety to thrive.
This goes way beyond a few homework assignments.
posted by trinity8-director at 11:27 AM on November 25, 2014
The professor is a really reasonable and flexible person and I have contacted him explaining that most of the work is done.
This sounds like a person who wants your imperfect work. The best thing you can do, for your professor, is to give him what you've already put together, flaws and all. That is the assignment. By giving him the imperfect work that you would refine to a better version given infinite time, you are completing the assignment perfectly. If you, for your own benefit, would like to work that draft you've turned in into a more finished format later, you could certainly do so. You could even ask your professor for feedback on how to improve it; I'm sure he'd be happy to oblige. But that's not the task you've been given.
I've known several people like you whose anxious perfectionism obsesses over the perfectness of a work product. It's a really different world from mine; I get really anxious about optimizing my actions, so this kind of downward spiral only hits me if I feel like I've screwed up an interaction with someone. I'm not saying you should substitute one anxiety focus for another, but I would never be comfortable creating more hassle for a professor just because I felt the need to refine things ad infinitum. You might be asymptotically approaching a more perfect assignment, but in terms of meeting the rubric for your behavior as a student, each decision to delay and avoid brings you farther not just from the ideal, but from being seen as a reasonably competent person.
I hope you and your counselor can work together on rebalancing your priorities and realizing that your time and resources are finite, and that you can't be perfect in all areas, you can only make strategic decisions about how you choose to deploy your energy. In the meantime, give your professor what he and the assignment are asking for: imperfect but completed work.
posted by deludingmyself at 11:53 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
This sounds like a person who wants your imperfect work. The best thing you can do, for your professor, is to give him what you've already put together, flaws and all. That is the assignment. By giving him the imperfect work that you would refine to a better version given infinite time, you are completing the assignment perfectly. If you, for your own benefit, would like to work that draft you've turned in into a more finished format later, you could certainly do so. You could even ask your professor for feedback on how to improve it; I'm sure he'd be happy to oblige. But that's not the task you've been given.
I've known several people like you whose anxious perfectionism obsesses over the perfectness of a work product. It's a really different world from mine; I get really anxious about optimizing my actions, so this kind of downward spiral only hits me if I feel like I've screwed up an interaction with someone. I'm not saying you should substitute one anxiety focus for another, but I would never be comfortable creating more hassle for a professor just because I felt the need to refine things ad infinitum. You might be asymptotically approaching a more perfect assignment, but in terms of meeting the rubric for your behavior as a student, each decision to delay and avoid brings you farther not just from the ideal, but from being seen as a reasonably competent person.
I hope you and your counselor can work together on rebalancing your priorities and realizing that your time and resources are finite, and that you can't be perfect in all areas, you can only make strategic decisions about how you choose to deploy your energy. In the meantime, give your professor what he and the assignment are asking for: imperfect but completed work.
posted by deludingmyself at 11:53 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
And for Christ's sake don't even think about doing any work over Thanksgiving until you send him what you've got.
posted by deludingmyself at 11:55 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by deludingmyself at 11:55 AM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
Here's the thing -- your instructors don't expect your homework to be perfect. They are well aware that you have other classes and hopefully other stuff going on in your life.
If a student completely skips a homework set in my class, that gives a very bad impression and also makes me worry that they will get behind and have a really difficult time catching up. But if they turn in say 80% of the problems, eh, I figure they had other stuff going on or didn't get help on a hard problem in time.
As for a proof that's nearly done, but one detail seems off, just make a note of it on your paper. It makes it clear you realize there's an issue and that you're not trying to pull one over on the grader by just glossing over it. No big deal! Plus, if you can pinpoint exactly where you're having trouble, your instructor or grader can probably write you a quick note on the homework that helps you sort it out.
When you start writing research papers, THEN agonize over all the details and get things as perfect as possible. (Even so, in my experience, pretty much every research paper has typos in it, including mine that I reread/edited 30 times.) It's overkill for homework, especially the stressing over LaTeX formatting.
posted by ktkt at 3:00 PM on November 25, 2014
If a student completely skips a homework set in my class, that gives a very bad impression and also makes me worry that they will get behind and have a really difficult time catching up. But if they turn in say 80% of the problems, eh, I figure they had other stuff going on or didn't get help on a hard problem in time.
As for a proof that's nearly done, but one detail seems off, just make a note of it on your paper. It makes it clear you realize there's an issue and that you're not trying to pull one over on the grader by just glossing over it. No big deal! Plus, if you can pinpoint exactly where you're having trouble, your instructor or grader can probably write you a quick note on the homework that helps you sort it out.
When you start writing research papers, THEN agonize over all the details and get things as perfect as possible. (Even so, in my experience, pretty much every research paper has typos in it, including mine that I reread/edited 30 times.) It's overkill for homework, especially the stressing over LaTeX formatting.
posted by ktkt at 3:00 PM on November 25, 2014
I have your problem. A suggestion: give yourself rigid time constraints. Then you're not trying to make it perfect, just as good as one could possibly be expected to do in a given amount of time. As Steve Jobs said, "real artists ship."
(As others noted, there may be anxiety or other issues driving this.)
P.S. I spent 10 minutes tinkering with this comment but now I'm going to hit Post. Hopefully this is good enough.
posted by JackBurden at 4:50 PM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
(As others noted, there may be anxiety or other issues driving this.)
P.S. I spent 10 minutes tinkering with this comment but now I'm going to hit Post. Hopefully this is good enough.
posted by JackBurden at 4:50 PM on November 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
I just successfully defended my Ph.D. dissertation, after having very nearly failed out for reasons much like what you're going through — I'd completed all the classes, done all the research I needed to, but for reasons of perfectionism I couldn't convince myself to send a draft around to my committee. So yes, I have been there, and it came close to ruining a decade or more of my life.
In the long run, okay, yes, see a therapist, read books about perfectionism, contemplate the role this behavior plays in your life, etc etc etc.
In the short run, xingcat's answer is the right one. HIT SEND NOW. Just do it. Proof's missing a few steps? Send it anyway. LaTeX output is still ugly? Send it anyway. Proofs aren't even typed? Bring the handwritten versions to your professor's office. Because in the short run, analyzing your own motives and behavior and wondering why it is that you're procrastinating so hard are just more ways of procrastinating.
Saying "I need to understand why I'm procrastinating so that I can hand this stuff in" is like saying "I need to understand why I'm an alcoholic before I can stop drinking" or "I need to understand why I'm suicidal before I can step down off this ledge." It's getting your priorities backwards. Your immediate need is to back down from the self-destructive behavior — just for right now, taking it one day or one minute at a time — in order to get out of the crisis that you're in. Once you're safe from the immediate risk of failing out of your program, then you can start to contemplate the bigger picture and try to understand how you landed in this mess.
If I were your IRL friend, I would show up on your doorstep, give you a hug, hand you a cup of coffee, sit you down in front of your laptop, and tell you to send at least one thing to your professor right away — no stalling, no editing, no composing a carefully worded email note, just attach the pdf to an email (a blank one if necessary) and hit send. From where I am, I can't make you do it. But it's what you need to do.
posted by nebulawindphone at 7:29 AM on November 26, 2014 [3 favorites]
In the long run, okay, yes, see a therapist, read books about perfectionism, contemplate the role this behavior plays in your life, etc etc etc.
In the short run, xingcat's answer is the right one. HIT SEND NOW. Just do it. Proof's missing a few steps? Send it anyway. LaTeX output is still ugly? Send it anyway. Proofs aren't even typed? Bring the handwritten versions to your professor's office. Because in the short run, analyzing your own motives and behavior and wondering why it is that you're procrastinating so hard are just more ways of procrastinating.
Saying "I need to understand why I'm procrastinating so that I can hand this stuff in" is like saying "I need to understand why I'm an alcoholic before I can stop drinking" or "I need to understand why I'm suicidal before I can step down off this ledge." It's getting your priorities backwards. Your immediate need is to back down from the self-destructive behavior — just for right now, taking it one day or one minute at a time — in order to get out of the crisis that you're in. Once you're safe from the immediate risk of failing out of your program, then you can start to contemplate the bigger picture and try to understand how you landed in this mess.
If I were your IRL friend, I would show up on your doorstep, give you a hug, hand you a cup of coffee, sit you down in front of your laptop, and tell you to send at least one thing to your professor right away — no stalling, no editing, no composing a carefully worded email note, just attach the pdf to an email (a blank one if necessary) and hit send. From where I am, I can't make you do it. But it's what you need to do.
posted by nebulawindphone at 7:29 AM on November 26, 2014 [3 favorites]
Maybe it will help you to read some of the many previous threads about this same thing on AskMe. (One of those is even from the perspective of the procrastinating person's manager.)
posted by anaelith at 4:22 AM on November 28, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by anaelith at 4:22 AM on November 28, 2014 [1 favorite]
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Okay, if you've done that, then figure out what you can finish before the end of this holiday break. The very SECOND you've completed any bit of that homework, turn it in. If it needs to physically be turned in, find a way to mail it.
You need to force yourself into action until you get past the discomfort.
posted by xingcat at 10:09 AM on November 25, 2014 [4 favorites]