Having difficulty figuring out my sexuality, what can I do?
June 25, 2014 9:03 PM   Subscribe

So i've been struggling with the notion that I might be gay, i've never been with a guy before, and have always had an attraction in women, however, I am a little bit shy around girls, which leads me to think I might be gay. What can I do?!

Hey guys, ok so i've always been a little bit shy around girls, but more and more so I haven't had the great luck that I would hope to be having with them. I feel I am a pretty genuinely good looking guy, I'm not ugly by all means (or at least I don't think so), but for some reason, I am shy around girls, and definitely do have trouble getting things started with a girl that I actually really do like.

So I get confused/mixed up, because I am shy with girls, and I have struggled with the fact that maybe I am gay, and that is why I find it so challenging some times. I could never imagine being with a guy, or having any type of sexual encounter with one. But then I do get this creeping feeling of wanting to try to kiss a friend or something ridiculous like that. I don't think I could actually, it'd be way too much.

So how can I become more confident with women so that I don't think I'm gay, or what is the best draw. I had a breakup with someone that I actually and truly loved, and was definitely completely heartbroken about. I haven't been able to commit to anyone since really, or have wanted to commit, and honestly it has been a little bit difficult making myself feel vulnerable again and actually liking them (more so than on a superficial) level. A deeper love.

It's hard to put myself out there for women, for fear of being hurt again I guess. However I am a good looking guy and I want a sexy woman!

Thoughts/Opinions? Thank you so much for your help everyone.
posted by wak5700 to Human Relations (3 answers total)

This post was deleted for the following reason: This doesn't sound like you are gay at all, but having trouble interacting with women, and kind of talks about being gay in a disrespectful way. Maybe try again next week without all the mentions of gayness? -- mathowie

So being shy around women doesn't mean you're gay, it means you're shy around women.

Are you attracted to men? Do you see guys and feel attracted to their physical features? Do you really want to put parts of your body in/on/near parts of their bodies? If yes, then okay, you might be gay.

If not, you're just shy around women and haven't found the right way to approach yet.
posted by erst at 9:06 PM on June 25, 2014 [1 favorite]

Don't forget that bisexuality exists.
posted by librarina at 9:08 PM on June 25, 2014 [2 favorites]

Yea there's definitely no way I want to put any parts of my body in/on/around parts of another mans body. Nor do I want them putting their parts of their body in/on/around parts of my body. I just need to find the right way to approach.
posted by wak5700 at 9:15 PM on June 25, 2014

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