I hate dressing up. There, I said it.
April 2, 2014 10:35 AM   Subscribe

Can I wear these shoes with this dress? To a wedding? On one of those farms specifically made for people to get married at? In Florida? Pictures within.

Apologies in advance: my dog would not leave me alone and all of my mirrors are bacon-shaped.

My cousin is getting married in a couple weeks, and I have zero desire to buy a new dress or new shoes for this. So this is what we've got to work with. I will probably wear these dark blue tights, but am happy to wear literally any color of opaque tights (I will not be bare legged or wear sheer nude hose) you guys tell me to.

These are the shoes I'd like to wear because they're new and I love them. Front, side.

These are the only "classic flats" I have. Front, side.

I also have these. Front.

These are the shoes we have to choose from. (Technically I also have orange ones like the 3rd shoe over and a pair of maroon docs, but even I know those two are probably out.)

Can I wear those brogue boot things I love with this dress? The dress, if you can't tell, is navy blue and linen. I don't know how these things work. I don't know the dressiness level of the wedding, but it is in Florida and on a farm and will be attended by approximately 8 billion people. Things I don't care about: looking taller, looking shorter, shoe vamp, fitting in.

If none of these are ok, please to be linking me some that do. MUST BE FLATS.

Thanks!!
posted by phunniemee to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (46 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
I'd go with the gray flats. The boots are a little clunky for the dress, and I'm not sure if the navy and black actually match. Also seems like they'd be a little hot for Florida weather, but that's your call.
posted by ActionPopulated at 10:40 AM on April 2, 2014 [4 favorites]


Best answer: I think the gray flats are the best classically wedding-appropriate match for the navy dress - gray tights would look cute with these, but if it's a rustic type wedding, tights in rust, mustard yellow, and teal would all look cute.
posted by juniperesque at 10:42 AM on April 2, 2014 [7 favorites]


Best answer: I think those boots look awesome with the dress. The flats and other shoes stand out too much.
posted by Hermione Granger at 10:43 AM on April 2, 2014 [2 favorites]


I'd also go with the lighter flats and a lighter color tights. (It would be best with bare legs, though - are you 100% against that? There's a good chance tights are going to be pretty uncomfortably hot.)
posted by something something at 10:43 AM on April 2, 2014 [3 favorites]


Go without hose, and wear the gray.

You won't want to wear tights outdoors in Florida.
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 10:44 AM on April 2, 2014 [6 favorites]


Best answer: I'm kind of unsure about navy/black, myself, but my first thought was lightening up the tights generally if you're going to wear them, even if it's just to gray, because this looks very somber for an outdoor wedding.
posted by Sequence at 10:44 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I came in to say, flats are dressier, boots are also rad, either way change up the tights.
posted by cabingirl at 10:44 AM on April 2, 2014


Something to consider - it may be at least 80 degrees in Florida in a couple of weeks. Still want to wear the tights? I vote for the grey flats. Have fun!
posted by foxhat10 at 10:45 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


It sounds like this wedding is not excessively formal, since it is on a farm. Also, if there are lots of guests, I doubt anyone will be particularly concerned about what you are wearing unless you show up in, like, a bikini. :) I would say, wear what you like and feel comfortable in...from looking at the photos, I certainly don't think you will look SO out of place that people will be very worried about it.
posted by rainbowbrite at 10:45 AM on April 2, 2014 [4 favorites]


Best answer: Okay, first, OMG, where did you get those grey boots with the ghillie lacing and the holes?

Here is what I would do: I would wear the grey flats because I think those look best with that dress, but I would sneak the boots along in the car and consider changing depending on the vibe of the wedding and the muddiness of the farm. I don't think they go exactly, but I also think that they don't-go in a way that can be passed off as youthful and bohemian.
posted by Frowner at 10:45 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


Definitely no tights in Florida in April! So I say go with the gray.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 10:45 AM on April 2, 2014


Go with the grey flats and skip the tights for reasons stated by others above.

You have excellent taste in footwear.
posted by futureisunwritten at 10:46 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: Thanks for the responses so far! Just to be clear, I will be wearing opaque tights. I am extremely blister and chub-rub-prone and hate being barelegged. I grew up in the south and am aware of how weather works down there. Tights will be happening.
posted by phunniemee at 10:46 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I like the boots. They seem most comfortable and go fine with the dress. Agree on different tights, though.
posted by megancita at 10:51 AM on April 2, 2014


I'd wear the boots. I think tights with flats look weird.

I know you said no bare legs, but for anyone else who is reading: a split slip is a nice way to avoid chub rub hot summer days.
posted by vespabelle at 10:51 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: Okay, first, OMG, where did you get those grey boots with the ghillie lacing and the holes?

Frowner, those would be my foot unicorns. Sadly, a discontinued style and brand. I actually honest to god cried when I realized I'd never be able to buy more. The bottoms of these are patched up with gorilla glue (shhhhh).

posted by phunniemee at 10:52 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: From your post, it sounds like you like the first pair the best...so wear those!

(To be slightly more helpful: I don't think any of the pairs you showed will be inappropriate, and picking a farm for a wedding venue suggests that your cousin is having the kind of wedding where they aren't worried about their guest's shoes.)
posted by tinymegalo at 10:54 AM on April 2, 2014 [5 favorites]


The grey flats are the most wedding-y. But (and maybe it's just me) I'm getting a cool '90's Bridget-Fonda-in-Singles vibe from the dress+boots, and you're super cute and pulling it off, so if you like them, you should rock them. (Would you be up for some kind of cuff or jewelry though? That will pull some of the weight/balance back up from the solid block of boots/tights/dress)
posted by synapse at 10:55 AM on April 2, 2014


For what it's worth, in my family, it would be the boots all the way. In my family, people regularly wear (clear, in good repair) sneakers with their dress clothes to weddings, funerals, and other family occasions, because we all have bad feet, backs, ankles, and hips. So... what are your family norms like? Is Aunt Sue or your mom likely to hound you all day if you wear the boots? What's your tolerance for them doing so versus having comfortable feet?
posted by joycehealy at 11:00 AM on April 2, 2014


As much as I love the boots, they're a little casual for a wedding. The gray flats are your best bet among the shoes you have; lighter tights would help tie the outfit together, and perhaps a bright statement necklace.

If you're willing to run out and get a cheapy pair of flats, get some ballet flats from H&M. I bought a pair of H&M ballet flats for a wedding shoe emergency last year, and they were comfortable and have held up really well. They come in enough colors that you can experiment with mixing and matching your shoes, tights, and dress.

(I think these would be gorgeous with the dress, but you'd probably need to have bare legs due to the peep toe. Though it's probably not the sartorial end of the world to wear peep-toe shoes with tights.)
posted by Metroid Baby at 11:04 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


Best answer: I think you can totally pull off any of the shoes. I actually love the little black and white ones the most but they may clash too much with the navy in real life. "Technically" the black boots and navy is a little bit of a mismatch/"no-no" but sounds like you don't care (and good for you). It looks cute if maybe just not really seasonally appropriate. The gray flats look the most "wedding appropriate" and look the most springy aka season appropriate.

Oh and seconding synapse that you should wear some sort of chunky statement necklace or smaller necklace + cuff to visually balance the heaviness of the dark boot/dark tight combo.
posted by dahliachewswell at 11:06 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I think the boots would work just fine, but I'd pick a different color for the tights (or even one with a subtle pattern -- something like these, even, but you can probably find cheaper tights elsewhere). I think that would make you look a bit fancier but still totally awesome.
posted by darksong at 11:06 AM on April 2, 2014 [3 favorites]


Best answer: HI TRUMAN! your face is the best Has anyone else voted for the black & white shoes? I vote for those. With polka dot tights. Or possibly tights well-matched to the dress.

But I agree with others that you will be fine in the boots that you want to wear. If I were your aunt--and I'm pretty sure I'm old enough and bossy enough to be one of your judgmental aunts--I'd think they were fine. I'd wear brightly colored tights, though. Juniperesque's suggestions include the first colors which came to my mind for those boots with a navy dress, or a really bright fuchsia.
posted by crush-onastick at 11:08 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


I think the grey flats are best.

Please don't wear opaque dark tights with this outfit. Linen* plus opaque dark tights for an outdoor spring wedding in Florida is not really apropos. I think a paler and slightly more sheer or patterened or possibly a subtle/classy fishnet would be better.

On the other hand, I frequently remind myself that weddings are not really about what I am wearing, as a guest. As long as I'm appropriately clothed and at the right formality level for the event, I think that's fine. Nobody's going to be staring at your outfit and judging the summer fabric/winter hosiery effect. And if they are, who cares?

*Linen is usually considered a summer fabric and doesn't go well with winter tights.
posted by Sara C. at 11:16 AM on April 2, 2014 [5 favorites]


Also, as much as I despise that place, the Macy's Water Tower (usually) has an excellent selection of Hue tights in awesome colors and WeLoveColors has polka dot tights in lots of colors.
posted by crush-onastick at 11:16 AM on April 2, 2014


I love the boots with the dress, but I have this 90s vibe about delicate dresses and clunky footwear (not that these are even near clunky, quite honestly; I'm just giving a warning re my aesthetic). I'm with those who think the gray flats stand out too much.
posted by dlugoczaj at 11:18 AM on April 2, 2014


I would chose

(a) The black and white flats. They are super fun and they stand out, but not too much. You've got a solid colour dress, so let your shoes sing a little.

(b) alternatively, if you go with fun pattern tights instead of plain, the grey flats or the boots are fine, more sedate choice.

As others have said, and in my experience, there is a wide variety of attire at weddings these days.
posted by girlpublisher at 11:21 AM on April 2, 2014


The first boots are perfect and adorable. Please wear those.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 11:21 AM on April 2, 2014


If you absolutely HAVE to wear something on your legs, try Silkies 65 Degrees Pantyhose, they're designed for hot weather.
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 11:35 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: Wear the first boots. If you want to look a bit dressier overall, do it with some jewelry and makeup. Sure, the boots may not be classic wedding attire, but you look good. The wedding is on a farm - how formal can it be, right?
posted by ablazingsaddle at 11:40 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I'd go a fun patterned coloured or patterned tight(or both) with the boots. Either go a fun colour or colour combo, or if you like black then maybe one with a nice design. I'd avoid the navy tights with a black outfit at a wedding. Modcloth has some fun tights in all sorts of price ranges but there are plenty more out there.
posted by wwax at 11:43 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I am torn!

I think the first boots are the cutest and suit you best (and you look happiest in that outfit!) but they seem a bit clunky with the dress for a wedding maybe? I think if you wear them with the dark tights it would probably read as "formal" enough and honestly if you feel comfortable you are probably good. I don't have a problem with black and navy together, I think it's fine as long as there's enough contrast that it doesn't look like you tried and failed to match them.

But, the grey ones "go" the best. If you go with this option I would go with coloured tights either in a pastel or a bright colour.

Either way you can probably go pretty bold with jewelry, the clean lines of the dress can carry a lot.
posted by SoftRain at 11:45 AM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: I'd go grey flats and lighter tights, possibly with a chunky necklace matching either the tights or the flats to go with.

For me, I think the first boots, with a dark dress and especially with dark tights to match, would look a little...forgive me...Wednesday Adams. I mean, if goth is your thing then go for it. But while I think you could pull of the boots with that dress on a street in NYC no problem, I think it'd seem a little off at an outdoor wedding in Florida.
posted by Diablevert at 11:46 AM on April 2, 2014 [1 favorite]


Unless your family is extremely fancy there will be people there in jeans and probably shorts and sandals (with and without socks), so you can do whatever you like.

But I love those boots. And those wedding farms are not made for dainty shoes, unless the entire place has been graded and paved, and then it wouldn't be much of a farm.
posted by Lyn Never at 11:48 AM on April 2, 2014


Out of your choices, I'd pick the boots because they're cute and also because I don't like how dark tights look with lighter shoes. (Which means I never wear my cool orange shoes because I feel like all you see is big orange feet.)
Another suggestion: what about footless tights with sandals? Would your feet get sun burned? Maybe bring that option in case it's muddy so you don't ruin the boots.
posted by artychoke at 12:00 PM on April 2, 2014


I'd do grey tights and the grey flats, they're the most wedding appropriate.

(btw, if you ever want to go bare-legged but avoid thighs rubbing together, I highly recommend spanx-type shorts. If you buy a size or two up they are super comfy.)

Your dog is a cutie!
posted by insectosaurus at 12:03 PM on April 2, 2014 [2 favorites]


Best answer: I think the gray shoes with the dark dress and tights look weird and childish, and not at all stylish.

SO! You have my (random internet person) permission to wear those kickass boots. The black and white laceups are also darn cute with the outfit.
posted by JuliaIglesias at 12:04 PM on April 2, 2014


Best answer: Also, the wedding is on a farm. Adorable brogue-y boots plus sweet dress are legitimately appropriate for this.

(sorry, missed the edit window)
posted by JuliaIglesias at 12:11 PM on April 2, 2014 [2 favorites]


Can you take a pic of the dress with the tights and grey flats? I think you at least need lighter tights (or micro-fishnets) if you're going to wear those.

Oops: edited to add - if you're going to wear the grey flats, definitely get lighter tights or some other leg-covering situation. They're too light to wear with the dark tights.
posted by barnone at 12:25 PM on April 2, 2014


Response by poster: Sooooo thanks a lot guys I just bought a whole lot of stuff.

This thing doesn't even start until 8pm and is going to be half in and half out of this climate controlled "barn" place, so I'm not really worried about being hot. I don't wear necklaces, but I DO wear scarves, so I just bought a few brightly colored (fuchsia, lilac, some purplypink thing with navy blue polka dots) gauzy scarf shawl things. I also just spent 60 bucks over at We Love Colors because I decided that the 20 pairs of tights I have at home was incomplete. Got some in coordinating fuchsia and lilac. In 3-5 days I'll know if some sort of coordinating bright tights/scarf thing will work. I'll take a picture when they come in so you guys can tell me what works best.

There are enough pro-boot comments here that I'm feeling much better about that choice. I'll bring the light gray flats just in case my mom flips out and says I look too much like Daria (possible) and play it by ear. If any of you are as in love with those boots as I am, here they are (mine are dark gray and god, they are so comfortable) and GET THIS, GUYS, they came with an extra set of laces and the extra set of laces is light purple colored, so now that I think about that I'm pretty sold on the lilac scarf and tights combo. I like my shoes.

Anyway, thank you! I tend to get really worked up and anxious about places where I have to "look nice" since I tend to go for clunky, bright stuff and short skirts and leggings that are more appropriate for small children, so your feedback helps a lot. :)
posted by phunniemee at 12:44 PM on April 2, 2014 [5 favorites]


Best answer: I don't like the tights to be darker than the gray flats. I like the brogues or booties better, with medium gray or other medium color tights. Be yourself, wear what you think looks good. I'd wear the brogues with patterned tights, if I could find a pair with a not too loud damask or lace pattern.
posted by theora55 at 12:45 PM on April 2, 2014


Response by poster: OK people seriously if you keep linking to wonderful things like the website of all the colors and Rococo leggings I am going to go broke and hold each and every one of you personally responsible.
posted by phunniemee at 12:52 PM on April 2, 2014 [3 favorites]


Best answer: I'm gonna disagree with everyone above and say that the grey flats look least dressy to me. I'd go with the white and black or the boots, with a preference for the white and black on a looks basis, but not discounting that being comfortable and enjoying what you're wearing is pretty key, which is a good argument for the boots.
posted by eviemath at 12:54 PM on April 2, 2014


I just got some purple tights at Target, really on sale because they think winter is over (not in Maine), so maybe go check.
posted by theora55 at 1:22 PM on April 2, 2014


The grey flats won't seem so mega-bright if you wear contrasting tights. Go for somerhing that pops-- a saturated pink or a teal, say. Then you'll bee a wondefully coordinated symphony of color blocks!
posted by palmcorder_yajna at 7:31 PM on April 2, 2014


Response by poster: OK, guys, checking back in way behind schedule, but whatever.

Fuchsia tights, check.
Matching fuchsia scarf with navy blue polka dots to match the dress, check.
I'm coordinating so hard right now, guys.

I think we have a winner! Without scarf and with scarf. (No idea what I'm doing with my hand in that second photo...I think I was gesturing at my scarf.)

Thanks, everybody!
posted by phunniemee at 4:57 PM on April 15, 2014 [1 favorite]


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