Sex-positive resources for a 40-something feminist woman?
January 13, 2014 2:00 PM Subscribe
I'm looking for recommendations for forums, blogs, Tumblrs, whatever that focus on sex-positive content, specifically spaces that are welcoming to feminist women.
I feel that the feminist blogs I am familiar with tend to either avoid sexuality altogether or alternately frame sexual issues almost exclusively around pornography and the "male gaze", stressing the negative.
When I look at other, non-feminist blogs geared to women, the focus often shifts to new motherhood and/or raising kids. Though helpful in the past, I am at a different stage in my life now; my kids are grown.
Where are the women who like sex and don't mind talking frankly about it? The women who enjoy porn as long as no one is being exploited? And who maybe even share helpful advice and links to the good stuff?
Of course, I'm also open to general interest sites where frank sex talk happens. I have no problems with a side order of taters along with my sexysex talk! I'm not squeamish about kinks and fetishes, either (I draw the line at safe, sane and consensual--bestiality or rape, for example, is obviously NOT okay). I have read a number of previous AskMes, though, advising women in general and feminists in particular to steer clear of various general-interest sites like Reddit because they "don't do feminism well".
I would just like to discuss issues related to sex online, without feeling like I have to justify it to anyone on the one side, or fend off come-ons and rape threats on the other extreme. Been there, done that.
I'm also interested in books or other sex-positive material, especially from a woman's POV, that I may not be aware of (say, within the last couple years). Bonus points for post-menopausal references with the same criteria as all of the above.
Thanks!
I feel that the feminist blogs I am familiar with tend to either avoid sexuality altogether or alternately frame sexual issues almost exclusively around pornography and the "male gaze", stressing the negative.
When I look at other, non-feminist blogs geared to women, the focus often shifts to new motherhood and/or raising kids. Though helpful in the past, I am at a different stage in my life now; my kids are grown.
Where are the women who like sex and don't mind talking frankly about it? The women who enjoy porn as long as no one is being exploited? And who maybe even share helpful advice and links to the good stuff?
Of course, I'm also open to general interest sites where frank sex talk happens. I have no problems with a side order of taters along with my sexysex talk! I'm not squeamish about kinks and fetishes, either (I draw the line at safe, sane and consensual--bestiality or rape, for example, is obviously NOT okay). I have read a number of previous AskMes, though, advising women in general and feminists in particular to steer clear of various general-interest sites like Reddit because they "don't do feminism well".
I would just like to discuss issues related to sex online, without feeling like I have to justify it to anyone on the one side, or fend off come-ons and rape threats on the other extreme. Been there, done that.
I'm also interested in books or other sex-positive material, especially from a woman's POV, that I may not be aware of (say, within the last couple years). Bonus points for post-menopausal references with the same criteria as all of the above.
Thanks!
The Pervocracy is smart and funny. A lot of it centers around BDSM and consent, but it's also quite positive.
The Dirty Normal is by a sex educator, quite frank, quite positive, also gets into the science-y side of things a lot.
posted by Ouisch at 2:12 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
The Dirty Normal is by a sex educator, quite frank, quite positive, also gets into the science-y side of things a lot.
posted by Ouisch at 2:12 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
Violet Blue's blog covers news on sexuality, porn, and technology. She often recommends erotica and porn.
posted by sakahane at 2:27 PM on January 13, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by sakahane at 2:27 PM on January 13, 2014 [2 favorites]
This may not be exactly what you're looking for, but I love Hey Epiphora for sex toy reviews written by a sex-positive lady. She is awesome.
posted by sevensnowflakes at 2:36 PM on January 13, 2014 [2 favorites]
posted by sevensnowflakes at 2:36 PM on January 13, 2014 [2 favorites]
Oh Joy Sex Toy is a FANTASTIC webcomic by Erica Moen oriented around sex toys and other sex topics. I love how inclusive it is of different body types and gender expressions.
While I don't hang out enough around Reddit to give any advice, I have heard that there might be subReddits somewhere on there that would fit your description. General Reddit is not all of Reddit. They'd need to be under heavy curation, but they might exist. Maybe someone else would know where those spots would be, or you could try and search for recommendations.
Vagina Pagina on LiveJournal, maybe? It's mostly health oriented but: http://vaginapagina.livejournal.com/
posted by foxfirefey at 4:47 PM on January 13, 2014 [3 favorites]
While I don't hang out enough around Reddit to give any advice, I have heard that there might be subReddits somewhere on there that would fit your description. General Reddit is not all of Reddit. They'd need to be under heavy curation, but they might exist. Maybe someone else would know where those spots would be, or you could try and search for recommendations.
Vagina Pagina on LiveJournal, maybe? It's mostly health oriented but: http://vaginapagina.livejournal.com/
posted by foxfirefey at 4:47 PM on January 13, 2014 [3 favorites]
This essay is a popular read right now.
posted by vitabellosi at 6:17 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by vitabellosi at 6:17 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
Check out erotica authors - Rachel Kramer Bussell, Alison Tyler and a few others come to mind.
I'd link, but my child is decidedly not grown and right next to me...
posted by geek anachronism at 11:00 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
I'd link, but my child is decidedly not grown and right next to me...
posted by geek anachronism at 11:00 PM on January 13, 2014 [1 favorite]
Girl On The Net is feminist and gloriously filthy.
posted by corvine at 1:33 AM on January 14, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by corvine at 1:33 AM on January 14, 2014 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Thanks for the suggestions so far, everyone! I'm avidly checking them out, reading a few posts from each one right now and bookmarking as I go. Keep them coming, please!
posted by misha at 2:06 PM on January 14, 2014
posted by misha at 2:06 PM on January 14, 2014
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by mollymayhem at 2:08 PM on January 13, 2014 [2 favorites]