Therapist/counseller recommendations for Mid Sussex, UK
June 6, 2013 8:55 AM   Subscribe

I urgently need to find a good therapist/counseller in the Mid Sussex region of the UK (ideally in the Haywards Heath area). More details after the break, however I need help dealing with some issues in my marriage, but I don't have a clue how to go about seeking this help. I would ask my GP, however she is on vacation for the next couple of weeks but I need to start getting some help sooner than that.

The reason for the urgency in trying to find help is that in a couple of months time we will be permanently living under the same roof after a long period of separation (for work reasons). The separation period has massively exposed the cracks in our relationship and I want to have as many tools at my disposal for when we are back together permanently so that I can try to do my part to salvage our relationship.

My problems relate to my ability to deal with anger and frustration experienced by both myself and my wife. My marriage is breaking down due my wife's perception of my failings (which may or may not be valid) and my inability to provide the help that she needs, plus a great deal of stress related to her work and other aspects of her personal life. I am also reaching a point where I am finding it very difficult to deal with my failure to reach my wife's expectations and provide the support she needs. We have lost the ability to discuss these issues in a calm and rational manner.

Couples' counselling is not currently an option and is not likely to be an option in the foreseeable future, so the best I can hope for at this point is trying to identify my own personal failings and see how I might adapt my behaviour to account for these. I also need coping strategies to be able to deal with my wife's manifestations of anger and frustration.

On the face of it this is heading for divorce, however, for various reasons, this would very likely be very messy and I want to avoid this at all costs. I just want us to get back to a point where we function like a normal family.

So, can anyone recommend someone to help me?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (4 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
I realise you do not seek couple counselling however Relate should be able to help you .
posted by BenPens at 10:18 AM on June 6, 2013

I can't give a direct recommendation but MIND has a list of useful contacts re: talking treatments and also an info line that you can call for advice. To get counselling on the NHS, you do need to be referred by your GP but they should be able to advise you further about what steps you can take while your GP is unavailable or about going privately.
posted by halcyonday at 1:30 PM on June 6, 2013

It may differ where you are, but in my experience the waiting lists for counselling via a GP referral are very long - up to two years in some cases. They may also not refer you if they see it as a personal rather than a medical/mental health issue. I don't think this is the best option if urgency is an issue.
posted by mippy at 3:34 PM on June 6, 2013

The BACP have a tool to let you search for therapists in your nearby area - this link should show you people within 20 miles of Haywards Heath who have a specialism in relationship counselling.
posted by theseldomseenkid at 1:09 AM on June 7, 2013

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