Where is the real life Rancho Relaxo?
February 18, 2013 6:07 PM   Subscribe

My 40th birthday present to myself is to run away for several days by myself to indulge in restful solitude, nature walks, spa treatments and room service. I live in Oregon and am considering the coast, but could also be talked into Washington/California, or places other than the beach. Price is no object, but would prefer it to be within driving distance of Portland. Requirements and preferences within...

In a perfect perfect world, I would like a solitary space - I'd rather a cabin than a hotel room - close enough to the ocean to hear the waves, but secluded from other people. Actually, I'd love not not to have to see or speak to a single human being the whole time, but will make exceptions for the purchase of goods and services. Things like: healthy meals, bottles of wine and icecream sundaes delivered via room service. Mud baths, facials and massages; saunas and whirlpools. Good places to run, or access to a yoga class(?). I want a fireplace in my room or a personal firepit outside it. And/or a jacuzzi. Preferably and. Beautiful nature if I feel like walking around outside, lots of stars if I just feel like sitting, and a soft fluffy bed if I don't feel like doing either. Bonus if I'm not subjected to other peoples' romantic getaways or conversations with other tourists. Suggestions?
posted by lilnublet to Travel & Transportation (7 answers total) 15 users marked this as a favorite
It would be a bit of a drive, but your description screams Big Sur to me.
posted by cecic at 6:27 PM on February 18, 2013 [1 favorite]

It's not on the coast (which may understandably be a deal-breaker for you), but what about Breitenbush? I can't say they are all about lavish amenities or room service, but the hot springs could be a suitable replacement for the jacuzzi tub and they definitely offer massage/spa relaxation, hiking, yoga, and a peaceful natural setting.
posted by atreyu at 6:39 PM on February 18, 2013

I did something very much like that, cabinwise, in Mendocino (Sea Ranch, actually) for my 40th. Rather than get tendonitis clicking VRBO results, just call real estate, rental management, and janitorial companies in the area. They'll know 10-20 options each.

Oh wait, I just saw the room service part. Price is no object? Post Ranch Inn for sure.
posted by rhizome at 6:48 PM on February 18, 2013 [1 favorite]

Best answer: I stayed at Adrift Hotel and Spa in Long Beach, WA for Christmas/hiding out from the holidays -- I had the same goals, except I was coming from Seattle. Long Beach is across the bay from Astoria and the hotel is right on the beach, just like 3.5 hours from Portland (probably less). You can hear the ocean so clearly it's like being in a shell. Stay on the top floor on the main building, if you go -- get a massage too, because the masseuse was really great! Good food localvore food/bar in the hotel, too, and a picnic basket of breakfast stuff brought to your door in the morning. Beautiful secluded beach there, with a lit up boardwalk, and they provide beach cruisers so you can ride up and down it. We paid to have them build a beach bonfire for us, which was a really awesome "package." Best part? Even though it's a boutique hotel with memory foam beds, organic shampoos and great views, it's really really cheap -- we took the highest priced room available and it was only $125 a night, which allowed us a longer getaway. I didn't hear a soul, either.

The same people own a place next door that seems more remote/retreat like. It's more expensive, though. And no spa or restaurant.
posted by sweltering at 4:40 AM on February 19, 2013 [2 favorites]

Adrift's room service was pretty awesome, too. And there weren't a lot of couples -- a lot of single people with dogs, actually.
posted by sweltering at 4:42 AM on February 19, 2013

Calistoga Ranch popped into my mind.

It's in Napa, so lots of fun wine tasting. You can get a little lodge to yourself.

Frankly, Husbunny and I talk about doing a spa vacation at some point, and this would be perfect. *sigh*
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 6:35 AM on February 19, 2013

> It's not on the coast (which may understandably be a deal-breaker for you), but what about Breitenbush?

Oof, no. No wine, no room service, no luxury, no solitude, no ice cream, no soft fluffy bed, naked hippies everywhere and they all expect you to make conversation about how wonderful it is there. It's fine if that's what you're in the mood for, but sounds like pretty much the opposite of what the OP is asking for.
posted by The corpse in the library at 12:54 PM on February 19, 2013 [1 favorite]

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