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November 9, 2012 2:40 PM   Subscribe

Maggoty Bread that even an Uruk-Hai would love?

A friend is hosting what appears to have become an annual Lord of the Rings marathon (yes, all 3 extended editions). The guests are helping out with the menu.

This year, I've been charged with "maggoty bread" (others are working on taters, rabbit stew -- meat is on the menu, grape tomatoes, apples, lembas, etc.)

I don't want to start an orc riot with my dish, so I'd like it to be yummy (if a little gross to think about). I'm willing to do just about any kind of bread: yeast breads, quick breads, brioches, etc. (but not sweetbreads) I'm thinking the "maggots" could be things like: wild rice, nuts, rosemary, etc.

Nothing in my normal repertoire pops out at me as something that would be perfect, or is close and just needs the addition of whole cashews or something, so I'm turning to the hive.

How would you make "maggoty bread"?
posted by sparklemotion to Food & Drink (22 answers total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
Maybe golden raisins? Not quite as maggoty as cooked white rice but certainly tastier.
posted by elizardbits at 2:42 PM on November 9, 2012

Garlic cloves!
posted by mkb at 2:44 PM on November 9, 2012 [3 favorites]

Cooked basmati rice and caraway seeds, adhered to the top of the hot, finished or almost-finished bread loaf with egg wash, then back into the oven for just long enough to cook and solidify the egg wash.
posted by WasabiFlux at 2:49 PM on November 9, 2012 [2 favorites]

Caramelized onions?
posted by bcwinters at 2:53 PM on November 9, 2012 [5 favorites]

Garlic cloves!

Good idea. Assuming typical cloves, I would cut them into quarters to better approximate a maggot's dimensions.
posted by jedicus at 2:53 PM on November 9, 2012

I like mkb's idea. Check out this recipe for focaccia with garlic cloves.

I hope there's some juicy sweet fish on the menu too!
posted by methroach at 2:58 PM on November 9, 2012

Coconut flakes?
posted by en forme de poire at 3:18 PM on November 9, 2012

Here is a recipe for mealworm banana bread, if you are willing to really commit. You can buy live mealworms at many pet and feed stores. Freeze them overnight and then bake them at 350 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until they are brown and crispy. They are crunchy and nutty, and would complement a soft, sweet banana bread very well.
posted by ecmendenhall at 3:33 PM on November 9, 2012 [12 favorites]

"meat is on the menu"

I'm in love.

How about a simple french or italian bread, carved out, and served with some good sauce and "maggots" of mozzarella cheese. You can create the maggots of cheese by cutting out fresh mozzarella using cookie cutters, so you can get some pretty cool shapes out of them. Alternatively, just roll the fresh cheese into "worms."
posted by thanotopsis at 3:36 PM on November 9, 2012 [2 favorites]

Second the mealworms-- keep a few alive for show & tell.
posted by Sunburnt at 3:36 PM on November 9, 2012

Pine nuts are a maggot substitute I could enjoy without gagging.
posted by Atelerix at 4:08 PM on November 9, 2012

Chopped up hard boiled eggs (white parts only.) Make the bread nice and dark for contrast. The egg bits will look startling but not really taste like anything.

(Please don't use mealworms gaaaaah barf.)
posted by fingersandtoes at 4:11 PM on November 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

Puffed rice looks just like little maggots.
posted by leahwrenn at 4:25 PM on November 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

No idea if this works, but could you bake lots of short strands of spaghetti into, say, a hand-thrown (I.e a lump of) pumpernickel?
posted by cromagnon at 4:33 PM on November 9, 2012

Could you add cooked macaroni or orzo to regular bread dough?
posted by Ignorance at 4:49 PM on November 9, 2012 [3 favorites]

I wonder what happens if you take a piece of string cheese, pull it apart into strings, and bake them into a loaf. I have no idea whether it will work, but it might be something to try.
posted by nebulawindphone at 5:41 PM on November 9, 2012

Not quite bread, but if you want to win you need to find some casu marzu.
posted by porpoise at 6:26 PM on November 9, 2012 [1 favorite]

Orzo in pumpernickel might be a winner. But the mealworms... Hell, I'd do a loaf of that to bring along just for the shock value alone!
posted by caution live frogs at 6:29 PM on November 9, 2012

Oh yeah cooked orzo in black bread would be perfect. Ew!
posted by fingersandtoes at 6:32 PM on November 9, 2012

Pine nuts might work as well.
posted by judith at 8:46 PM on November 9, 2012

Try making a casatiello, there are lots of recipes online.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 7:58 AM on November 10, 2012 [1 favorite]

Wow you guys, mealworms?!*

All of these options were great, thanks so much.

I'm thinking either Orzo or Pinenuts in the Smitten Kitchen's Black Bread recipe will be the way to go. I'll report back (maybe even with pics).

*note that the smitten kitchen recipe makes two loaves, so maybe I will make a "FOR FRODO!" heroic version as well as something that I would eat.
posted by sparklemotion at 7:11 AM on November 12, 2012

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