Help me not open a can of worms.

September 5, 2012 9:13 AM

Can you recommend a reputable adoption blog? (for discussion and self-education)

In particular, I'm interested in how to talk to young children about being adopted, especially if they are interested in learning more about their biological ethnic heritage. Is this controversial? What are the views on it?

Explanation: I'd like to do a FPP about a TV show I saw recently and found fascinating, particularly in how it references adoption. The post is mainly about the show, but I thought they addressed adoption really well. I, however, know next to nothing about adoption and I don't want to offend anyone. I've found some blog posts on the specific show I'm interested in via Google, but they are just personal blogs. They seem to have the same reaction to the show as I do (Hey, neat!) but I'm a little surprised how little I'm finding online about it.

I'm happy to be more specific about the TV show (which again, is the real point of the post, but the adoption angle really does interest me). Also, if you think this is a terrible, terrible idea, do not hesitate to tell me.

posted by maryr to Grab Bag (7 answers total)

I can't recommend any blogs, and it sounds like you'd find reading one interesting in any event, but for your FPP, you can always send a draft post to the mods through the contact form to get feedback. If you tell them what you told us, I'm sure they would be happy to give it a quick read and make suggestions if something seems insensitive.
posted by zachlipton at 9:28 AM on September 5, 2012 [1 favorite]

I think it's a terrible, terrible idea. There is a vast, vast gulf between "our baby is waiting for us" mythology and "adoption abuses two of three parties" and I have yet to see a civil conversation take place between parties not seated on exactly the same square on that continuum. It's a highly emotional and personal topic that basically invites posters who do not support adoption to tell other posters who do "I think the way you formed your family sucks." I would prefer to avoid that.
posted by DarlingBri at 9:30 AM on September 5, 2012

Popehat has an adoption bloglist. (One of the bloggers there has adopted several Korean children.)
posted by Bruce H. at 9:36 AM on September 5, 2012

There are approximately seventy million adoption blogs out there. Most of them have another twist of some sort as well: foster-to-adopt, open adoption, international adoption, SUPER RELIGIOUS SAVING OF CHILDREN adoption, etc. Here are a couple I follow:

- It Only Looks Like I'm In Charge - open adoption, kid's very opinionated and the blog's pretty funny

- Finding Magnolia - international adoption (both of their daughters are from Ethiopia) with an open adoption element. They're in the process of getting their infant daughter healthy enough for major surgery. Lots of discussion of the adoption process, and the author blogs elsewhere about it too.

- Various foster care slash adoption blogs:
- Foster Care: Our Love Story
- Mama Foster (and check out her Foster Blogs page)
- Our Growing Family

I think DarlingBri is right that this will likely be a can of worms either way, but I look forward to reading the post (and maybe the Metatalk afterwards.) You can memail me if you want more suggestions.
posted by SeedStitch at 9:46 AM on September 5, 2012 [1 favorite]

Adoption-related blogs run from "adoption is rainbows and kittens" to "adoption is a bitter blight". It depends on the writer and their personal relationship to adoption. Adoptees and birthparents are under-represented in blogs and media.

You might start with adoption.about.com, but it would help if you could name the show and if you are interested in adoptees, adoptive parents or birthparents.
posted by viggorlijah at 9:48 AM on September 5, 2012

Sorry, that should have read "who do not support adoption or particular forms of adoption."
posted by DarlingBri at 10:11 AM on September 5, 2012

MLJ Adoptions has a long list of blog entries on various adoption topics, including some that you mentioned.
posted by BurntHombre at 10:14 AM on September 5, 2012