What can I do to build my new dog's confidence?
July 22, 2012 5:46 PM Subscribe
Dog filter, we adopted a rescue dog last Sunday and she's great, but I have a couple of questions.
It seems that the newest member of our family was a back yard dog. On our first walk, it became very clear that she hasn't had much exposure to dogs or other people. I've been walking her several times a day and taking her to PetSmart whenever I go to expose her to as many different environments as possible, and she's been great. She doesn't growl and snap at other dogs, but her hackles do go up whenever we pass one. Her ears and tail stay up, so that's good, right? Actually, she's snapped at one dog but that dog started snarling and snapping at her first. She calmed down almost immediately when I stepped in front of her and told her to sit (they were both on leads and didn't get near each other).
She's very submissive and still hits the ground, tail between her legs, when my guy calls her, but I think that's because he's only here in the evening because he's far from dominating. I'm doing my best to build her confidence. My question is, other than daily walks and playing with her, what else can I do to build her confidence?
For example, I don't know when to introduce her to other dogs, like say, at a dog park, or with play dates because I just don't want things to go very wrong. And I'm not sure how she'll react to obedience classes with a lot of dogs and a lot of people (something I'm looking into). I mean, she seems to be friendly with other people and has only shown aggression (from behind me) to a man who just suddenly loomed over her on one of our walks. Any insight would be great.
One interesting tidbit: She was terrified of Mister (who's only ten pounds lighter than she is) for the first day or so and wouldn't even pass him, but they're doing okay now. Mister's stopped growling at her and she's passing him without any signs of submissiveness. That's a good sign, right?
Bonus question: She's a mixed breed, and the paperwork said there's cattle dog in there, but she's about 32 pounds, that's pretty small for cattle dog, isn't it?
It seems that the newest member of our family was a back yard dog. On our first walk, it became very clear that she hasn't had much exposure to dogs or other people. I've been walking her several times a day and taking her to PetSmart whenever I go to expose her to as many different environments as possible, and she's been great. She doesn't growl and snap at other dogs, but her hackles do go up whenever we pass one. Her ears and tail stay up, so that's good, right? Actually, she's snapped at one dog but that dog started snarling and snapping at her first. She calmed down almost immediately when I stepped in front of her and told her to sit (they were both on leads and didn't get near each other).
She's very submissive and still hits the ground, tail between her legs, when my guy calls her, but I think that's because he's only here in the evening because he's far from dominating. I'm doing my best to build her confidence. My question is, other than daily walks and playing with her, what else can I do to build her confidence?
For example, I don't know when to introduce her to other dogs, like say, at a dog park, or with play dates because I just don't want things to go very wrong. And I'm not sure how she'll react to obedience classes with a lot of dogs and a lot of people (something I'm looking into). I mean, she seems to be friendly with other people and has only shown aggression (from behind me) to a man who just suddenly loomed over her on one of our walks. Any insight would be great.
One interesting tidbit: She was terrified of Mister (who's only ten pounds lighter than she is) for the first day or so and wouldn't even pass him, but they're doing okay now. Mister's stopped growling at her and she's passing him without any signs of submissiveness. That's a good sign, right?
Bonus question: She's a mixed breed, and the paperwork said there's cattle dog in there, but she's about 32 pounds, that's pretty small for cattle dog, isn't it?
The first few weeks of having a new dog pass agonizingly slowly! You seem to be a good, proactive dog parent, and a lot of what you're experiencing is just transition time.
Definitely enroll in obedience training. It made a huge difference in my rescue dog - I wish I hadn't waited almost a year! I didn't want to spend a fortune so I just signed up at Petco and actually the trainer was great. My dog is a lot more confident now and it really strengthened our relationship.
One thing that I learned at "school" is that some dogs get really freaked out being on a leash because they feel constrained. Your dog may do better in a supervised off-leash situation.
posted by radioamy at 6:22 PM on July 22, 2012 [1 favorite]
Definitely enroll in obedience training. It made a huge difference in my rescue dog - I wish I hadn't waited almost a year! I didn't want to spend a fortune so I just signed up at Petco and actually the trainer was great. My dog is a lot more confident now and it really strengthened our relationship.
One thing that I learned at "school" is that some dogs get really freaked out being on a leash because they feel constrained. Your dog may do better in a supervised off-leash situation.
posted by radioamy at 6:22 PM on July 22, 2012 [1 favorite]
Best answer: Good for you for getting a rescue dog.
Here are some things that worked for me.
I took dog to the park (where folks walk dogs a lot), a lot, a whole lot, I would have a pocket full of very desirable treats, as we approached another dog I would put a treat in my hand, put it down where she could smell it, and say, over and over again, "walk nice". Her focus was on the treat, we would walk past the other dog, she would get the treat. Now (she's four now) I just say "walk nice" she comes to my side and looks up at me, we walk by the other dog, no problems. Often, when she sees another dog she just comes to my side without a command.
As mentioned above, lots of trips to dog parks where people understand dogs and will help you get a sense of how things are going. There is often a bit of grrrring and dominance stuff that goes on that is perfectly ok.
And, dogs on a leash are very different than dogs off a leash. A leash often creates a sense of tension for dogs and is not a positive thing as you're introducing the pup to another dog.
Have fun, be patient and consistent!
posted by HuronBob at 6:25 PM on July 22, 2012 [3 favorites]
Here are some things that worked for me.
I took dog to the park (where folks walk dogs a lot), a lot, a whole lot, I would have a pocket full of very desirable treats, as we approached another dog I would put a treat in my hand, put it down where she could smell it, and say, over and over again, "walk nice". Her focus was on the treat, we would walk past the other dog, she would get the treat. Now (she's four now) I just say "walk nice" she comes to my side and looks up at me, we walk by the other dog, no problems. Often, when she sees another dog she just comes to my side without a command.
As mentioned above, lots of trips to dog parks where people understand dogs and will help you get a sense of how things are going. There is often a bit of grrrring and dominance stuff that goes on that is perfectly ok.
And, dogs on a leash are very different than dogs off a leash. A leash often creates a sense of tension for dogs and is not a positive thing as you're introducing the pup to another dog.
Have fun, be patient and consistent!
posted by HuronBob at 6:25 PM on July 22, 2012 [3 favorites]
Before enrolling her in a class, talk to the instructor and see if you can get some one on one time - you & the dog with an instructor - before throwing in with a group of untrained dogs and owners.
You might only need an hour total with a good instructor to feel more confident in your handling and then she'll feel more confident in you.
Congrats - she's beautiful!
posted by jaimystery at 6:31 PM on July 22, 2012 [2 favorites]
You might only need an hour total with a good instructor to feel more confident in your handling and then she'll feel more confident in you.
Congrats - she's beautiful!
posted by jaimystery at 6:31 PM on July 22, 2012 [2 favorites]
When introducing dogs, I always do it by walking them both, on lead, but far away enough so they can't interact.
Agreeing with suggesting obedience; especially for cattle dogs. My heeler/shephard mix was a submissive pee-er until obedience class. The class discouraged social interaction with other dogs (it was a school designed for working dogs and high energy breeds like pit bulls and rotweilers). Rather, they encouraged owners to help their dogs focus more on their owners.
Along the way, my dog grew more confident with himself, and more comfortable with other people (especially men, who he responded negatively to previously).
posted by answergrape at 6:55 PM on July 22, 2012
Agreeing with suggesting obedience; especially for cattle dogs. My heeler/shephard mix was a submissive pee-er until obedience class. The class discouraged social interaction with other dogs (it was a school designed for working dogs and high energy breeds like pit bulls and rotweilers). Rather, they encouraged owners to help their dogs focus more on their owners.
Along the way, my dog grew more confident with himself, and more comfortable with other people (especially men, who he responded negatively to previously).
posted by answergrape at 6:55 PM on July 22, 2012
Response by poster: I'll give obedience classes some more thought. And just in case y'all don't click the links... Mister is our cat. I should have pointed that out in original post, but I've posted so often about him, I assumed it was common knowledge (my bad).
posted by patheral at 7:06 PM on July 22, 2012
posted by patheral at 7:06 PM on July 22, 2012
Brandy is so cute!
So when you walk her and take her on outings, what are you doing to reinforce good behavior? HuronBob gives a great example on how to do this.
I recommend you do some reading, and I highly recommend these resources:
Dr. Sofia Yin
Patricia McConnell
I don't know when to introduce her to other dogs, like say, at a dog park, or with play dates because I just don't want things to go very wrong
Take it slow. I have had rescue dogs for the last seven years and it has taken them all varrying amounts of time to settle in and adapt to the flow of our house hold (littelest guy took about six months, biggest guy was a couple of weeks). I would deffinitely take jaimystery's advice to have a 1-on-1 with a trainer before you throw her into an obedience class.
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:07 PM on July 22, 2012
So when you walk her and take her on outings, what are you doing to reinforce good behavior? HuronBob gives a great example on how to do this.
I recommend you do some reading, and I highly recommend these resources:
Dr. Sofia Yin
Patricia McConnell
I don't know when to introduce her to other dogs, like say, at a dog park, or with play dates because I just don't want things to go very wrong
Take it slow. I have had rescue dogs for the last seven years and it has taken them all varrying amounts of time to settle in and adapt to the flow of our house hold (littelest guy took about six months, biggest guy was a couple of weeks). I would deffinitely take jaimystery's advice to have a 1-on-1 with a trainer before you throw her into an obedience class.
posted by OsoMeaty at 7:07 PM on July 22, 2012
Best answer: A lot of the things you describe sound to me like the dog is still working out how it fits in the new family and will settle down with time, when it knows you guys and can trust you and has had more exposure to new places.
Get your guy to sit down on the floor, she's not a biter, so he isn't looming,and call her to him, even if she doesn't get super close he can just throw her treats for coming closer. Have him avoid eye contact, use a higher pitched voice and sort of look at the dog from the side of his eyes not directly, yawning is also a dog signal for defusing tension/displacement activity and showing you mean no harm so have him yawn big jaw stretching yawns while looking away as she approaches. Basically then all his body language will say I do not want to fight I am harmless, have him give her lots of praise and pats and treats whenever she approaches him of her own free will.
Best ways to restore your dogs confidence sound very much like what you are doing now. Take things slow, watch your dog and learn it's body language so you don't push it into a situation it might feel it has to react in, you want lots of positive outcomes from your trips out. Lots of praise and isn't this great fun.
Dog training classes would be really good, if you can go to evening classes with your guy that will help the dog get to know him too. Trainers are used to working scared dogs into class groups, or private lessons usually aren't that expensive and you'd probably only need one or two. The best part is the dog learning what you expect and how to understand what you want it to do will help the dog relax. Cattle dogs love to have a job so you might want to look into agility too as something fun to do with your dog, it really helped our dog gain a tonne of confidence.
When introducing dogs on leads it's best not to let them approach head on, dogs sort of like to come up sideways to each other when greeting new dogs, so don't force them to go head to head and that is very aggressive in dog body language.
posted by wwax at 7:07 PM on July 22, 2012
Get your guy to sit down on the floor, she's not a biter, so he isn't looming,and call her to him, even if she doesn't get super close he can just throw her treats for coming closer. Have him avoid eye contact, use a higher pitched voice and sort of look at the dog from the side of his eyes not directly, yawning is also a dog signal for defusing tension/displacement activity and showing you mean no harm so have him yawn big jaw stretching yawns while looking away as she approaches. Basically then all his body language will say I do not want to fight I am harmless, have him give her lots of praise and pats and treats whenever she approaches him of her own free will.
Best ways to restore your dogs confidence sound very much like what you are doing now. Take things slow, watch your dog and learn it's body language so you don't push it into a situation it might feel it has to react in, you want lots of positive outcomes from your trips out. Lots of praise and isn't this great fun.
Dog training classes would be really good, if you can go to evening classes with your guy that will help the dog get to know him too. Trainers are used to working scared dogs into class groups, or private lessons usually aren't that expensive and you'd probably only need one or two. The best part is the dog learning what you expect and how to understand what you want it to do will help the dog relax. Cattle dogs love to have a job so you might want to look into agility too as something fun to do with your dog, it really helped our dog gain a tonne of confidence.
When introducing dogs on leads it's best not to let them approach head on, dogs sort of like to come up sideways to each other when greeting new dogs, so don't force them to go head to head and that is very aggressive in dog body language.
posted by wwax at 7:07 PM on July 22, 2012
Best answer: She doesn't growl and snap at other dogs, but her hackles do go up whenever we pass one. Her ears and tail stay up, so that's good, right?
The hackles up are obviously not good, but the ears and tail up could be bad too, if she's staring at/fixated on the other dog. You're looking for the ears and tail to be in a relaxed position - if you are coming up on another dog, you'll want her attention focused on you and not fixated on the other dog. I often have my dogs sit nicely and take treats while other dogs pass by, or at least keep a treat in my hand and have them look at me as we walk by.
Your photo captions seem to indicate she's unsure when you call her, so I would do training exercises with her where you say her name and then give her a treat. Then work on teaching come, with treats too. Both of these will build trust and have her associate you and her name with good things.
We took our first rescue dog to a course for shy and insecure dogs - lots of it was basic obedience, which we needed, but the best stuff was the agility training. Our dog really took to it (anything for freeze-dried liver!), and the fun we all had really helped us bond.
posted by Squeak Attack at 9:05 PM on July 22, 2012
The hackles up are obviously not good, but the ears and tail up could be bad too, if she's staring at/fixated on the other dog. You're looking for the ears and tail to be in a relaxed position - if you are coming up on another dog, you'll want her attention focused on you and not fixated on the other dog. I often have my dogs sit nicely and take treats while other dogs pass by, or at least keep a treat in my hand and have them look at me as we walk by.
Your photo captions seem to indicate she's unsure when you call her, so I would do training exercises with her where you say her name and then give her a treat. Then work on teaching come, with treats too. Both of these will build trust and have her associate you and her name with good things.
We took our first rescue dog to a course for shy and insecure dogs - lots of it was basic obedience, which we needed, but the best stuff was the agility training. Our dog really took to it (anything for freeze-dried liver!), and the fun we all had really helped us bond.
posted by Squeak Attack at 9:05 PM on July 22, 2012
Response by poster: Ah, I should be clearer in the photo captions. She's uncertain when I call her name and point the phone at her because she doesn't know whether to come to me or stay where she is. She's more than happy to come when I call her, but if I just say her name to get her attention while pointing the phone at her, she gets that uncertain look on her face (or walks away).
Her body language when we pass other dogs is more alert than aggressive, I think. Her ears and tail are relaxed but her hackles are raised. She'll look at the dogs, but she's not fixated. If I call her name and keep walking, she'll look away and walk with me. It was just the one time when the other dog lunged at her that she got aggressive. The few times I've stopped to talk to other dog owners with well behaved dogs on the trail (at a safe distance) she hasn't growled or barked (she hasn't barked at all since we've gotten her actually) or acted aggressive toward them, but she'll put me between her and them.
posted by patheral at 9:27 PM on July 22, 2012
Her body language when we pass other dogs is more alert than aggressive, I think. Her ears and tail are relaxed but her hackles are raised. She'll look at the dogs, but she's not fixated. If I call her name and keep walking, she'll look away and walk with me. It was just the one time when the other dog lunged at her that she got aggressive. The few times I've stopped to talk to other dog owners with well behaved dogs on the trail (at a safe distance) she hasn't growled or barked (she hasn't barked at all since we've gotten her actually) or acted aggressive toward them, but she'll put me between her and them.
posted by patheral at 9:27 PM on July 22, 2012
Find out what motivates her. Some dogs are food motivated, others live toys, some like praise. My dog only cares about treats. Figure that out and you'll know how to shape her behavior with rewards. She'll gain confidence as she learns your rules and understands how to get the rewards she wants.
posted by blue_beetle at 9:42 PM on July 22, 2012
posted by blue_beetle at 9:42 PM on July 22, 2012
Choose a positive methods obedience class, nothing with corrections (no choke chains or prong collars), but definitely get into a class asap. There is no single better way to build a good relationship with your dog than training. A clicker tricks class or something like that is also a great idea. Agility is awesome for building confidence also.
And yes, give her some time, it can take months for a dog to truly settle in (be prepared for backsliding when it comes to training, be patient and fair). Good luck!
posted by biscotti at 5:26 AM on July 23, 2012
And yes, give her some time, it can take months for a dog to truly settle in (be prepared for backsliding when it comes to training, be patient and fair). Good luck!
posted by biscotti at 5:26 AM on July 23, 2012
Thank you and kudos for adopting this dog. She looks like she really needs a good home and lots of love. Patience would be key and she will gradually learn to trust you and her surroundings more. Right now she doesn't have the experience of permanency so it will take some time. Too much training too soon might be a little tricky but if it is done gently she will respond.
posted by pakora1 at 7:35 AM on July 23, 2012
posted by pakora1 at 7:35 AM on July 23, 2012
Response by poster: Okay, so complication... we're closing on a house soon and hope to be moving in a couple of weeks. I know, not the best time to get a rescue dog, but she was just too darned adorable to not get, and she and I have this connection. She hardly ever leaves my side. How could I have left her in that cage?? Anyway, should I put off enrolling in obedience training until *after* we've all settled down in the new place? That's the route I was thinking. The house we're moving too isn't far, but our walking route will change, as will her habitat. I'm afraid of overwhelming her.
Also, some time down the road, after we get some basic training done, I have this vague idea of making her something of a service/therapy dog for me. The government may not think I'm disabled, but I know I have my limitations, and having her do things like get my puffer when I have an asthma attack, or pick up small things when I drop them would be very helpful. I mention this because someone mentioned agility training, and I thought that would be good for her rather than agility training, and good for me as well.
posted by patheral at 9:47 AM on July 23, 2012
Also, some time down the road, after we get some basic training done, I have this vague idea of making her something of a service/therapy dog for me. The government may not think I'm disabled, but I know I have my limitations, and having her do things like get my puffer when I have an asthma attack, or pick up small things when I drop them would be very helpful. I mention this because someone mentioned agility training, and I thought that would be good for her rather than agility training, and good for me as well.
posted by patheral at 9:47 AM on July 23, 2012
I trained my rescue dog to be a therapy dog, but it took a lot of time. The training itself wasn't difficult, but it took about 6 months of building her confidence before her personality really started to come through. She was obviously mistreated and we had to build a lot of trust, mostly just spending time together and lots of cuddles and walks. I never took her to classes or anything, but I would recommend that if you aren't familiar with training techniques.
I think your plan to wait for training until after the move is a good one. That's a lot of adjustment for a dog to go through. I also think you have realistic goals (getting your inhaler, picking things up) and you should just heap praise on her when she does well. I really like The Art of Raising a Puppy by the Monks of New Skete. Good luck and congrats on your rescue!
posted by kamikazegopher at 9:58 AM on July 23, 2012
I think your plan to wait for training until after the move is a good one. That's a lot of adjustment for a dog to go through. I also think you have realistic goals (getting your inhaler, picking things up) and you should just heap praise on her when she does well. I really like The Art of Raising a Puppy by the Monks of New Skete. Good luck and congrats on your rescue!
posted by kamikazegopher at 9:58 AM on July 23, 2012
I'd want to keep as many other things as possible routine when you move to try and ease some of the stress when you move. So keep dinner time the same, walk time the same that she has the same bed and toys out as soon as you get there, that sort of thing. She will most likely show signs of stress when you move and might have a few behaviour hiccups (toilet training springs to mind so keep that routine carved in stone if nothing else), but reassure yourself it's a hundred times better than the stress she would have felt if left in a kennel.
I suggested agility because that's what worked for us with our rescue dogs, but Service training sound like a great idea, really any activity where you are having fun with your dog and both learning new things in a fun positive way will be nothing but good for both of you. Clicker training might be something you want to look into for training to get puffers and pick things up and there are lots of great videos on Youtube and books on the subject.
posted by wwax at 10:47 AM on July 23, 2012
I suggested agility because that's what worked for us with our rescue dogs, but Service training sound like a great idea, really any activity where you are having fun with your dog and both learning new things in a fun positive way will be nothing but good for both of you. Clicker training might be something you want to look into for training to get puffers and pick things up and there are lots of great videos on Youtube and books on the subject.
posted by wwax at 10:47 AM on July 23, 2012
Response by poster: I'm not sure if it's clear by her pictures or if I should have mentioned this before, but Brandy is around two years old according to her paperwork, so she's not really a puppy. She's pretty much house broken. We did have a couple of mishaps when she first came to stay with us, but nothing in the past four or five days, so hopefully we're good on that for now. I take her for a long walk in the morning and a couple of short walks during the day, and my guy walks her around the block in the evening and takes her out (just in case) before he goes to bed.
In our new house, she'll have a huge fenced back yard to go out in whenever she likes, but she'll still get walked at least twice a day (early morning and early evening because it's way hot in New Mexico during the day).
posted by patheral at 12:33 PM on July 23, 2012
In our new house, she'll have a huge fenced back yard to go out in whenever she likes, but she'll still get walked at least twice a day (early morning and early evening because it's way hot in New Mexico during the day).
posted by patheral at 12:33 PM on July 23, 2012
One thing which has really resonated with my adoption of a rescue dog (and seeing my friends go through it recently) is that, even though he's wasn't a puppy, in some ways he really was about at the level of a puppy. Just things like making eye contact, listening or reacting to me - were things that he's not as good at as a 'normal' adult dog.
I found Patricia McConnell really good at explaining this dynamic especially her blog entry on human expectations of adult dogs vs. puppies, and her (pdf) article about adopting a new adult dog.
Another thing I had to adjust to is how slow his progress is. I mean, he's smart and willing but he still takes weeks to pick something up and that's if I'm religious about practising it (which I am not usually). I read somewhere that it will take 4-6 weeks to get a behaviour down. That somehow makes me much less frustrated with the process - probably because I realize how normal my dog is (in spite of being a scary-cat princess of a dog).
With regards to a class, I kind of lean towards starting now before you move because I think getting some tricks/behaviours down (and the reward process), Brandy will get more confidence which should enable her to bear the change of living conditions better. Or at least this is my theory. I'm about to move cross-country with my dog and I'm working on all his commands so that if he gets stressed, I can just put him through a series of basic commands to distract him from his stress.
Good luck! She's a cutie.
posted by hydrobatidae at 1:46 PM on July 23, 2012
I found Patricia McConnell really good at explaining this dynamic especially her blog entry on human expectations of adult dogs vs. puppies, and her (pdf) article about adopting a new adult dog.
Another thing I had to adjust to is how slow his progress is. I mean, he's smart and willing but he still takes weeks to pick something up and that's if I'm religious about practising it (which I am not usually). I read somewhere that it will take 4-6 weeks to get a behaviour down. That somehow makes me much less frustrated with the process - probably because I realize how normal my dog is (in spite of being a scary-cat princess of a dog).
With regards to a class, I kind of lean towards starting now before you move because I think getting some tricks/behaviours down (and the reward process), Brandy will get more confidence which should enable her to bear the change of living conditions better. Or at least this is my theory. I'm about to move cross-country with my dog and I'm working on all his commands so that if he gets stressed, I can just put him through a series of basic commands to distract him from his stress.
Good luck! She's a cutie.
posted by hydrobatidae at 1:46 PM on July 23, 2012
Response by poster: I really appreciate everyone's input. I tried distracting Brandy with treats on our walk this morning, but my arms are way too short to hold a treat in front of her nose while walking. So what I did instead was call her to me and tell her to "sit" with treats whenever she started getting her hackles up on a nearby dog. That worked wonders, and I actually got to converse with two elderly ladies and their toy poodle without incident. If the dogs are further away and she looks at them, we just continue walking like it's no big thing.
My guy and I talked about obedience training, and he's of the opinion that we should wait until we're all moved in and settled down. He wants everyone, including Brandy and Mister, to be comfortable in the new home before we throw anything new into the mix. I'm inclined to agree with him.
Thanks again for the advice, everyone.
posted by patheral at 10:26 AM on July 24, 2012
My guy and I talked about obedience training, and he's of the opinion that we should wait until we're all moved in and settled down. He wants everyone, including Brandy and Mister, to be comfortable in the new home before we throw anything new into the mix. I'm inclined to agree with him.
Thanks again for the advice, everyone.
posted by patheral at 10:26 AM on July 24, 2012
This thread is closed to new comments.
Try an obedience class, she may thrive in a group of other dogs. She's still sussing out the hierarchy at your house and in the world. Give her time to adapt and get used to the gang.
Once you've seen how she is in a group of other dogs, try a dog park or doggie day care. A doggie day care has people who can help her socialize with other dogs and who know dogs well enough to sense when things are going pear-shaped and who can step in effectively.
Enjoy your puppy!
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 6:07 PM on July 22, 2012