Make like a horseshoe crab
July 6, 2012 5:47 AM   Subscribe

Good places to have sex on the beach within an hour of Boston?

It's summer! A young woman's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of getting screwed on the beach. Newish to New England and don't know all the good places to duck in for a little private time. Help a girl out, MeFi!

Pluses: secluded, sand (I know, I know), accessible after dark, free parking relatively nearby.

If you don't want to reveal your favorite love nest to the whole world, please kindly MeMail me, or send to Discretion assured.

Any other good beach lovin' tips and suggestions welcome also!
posted by Lola Xaviera Boom-Boom McPuppet to Travel & Transportation around Boston, MA (8 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite

Consider doing it in a tent on the beach. Solves a number of issues.
posted by Mercaptan at 8:42 AM on July 6, 2012 [2 favorites]

I remember the beach near the Nauset lighthouse having very few other people on it after hours. Might be a bit longer of a drive than you require, though.
posted by univac at 9:14 AM on July 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Don't do it at Castle Island in South Boston! The police are down there lately like woah!
posted by floweredfish at 9:17 AM on July 6, 2012

Secluded, accessible after dark, and parking nearby: pick any two.

Yeah, welcome to crowded New England, which means that part of the challenge (and fun) of this exercise is that if it's easy to get to, you're likely to have company, at least near Boston. If it's secluded, you're probably not supposed to be there at night and any beach parking lot will be gated and locked. That said, I've never done this, and I'm only familiar with a handful of the area beaches, mostly North Shore, but this is where I'd want to go, in descending order:

Crane Beach, Ipswich. Very secluded, because it closes at sunset and they lock up the parking area. 4 miles down a narrow road from the town center. Parking on the side of the road near the gate is very much at your own risk.

Singing Beach, Manchester-by-the-Sea. You can park at the MBTA commuter rail lot and walk half a mile to the beach. I think you can waltz right in any time day or night, but not so secluded-- near town and there are cliff houses at either end of the beach.

Walden Pond. Closed after sunset but very easy to sneak in. You'll be ticketed if you try to park on the side of the road anywhere nearby. Park on one of the residential streets on the other side of Route 2, about a mile away. Some chance of encountering youngsters drinking, swimming, or smoking pot. Walk around the pond and maybe find a hidden spot in the trees.

Also. If you really want privacy, go in April. Go in October. Do it shivering with your clothes on, because there's nothing more New England than that. Go to Crane Beach in May or September, two hours before sunset, and walk until you're worried about getting back to the car in time. There's a good chance you'll be the last two people out there.
posted by Dixon Ticonderoga at 9:39 AM on July 6, 2012

Seconding Walden.
posted by feistycakes at 12:18 PM on July 6, 2012

Not a beach and it costs some money but you can have a private dinner at the top of the Newburyport Lighthouse. You get it all to yourself for a couple hours once they deliver the food.

Wink wink, nudge nudge.
posted by bondcliff at 12:21 PM on July 6, 2012

Parking will be hard at both crane and Manchester by the sea. Also both of ipswich and manchester have hyperactive cops and vigilant residents. Manchester is not very secluded. Private residences are at the beach.

I can't think of a good place, really other than something on the cape cod shoreline. You'd want to be off season so you can park. That's federal land so you may be in serious trouble if you get caught.

My advice: go somewhere with warmer weather and less guarded beach. Don't do anything illegal. Repercussions could include incarceration and registration as a sex offender.
posted by shushufindi at 3:35 PM on July 6, 2012 [1 favorite]

Rent a boat, plenty of secluded beaches available via boat.
posted by evilelf at 6:07 PM on July 9, 2012

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