Wear my ring around my neck?
April 22, 2012 6:25 AM   Subscribe

I'm about to get married and can already anticipate times in which I will not want the ring on my hand (like when I'm whitewater kayaking, for fear of losing it), but I'll still want it with me. I'm thinking maybe I'll get a simple, sturdy necklace and a little clip of some kind. Any suggestions for said necklace and/or clip? Also will the stainless clip damage 18k gold?
posted by SampleSize to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (18 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
I can no longer wear my rings due to a health issue. I used a military issue vintage dog tag chain for mine. It scratched the interior a little, but that chain was NOT coming off. Not the most feminine accessory, either, but my rings were too important to me to risk losing. I used this for kayaking (before I got ill) and it worked great.

But then I stopped, because there's apparently a tradition in which widows wear their rings on necklaces; I'd received one too many expressions of sympathy from strangers, sometimes with my living husband standing next to me. So you may want to consider tucking the chain under your shirt. ;-)
posted by theplotchickens at 6:43 AM on April 22, 2012

I wouldn't use a clip, that just adds one more point where the ring could fall off or be lost. When I do this, I just string the chain through the ring. If the chain is long enough, I can't miss it falling off, and that's the only way the ring is going anywhere.
posted by lemniskate at 6:53 AM on April 22, 2012 [9 favorites]

Doesn't directly answer your question, but FWIW... I dealt with a similar concern by having a rather inexpensive band that I wear when I don't want to worry about losing/damaging my diamond ring. If something happens to it, it's not the end of the world. You could probably pick one up second hand or get one made out of an alternative metal for pretty cheap.
posted by jshort at 7:01 AM on April 22, 2012

Response by poster: Yup - it will definitely be tucked under gear and shirt. I'm a guy, BTW. Keep em comin!
posted by SampleSize at 7:19 AM on April 22, 2012

Best answer: I think a ring (that fits) on the hand is better than a necklace. Necklaces aren't as a reliable in my experience. I am a woman and have worn my platinum wedding band and diamond engagement ring for 13 years without ever removing them. I kayak often. Granted, I kayak on flat water, though I have ocean kayaked numerous times and my rings never came off. I am rough on my hands. My husband has a platinum band and kayaks as well and works with his hands. He has never taken his ring off and it has never fallen off. I would think any necklace that isn't too long and has a sturdy clasp will do. I would rather leave my band at home than string it on a necklace. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.
posted by Fairchild at 7:35 AM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]

I've been wearing a medic-alert tag on one of those bead/ball and socket necklaces, 24/7 for the last 10 years. They're durable, and I would think you'd lacerate your neck before the chain would break.
posted by crunchland at 7:49 AM on April 22, 2012

Unromantic, perhaps, but I have a wallet with a zipper compartment.
posted by gerryblog at 7:49 AM on April 22, 2012

I have to agree with fairchild, a well fitted band will not fall off. My husband, when we first got married, took his band off whenever there was the slightest risk of the ring getting wet. As a consequence it got lost a lot because he would forget where he put it for safekeeping. I think a lot of men are unaccustomed to wearing rings, and don't have a sense of how well a proper fit can keep a ring secure between the knuckle and the padding of the lower joint. Unless you lose a ton of weight, that fit should stay secure for years. You might just practice getting comfortable by wearing it to wash dishes, or to shower.
posted by pickypicky at 7:56 AM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]

Yeah, we wear ours all the time and I can't imagine they would just slip off. The only time we remove them is when we're cooking something gross (and we have a special plate in our kitchen that my aunt got us for our wedding where we put the rings so we know where to find them).
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 8:10 AM on April 22, 2012

Don't know if you have a lot of experience wearing necklaces, but they can definitely come off over your head in strenuous situations, as well as break. I lost a very special pendant that had belonged to my mother when a necklace chain broke in the woods and I didn't notice.

Like others have said, I think the clip is a bad idea when you can just thread the chain through the ring. And if you want to be extra safe, use two chains of the same length, so if one breaks, the other is still there. Plus they will be more likely to get tangled up on you if they start to pull up over your head.
posted by bookish at 8:18 AM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]

Nthing again that a well fitting ring will NOT come off your finger.

After I got my engagement ring I took it to a jewelry store and they sized it correctly for me. It takes a good amount of twisting and tugging to get it off, but at the same time it is very comfortable while it's on. I would strongly encourage taking a trip to a good jewelry store and having them adjust the sizing for you -pretty much any store will do it for you even if the ring wasn't bought there. That's going to be more secure than a necklace which could slip over your head (that is what I would worry about more than the chain breaking).

I'm envisioning the sailing tumbles I've taken into rough water, and when you're kind of somersaulting through water I would worry that a chain could slide over your head even if it started under your shirt. But a ring should stay put on your hand pretty well, even in cold water.
posted by lyra4 at 8:19 AM on April 22, 2012

Here's another voice saying your ring shouldn't come off. Mr Corpse's fit when we bought it; my finger was between sizes so I had it resized by the jeweler. We bought ours at a fancy-pants jewelry store but I imagine any decent jeweler could do that for you. We both keep our rings on all the time, including swimming, running, all that stuff.
posted by The corpse in the library at 8:23 AM on April 22, 2012

Response by poster: Ok, well...I guess I will just keep it on my finger then, testing it out with dishes etc. first. Maybe I'll stick my hand in some ice water for a while just to see how loose it gets. It is indeed sized properly, and the jewelry store will give me one free additional sizing if needed. Thanks!
posted by SampleSize at 8:32 AM on April 22, 2012

I never wear a wedding ring at all. You don't have to keep one with you at all times. Its presence or absence has no bearing on the quality of your marriage. You can just leave it on your nightstand when you go on kayaking trips.
posted by tylerkaraszewski at 8:38 AM on April 22, 2012

Response by poster: Sure, I know that...but I want to wear it. I want to see it on my hand and think of her. Maybe at some point that well change, but for now I really like the idea of always having it with me.
posted by SampleSize at 9:24 AM on April 22, 2012 [5 favorites]

not exactly wearing it, but one place you can easily put it that you are very unlikely to lose it is on your keyring. Unless you're prone to losing your keys... (May not be an issue for you, but there a lot of martial arts that don't let you wear jewelry)
posted by ansate at 9:46 AM on April 22, 2012

Best answer: FWIW, I'm a whitewater kayaker and I always wear one of two rings. I have ~300 river days, including a lot of swimming and below-freezing air temps. They are low-profile enough to not affect my grip on the paddle, and at this point, I'm not at all worried about losing one.
posted by Metasyntactic at 9:51 AM on April 22, 2012

Best answer: I've been wearing the same wedding band for 42 years. Through army basic training, 11 marathons, hundreds of miles of rowing and kayaking, swimming, snorkeling, greasy auto projects, house demolition ... a lifetime of stuff. A properly-fitted ring will NOT fall off.
posted by birdwatcher at 2:23 PM on April 22, 2012 [1 favorite]

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