Gifts for Orthodox Jewish baby?

December 28, 2011 6:25 PM

Gifts for Orthodox Jewish baby?

My next door neighbors are Orthodox Jews. They recently had a baby (girl, third child) and our family is looking to get them a little something. They gave us a nice gift of some clothes when our twins were born, and we would like to reciprocate, but I want to give something appropriate and respectful. The father is a Rabbi and he would generally be my go-to guy for any questions of this nature, but since it pertains to his family, that is not an option.

posted by horsemuth to Human Relations (11 answers total)

I would stay away from food (unless you have a great Kosher deli that can provide packaged prepared food). Also, some stuffed animals are not great because they represent non-Kosher animals.

Clothes would be a nice neutral gift, or an infant toy. Avoid presenting the gift on Friday after sundown or Saturday before sundown as it is Shabbat and they will be busy / unable to do some things. The baby will probably not be publicly named until next Shabbat.

I'm sure that they will appreciate your thoughtfulness!
posted by charmcityblues at 6:34 PM on December 28, 2011

I would largely ignore the Orthodox Jew Baby angle. They surely don't need you to get them a baby kippah/yarmulke, and the parents will make sure the girl is raised the way they want her to be in the faith. Don't get baby food that includes bacon or anything, but you should be 100% fine with baby clothes.

I also think a toy would be fine -- just get something that's not obnoxious. If you are concerned with stuffed animals that aren't kosher (or are representation of animals that aren't kosher), get a stuffed deer or sheep (lamb) or duck or something -- just google up the kosher status of the particular option you see. I'm not sure that's really an issue, since as I understand it the prohibition is on eating (not on owning representations), but that could be a personal issue with your friend and we don't have any way of knowing where he comes out.
posted by J. Wilson at 6:47 PM on December 28, 2011

You could donate to the temple in the baby's name, maybe with the donation of some prayerbooks.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:13 PM on December 28, 2011

Odds are good that your neighbors already have tons of baby clothes and the needed items via the older siblings, plus, the Orthodox community is really serious about sharing baby goods. If you know the baby's name, though, I'd encourage you to get the baby something special with her name on it, since that's something special just for her.

Having a tree planted in her name in Israel is a standard JNF gift and is welcome by most all Orthodox families joyfully.
posted by juniperesque at 7:18 PM on December 28, 2011 [2 favorites]

Yeah, a stuffed animal should be fine -- sure, avoid a stuffed pig or lobster or cheeseburger, but horses and rabbits aren't kosher and I don't think there's any prohibition about a stuffed horse, or a stuffed bunny or camel or whatever -- or my favourite gift, a hooded towel. I would imagine that with their congregation, they'll get lots of baby clothes (both new and secondhand). Tree planting (as I see juniperesque mentioned on preview) is also a nice gift.
posted by jeather at 7:21 PM on December 28, 2011

The stuffed animal/animal toys thing is particular to the Chabad/Lubavitch sect, and observed in different ways and to different extents by different families. That's why so few of you have heard of it. There's more than you want to know about it here.

I would also avoid things with an angel motif, not because of prohibitions but because Orthodox Jews don't really seem into that (I guess it's kinda Christian, in a way.) Other than that plus no food, I think you'll be fine.
posted by needs more cowbell at 7:35 PM on December 28, 2011

Savings bond or engraved silver(plated) baby cup are nice gifts.
posted by theora55 at 9:56 PM on December 28, 2011

Having a tree planted in her name in Israel is a standard JNF gift and is welcome by most all Orthodox families joyfully.

With respect, I would tread carefully here. This gift has a sort of political tinge and has the ability to go awry.
posted by threeants at 10:21 PM on December 28, 2011

Books! I can't imagine a family of any faith that wouldn't welcome a children's book that they could read to their baby to put her to sleep at night. Pick a book that you or your children really liked. And yes, get books for the older kids too, in case they're feeling left out, to let them know that their growing family is a celebration for them too.
posted by decathecting at 11:30 PM on December 28, 2011 [4 favorites]

threeants: With all due respect, the JNF tree has no political tinges and is an environmental gift. No Jewish person I know, even those who oppose the state of Israel, has ever knocked the standard tree. It's quite "safe." You get a certificate that shows the location of your tree. Many Jewish families keep these in a box together and, if traveling to Israel, go check out their tree(s). I do not know of an Orthodox sect - and I am familiar with most flavors - who would be offended politically by the tree.

Be aware that if you get them at eating vessel (like a cup or spoon) it is likely going to be used sparingly as most observant Orthodox families have separate sets of eating vessels for milk versus meat dishes.

Books are a safe bet.
posted by juniperesque at 5:53 AM on December 29, 2011 [1 favorite]

A nice pretty blanket or a nice toy. You can get all sorts of lovely toys for babys that are abstract shapes and colours designed to "stimulate" them I'm not sure if they work but they are my stand by sort of present for new borns. If it's their first girl then some pretty girls clothes might be appreciated, a cute winter hat or booties maybe.
posted by wwax at 8:49 AM on December 29, 2011