How to have vaginal sex with an obese man?
July 25, 2011 4:58 PM   Subscribe

Sexual positions for the obese.

My husband is obese, close to 600 lbs. I am much smaller than him and very limber. We have been married for ten years and in that time we have never had intra-vaginal sex that lasts longer than three minutes.

We have attempted to have sex with me on top facing forward and backward but due to his size I frequently slip off of him or my hips begin to hurt from trying to wrap my legs around him. We have tried to do it doggy-style so that his stomach can rest on my back (vaginal and anal) but he lacks physical endurance and cannot thrust for very long at all.

Mostly I spend a lot of our sexual time performing oral sex on him, which he enjoys. He usually brings me to orgasm with a Hitachi magic wand. We have various sex wedge things but none of them seem to help him find the right way to be inside of me. I would like for us to find positions that work so that I can have the kind of sex that *I* enjoy and haven't experienced fully in over a decade.

If you have questions I can be reached at anonywife at gmail.
posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (6 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite

Maybe you could try him on his back and you on top, facing him, with your feet on his chest and sort of leaning back with your hands on his thighs, for support. You could actually use one of the "wedge things" under his hips, so that they are raised and his, uh, gut moves back a bit and out of your way.
posted by tumid dahlia at 5:18 PM on July 25, 2011

Big Big Love: A Sourcebook on Sex for People of Size and Those Who Love Them by Hanne Blank is an amazing resource for fat folks and their partners. There's a chapter dealing specifically with sexual positions. The rest of the book is more generally about self acceptance and understanding sexuality generally as a fat person.
posted by kimdog at 5:31 PM on July 25, 2011 [6 favorites]

How about a strap-on that goes over his leg or arm? That would perhaps allow a bit more positional versatility.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:58 PM on July 25, 2011

I wonder if a bondage sling or chair would give you two some useful options.
posted by not that girl at 6:26 PM on July 25, 2011 [1 favorite]

Seconding Hanne Blank's book, it's great regarding sexual positions and much, much more.
posted by Wuggie Norple at 6:59 PM on July 25, 2011

I was also coming in here to recommend Hanne's book. It's currently out of print but a new edition is coming out this fall!
posted by jaksemas at 10:26 AM on July 26, 2011

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