Can you help me make sure it sucks less when I suck more?
July 10, 2011 6:42 PM   Subscribe

What happened to my face when I deepthroated my guy? (so very NSFW)

My partner and I have been exploring deepthroating (my petite lady throat, his large-ish gentleman's equipment), with much mutual enthusiasm to go around. I'm still pretty new to this, though, and want to make sure that something that happened recently isn't cause for greater concern.

I was on my back on the bed, with my head hanging off the side, and he was standing up. We'd been engaged in this for some time, so my eyes and nose were running like faucets (nose and sinuses completely stopped up) and there was lots of saliva, and did I mention my head was upside-down?... all of which meant that I would take a huge gasping breath each time he pulled out and then dove back in, but in general I was not breathing at all while he was in my mouth. We probably were going at it for about a minute at a time between each break for me to breathe, though I definitely lost track. We did have a safety signal in case I needed him to pull out sooner, though it didn't end up being much use: at some point, it became clear before I knew it that I'd gone on a bit too long, and as best I can describe it, I just kind of exploded with a huge sputter of air around his cock. It was a very forceful event (just breath, though, not gagging/vomit).

Fast forward a few hours, and I basically have two mild-but-obvious black eyes and every pore (capillary?) in my face, especially my forehead, was a tiny bright red dot. It all faded away within 48 hours, but... you can imagine. My first thought was that it was a rash, but I found some references in google of black eyes and/or broken blood vessels resulting from an explosive sneeze or other related "trauma," like choking, and I have the feeling this was kind of the same thing, but I'd love to hear any of your more specifically related anecdotes/insights/references, as well as any guidance on whether I'm in some kind of danger if this were to happen again.

YANMD, but YMBABJE (You May Be a Blow Job Expert), and my partner and I thank you for your help.

(throwaway email: anonredface@gmail.com)
posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (7 answers total) 14 users marked this as a favorite

 
Broken capillaries are a sign of choking. It appears you were choking, and that's what happened.
posted by xingcat at 7:01 PM on July 10, 2011 [9 favorites]


Yeah, it seems like you were not getting enough air and the way you're doing it now doesn't seem safe. (With the caveat that I don't do breath play much because I know someone who died doing it, so I am not the world's most experienced.)

In my experience safe signals can't be relied upon with breath play because the bottom either panics and forgets them, or becomes lightheaded/euphoric.

The top really does need to take on full responsibility for making sure the bottom is getting enough air and cannot rely upon the bottom to communicate accurately.

Try switching up activities more often and ask your partner to give you time to catch your breath.
posted by the young rope-rider at 7:19 PM on July 10, 2011 [7 favorites]


Response by poster: Lifters get that on extremely heavy lifts from holding/restricting their breath to maintain internal pressure while under a lot of strain. It's not quite choking but it's maintainig enough pressure to blow the small blood vessels. You probably did the same thing. Maybe take things a little slower in the future--taking a minute between each breath is not sustainable unless you have considerable lung capacity.
posted by Anonymous at 7:24 PM on July 10, 2011


It's petechial hemorrhaging (learned that one from CSI). Since it's faded, you're probably just fine. I got it once after a really severe coughing bout a few years ago. Freaked me right the hell out, but went away after a bit with no lasting damage.
posted by phunniemee at 7:33 PM on July 10, 2011


Burst capillaries are a sign of a number of things that fall shy of choking: coughing, sneezing, vomiting, da poopin', all of which involve or are aided by the diaphragm.

My guess is you were holding your breath with great force, fighting back against the mouthful of cock with increasing intensity, until your glottis could hold it no more. The burst capillaries and your "forceful event" aren't directly related, then, if you follow.

Given that everyone else is going to rhapsodise about playing it a bit safer next time, I'll just suggest this: relax. When you take lungfuls of air, instead of holding the breath let it escape slowly, the way you were taught to while underwater. Become aware of your diaphragm, and don't let that pressure build.

Insert all relevant disclaimers here.
posted by tapesonthefloor at 7:33 PM on July 10, 2011 [3 favorites]


It may take a fair bit of experimenting with positioning, but it helps a lot if the person with the throat, rather than the one with the penis, exercises control over angle, depth, and timing. This is especially important in fellatio to orgasm, when the orgasming partner may temporarily lose voluntary control.

Consider the shape of your mouth and throat, how it changes with the angle of your head to your body, and the shape of your partner's penis. A good starting point will have similar curves fitting closely together rather than working against each other.

Don't be too surprised or disappointed if your throat is tight or even slammed shut at times: you're training your body and it needs time to adjust in a healthy way to the stimulus. Take breaths when you need them, in as calm a fashion as you can manage. Use your hands if you want to, and try starting at different levels of erection, from flaccid to raging, to see what works best for you both.
posted by thatdawnperson at 12:57 PM on July 11, 2011


I have no idea what happened, but if I had to make a guess I'd say: the increase of intra-abdominal pressure due to the exertion of the Valsalva maneuver induced the capillaries in your Paranasal sinuses to hemorrhage causing minor hematomas and, yeah, petechia.

Relaxation and "acceptance" is common advice for this type of activity.
posted by P.o.B. at 11:56 PM on July 11, 2011


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