Living together, working apart
January 15, 2011 8:41 AM   Subscribe

Providence/Boston working couple- where should we live, how do we get to work, and how doable/un-awesome is it?

I'm a med student applying for residency and I just fell in love with Brown's program despite the foot of snowfall during the visit. My fiance, who will be moving with me wherever I match, is getting his masters in accounting and wants to work his way up through a big 4 firm or a large corporate place. From initial investigations (also feel free to tell us if this is accurate), it looks like most of the accounting industry in RI is swallowed up by Boston, so we'll likely end up being a two-city working couple. Before I rank them over programs where we could work in the same place I want to make sure we’d really be happy with the situation. I turn to the hive for advice! I have seen this question.

1. Where should we live? Ideas for fun towns that are a reasonable distance between the two? (Both mid-20's, no pets/kids yet, liberal, want a place with good food and a bit of character- we've both lived in boring midwest suburbia and we need a change!) Tell us all about where you live! Another wrinkle- we will be looking for housing shortly after the match during spring break, before we'd know where his job would be. So, we were thinking we'd try to stay closer to Providence in case he DOES get a job there and doesn't have to commute.

2. How should we get to work? We will both have cars. Husband-to-be says he could be fine with the idea of a train ride, reading books on his iPhone, unless you all tell him that the commute is not as bad as I've heard. It looks like MBTA is the way to go? Their zone/interzone fare scheme is a bit confusing but it looks like we’d be spending max $250/month) How do you enjoy that ride? Is Acela a viable option (looks expensive!)? Does RIPTA have something we should be checking out?

3. How sucky will this be for us? We’ll both be in fairly intense new jobs (presumably long hours for both, mine with an unpredictability factor to boot), moving to a new town where we don’t know other people yet, and newlyweds. Do you find that the commute is draining and the time/distance really eats away at your quality time together as a couple? Is living somewhere in between a sacrifice in terms of accessibility of fun cultural things to do or ability to make/get together with friends in the city?

Thanks for the reassurance and/or reality check!
posted by alygator to Travel & Transportation (18 answers total)
 
> It looks like MBTA is the way to go? How do you enjoy that ride?

Yes. MBTA commuter trains are much better than driving in many ways. They run on time and the staff is courteous. Their wagons are confirtable, with wifi and four tables to set your laptop on. It gets busy near Boston during rush hours, but not overwhelmingly so. They have trains all the way to Providence on the weekends now. You will probably end up in a city on the train line about halfway between Boston and Providence and you will both take the train, but in different direction.

If his work is mostly laptop-driven with flexible hours, with an office not too far from South Station, then living in Providence might an option. He will get work much done on the train.


> Is Acela a viable option (looks expensive!)?

No, not it is not meant for commuters.


> Does RIPTA have something we should be checking out?

RIPTA doesn't run outside of RI.
posted by gmarceau at 9:18 AM on January 15, 2011


One of the professors in my office at a school in Boston is married to a professor at Brown.

They live in Natick. They both take the commuter rail. It seems to work for them.

So, you may want to look at towns along the Providence/Stoughton line. Some former classmates of mind who commuted to Boston for school lived in Attleboro and liked it, but I don't know anything about it.
posted by zizzle at 9:22 AM on January 15, 2011


I used to take the train from Providence to Boston every day. It was actually awesome, because the southern trains have tables and now wi-fi, and if you get on in Providence you get your pick of seats. South Station is very convenient to a lot of the financial district as well; he maybe wouldn't even need to take the subway.

Attleboro has two MBTA stations on the same line as Providence and even has trains that leave in both directions at around the same time occasionally. Also, plenty of parking. I can't say that Attleboro is all that much fun but it isn't miles and miles of subdivisions. Also, two movie theatres (one with beer!) MBTA passes are tax deductible. Many employers offer them pre-tax or will pay for the whole thing. You can deduct them from your taxes otherwise. I don't know your feelings on cars but there is regional bus transport.

Providence is a great city and I often wish I still lived there except that there is only RIPTA which has really lousy schedules.
posted by mkb at 9:27 AM on January 15, 2011


I say live in Providence. It is a small very livable city. Lots of great restaurants, lots of great culture, very very very quirky. Actually the whole state is really quirky. Will be a big change from the middest, people are more gruff/direct and might come off as mean, but I always thought the people of Providence were just much nicer than those of Boston (gross generalization of course). I can't say enough good things about the city, seriously. There isn't much life in the towns along the 95 corridor.

You would probably want to look at the East Side for living, but if you want something more affordable and much less gentrified consider the other side of the highway. Some serious real estate bargains down there compared to Boston and the burbs.

As for the commute, the drive can be brutal, if you leave early though then you won't hit traffic as much. The big sticking point is always the southeast expressway into Boston. It sucks. It is always backed up. Commuter rail is pretty good, much less stress.
posted by WickedPissah at 9:30 AM on January 15, 2011


Also, Natick sounds like a terrible option for commuting to Providence. You would need to take a train into South Station on the most unreliable commuter rail line before you take a train down to Providence so that's at least 90 minutes, not counting transfer (almost wrote trainsfer, ha) time and the time you sit cursing when you miss one train because the other was late.

Here's the relevant train schedule. I know there are some people who use Amtrak to commute. It's a tiny bit faster because there are fewer stops between Providence and Boston, and I think there is a monthly pass that is not much more expensive than the zone 8 monthly. The monthly pass for Attleboro to Providence is the Interzone 2 and only $77.
posted by mkb at 9:32 AM on January 15, 2011


This is really common. If you want a change from suburbia, pick either Boston or Providence, and live there. That way, at the end of the day, and on weekends, you're already somewhere with amenities that you want! The argument to live in the middle, in no-man's-land, has never quite made sense to me. Then you're both commuting, and you don't even live anywhere you'd otherwise choose! I understand that choice a bit more when it's a really long and bothersome commute, but the train commute from PVD to BOS is fine. You will build more of a community and develop ties to a community more if you actually like where you're living, and spend some time there. Of course, that advice doesn't apply if you need/want to be living in suburban life for whatever reason - schools, space, prices, family. In your case as young professionals, I'd really encourage you not to live in most of the suburbs between Providence and Boston. There are a few cute towns, but I'll let others weigh in with the most appropriate ones.

If you're the resident, it seems more appropriate for you to be very close to the Brown program, and your partner should be the commuter. PVD is a really great small city with lots of character, some good food, great music, fun arts scene, and lots of young folks doing interesting things. Plus, housing is a bit cheaper and I personally think that it has a better quality of life for really busy people.
posted by barnone at 9:32 AM on January 15, 2011


I suppose it depends what service line your fiance is looking at but most options will entail long hrs at least some of the time and he may find himself travelling to clients all over the place (at all hrs) so don't assume that he won't need a car, because the commute to his office is feasible by train...
posted by koahiatamadl at 9:42 AM on January 15, 2011


Also, Natick sounds like a terrible option for commuting to Providence. You would need to take a train into South Station on the most unreliable commuter rail line before you take a train down to Providence so that's at least 90 minutes, not counting transfer (almost wrote trainsfer, ha) time and the time you sit cursing when you miss one train because the other was late.


Eh, if someone did sort of a hybrid commute (drive to the train station at 128, train from there) it might make more sense. No idea if there's a park and ride lot there but I wouldn't be surprised. Looks like both Amtrak and MBTA trains stop there on the route between Boston and Providence.
posted by Sublimity at 9:43 AM on January 15, 2011


Live in Providence. My husband commutes to Boston on the T, and it's way better than driving. We live in a northern RI suburb, and we're happy here, but we're in our thirties with a kid. If he does end up commuting to Boston from the Providence Amtrak station, he should try to find someone to carpool to the station with, as parking can sometimes be tricky (it's a relatively small parking garage.)
posted by Ruki at 1:15 PM on January 15, 2011 [1 favorite]


gmarceau wrote: "If his work is mostly laptop-driven with flexible hours, with an office not too far from South Station, then living in Providence might an option. He will get work much done on the train."

I nearly fell out of my chair laughing. If he's going into audit at a Big 4 firm, his work will be mainly laptop driven (as long as he can spread out reams of paper in front of him) but his hours will be inflexible and the chance of him working out of the office much in his first couple of years is about zero.

And if MBTA doesn't run 24 hours, he will absolutely have to take a car to work. He will work to or past midnight on many occasions. It might be possible to make it work if his firm has a good deal with a car rental company for the evenings when he works late unexpectedly.

Of course, if he does drive to work, he'll be heading home late enough that traffic won't be an issue, so he'll only have to fight traffic one way...
posted by wierdo at 2:05 PM on January 15, 2011 [1 favorite]


Another vote to live in Providence. The commute to Boston, as others have mentioned, is "wicked" easy. You could live easily on the East Side - it is where most Brown students do. However, some live on the Westside or even Downcity (what we call downtown). I personally live in Warwick and commute in to Providence (Grad student, at dissertation stage though). If you want to live in Mass., Attleboro is another option. It has a bigger commuter parking lot. If you do move to Providence, feel free to memail me and I'm happy to give more specific advice on neighborhoods. I lived on the eastside for 3 years.
posted by quodlibet at 2:12 PM on January 15, 2011


Yeah as someone who grew up in Foxboro... don't live in any of the in-between towns. They're quiet and very boring, I could not walk or bike to anything as a kid. Except a yak farm. I'd go with Providence because it's cute, and there are daily commuter trains to Boston, but usually the reverse-commute (if you lived in Boston and travelled to Brown) has less train options.
posted by kpht at 3:42 PM on January 15, 2011


Nthing live in Providence. And although people sort of don't, you can walk to the Amtrak station from anywhere on the Eastside or Downcity. FWIW, there are large national accounting, brokerage and insurance firms in Providence; I'd try like hell to get a job in one.
posted by DarlingBri at 3:53 PM on January 15, 2011


Yeah as someone who grew up in Foxboro... don't live in any of the in-between towns.

Came here to say this. I grew up on the South Shore (as the area between Boston and RI is called and it's all suburbia plus a few depressed old industrial towns. Live in Providence because, as a resident, you'll want to be close to your hospital. It's also so much cheaper than Boston and going through a bit of an artistic rennaissance.
posted by lunasol at 5:34 PM on January 15, 2011


Response by poster: Thanks for all the answers so far! Looks like MBTA is pretty awesome and Providence will be the winner if we do end up there. I'd love more input on question number 3- commuting couples, do you still have enough quality time with your SO? Should we choose Providence as #1 with one of us commuting if we could choose another city where both of us could work with jobs nearby?
posted by alygator at 10:18 AM on January 16, 2011


I'd love more input on question number 3- commuting couples, do you still have enough quality time with your SO? Should we choose Providence as #1 with one of us commuting if we could choose another city where both of us could work with jobs nearby?

You'll both be working long hours, you'll both be under a lot of pressure at work during those hours and you'll both be a lot more tired than you ever were as students...depending on how much time you currently spend with each other the idea of how much quality time is required may have to be adjusted before you even think about commuting.

Adding a long commute for one or both of you will increase the pain a lot. As somebody in audit in a BIG 4 firm who has had a significant commute for years my experience is that a long commute, on top of the long hours, kills you. I had gotten so used to being so tired and not having a life that I never realised just what difference it makes until I started a long term assignment in another country where I can walk to the office and where the commute to the client I work on for six months of the year takes 30 mins door to door.

And it makes all the difference. I still leave the client very late at night and work weekends and am tired. But I do spend two to three hrs less less commuting every day than I did this time last year, which means I get to do stuff other than sleep and work, even if only for an hr and I get to sleep more. In the past I ended up reducing my sleep hours to free up time to do things other than work and drive....

Given the demands both of your jobs will place on you I would recommend you try to keep the commute as short as possible, for both of you. Because you will not be able to enjoy the location, as lovely as it may be, if you are never there or if you are so exhausted that you end up spending a significant amount of time you are there asleep.
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:31 AM on January 16, 2011


Response by poster: Sorry to babysit the post, but for those of you accountants chiming in, he'd rather work tax than audit (obviously we'll take whatever job is available).
posted by alygator at 12:24 PM on January 16, 2011


you accountants chiming in, he'd rather work tax than audit (obviously we'll take whatever job is available). Guess what I was trying to say is that long hours plus long commute sucks...irrespective of service line :)
posted by koahiatamadl at 2:46 PM on January 16, 2011


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