Dirty Ballads & Other Prurient Folk Tunes
January 10, 2011 5:21 PM   Subscribe

I need some raunchy ballads and bar songs to play at a Western-themed party.

I've been invited to play at a small get-together on Friday on the condition that I dress like a cowboy and sing dirty folk songs. I don't know any, so I'm turning to you, hive-mind. What are the most prurient songs you can think of, preferably American in origin and from the mid-1800s to the early 1900s?
posted by The White Hat to Media & Arts (18 answers total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
not the right time frame, but this song might work http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/d/david_allan_coe/the_rodeo_song.html
posted by jennstra at 5:34 PM on January 10, 2011

Also not the period you list but one of my favorite Western Swing songs from the 1930's via the Light Crust Doughboys: Pussy Pussy Pussy. Very cowboy. Very American.
posted by dog food sugar at 5:40 PM on January 10, 2011 [1 favorite]

Best answer: The Whores of San Pedro
Are older than God
And their beards tumble down to their tits.
With one single bump of her ponderous rump
She can grind your poor pecker to bits.

So, here's to the whore of San Pedro
To that marvelous fucking machine
If I had my way
You could see her today
On the cover of Time magazine.

Dave van Ronk does a great acapella rendition of this, there may in fact be no other way to sing it.
posted by jessamyn at 5:44 PM on January 10, 2011

Yeah, I came into say The Rodeo Song
posted by newpotato at 5:52 PM on January 10, 2011

The North Atlantic Squadron a racy seafaring song, not a cowboy one, but along the same lines. Similarly The Good Ship Venus.
posted by jessamyn at 6:00 PM on January 10, 2011

I share jessamyn's love of DvR, but come on, that's not a period folk song. (If you want *contemporary* dirty folk, google Dan Reeder.)

So, try this: http://www.amazon.com/Sissy-Man-Blues-Authentic-Straight/dp/B000006KHQ (Doesn't seem to be downloadable; if you need it sooner than delivery allows, PM me and I can... arrange for it to be downloadable.)

Also, Saget: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0VZXV7aTl24
posted by staggernation at 6:06 PM on January 10, 2011

Best answer: The Hash House Harriers have an almost bottomless set of dirty songs, many of which are set to the tune of traditional folk songs, or could otherwise be sung cowboy-style. This online hymnal, for instance, has something like 800 songs.
posted by Homeboy Trouble at 6:20 PM on January 10, 2011

"Why don't we get drunk (and screw)" from Jimmy Buffett

I really do appreciate the fact you're sittin here
Your voice sounds so wonderful
But yer face don't look too clear
So bar maid bring a pitcher, another round o brew
Honey, why don't we get drunk and screw
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 6:25 PM on January 10, 2011 [1 favorite]

(Jessamyn? what happened to your star?)
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 6:27 PM on January 10, 2011

Lucille Bogan has some corkers: Shave 'em dry, for example.
posted by Paragon at 6:28 PM on January 10, 2011

Best answer: Oscar Brand: Bawdy Songs #6 Bawdy Western Songs has a few that I found enjoyable. Sadly it appears most of the mp3s are down on that site.

I was only able to find The Great Big Wheel and Blinded By Turds after a cursory search on youtube.
posted by ktrey at 6:39 PM on January 10, 2011

Best answer: probably lots here
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 7:09 PM on January 10, 2011

Cliff Carlisle seems to have sung a dirty ballad or two in his time. I'd recommend That Nasty Swing or, if you can find it, the song "Ash Can Blues." Pretty racy for the 1930's!
posted by _superconductor at 8:12 PM on January 10, 2011

I spent my last $10 (On Birth Control and Beer) is really too sweet to be dirty, and sure as hell not from the right period, but it sure enough does entertain.

Also, why hasn't anybody mentioned Kinky Friedman yet? Homo Erectus
posted by ivan ivanych samovar at 9:22 PM on January 10, 2011

Check out "Nothing Sacred" by David Alan Coe; he wrote "Take This Job And Shove It" and "Would You Lay With Me (in a Field of Stone)", however, this record is much raunchier.
posted by dubold at 2:14 AM on January 11, 2011

Charlotte the Harlot (the rugby song, not the Iron Maiden song)
posted by electroboy at 7:28 AM on January 11, 2011

Patrica the Stripper (lyrics)
posted by ceri richard at 7:30 AM on January 11, 2011

From the 1840s:

Buffalo Gals, won't you come out tonight,
Come out tonight, come out tonight.
Buffalo Gals, won't you come out tonight
And dance by the light of the moon.

I danced with a gal with a hole in her stockin',
And her heel kept a-knockin', and her toes kept a-rockin'
I danced with a gal with a hole in her stockin'
And we danced by the light of the moon.

Bawdy, but maybe not raunchy enough? Still a favorite of mine.
posted by Knowyournuts at 10:23 AM on January 11, 2011

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