Manual labor
December 27, 2010 7:52 AM Subscribe
Help me reach out and touch (my special) someone! Hand job advice sought...
So, I recently found out that the new bf particularly enjoys hand jobs. OK, cool! I'm a little apprehensive, though, because a) I always have been about that specific act, since I don't have one of those thingys and feel a little clumsy handling it and b) he's circumcised, and my two previous boyfriends were not. We communicate about what feels good and what doesn't, and we've been having a lot of fun with practicing (including me watching how he does it.) It's always nice to bring some new approaches to the table though. What do I need to know to give the Best Handjob Of All Time? Are there things I absolutely shouldn't do (or absolutely must try)? What're your favorite tricks, surprises, and twists? Your wisdom is much appreciated (and can be shared anonymously at mefi.hj.advice@gmail.com).
So, I recently found out that the new bf particularly enjoys hand jobs. OK, cool! I'm a little apprehensive, though, because a) I always have been about that specific act, since I don't have one of those thingys and feel a little clumsy handling it and b) he's circumcised, and my two previous boyfriends were not. We communicate about what feels good and what doesn't, and we've been having a lot of fun with practicing (including me watching how he does it.) It's always nice to bring some new approaches to the table though. What do I need to know to give the Best Handjob Of All Time? Are there things I absolutely shouldn't do (or absolutely must try)? What're your favorite tricks, surprises, and twists? Your wisdom is much appreciated (and can be shared anonymously at mefi.hj.advice@gmail.com).
Let him know you're enjoying what you're doing. Enthusiasm and spontaneity are what make hand jobs fun. Give him one when he's not expecting it, like right before you go out to dinner.
posted by HotPatatta at 8:15 AM on December 27, 2010
posted by HotPatatta at 8:15 AM on December 27, 2010
It can also be fun to involve both of you in the handjob, i.e., encourage him to masturbate while you pay attention to other areas. That kind of incidental bumping of hands in the process can make things hotter.
Also, you could touch/guide his hands while he's masturbating, or have him touch/guide your hands while you're giving him the handjob. This is especially useful as you're learning what he likes best.
posted by Tknophobia at 8:23 AM on December 27, 2010
Also, you could touch/guide his hands while he's masturbating, or have him touch/guide your hands while you're giving him the handjob. This is especially useful as you're learning what he likes best.
posted by Tknophobia at 8:23 AM on December 27, 2010
Yes to using lube, but pay attention to the viscosity of whatever it is you use.
I find a lot of the typical sex lubes to be too "slick" for masturbation/handjobs. I prefer something a little thicker/less slippery as a bit of friction is a good thing in this case. Lately I've been using plain old vaseline. Cleanup isn't as convenient, and of course the usual caveats of not using vaseline with condoms apply, but if you're jerking him to completion then you don't usually have to worry about immediate intercourse anyway.
Find out what he uses when he is masturbating and try that.
He will likely generate a lot of precum in this process - use it to your advantage (smear it around the head of his penis, wipe it along the shaft). The nice thing about precum is that it is very slick and then dries up, so you alternate between super slippery and a bit drier (more friction)
Talk to him as well - as with bj's, enthusiasm is a big part of this process. You need to make him feel like it's all about him, and your sole goal is to give him an amazing orgasm. HJ's are very freeing for the recipient because he will not be worried about pleasuring you or making sure you are comfortable. He just has to lay back and enjoy.
When he starts to cum, go to town with your tugging - the sensations are intense and over the top. He'll stop you when it's too much.
Don't forget, he has much more experience in giving handjobs (to himself) than you ever will, so don't be shy about involving him in the process.
posted by anonymous account at 8:35 AM on December 27, 2010 [1 favorite]
I find a lot of the typical sex lubes to be too "slick" for masturbation/handjobs. I prefer something a little thicker/less slippery as a bit of friction is a good thing in this case. Lately I've been using plain old vaseline. Cleanup isn't as convenient, and of course the usual caveats of not using vaseline with condoms apply, but if you're jerking him to completion then you don't usually have to worry about immediate intercourse anyway.
Find out what he uses when he is masturbating and try that.
He will likely generate a lot of precum in this process - use it to your advantage (smear it around the head of his penis, wipe it along the shaft). The nice thing about precum is that it is very slick and then dries up, so you alternate between super slippery and a bit drier (more friction)
Talk to him as well - as with bj's, enthusiasm is a big part of this process. You need to make him feel like it's all about him, and your sole goal is to give him an amazing orgasm. HJ's are very freeing for the recipient because he will not be worried about pleasuring you or making sure you are comfortable. He just has to lay back and enjoy.
When he starts to cum, go to town with your tugging - the sensations are intense and over the top. He'll stop you when it's too much.
Don't forget, he has much more experience in giving handjobs (to himself) than you ever will, so don't be shy about involving him in the process.
posted by anonymous account at 8:35 AM on December 27, 2010 [1 favorite]
Try Starting a Fire (NSFW; apologies for the somewhat seedy video link). I used this a couple times on my ex-boyfriend and he came so hard he nearly passed out.
Also: variation. Don't just stick with one technique the whole time; mix it up. Get him close to the edge and then stop, move up for a kiss, and resume. And you know this already, but keep communicating. And have fun!
posted by fight or flight at 8:39 AM on December 27, 2010 [4 favorites]
Also: variation. Don't just stick with one technique the whole time; mix it up. Get him close to the edge and then stop, move up for a kiss, and resume. And you know this already, but keep communicating. And have fun!
posted by fight or flight at 8:39 AM on December 27, 2010 [4 favorites]
Wow, googling handjob advice gets this. Plenty of advice here (NSFW).
There are special lubes for jacking it. I haven't tried them, but they are specific for the practice so they must be good (?!).
Are blow jobs completely off the table? If he loves handjobs, add a little mouth to it, but focus on the hands, helps to lubricate things and adds another dimension.
posted by TheBones at 9:29 AM on December 27, 2010 [1 favorite]
There are special lubes for jacking it. I haven't tried them, but they are specific for the practice so they must be good (?!).
Are blow jobs completely off the table? If he loves handjobs, add a little mouth to it, but focus on the hands, helps to lubricate things and adds another dimension.
posted by TheBones at 9:29 AM on December 27, 2010 [1 favorite]
Like Tknophobia says, try putting your hands on him as he masturbates, that way you get a sense of the rhythm and pressure. Also, lube is always a plus.
posted by captainscared at 12:03 PM on December 27, 2010
posted by captainscared at 12:03 PM on December 27, 2010
Use enough lube and reapply as necessary. He probably already has a brand he prefers so use that.
Position yourself facing him so that you can firmly run your thumb up and down the ridge on the underside of his penis. It's very awkward for guys to be able to twist their hands around enough to do that when handling themselves, so a nice firm thumb rub on that ridge will be a special treat for him.
posted by Jacqueline at 6:42 PM on December 27, 2010
Position yourself facing him so that you can firmly run your thumb up and down the ridge on the underside of his penis. It's very awkward for guys to be able to twist their hands around enough to do that when handling themselves, so a nice firm thumb rub on that ridge will be a special treat for him.
posted by Jacqueline at 6:42 PM on December 27, 2010
I saw a book in Borders the other day called "The Handjob Handbook." That might help?
posted by jenfullmoon at 11:07 AM on December 28, 2010
posted by jenfullmoon at 11:07 AM on December 28, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by HotPatatta at 8:08 AM on December 27, 2010