So you are about to make some silly mistake. How do you stop yourself?

October 25, 2010 6:35 PM

So you are about to make some silly mistake. How do you stop yourself?

Imagine this scenario:

You evaluate a situation and quickly come to the wrong conclusion (I am talking about in the space of a few seconds.) Then you act on that wrong conclusion. A while afterwards, you notice that your original conclusion was wrong, but you've already acted on it and therefore created more complications.

The question is: What's the best way to notice that you've come to a wrong conclusion really quickly, so that you don't act on it?

(I apologize if this sounds too abstract. It can apply to solving math problems, figuring out directions, and following a recipe among other things.)

posted by gregb1007 to Grab Bag (23 answers total)

Double-check, attention to details, have a pattern when you solve problems/are faced with difficult choices. Try to envision the most likely consequences AND the worst-case scenario in your head before you go with your decision/conclusion. Playing chess at a young age helped me a lot.

Sometimes it's not about making the best decision - it's to avoid making the worst. Hey, that's how democracy works and that's worked out okay so far, right?

Good luck =)

(and believe in yourself!)
posted by jstarlee at 6:40 PM on October 25, 2010

This question is too abstract.

It's pretty hard to answer this without saying "Think a bit longer before making the wrong decision so you make the right one instead" or "Know more and don't make the wrong decision", or "Don't make decisions until you know it is the right one".

Basically, it's unanswerable, as the 'best way to notice' entirely depends on the specifics of the decision.
posted by Brockles at 6:40 PM on October 25, 2010 [6 favorites]

Try to think of what the Intelligent Skeptic -- someone who disagrees with or at least has serious doubts about the action you're considering -- would say. Would this person have a good argument that's stronger than your reason for acting? If so, don't act.

(I don't know if that's helpful at all, but ... ask an abstract question, get an abstract answer!)
posted by John Cohen at 6:46 PM on October 25, 2010

In the infamous words of Norm Abram, "Measure twice. Cut once."

With a little creativity you can apply this to just about everything.
posted by COD at 6:49 PM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]

the mormons, long before WWJD, had the CTR ring - choose the right. more than a decade after i left the church, sometimes i still think of that ring and that my 8 year old self knew what "choose the right" meant, so me as a 29 year old probably has the ability to figure it out.

sometimes i think about getting the 25 cent ring and wearing it on my pinky, just because i think it's beautifully simple advise. choose the right, no more, no less.
posted by nadawi at 6:51 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best answer: I sort of agree with Brockles, in that there's really no way to solve this problem because to err is, sadly (yet unavoidably) human. You seem to be asking how to avoid ever making a mistake in judgment, which is frankly impossible.

However, I too am prone to be quick and decisive, and while those personality traits are rare and very useful in a number of situations, I also know the regrets of not having been more cautious. When doing an activity, try to categorize all the steps into "could be catastrophic" or "could not be catastrophic." Messing up almost any step in a math problem can be catastrophic so you can't really apply it there, but let's use a recipe as an example.

Chocolate Chip Cookies Viewed in Light of Potential Catastrophes
amount of sugar - CNBC
amount of baking soda - CBC
amount of flour - CBC
amount of chocolate chips - CNBC
number of eggs - CBC
amount of butter - CNBC

Obviously this is on a scale (if you put in a pound of butter it's clearly going to go horribly awry), but if before embarking upon an activity that requires technical precision you try to filter out ahead of time what things it is absolutely, 100%, non-negotiably important not to screw up you'll probably add in an extra second or two of thought in for yourself when they come up.

Good luck! But remember, mistakes will be made.
posted by libertypie at 6:56 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Learn from your mistakes.

Each time you screw up, do a quick autopsy - how and why did you come to the wrong conclusion? Given what you knew at the time, what was a plausible course of thought that would have led to a better conclusion? What is involved in doing that in future?

In those few seconds when you've come to a conclusion, before you've found out if it's right, ask yourself how reliably correct you think you are. How much would you stake on this? (Is it little more than a guess that might pay off? Would you bet your own life on being right?)

You'd be surprised at how quickly you can learn where your cognitive weaknesses and biases are if you're honest with yourself, and you'll start to recognize when you're on shaky ground before you commit to action, which you can use to either double check your plan, or consciously decide that you wish to take the risk.
posted by -harlequin- at 7:01 PM on October 25, 2010

Check: Do I have low blood sugar or a headache right now? Am I sleep deprived? If so, can this decision be deferred until after I've eaten and slept? It sounds trivial, but I've noticed that I'm much more likely to make bad decisions if I'm feeling tired, shaky or in pain. Basically, ensure your brain is operating at full power before trusting it to bring you to the right conclusions.
posted by embrangled at 7:08 PM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]

There was recently an educator on the radio talking about helping kids make fewer mistakes in handwriting or math. I have no idea of the context or the interviewer but this advice was great.

She specifically gave the example of some kids drawing a 6 backwards. Because kids have a hard time slowing down and just thinking about how 6 should actually look, this program tells the kid, whenever you need to make a 6, use a red pencil. And eventuay they form the habit of creating perfect 6s and stop needing the red pencil.

This works because stopping to pick up the red pencil gives the kid brain a moment to stop and think about the 6. And there are all known examples of this technique for the adult brain.

Telling someone to 'stop and think about that' rarely seems to be effective, but the red pencils and the CTR ring are a thing to think about in conjunction with the problem at hand. You've probably heard the advice about counting to ten when you're mad, and counting to a hundred when really mad. Or not mailimg angry letters. Or sleeping on a business deal. Or not boning on a first date. These are ways to give your whole brain a bit to wrap around the potential outcomes of a decision.
posted by bilabial at 7:17 PM on October 25, 2010 [3 favorites]

This is often covered in risk management as situational awareness. You're constantly paying attention to see if you're on course, and if you're not, making adjustments.
posted by ldthomps at 7:19 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

Oh. There's also a set of questions that's something along the lines of: am I tired/hungry/lonely/(and something else I'm forgetting right now) that's really helpful to a lot of people when reacting to information.

So, you get an email from someone and think, 'what a dick move to send an email like that!' and before you continue, you think, 'wait, i'm hungry. Let's go get a snack and re-evaluate this later.'
posted by bilabial at 7:22 PM on October 25, 2010

I tell my wife the reason she's so uptight about doing home repairs is that women are taught that they should never make mistakes while men are taught to cover up them up. So try not to feel anxious about making mistakes. Lots of times, the mistake is just an exploration of the problem. You correct it as you move forward and add it to your growing stockpile of hard won knowledge.


Learn to recognize the feeling of being pushed into a snap judgement. Practice using phases like, "I'll get back to you on that." and "I'll ned to think about it". Ignore honking horns behind you. Listen to that little voice.
posted by bonobothegreat at 7:27 PM on October 25, 2010 [2 favorites]

...and try to proof read more than I do.
posted by bonobothegreat at 7:28 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

I have a quick conversation with the 75 year old version of myself and try to make a decision that she won't regret. In the grand scheme of things, not much matters much.
posted by Siena at 7:44 PM on October 25, 2010 [3 favorites]

I tell my wife the reason she's so uptight about doing home repairs is that women are taught that they should never make mistakes while men are taught to cover up them up.

This is hilarious and really resonates after my recent remodel.
posted by fshgrl at 8:22 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

When doing any sort of physical work (ie hammering with a log, reaching a light socket that I really have to stretch for, climbing a tree to get a frisbee out of it), I always ask myself, "Is this something that I will be embarrassed to explain to someone at the emergency room?"
posted by Gilbert at 8:32 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

You're asking how to close the barn door after the cows have gotten out.

Train yourself from being so impulsive.

There was a recent study (sorry, can't find a citation. :/) where they took two groups of engineers, one in their 20's and one in their 60's. They gave them both the same training in a new field and then gave them problems. The young group attempted the problems sooner, but made more mistakes, took longer to find a working solution, and generally came up with worse solutions than the older group who would sit and ponder a problem. They took much longer to start action, but would invariable come up with a better solution in a shorter time with fewer mistakes.

Unless you're a EMT, trauma surgeon, firefighter, cop or astronaut you don't need to make snap decisions. Relax. Quit making your decisions before you're properly examined the problem.
posted by Ookseer at 9:19 PM on October 25, 2010 [1 favorite]

The group in their 60s had about 40 years more experience with trial and error to reflect on, though.
posted by aniola at 11:12 PM on October 25, 2010

(A key part of the study is that the problems were in a field that neither group had previous knowledge in, supposedly eliminating the effect of experience. But since I still can't find the citation, so lets pretend I didn't mention the study)

That said there is still rarely any reason to ever make snap decisions, and that is by far the best way to avoid trouble.

More specifics from the author would be immensely helpful.
posted by Ookseer at 11:52 PM on October 25, 2010

Don't talk so much. I like the saying: It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

I used to think I had to prove myself by talking, I've found as I've grown up (40s) that I prove myself through action, not speech. It's become a habit in the last couple of years not to talk when I could, but was not certain. Been amazingly useful at avoiding stupidity.
posted by b33j at 1:17 AM on October 26, 2010

there is still rarely any reason to ever make snap decisions

People don't make 'them for reasons. They make them because of some kind of emotional involvement. How often do people not preview their posts because they want to get their licks in?

This even applies to math problems (as the OP said was part of the problem domain.) That is, they rather not go back and check their work if they can leave the exam early and not have to sit there with the requisite unpleasant feelings. There's no practical benefit for doing so.

So the answer is: become aware of your emotional investments in your choices and don't let them rule you. This is also true after the fact. If you've made a bad decision, there's an emotional cost in admitting you were wrong. You need to be willing to admit it anyway.
posted by Obscure Reference at 6:43 AM on October 26, 2010 [1 favorite]

I work at a job where I have to make split second decisions all the time. The issue you have is mostly related to experience. When I was new to my job, I made bad decisions all the time because I didn't have the time to think. I could only react. As you get more experience, time will "slow down" and you will feel like you have the time to think before you act, even though you are reacting in the same amount of time as always.

So basically, my instincts sucked, and now that I'm fast enough I don't have to rely on instinct.

Give it time.
posted by soy_renfield at 7:21 AM on October 26, 2010

A lot of my impulsive poor decision making comes from trying to do too many things at once. Cutting down on multitasking helps, especially if I'm already stressed out or in a hurry. The more processes I'm trying to manage simultaneously, the greater the possibility for error - and the longer it will take me to figure out that I've made one.

But since you've mentioned recipes in your original post, I think one thing that helps immensely with successful multitasking, avoiding errors and catching them early if you do make them is the idea of having your mise en place. Fancy French cooking term that basically means prepping everything you'll need before you start actually cooking.

There's actually a very similar thing going on in the medical field right now with surgery checklists. Not so surprisingly, making surgeons go through a standardized checklist before each operation reduces complications, hospital acquired infections, and saves lives. It's one of those things that should be incredibly obvious, but experience doesn't negate the need to review the basics - "Do we have the correct patient?" "We're operating on the left knee, yes?" "Have we dosed the anesthesia correctly?" Etc. Obviously finding out that you have the paperwork wrong before you start cutting into someone is a significant improvement over realizing during/after.
posted by deludingmyself at 8:04 AM on October 26, 2010 [1 favorite]