Baptism gift for a nine year old boy (from an atheist)?
July 29, 2010 8:48 PM Subscribe
Baptism gift for a nine-year-old boy (from an atheist)?
My nine-year-old nephew is getting baptized in an evangelical church, along with his baby brother. I'm leaning towards a monetary gift for each, but I'm also trying to find a small (~$20), vaguely fun gift for him to open that is appropriate for the occasion, but consistent with my (non-) beliefs.
To be clear, I'm not trying to use the gift to make a statement, I just don't feel comfortable giving something overtly churchy.
My nine-year-old nephew is getting baptized in an evangelical church, along with his baby brother. I'm leaning towards a monetary gift for each, but I'm also trying to find a small (~$20), vaguely fun gift for him to open that is appropriate for the occasion, but consistent with my (non-) beliefs.
To be clear, I'm not trying to use the gift to make a statement, I just don't feel comfortable giving something overtly churchy.
The Lord of the Rings (or similar fantasy literature).
posted by pompomtom at 9:00 PM on July 29, 2010
posted by pompomtom at 9:00 PM on July 29, 2010
Gift certificate to a sporting goods store. Or a toy store.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 9:14 PM on July 29, 2010
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 9:14 PM on July 29, 2010
I really like the idea of a journal! Other ideas along those lines, depending on the boy's talents and interests: A sketch pad with some nice pencils/erasers, a nice photo album (I got one of these for a friend's son when he turned 9, and he LOVED it), some kind of cool puzzle that's age appropriate.
It will help if you think of the ceremony as not so much "OMG RELIGION," but kind of a rite of passage for him. I realize it's a bit weird that he's going through this along with a baby (although I don't know if the baby brother is technically a "baby"), which is all the more reason why it would be cool to find something that recognizes him not as a "baby," but as a man-in-the-making. We don't know the child as an individual, but you presumably do and can find him something in line with his interests, maybe even a little advanced for his age, that will show him that he's just taken another step toward being a grown-up. It's a perfectly valid statement to make, taking both your beliefs and his parents' into consideration. I hope the day goes well for all of you!
posted by deep thought sunstar at 9:16 PM on July 29, 2010
It will help if you think of the ceremony as not so much "OMG RELIGION," but kind of a rite of passage for him. I realize it's a bit weird that he's going through this along with a baby (although I don't know if the baby brother is technically a "baby"), which is all the more reason why it would be cool to find something that recognizes him not as a "baby," but as a man-in-the-making. We don't know the child as an individual, but you presumably do and can find him something in line with his interests, maybe even a little advanced for his age, that will show him that he's just taken another step toward being a grown-up. It's a perfectly valid statement to make, taking both your beliefs and his parents' into consideration. I hope the day goes well for all of you!
posted by deep thought sunstar at 9:16 PM on July 29, 2010
Journal is an excellent idea - or perhaps pass along a book that was dear to you as a child? Baptism has nothing to do with god(s); it's about welcoming the little turdlet into the community. That's easy enough to do!
posted by waxbanks at 9:22 PM on July 29, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by waxbanks at 9:22 PM on July 29, 2010 [1 favorite]
Gonna go against the journal idea. What 9 year old would find that fun?
Get him a DVD copy of Jim Henson's: The Storyteller. The Greek Myths that make up half the show would be a nice subtle message.
posted by inturnaround at 9:39 PM on July 29, 2010 [1 favorite]
Get him a DVD copy of Jim Henson's: The Storyteller. The Greek Myths that make up half the show would be a nice subtle message.
posted by inturnaround at 9:39 PM on July 29, 2010 [1 favorite]
A chemistry set, a Lego mindstorms robotics kit, a nice set of really powerful magnets, a model rocketry kit or anything else that might inspire a life-long interest in science would all be perfectly awesome for any kid that age, plus unassailably grounded in logic, science and reason.
posted by anildash at 10:43 PM on July 29, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by anildash at 10:43 PM on July 29, 2010 [2 favorites]
I think the journal is actually an awesome idea - it provides common ground between your atheism and his belief without compromising either one and without sending any messages other than "capture your thoughts about deep stuff" (and even that's optional).
posted by blue_wardrobe at 2:04 AM on July 30, 2010
posted by blue_wardrobe at 2:04 AM on July 30, 2010
A good book like coraline by neil gaiman.
Or social games or board game for children. (the lego board game)
Look at geek dad for other idea :
http://www.wired.com/geekdad/
i love the rory story dice : http://www.wired.com/geekdad/2010/06/rorys-story-cubes/
Regards
Bussiere
posted by bussiere at 2:05 AM on July 30, 2010
Or social games or board game for children. (the lego board game)
Look at geek dad for other idea :
http://www.wired.com/geekdad/
i love the rory story dice : http://www.wired.com/geekdad/2010/06/rorys-story-cubes/
Regards
Bussiere
posted by bussiere at 2:05 AM on July 30, 2010
Yeah, "your beliefs are kind of lame" gifts are not generally appropriate. I'm Mormon and I've managed to avoid giving my Unitarian Universalist family members that kind of treatment for 20 years; I'm sure you can restrain yourself just as well.
Unless you are sure the specific church and his parents are OK with it, avoid Tolkien - we were protested at the midnight release of Harry Potter
/Order of the Phoenix by evangelical types; you can't be too careful on this subject lately.
Consider something that appeals to his likely interests in technology, grossness, and adventure. "Make Your Own Slime: World Edition," or whatever. Books about boys his age (Tom Sawyer, etc.) are nice, too.
I am also a strong advocate for snap circuits kits.
posted by SMPA at 6:34 AM on July 30, 2010
Unless you are sure the specific church and his parents are OK with it, avoid Tolkien - we were protested at the midnight release of Harry Potter
/Order of the Phoenix by evangelical types; you can't be too careful on this subject lately.
Consider something that appeals to his likely interests in technology, grossness, and adventure. "Make Your Own Slime: World Edition," or whatever. Books about boys his age (Tom Sawyer, etc.) are nice, too.
I am also a strong advocate for snap circuits kits.
posted by SMPA at 6:34 AM on July 30, 2010
Best answer: Meant to add: a nice multitool is pretty traditional for boys in this age range. It can bring up complications WRT school, his jurisdiction, etc., but he will almost certainly love it.
posted by SMPA at 6:39 AM on July 30, 2010
posted by SMPA at 6:39 AM on July 30, 2010
Best answer: Along the lines of a journal -- an mp3 recorder / digital voice recorder. When I was a kid, my brother and I had fun with a tape recorder, making radio shows... it could also be used for recording his musings... sometimes it's easier to speak than to write.
posted by indigo4963 at 8:12 AM on July 30, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by indigo4963 at 8:12 AM on July 30, 2010 [1 favorite]
@waxbanks. Baptism for a lot of people is very closely tied to God. It is a ver personal rite if passage, but the idea is rooted in the idea of personal purification. In Christianity it is a symbol of a commitment to following Christ. I wouldn't say it has no connection to God, as that ignores everything about the tradition and current purpose.
@op. I like the suggestions of science kits and building things, so I'll add to that. A microscope, model kit (found out if he likes cars, planes, or motorcycles), telescope, or maybe a remote controlled car.
You could have a note tied to the telescope or microscope about "your becoming a man, use this to take a closer look... Or a deeper look... Etc".
Or maybe some type of trip? Not sure how close you are, but a rafting, camping, hiking, rock climbing, ice skating, etc. trip would create a memory beyond just a gift.
posted by peripatew at 8:52 AM on July 30, 2010
@op. I like the suggestions of science kits and building things, so I'll add to that. A microscope, model kit (found out if he likes cars, planes, or motorcycles), telescope, or maybe a remote controlled car.
You could have a note tied to the telescope or microscope about "your becoming a man, use this to take a closer look... Or a deeper look... Etc".
Or maybe some type of trip? Not sure how close you are, but a rafting, camping, hiking, rock climbing, ice skating, etc. trip would create a memory beyond just a gift.
posted by peripatew at 8:52 AM on July 30, 2010
Yeah FFS "subtle hints" and YAYAYYAYA science!???? Jesus Christ on a bike, that's rilly rilly annoying and rilly rilly patronising.
How about a knife?
posted by low_horrible_immoral at 10:31 AM on July 30, 2010
How about a knife?
posted by low_horrible_immoral at 10:31 AM on July 30, 2010
Response by poster: Thanks for all of the great ideas! I found a great journal that has a weird fact on each page.
Now I've got a ton of ideas for his upcoming birthday as well!
@deep thought sunstar Thanks for the 'another step toward being a grown-up' perspective. I'd been struggling with how to frame the event. As waxbanks said an infant baptism is really 'welcome to the community', but that didn't quite fit this situation.
@hal_c_on Huck Finn is an excellent idea. Perfect for his age and just subversive enough. I'm definitely going to use that for a future gift.
@SMPA I agree on avoiding Tolkien for this occasion. I did consider the Narnia books which I enjoyed at about that age. Depending on your interpretation it may or may not have too much baggage.
posted by nuffsaid at 10:38 AM on July 30, 2010
Now I've got a ton of ideas for his upcoming birthday as well!
@deep thought sunstar Thanks for the 'another step toward being a grown-up' perspective. I'd been struggling with how to frame the event. As waxbanks said an infant baptism is really 'welcome to the community', but that didn't quite fit this situation.
@hal_c_on Huck Finn is an excellent idea. Perfect for his age and just subversive enough. I'm definitely going to use that for a future gift.
@SMPA I agree on avoiding Tolkien for this occasion. I did consider the Narnia books which I enjoyed at about that age. Depending on your interpretation it may or may not have too much baggage.
posted by nuffsaid at 10:38 AM on July 30, 2010
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posted by jedicus at 8:51 PM on July 29, 2010 [7 favorites]