Fathering without fear.
June 14, 2010 12:11 PM   Subscribe

What are some good resources (websites, podcasts, books) for new parents that avoid fear-mongering?

I'm going to be a new dad is less than a month. I'm looking for resources that take a positive approach to raising children - not endless lists of things that can go wrong or ways that you can screw up your kid.

Obviously, at this point I'm more interested in items about practical infant care and early child development, but I'm also looking for stuff about fun projects, books, etc. for toddlers and older kids.

I'm in the SF Bay Area, if it matters.
posted by murphy slaw to Human Relations (9 answers total) 26 users marked this as a favorite
Of all the books we purchased, the one I would recommend for being the least fear-mongering and most useful was The Happiest Baby on The Block. I am also currently in love with this book for older children (Toad Cottages and Shooting Stars, for those who don't want to click on the link).

Avoid the "What to Expect.. " series. They are full of every possible thing that can go wrong.
posted by valoius at 12:19 PM on June 14, 2010

Wondertime toddler-parenting magazine is apparently no longer in publication, but it might be worth browsing back issues if you're ever in your local library. As I remember, it focused pretty consistently on child development and fun activity ideas, rather than marketing/fearmongering.
posted by Bardolph at 12:28 PM on June 14, 2010

I've found the A-Z list on Ask Dr. Sears useful for practical things like dosages for various medicines (good when you've lost the cardboard packaging).
posted by The corpse in the library at 12:29 PM on June 14, 2010

Be very judicious in finding forums to follow. If they give you a disingenuous or uncomfortable feeling, get out. I'm specifically thinking of things like the LiveJournal parenting and breastfeeding communities, where there's a mix of clueless people Asking Dr. Internet, strident folks who can't BELIEVE you're doing THAT, and people doing both who are convinced that learning Japanese is more important than getting potty-trained before the age of 6. And then there are the snarking communities. Ugh! You have enough to deal with in your own lives; why spend time creating and engaging in drama that isn't even your business?

That said, there are wonderful boards elsewhere out in the ether, so if you find one you like, great. I've known several people who have continued relationships with the people they've met on these boards for years after their kids were born.
posted by Madamina at 12:51 PM on June 14, 2010

I'm enjoying reading through the pages of Evidence Based Parenting. I'm finding it very reassuring and helpful as someone in nearly the same boat as you (going to be a mom in 1.5 months!)
Good luck!
posted by nprigoda at 12:57 PM on June 14, 2010

Father of two teenage daughters here.
I always recommend T. Berry Brazelton's books to new parents. He was a big influence on me as a new Dad. His style is one I've tried to incorporate into my parenting and it's served me well.
posted by Mr.Me at 1:09 PM on June 14, 2010

I really like Science Based Parenting, Rational Moms, and the Podcast Beyond Belief (that last one is aimed at secular parents, but they mostly cover parenting science and have some really good interviews). These are all really good sources of information, with the minimal amount of, "OMG! You'll destroy your child forever if you do Thing X!!!!"

I recommend avoiding Parents magazine. I got a couple free issues of that when I was pregnant, and found it to be very sensationalized and full of every possible thing that could harm your baby and keep you up at night. Actually, I think most magazines are probably like that, though Parenting has some pretty good articles.
posted by lexicakes at 9:32 PM on June 14, 2010

The archives at Ask Moxie are pretty great. She's been dealing with real life (including a divorce) so recent postings are a bit thin, but there is a ton of great advice there provided by parents for parents.
posted by anastasiav at 7:02 AM on June 15, 2010

I found this book on Boing Boing shortly after I became a parent. It's has practical advice regarding the health and welfare of your new kid. I think it's saved us from a couple of pointless trips to the doctor's office.
posted by hot_monster at 4:18 PM on June 15, 2010

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