Teaching young high-schoolers tolerance
June 6, 2010 2:27 PM Subscribe
I'm trying to organize an anti-bullying presentation for high school freshmen and sophomores - any tips?
I'm the president of my high school's GSA, and we've decided that we want to present something to the younger grades of the school in an effort to reduce identify based bullying - not just anti-gay bullying, but religion based bullying, socioeconomic based bullying, gender based bullying, and race based bullying.
The biggest issue with this is that freshmen and sophomores are cynical by nature, and lecturing to them about bullying isn't going to be very effective, as I see it. Our current plan is to have students everyone looks up to speak, some college students speak, and have an administrator define bullying and what the consequences for bullying are. But I feel that it's not really going to get through the heads of young high-school kids: the kids that are the problem aren't going to be listening.
Has any MeFite done anything similar to this and had a positive reaction? How do you get through to those kids who think throwing slurs around is just fine, and that it's okay to treat the gay kid like trash all the time? Efforts at this school to reduce bullying before have usually been in the form of "use I-statements" and "remember the golden rule," or other presentations that, while well-meaning, are preaching to only the most upright portion of the choir.
So what are some innovative ways to get to those kids' heads and make them actually think about identity based bullying? Is it even possible?
I'm the president of my high school's GSA, and we've decided that we want to present something to the younger grades of the school in an effort to reduce identify based bullying - not just anti-gay bullying, but religion based bullying, socioeconomic based bullying, gender based bullying, and race based bullying.
The biggest issue with this is that freshmen and sophomores are cynical by nature, and lecturing to them about bullying isn't going to be very effective, as I see it. Our current plan is to have students everyone looks up to speak, some college students speak, and have an administrator define bullying and what the consequences for bullying are. But I feel that it's not really going to get through the heads of young high-school kids: the kids that are the problem aren't going to be listening.
Has any MeFite done anything similar to this and had a positive reaction? How do you get through to those kids who think throwing slurs around is just fine, and that it's okay to treat the gay kid like trash all the time? Efforts at this school to reduce bullying before have usually been in the form of "use I-statements" and "remember the golden rule," or other presentations that, while well-meaning, are preaching to only the most upright portion of the choir.
So what are some innovative ways to get to those kids' heads and make them actually think about identity based bullying? Is it even possible?
The biggest issue with this is that freshmen and sophomores are cynical by nature,
From an outsider's perspective, a person 2-3 years older than the target audience saying something that amounts to "kids these days" sounds incredibly pompous and will only ever turn the audience off. There is a big difference in maturity between a 15 year old and an 18 year old, to be sure, but the problem is that high school seniors don't consistently act mature enough and high school freshmen don't consistently act immature enough for any part of a presentation to be founded on this. I think you should make it a general presentation rather than single out freshmen/sophomores.
lecturing to them about bullying isn't going to be very effective, as I see it.
Bingo.
Our current plan is to have students everyone looks up to speak, some college students speak
Good. Familiarity is a good approach.
have an administrator define bullying and what the consequences for bullying are
This is something the target audience already knows, yes? Or is this a new policy? I'm concerned that having that mixed in with the immediate above message will dilute it and make it seem like just another press release / mandatory assembly from the school. IMO you would be better to distance yourself from that and work to make a strong, consistent presentation - and let the school reinforce its own policies (as opposed to just your advocacy, for, well, just not being a dick) separately.
Also, the "identity based bullying" message seems a bit muddled. I think you would do better to use those issues as a subset - maybe examples via personal anecdote - of the overall anti-bullying message; you'll get further with "Being a dick to anybody will get you shunned by a lot of interesting people and excluded from doing fun things" than with "Don't be a bully; here are four or five general categories of things that you need to work on."
Good luck!
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 2:39 PM on June 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
From an outsider's perspective, a person 2-3 years older than the target audience saying something that amounts to "kids these days" sounds incredibly pompous and will only ever turn the audience off. There is a big difference in maturity between a 15 year old and an 18 year old, to be sure, but the problem is that high school seniors don't consistently act mature enough and high school freshmen don't consistently act immature enough for any part of a presentation to be founded on this. I think you should make it a general presentation rather than single out freshmen/sophomores.
lecturing to them about bullying isn't going to be very effective, as I see it.
Bingo.
Our current plan is to have students everyone looks up to speak, some college students speak
Good. Familiarity is a good approach.
have an administrator define bullying and what the consequences for bullying are
This is something the target audience already knows, yes? Or is this a new policy? I'm concerned that having that mixed in with the immediate above message will dilute it and make it seem like just another press release / mandatory assembly from the school. IMO you would be better to distance yourself from that and work to make a strong, consistent presentation - and let the school reinforce its own policies (as opposed to just your advocacy, for, well, just not being a dick) separately.
Also, the "identity based bullying" message seems a bit muddled. I think you would do better to use those issues as a subset - maybe examples via personal anecdote - of the overall anti-bullying message; you'll get further with "Being a dick to anybody will get you shunned by a lot of interesting people and excluded from doing fun things" than with "Don't be a bully; here are four or five general categories of things that you need to work on."
Good luck!
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 2:39 PM on June 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Anything you can do to show things from the bully's point of view will help immeasurably. This being that a bully is someone who, through cowardice and misplaced aggression, abuses others is not in reality "A Bully" but is unto themselves a victim. If you have some time, there's been some bullying scenes in the TV show GLEE and countless other adolescent shows. Heck, the whole Farkus character of "A Christmas Story" was bully related.
Show kids there are way better, and easier, ways to be cool than by putting other people down.
Don't JUST focus on "if you're being bullied, chin up! Tell an adult!"...that's important. But it's also important to find the cure, not just the treatment. Bullies bully for a reason. Help them understand better outlets to express themselves.
posted by carlh at 2:40 PM on June 6, 2010
Show kids there are way better, and easier, ways to be cool than by putting other people down.
Don't JUST focus on "if you're being bullied, chin up! Tell an adult!"...that's important. But it's also important to find the cure, not just the treatment. Bullies bully for a reason. Help them understand better outlets to express themselves.
posted by carlh at 2:40 PM on June 6, 2010
Empathy-building exercises are key in antibullying programs. You can do this by doing a skit, then asking kids to identify what's going on (larger message, plus subtleties, as appropriate for age level) as well as what each member of the skit is likely to be feeling. It's also a good idea to have kids be able to engage in discussion, rather than just a purely didactic program, because you'll lose them fast. The discussion is an empathy exercise too... break up into small groups to have discussions about topics like "a time I felt confident", "a time I felt devalued by someone else", "a time I was unkind to someone else", etc.
posted by so_gracefully at 2:41 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by so_gracefully at 2:41 PM on June 6, 2010
@carlh: "This being that a bully is someone who, through cowardice and misplaced aggression, abuses others"
Unfortunately, that understanding of a bully is no longer the dominant model (and standing up to bullies doesn't make them stop; it tends to make them more aggressive). Bullying is a complex problem and isn't as easy as "that insecure kid is picking on others."
@Gadget: "This is something the target audience already knows, yes?"
In my experience, students are unfamiliar with school bullying codes unless there has been a recent bullying incident that drew media attention. They generally all vaguely know "bullying" is allowed but they have no idea what's included in would be SHOCKED to discover they're engaging in it/witnessing it. They also tend not to know the consequences for bullying, figuring it's a slap on the wrist like in the old days.
Parents are also unfamiliar with the bullying rules at schools and what bullying entails; they are often shocked when their child is suspended for vicious bullying of another student because they a) didn't know what their kid was up to and b) had no idea bullying could end in suspension. This isn't the OP's question, but bullying education should include parents -- parents bring a lot of non-peer pressure to bear on their kids to straighten up and fly right, and if Mom and Dad know that bullying behavior is going to result in a 3-day suspension, Junior's going to be getting a lot of pressure at home not to engage in that sort of thing. (But both kids and parents have GOT to know what constitutes bullying.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 2:56 PM on June 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Unfortunately, that understanding of a bully is no longer the dominant model (and standing up to bullies doesn't make them stop; it tends to make them more aggressive). Bullying is a complex problem and isn't as easy as "that insecure kid is picking on others."
@Gadget: "This is something the target audience already knows, yes?"
In my experience, students are unfamiliar with school bullying codes unless there has been a recent bullying incident that drew media attention. They generally all vaguely know "bullying" is allowed but they have no idea what's included in would be SHOCKED to discover they're engaging in it/witnessing it. They also tend not to know the consequences for bullying, figuring it's a slap on the wrist like in the old days.
Parents are also unfamiliar with the bullying rules at schools and what bullying entails; they are often shocked when their child is suspended for vicious bullying of another student because they a) didn't know what their kid was up to and b) had no idea bullying could end in suspension. This isn't the OP's question, but bullying education should include parents -- parents bring a lot of non-peer pressure to bear on their kids to straighten up and fly right, and if Mom and Dad know that bullying behavior is going to result in a 3-day suspension, Junior's going to be getting a lot of pressure at home not to engage in that sort of thing. (But both kids and parents have GOT to know what constitutes bullying.)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 2:56 PM on June 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
^is NOT allowed, obviously.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 2:59 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 2:59 PM on June 6, 2010
I haven't done this a lot with bullying, but I have sat through (and administered) a lot of PowerPoints, and I really really agree that a large assembly full of teenagers will not get too much out of a lecture-based presentation on bullying.
Without knowing too much about the possibilities for this presentation/ extent of administrative support, the absolute ideal, to me, is a small group based discussion or activity that mixes together students who don't really know one another (try around 20). This makes it so the kids can't get away with ignoring the discussion and don't have to show off for friends. Try to set things up so that discussion is possible if someone does have something to say, but not absolutely necessary/ there's a plan for kids who won't say anything. Different activities that I've tried is a short but fairly strong article about the topic (preferably that isn't cliche), having a speaker who somehow has a vested interest in the topic, or having some sort of scenario based activity to play out.
Also, don't just focus on the victims of bullying, because bullies already have a hard time empathizing with them. If you have a college student who will own up to it, have a couple of former bullies talk about what is wrong with bullying, why it's an immature and not cool thing to do, what outcomes came from them treating people like crap, and why they don't do it anymore.
posted by _cave at 3:05 PM on June 6, 2010
Without knowing too much about the possibilities for this presentation/ extent of administrative support, the absolute ideal, to me, is a small group based discussion or activity that mixes together students who don't really know one another (try around 20). This makes it so the kids can't get away with ignoring the discussion and don't have to show off for friends. Try to set things up so that discussion is possible if someone does have something to say, but not absolutely necessary/ there's a plan for kids who won't say anything. Different activities that I've tried is a short but fairly strong article about the topic (preferably that isn't cliche), having a speaker who somehow has a vested interest in the topic, or having some sort of scenario based activity to play out.
Also, don't just focus on the victims of bullying, because bullies already have a hard time empathizing with them. If you have a college student who will own up to it, have a couple of former bullies talk about what is wrong with bullying, why it's an immature and not cool thing to do, what outcomes came from them treating people like crap, and why they don't do it anymore.
posted by _cave at 3:05 PM on June 6, 2010
You might find it helpful to look up "Project 51". This is a parent initiated organization that addresses bullying in schools. The founder's son committed suicide after repeated bullying at school. I was just thinking about this kid today. The day he shot himself at school, a group of boys had dumped chili on him and pulled his pants down. Poor kid.
posted by effluvia at 3:07 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by effluvia at 3:07 PM on June 6, 2010
Just a random thought: Most people won't identify as "A Bully." I'm normal, he's normal, you're normal... Don't profile for "A Bully;" I'd aim to take the lecture in the direction of "the bully in YOU" (and how it gets out/expresses, how it better outlets, what YOU can do to make your classmates less bullied). It's not just a checklist to identify hoodlum-ism; it's an avoidable phenomenon that rears its ugly head from time to time even in the most normal of people.
posted by Ys at 3:07 PM on June 6, 2010 [4 favorites]
posted by Ys at 3:07 PM on June 6, 2010 [4 favorites]
Pink Shirt Day?
Maybe you could fine some examples on adults who behave like bullies and lose respect from others because of that.
posted by iviken at 3:21 PM on June 6, 2010
Maybe you could fine some examples on adults who behave like bullies and lose respect from others because of that.
posted by iviken at 3:21 PM on June 6, 2010
I do not have experience doing what you are doing, but I read a Newsweek article on Simon Cowell's particular brand of snarky critique as ushering in, and institutionalizing, our current American brand of bullying. The insights in the article struck me as spot on. I'm not sure if high school kids are really into American Idol, but if they are this article might provide an easy segue into conversation about the topic and a way for the freshman and sophomores to get past some of their cynicism as they prepare for the effort.
posted by tidecat at 3:22 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by tidecat at 3:22 PM on June 6, 2010
Check out Bullies to Buddies for a different approach. The focus is on to handle bullying behavior directly. The theory is that most kids are not professional bullies - many of the kids do it some of the time. Changing the response of the "victims" and bystanders will have more impact than just lecturing the kids about bad behavior.
posted by metahawk at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by metahawk at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2010
I agree with those who said many students won't identify themselves as bullies-- in 9th and 10th grade they are still developing the metacognition that allows them to take an objective look at themselves. Also, as a high school teacher I have noticed that many 9th and 10th graders are very sensitive to being judged (ironic when they're bullies, right?), which means that you wouldn't want to call them bullies but instead talk about bullying behaviors or actions separate from condemning the people who do them.
While a one-time presentation is nice, I'd encourage you to work with the school administration, faculty, and other student groups to create a more comprehensive long-term program. Rather than focus on anti-bullying, try to frame it as something positive you are striving for-- treating everyone better and creating a safe environment for everyone.
One suggestion: Investigate the possibility of creating a "Safe Zone" type of program, similar to those on many college campuses. Most of those programs focus on LGBT, but your school could create safe zones for all. Basically, teachers/clubs/teams would go through some sort of short training session together and sign a pledge. They would then display a safe zone logo on their classroom doors or somewhere else in the school, letting everyone know that they will not tolerate bullying behavior. The key, of course, is that they all have to speak up against bullying behaviors.
A better suggestion: Look into the Rachel's Challenge program. This program is founded on the idea that treating people with kindness can create a chain reaction, and the Rachel's Challenge foundation has already outlined all the long-term plans that would turn a one-time presentation into lasting change. I have not seen this program myself, but heard raves from friends (teachers, students, and parents) at a neighboring school. They say the initial presentation, about the life and beliefs of Columbine victim Rachel Scott, is incredibly powerful and that the follow-up program is very effective.
posted by scarnato at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2010
While a one-time presentation is nice, I'd encourage you to work with the school administration, faculty, and other student groups to create a more comprehensive long-term program. Rather than focus on anti-bullying, try to frame it as something positive you are striving for-- treating everyone better and creating a safe environment for everyone.
One suggestion: Investigate the possibility of creating a "Safe Zone" type of program, similar to those on many college campuses. Most of those programs focus on LGBT, but your school could create safe zones for all. Basically, teachers/clubs/teams would go through some sort of short training session together and sign a pledge. They would then display a safe zone logo on their classroom doors or somewhere else in the school, letting everyone know that they will not tolerate bullying behavior. The key, of course, is that they all have to speak up against bullying behaviors.
A better suggestion: Look into the Rachel's Challenge program. This program is founded on the idea that treating people with kindness can create a chain reaction, and the Rachel's Challenge foundation has already outlined all the long-term plans that would turn a one-time presentation into lasting change. I have not seen this program myself, but heard raves from friends (teachers, students, and parents) at a neighboring school. They say the initial presentation, about the life and beliefs of Columbine victim Rachel Scott, is incredibly powerful and that the follow-up program is very effective.
posted by scarnato at 4:07 PM on June 6, 2010
In the Life Media has a couple of video modules on this, IIRC. Could you show one or two and have a discussion afterwards?
Also, GLSEN's Think B4 You Speak campaign has downloadable materials for precisely these kinds of events.
posted by elizardbits at 4:17 PM on June 6, 2010
Also, GLSEN's Think B4 You Speak campaign has downloadable materials for precisely these kinds of events.
posted by elizardbits at 4:17 PM on June 6, 2010
(In the interest of full disclosure, my organization has worked with GLSEN on this project.)
posted by elizardbits at 4:20 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by elizardbits at 4:20 PM on June 6, 2010
Unfortunately, that understanding of a bully is no longer the dominant model (and standing up to bullies doesn't make them stop; it tends to make them more aggressive). Bullying is a complex problem and isn't as easy as "that insecure kid is picking on others."
@ Eyebrows McGee
I say without exception that every serious bully in my high school a decade ago came from a fractured home - low income, deadbeat parents, etc. Every casual bully (people who poked mean jokes at others) were part of cliques and were trying to boost themselves by putting down others. I stand firm in saying that kids acted out to directly demean others because they themselves felt a serious lacking in their own lives.
I don't know how much more "complex" it needs to be than that.
These kids need a better way to vent their frustrations and fears.
And I never said anything about kids "standing up to bullies"...perhaps the Farkus reference was a mistake seeing how that plotline played out...but I do still stand firm in saying an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Bullies are bully for a reason. It's not so complex they all need meaningless therapy. They need better outlets and enough credit to trust them to grow.
Some of the bullies in my school were very, very bright kids.
posted by carlh at 4:49 PM on June 6, 2010
Seconding the small groups idea. It's important to keep in mind that you want to put the students out of their comfort zone just enough to get them to think–without going any further. If you take it too far (i.e. forced skit making, etc), they'll just close up entirely. Also, try to describe what you will be doing as little as possible. By calling it an anti-bullying activity, you create the expectation in the students that they will be mindlessly bored by whatever is going to happen and that it doesn't apply to them. You essentially have to trick the students by doing something that's fun and immediate while simultaneously getting your point across without being too easily cliched and tuned out.
posted by ooklala at 5:07 PM on June 6, 2010
posted by ooklala at 5:07 PM on June 6, 2010
I think you'll need something for people to empathise with a lot more than lectures about bullying.
I'd suggest having students stand up and talk about their bullying experiences, both as the bully and as the bullied person. Extreme experiences would help. And then open the floor to discussion.
A short play acted by students that engages the audience would also be good, but I assume you don't have the kind of time frame to work on that.
posted by Omnomnom at 2:58 AM on June 7, 2010
I'd suggest having students stand up and talk about their bullying experiences, both as the bully and as the bullied person. Extreme experiences would help. And then open the floor to discussion.
A short play acted by students that engages the audience would also be good, but I assume you don't have the kind of time frame to work on that.
posted by Omnomnom at 2:58 AM on June 7, 2010
GLSEN has some resources for this. Here's a Jumpstart guide from them on conducting an anti-oppression workshop. You don't say the size of the group you'll be working with, so some of this may not work well with a larger group. A good ice breaker (again, wouldn't work if the group is too large) to make everyone feel connected to the issue is Step Forward, Step Back.
I was the president of my high school's GSA and did a fair amount of these sorts of trainings in my school and others in the area. Feel free to MeFi Mail me if you need any more help with this. Good luck!
(Full disclosure: I no longer have any connection with GLSEN, but did volunteer with them consistently for a few years in high school.)
posted by cheerwine at 7:29 AM on June 7, 2010
I was the president of my high school's GSA and did a fair amount of these sorts of trainings in my school and others in the area. Feel free to MeFi Mail me if you need any more help with this. Good luck!
(Full disclosure: I no longer have any connection with GLSEN, but did volunteer with them consistently for a few years in high school.)
posted by cheerwine at 7:29 AM on June 7, 2010
Sorry, a lot of these suggestions are very Adult-Approved feelings-based messages that have no actual relevance to kids whatsoever. No one is ever going to get out of bulling by pointing out that the bully is just insecure. Kids talking about "a time they feel confident" is the kind of meaningless busy work that kids will tolerate because at least they're not doing real work. A play is another sort or eye roll-inducing assembly that will come across as cool and relevant as anti-drug and smoking assemblies that feature white cops and vice-principals trying to sing rap songs from two summers ago. They won't pay attention and they won't care.
Whatever the the psychological or socio-economic ultimate causes of bullying are, the proximate causes are a desire increase one's standing with a certain group. The way to reduce bullying is to make the action less socially rewarding. Bullies don't always stop when resisted, but they stop when they are shamed or humiliated. You need to create a culture where the actions of a bully aren't seen as funny, but as stupid, abnormal and juvenile.
Peer leaders can set a tone, and with high school kids (and, basically, with all of us), the real peer leaders are the hottest and coolest among us. Get the coolest people. It doesn't matter if they're funny stoners or game-winning jocks, whoever your peers think are totally awesome will be able to set a tone. Also, get the hottest kids in your school. Have them talk about how stupid bullying is, how bullies are made fun of and disrespected even if they get a laugh tripping the nerd or calling the drama people gay. Have them say how bullies act like little kids and rarely actually have friends. Have them point out that no one trusts people who talk behind others' backs, and so, everyone will believe rumors about bullies.
If this sticks, and people adopt this outlook because the elites do, bullying will cost social capital rather than earn it, and it will happen less.
posted by spaltavian at 10:15 AM on June 7, 2010
Whatever the the psychological or socio-economic ultimate causes of bullying are, the proximate causes are a desire increase one's standing with a certain group. The way to reduce bullying is to make the action less socially rewarding. Bullies don't always stop when resisted, but they stop when they are shamed or humiliated. You need to create a culture where the actions of a bully aren't seen as funny, but as stupid, abnormal and juvenile.
Peer leaders can set a tone, and with high school kids (and, basically, with all of us), the real peer leaders are the hottest and coolest among us. Get the coolest people. It doesn't matter if they're funny stoners or game-winning jocks, whoever your peers think are totally awesome will be able to set a tone. Also, get the hottest kids in your school. Have them talk about how stupid bullying is, how bullies are made fun of and disrespected even if they get a laugh tripping the nerd or calling the drama people gay. Have them say how bullies act like little kids and rarely actually have friends. Have them point out that no one trusts people who talk behind others' backs, and so, everyone will believe rumors about bullies.
If this sticks, and people adopt this outlook because the elites do, bullying will cost social capital rather than earn it, and it will happen less.
posted by spaltavian at 10:15 AM on June 7, 2010
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posted by MsKim at 2:31 PM on June 6, 2010