the city...! the lights! the bustle! ...the traffic?
May 7, 2010 12:01 PM Subscribe
how do you keep your cool driving in crazy city traffic? (i'm looking at you, los angeles and san francisco!)
ok metafilter, here's the (somewhat embarrassing) deal: i spent a good chunk of my teens and early 20s terrified of driving. i used to be able to get by with public transit and a generous combo of friends/boyfriend but as i got older and moved somewhere where you basically have to drive everywhere i realized i had to get over it. since then i've become a reasonably decent driver. i live and work in a suburb-y area of silicon valley. my daily normal driving is fine.
the problem? everything goes out the window when i have to go into the city. in the city i'm suddenly the worst driver in the entire world. i get frazzled by the number of people, the total lack of logic in a lot of the streets (why is everything suddenly 1 way only?? why can't i turn here? etc), the not-afraid-of-dying taxi drivers, the pedestrians who can't seem to wait to just dive in front of my car. suddenly i'm running red lights, pissing people off with merging, and almost getting into accidents because i'm so damned frazzled. worse still, it can ruin my whole day because i'll feel so shaky and pissed off from the bad driving experience.
how do you stay calm when driving in cities with notoriously bad traffic/driving? i feel like im contributing to the problem when usually i'm such an okay driver, just because i'm freaked out. in particular i have problems with san francisco. this isn't a problem that can be solved by "take the bart train" since i live in the south bay and i go to a lot of music events and performances that may not end until 1 or 2 am, and the trains stop running to where i live by about 11:30. i also drive down to los angeles every so often, which is a whole other kettle of fish given how much angrier all the drivers on the road seem down there.
how do you keep your calm and remain a good driver during city driving when there's so much external chaos? i'd actually also be really interested in hearing from new york city drivers since i'm there a lot (my sister lives there) and it seems to be the benchmark of OMG crazy city driving, and my brother-in-law's only advice is "you have to be extremely aggressive" which was not very helpful and only makes me more frazzled.
ok metafilter, here's the (somewhat embarrassing) deal: i spent a good chunk of my teens and early 20s terrified of driving. i used to be able to get by with public transit and a generous combo of friends/boyfriend but as i got older and moved somewhere where you basically have to drive everywhere i realized i had to get over it. since then i've become a reasonably decent driver. i live and work in a suburb-y area of silicon valley. my daily normal driving is fine.
the problem? everything goes out the window when i have to go into the city. in the city i'm suddenly the worst driver in the entire world. i get frazzled by the number of people, the total lack of logic in a lot of the streets (why is everything suddenly 1 way only?? why can't i turn here? etc), the not-afraid-of-dying taxi drivers, the pedestrians who can't seem to wait to just dive in front of my car. suddenly i'm running red lights, pissing people off with merging, and almost getting into accidents because i'm so damned frazzled. worse still, it can ruin my whole day because i'll feel so shaky and pissed off from the bad driving experience.
how do you stay calm when driving in cities with notoriously bad traffic/driving? i feel like im contributing to the problem when usually i'm such an okay driver, just because i'm freaked out. in particular i have problems with san francisco. this isn't a problem that can be solved by "take the bart train" since i live in the south bay and i go to a lot of music events and performances that may not end until 1 or 2 am, and the trains stop running to where i live by about 11:30. i also drive down to los angeles every so often, which is a whole other kettle of fish given how much angrier all the drivers on the road seem down there.
how do you keep your calm and remain a good driver during city driving when there's so much external chaos? i'd actually also be really interested in hearing from new york city drivers since i'm there a lot (my sister lives there) and it seems to be the benchmark of OMG crazy city driving, and my brother-in-law's only advice is "you have to be extremely aggressive" which was not very helpful and only makes me more frazzled.
Best answer: To some extent it's just practice. The more you do it, the more in control you'll feel. Be sure you know where you're going, tot he extent that you can, buy consulting a good map before you leave. Turn off the radio. Leave extra early so you can take your time. Let the assholes get in front on you and don't sweat it. They'll end up in a car crash some day for all their bad behavior. Be a good driver and be courteous. You'll feel better and stay calmer if you're not treating the drive as a competition. You'll get there when you get there.
As a daily city driver in San Francisco, I do believe that there are way worse places to be driving in the United States. Boston always seems particularly ridiculous to me.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:09 PM on May 7, 2010 [4 favorites]
As a daily city driver in San Francisco, I do believe that there are way worse places to be driving in the United States. Boston always seems particularly ridiculous to me.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:09 PM on May 7, 2010 [4 favorites]
"Be sure you know where you're going, to the extent that you can, by consulting a good map before you leave" is what I meant to say.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:10 PM on May 7, 2010
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:10 PM on May 7, 2010
I'm taking driving lessons in SF and I feel more comfortable on Market and going through the Mission and the Marina than than I have in the suburbs. I don't have it all down yet, but basically mzurer is right -- take it slowly.
I'm in the middle of what feels like trying ALL of them... so MeMail me if you want recommendations for specific schools :)
posted by tantivy at 12:15 PM on May 7, 2010
I'm in the middle of what feels like trying ALL of them... so MeMail me if you want recommendations for specific schools :)
posted by tantivy at 12:15 PM on May 7, 2010
It *is* practice. I drive around NYC quite a bit, and I love it. You just have to get wit the flow. It helps to know where you're going, so you can strategically plan your lane changes (consider getting a GPS, maybe?), but city driving does have its own logic. All I can say is that it takes time discovering that logic and making it your own.
posted by monospace at 12:17 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by monospace at 12:17 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Be sure you know where you're going, to the extent that you can, by consulting a good map before you leave
Buying a GPS helps for this too. It's nice to be able to stop worrying about getting lost because you know even if you miss a turn it will reroute you.
posted by burnmp3s at 12:17 PM on May 7, 2010
Buying a GPS helps for this too. It's nice to be able to stop worrying about getting lost because you know even if you miss a turn it will reroute you.
posted by burnmp3s at 12:17 PM on May 7, 2010
And as a corollary to slow down, leave yourself plenty of time to get where you are going. If you aren't rushed you won't feel the need to be aggressive about trying to get every road advantage. If you aren't being aggressive you won't have half the worries you have now.
That's not to say that you won't have to be aggressive some of the time, just don't be that way all the time.
posted by mmascolino at 12:18 PM on May 7, 2010
That's not to say that you won't have to be aggressive some of the time, just don't be that way all the time.
posted by mmascolino at 12:18 PM on May 7, 2010
I always hated driving in downtown Philly with narrow streets, crazy drivers with lack of blinkers, and one way streets. I combated this by driving when traffic is light; 1am-3am on weekdays. It helped to calm my nerves during heavy traffic. As otherwordlyglow stated, practice makes perfect.
posted by daninnj at 12:20 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by daninnj at 12:20 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Oh my God, I just figured this out myself after a week of going mad stuck in San Francisco traffic. BOOKS ON TAPE. Really. I was jammed on 280 into Third Street this morning and instead of punching the wheel, as it my wont, I was calmly listening to Margaret MacMillan's wonderful Paris 1919. I can't claim credit - I got the idea from a post on Kevin Kelly's Cool Tools - but it really has transformed driving from a dreaded chore into extra reading time.
posted by rdc at 12:22 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by rdc at 12:22 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: thank you for the replies so far, they're helpful!
for reference i have and use a garmin gps but i wish it would tell me sooner in advance when i need to turn so that i can prepare which lane i need to be in instead of hurriedly trying to get into that lane when the gps tells me... i usually press that option that lets me see the whole directions as a list before i depart but if i'm traveling pretty far i'm not going to in advance remember every single left and right :(
posted by raw sugar at 12:22 PM on May 7, 2010
for reference i have and use a garmin gps but i wish it would tell me sooner in advance when i need to turn so that i can prepare which lane i need to be in instead of hurriedly trying to get into that lane when the gps tells me... i usually press that option that lets me see the whole directions as a list before i depart but if i'm traveling pretty far i'm not going to in advance remember every single left and right :(
posted by raw sugar at 12:22 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: Obviously you should adapt this to your own style, but your brother in law is on to something. I think that one of the reasons that some people don't like driving in the city is because they are not aggressive enough in certain situations, like merging. To a certain extent, merging in a high traffic area is one part timing, and one part counting on the fact that other people will get out of your way because they don't want to be hit. Problems arise when people wait for the perfect space to enter, which may not occur.
For example, truck drivers seem to have merging down. They pick the best space to merge that they can, they signal, and then they slowly and consistently move into the space, counting on others to make a space for them.
Another thing that may be helpful is to drive in the city at night, when there is a lower volume of traffic. This may allow you get used to the one-way streets and environmental cues, without the stress of all the other drivers.
posted by 517 at 12:24 PM on May 7, 2010 [3 favorites]
For example, truck drivers seem to have merging down. They pick the best space to merge that they can, they signal, and then they slowly and consistently move into the space, counting on others to make a space for them.
Another thing that may be helpful is to drive in the city at night, when there is a lower volume of traffic. This may allow you get used to the one-way streets and environmental cues, without the stress of all the other drivers.
posted by 517 at 12:24 PM on May 7, 2010 [3 favorites]
Best answer: Know your routes - if you can, come up to SF at some (relatively!) non-traffic-y time when you don't have to be somewhere at a particular time, and practice getting from the freeway to the Fillmore or Independent or wherever the shows you go to tend to be. Memorize what lane(s) you want to be in when so you're not having to slide across three lanes of traffic in half a block because - oops! - you have to make a right turn up there.
As much as possible, take your time. Leave enough time to miss that turn so you don't end up freaking out because you have to go around the block (or in some cases here, two or four blocks) to get back to where you need to go.
I just got back from a trip to England, and we did a fair amount of driving there. I drove too slow, I sometimes edged towards (or actually did) driving on the incorrect side of the street, etc. It made me hope that other drivers weren't thinking the kinds of evil thoughts I tend to think at people I encounter here who aren't driving they way *I* want them to drive (i.e. like they know what they're doing and where they're going), and I'm going to try to not think evil thoughts like that anymore. If someone cuts you off or honks at you, try not think "Oh shit, they hate me!" or "Fuck off, asshole, I'm trying to not kill the stupid pedestrian in front of me!" Try to think kinder, more peaceful thoughts, which in turn will help keep you calmer as you navigate our sort of confusing city.
otherwordlyglow, I learned to drive in Boston, and now drive in SF, and I agree with you!
posted by rtha at 12:26 PM on May 7, 2010
As much as possible, take your time. Leave enough time to miss that turn so you don't end up freaking out because you have to go around the block (or in some cases here, two or four blocks) to get back to where you need to go.
I just got back from a trip to England, and we did a fair amount of driving there. I drove too slow, I sometimes edged towards (or actually did) driving on the incorrect side of the street, etc. It made me hope that other drivers weren't thinking the kinds of evil thoughts I tend to think at people I encounter here who aren't driving they way *I* want them to drive (i.e. like they know what they're doing and where they're going), and I'm going to try to not think evil thoughts like that anymore. If someone cuts you off or honks at you, try not think "Oh shit, they hate me!" or "Fuck off, asshole, I'm trying to not kill the stupid pedestrian in front of me!" Try to think kinder, more peaceful thoughts, which in turn will help keep you calmer as you navigate our sort of confusing city.
otherwordlyglow, I learned to drive in Boston, and now drive in SF, and I agree with you!
posted by rtha at 12:26 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: There are driving techniques, and mental techniques, and some that are part-way between. Some that I've found helpful are:
Leave plenty of space in front of your car, even if other people are not doing that. This will give you more time to see what's going on, and gives you more options. If your lane is blocked or ends, and you're up close to the car in front of you, when that car merges into another lane, you might find yourself forced to merge really quickly also, because you suddenly see you don't have room to stop if necessary. Whereas if you leave more space, you've got time to sort out merging safely, and to come to a stop if you must.
If you find you've come to a stop and have to merge into a lane of moving traffic, put your signal on and wait until there's enough of a gap to do it safely. Some nice person may even stop to let you in. Don't feel you have to dart into a moving lane and require someone else to slam on the brakes, no matter how long you've been waiting there. Even if people behind you are honking.
In fact as a general technique, try not to feel pressured to do something dangerous the longer you're waiting. This open happens when making a left turn with no traffic controls to stop the oncoming traffic for you. People tend to start out waiting for a decent gap, and the longer they sit there, the more willing they are to risk turning in a smaller gap. Just try to ignore that feeling and ignore honking horns behind you. You do not have to hurry.
Slow down if you feel uncomfortable. Resist the pressure to keep up with traffic especially in an unfamiliar city. Spirited driving on a road you know can be fun if you're that kind of person, but it's very stressful when it feels unsafe to you.
Mentally separate "driving" and "navigation", and prioritize "driving" first at all times. What I mean is if you find yourself in the wrong lane to make a turn, or missing an off ramp, or the road splits in two and you're on the wrong side, or the street you planned to go down is a one-way the wrong way, just drive normally and miss your turn, instead of doing something crazy to stay on your planned route. Passengers find it really weird when I do this. "Hey, you missed the street!" they say. "Yeah, but we're still alive, isn't that nice?" I reply.
Drive like you're just out to practice driving, without any destination in mind, because you can do this just by looking at the road and the signs, without any idea of where you are or where you want to go. When you can (e.g. driving is not requiring your full attention), figure out how to correct your navigation well in advance so you can be in the proper lane or what have you to get back onto your route. If you keep getting lost, pull over somewhere safe and do the navigating at a stop, so that once you're driving again, you'll know where you need to be well in advance again.
posted by FishBike at 12:27 PM on May 7, 2010 [6 favorites]
Leave plenty of space in front of your car, even if other people are not doing that. This will give you more time to see what's going on, and gives you more options. If your lane is blocked or ends, and you're up close to the car in front of you, when that car merges into another lane, you might find yourself forced to merge really quickly also, because you suddenly see you don't have room to stop if necessary. Whereas if you leave more space, you've got time to sort out merging safely, and to come to a stop if you must.
If you find you've come to a stop and have to merge into a lane of moving traffic, put your signal on and wait until there's enough of a gap to do it safely. Some nice person may even stop to let you in. Don't feel you have to dart into a moving lane and require someone else to slam on the brakes, no matter how long you've been waiting there. Even if people behind you are honking.
In fact as a general technique, try not to feel pressured to do something dangerous the longer you're waiting. This open happens when making a left turn with no traffic controls to stop the oncoming traffic for you. People tend to start out waiting for a decent gap, and the longer they sit there, the more willing they are to risk turning in a smaller gap. Just try to ignore that feeling and ignore honking horns behind you. You do not have to hurry.
Slow down if you feel uncomfortable. Resist the pressure to keep up with traffic especially in an unfamiliar city. Spirited driving on a road you know can be fun if you're that kind of person, but it's very stressful when it feels unsafe to you.
Mentally separate "driving" and "navigation", and prioritize "driving" first at all times. What I mean is if you find yourself in the wrong lane to make a turn, or missing an off ramp, or the road splits in two and you're on the wrong side, or the street you planned to go down is a one-way the wrong way, just drive normally and miss your turn, instead of doing something crazy to stay on your planned route. Passengers find it really weird when I do this. "Hey, you missed the street!" they say. "Yeah, but we're still alive, isn't that nice?" I reply.
Drive like you're just out to practice driving, without any destination in mind, because you can do this just by looking at the road and the signs, without any idea of where you are or where you want to go. When you can (e.g. driving is not requiring your full attention), figure out how to correct your navigation well in advance so you can be in the proper lane or what have you to get back onto your route. If you keep getting lost, pull over somewhere safe and do the navigating at a stop, so that once you're driving again, you'll know where you need to be well in advance again.
posted by FishBike at 12:27 PM on May 7, 2010 [6 favorites]
but i wish it would tell me sooner in advance when i need to turn so that i can prepare which lane i need to be in instead of hurriedly trying to get into that lane when the gps tells me..
Precisely why you should have a map to study. GPS is great but you really need to get a better mental map of where you're going so that you aren't always just reacting to the GPS. Figure out the route in advance and at least have a general sense of where you're going and where your exit will be. San Francisco can really be confusing at first but once you have a general sense of how the roads make a network and where the major hubs are, you'll be much better off.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:29 PM on May 7, 2010
Precisely why you should have a map to study. GPS is great but you really need to get a better mental map of where you're going so that you aren't always just reacting to the GPS. Figure out the route in advance and at least have a general sense of where you're going and where your exit will be. San Francisco can really be confusing at first but once you have a general sense of how the roads make a network and where the major hubs are, you'll be much better off.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 12:29 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: Google Maps. I have the same issue with GPSes. And I'm a good driver, but I get extremely stressed out and frazzled when I don't know where I'm going. I have no innate sense of direction and if left to my own devices I'd just drive around in circles. So - plan your route out ahead of time. Print it if you have to. You only need to remember the next turn or so, and if it's printed out you can always just glance at it without fiddling with anything. Also, have a way to access maps in the car. The little GPS screens are too small. Either a map book, or google maps on your phone. I can't tell you how many times I've just pulled into a parking lot to figure out exactly where I need to go.
And just slow it down you get into a situation where you're feeling pressured to move. Ignore the honking if it occurs. You'd rather get honked at than get hit. And if you can't get into your lane -- no biggie. Just take the next street/exit and if needed pull over, and recalculate your route.
posted by cgg at 12:32 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
And just slow it down you get into a situation where you're feeling pressured to move. Ignore the honking if it occurs. You'd rather get honked at than get hit. And if you can't get into your lane -- no biggie. Just take the next street/exit and if needed pull over, and recalculate your route.
posted by cgg at 12:32 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Best answer: I've been driving for 25 years in Los Angeles and have driven everything from a motorcycle to a stretch limousine to a 22 ft. truck. I recently taught a friend to drive after 20 years in London and NYC without a car. He said that the best advice I gave him was regarding turning.
I noticed he was still looking back toward oncoming traffic into a turn. That meant he had to take the turn excessively slowly resulting in honking and other aggressiveness from drivers. My advice was: Once you check oncoming traffic and you are sure there are no cars coming your way, you look forward and make the turn. As long as you made sure, you have to trust that you saw no oncoming traffic.
Overall, do not hesitate. Drive or do not drive. When you hesitate, people do not know what you are planning and they get angry and frustrated with you.
posted by Sophie1 at 12:34 PM on May 7, 2010 [3 favorites]
I noticed he was still looking back toward oncoming traffic into a turn. That meant he had to take the turn excessively slowly resulting in honking and other aggressiveness from drivers. My advice was: Once you check oncoming traffic and you are sure there are no cars coming your way, you look forward and make the turn. As long as you made sure, you have to trust that you saw no oncoming traffic.
Overall, do not hesitate. Drive or do not drive. When you hesitate, people do not know what you are planning and they get angry and frustrated with you.
posted by Sophie1 at 12:34 PM on May 7, 2010 [3 favorites]
The name of the game is fail safe[ly], not fail dangerously like your brother in law would have you do.
Aside from all the above suggestions which helped me enormously, I made a habit of driving into the city (Boston, fender bender capital of the world) early Saturday or Sunday (i.e. be there for 7am) to tackle the rough spots when there weren't many people out and about. Then I could get the feel for the flow and be more confident when everyone was around (and drive at their speed).
Back then I rarely drove anyplace new without practicing it once first, to ensure I'd be on time and stress free. At a certain point it'll feel stupid since you'll know everything so well. That's your clue that you're proficient and can have some self-confidence for new experiences without practice.
The big problem these days is they don't keep the lanes painted well so I'm often 'enforcing' lanes that no one sees anymore and thus doesn't bother with. It seems like a group effort though - one person tries to keep the order and others fall in behind them.
I also use back roads exclusively for the afternoon commute (50 miles) now. People are just too crazy on the highways then. I didn't properly realize it till my wife started commuting with me. The stresses I put up with suddenly weren't so acceptable. Believe it or not, we get home in the same time too. Draw a straight line, test it, then route around problem areas as you encounter them and test again. Repeat. Learn the highways first though, just remember to leave space for you to stop, stay out of the fast lane, and you'll be ok.
posted by jwells at 12:41 PM on May 7, 2010
Aside from all the above suggestions which helped me enormously, I made a habit of driving into the city (Boston, fender bender capital of the world) early Saturday or Sunday (i.e. be there for 7am) to tackle the rough spots when there weren't many people out and about. Then I could get the feel for the flow and be more confident when everyone was around (and drive at their speed).
Back then I rarely drove anyplace new without practicing it once first, to ensure I'd be on time and stress free. At a certain point it'll feel stupid since you'll know everything so well. That's your clue that you're proficient and can have some self-confidence for new experiences without practice.
The big problem these days is they don't keep the lanes painted well so I'm often 'enforcing' lanes that no one sees anymore and thus doesn't bother with. It seems like a group effort though - one person tries to keep the order and others fall in behind them.
I also use back roads exclusively for the afternoon commute (50 miles) now. People are just too crazy on the highways then. I didn't properly realize it till my wife started commuting with me. The stresses I put up with suddenly weren't so acceptable. Believe it or not, we get home in the same time too. Draw a straight line, test it, then route around problem areas as you encounter them and test again. Repeat. Learn the highways first though, just remember to leave space for you to stop, stay out of the fast lane, and you'll be ok.
posted by jwells at 12:41 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: I think the GPS might be hurting, not helping - it keeps you from learning the layout of the city. It's so much easier to drive when you KNOW where you're going and what lane to be in, and you don't have to rely on a map/GPS. I agree with all the advice to study maps, and I would use the GPS as a backup, and try not to rely on it too much.
posted by insectosaurus at 12:48 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by insectosaurus at 12:48 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
It sounds like you are mostly talking about city street driving, but let me say on the freeways "just slow down" is bad advice if you are in the #1 lane (counting from the left). If you're slowing down traffic in the (ha ha) fast lane, you are going to be treated extremely rudely.
Beyond that, I'm always surprised at how many people just follow the google maps directions and take some super-crowded main artery, when there might be a better route that might be just a bit more out of the way. If you are moving you will likely be less stressed than if you are always stopped. Pre-plan before you go, but try a few different routes until you find one that works. I recall a (possibly apocryphal) comment I heard when a person asked Elizabeth Taylor for advice for new actors on how to make it in Hollywood, and she said "Take Fountain". [For Fountain specifically, that advice isnt as good as when that comment was made, but LA is full of good secondary routes that you can try]
posted by Spurious Packets at 12:54 PM on May 7, 2010
Beyond that, I'm always surprised at how many people just follow the google maps directions and take some super-crowded main artery, when there might be a better route that might be just a bit more out of the way. If you are moving you will likely be less stressed than if you are always stopped. Pre-plan before you go, but try a few different routes until you find one that works. I recall a (possibly apocryphal) comment I heard when a person asked Elizabeth Taylor for advice for new actors on how to make it in Hollywood, and she said "Take Fountain". [For Fountain specifically, that advice isnt as good as when that comment was made, but LA is full of good secondary routes that you can try]
posted by Spurious Packets at 12:54 PM on May 7, 2010
Mentally separate "driving" and "navigation", and prioritize "driving" first at all times. What I mean is if you find yourself in the wrong lane to make a turn, or missing an off ramp, or the road splits in two and you're on the wrong side, or the street you planned to go down is a one-way the wrong way, just drive normally and miss your turn, instead of doing something crazy to stay on your planned route. Passengers find it really weird when I do this. "Hey, you missed the street!" they say. "Yeah, but we're still alive, isn't that nice?" I reply.
A million times this. Drive first, navigate second, and never ever fiddle with the GPS while driving. Pull over or miss your turn if you must; you won't be that late.
posted by slow graffiti at 1:19 PM on May 7, 2010
A million times this. Drive first, navigate second, and never ever fiddle with the GPS while driving. Pull over or miss your turn if you must; you won't be that late.
posted by slow graffiti at 1:19 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: My advice- plan your route ahead of time. When I do this, I write the directions out in a way that allows me to plan my lanes and such more easily. Google Maps Directions does this almost the way I do. Come up with a system that you can refer to quickly. Follow your route on the map (or just in your head) and make sure it works.
And have a map out and ready to refer to if you get mixed up.
And sometimes the "best" route isn't the easiest route. I drive a lot for work, and I will drive significantly out of my way to avoid terrible left turns. It tends to save time, and if not, sanity.
But yeah, GPS if for amateurs. Just following directions is a great way to not be connected to the roadways and paying attention to where you are.
Finally, if traffic is bad, learn to just give up. If you don't like merging, pick a lane and stick to it. Better to get there slower and peacefully than slightly faster and wigged out of your mind.
posted by gjc at 1:52 PM on May 7, 2010
And have a map out and ready to refer to if you get mixed up.
And sometimes the "best" route isn't the easiest route. I drive a lot for work, and I will drive significantly out of my way to avoid terrible left turns. It tends to save time, and if not, sanity.
But yeah, GPS if for amateurs. Just following directions is a great way to not be connected to the roadways and paying attention to where you are.
Finally, if traffic is bad, learn to just give up. If you don't like merging, pick a lane and stick to it. Better to get there slower and peacefully than slightly faster and wigged out of your mind.
posted by gjc at 1:52 PM on May 7, 2010
1. "What I mean is if you find yourself in the wrong lane to make a turn, or missing an off ramp, or the road splits in two and you're on the wrong side, or the street you planned to go down is a one-way the wrong way, just drive normally and miss your turn, instead of doing something crazy to stay on your planned route" yes, just allow yourself the freedom to *miss a turn*, or take a longer, less stressful route. whatever makes you most comfortable. the world will not end, and you will feel safer knowing you're driving well
2. classical music. something about it just lowers my blood pressure, making it nearly impossible to get wound up. (and yes, i figured this out while driving in Boston and trying to eliminate my road rage!)
posted by wayward vagabond at 2:15 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
2. classical music. something about it just lowers my blood pressure, making it nearly impossible to get wound up. (and yes, i figured this out while driving in Boston and trying to eliminate my road rage!)
posted by wayward vagabond at 2:15 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
San Francisco is especially nerve-racking because of its geography: tons of hills, tons of unexpected turns and twists, tons of one-way streets with no warning, tons of traffic. And really, really poor signage, as well. I have never been more terrified than when I was learning to drive and I chose Powell Street going down to Market as a test case.
As others have said, knowing the lay of the land is key. Whenever I move somewhere new, I like to drive without any particular destination for a time just to get a feel for the layout of the area. Once the geography is somewhat second-nature, a lot of the tension dissipates.
I have learned that I do much, much better when I try to be calm and yielding in traffic, even when it seems like every single driver on the road other than me is being a complete asshole, than I am when I am aggressive, maniacal, hurried, and trying to one-up the person who's being a jerk. And it makes my blood pressure happy as well.
posted by blucevalo at 2:18 PM on May 7, 2010
As others have said, knowing the lay of the land is key. Whenever I move somewhere new, I like to drive without any particular destination for a time just to get a feel for the layout of the area. Once the geography is somewhat second-nature, a lot of the tension dissipates.
I have learned that I do much, much better when I try to be calm and yielding in traffic, even when it seems like every single driver on the road other than me is being a complete asshole, than I am when I am aggressive, maniacal, hurried, and trying to one-up the person who's being a jerk. And it makes my blood pressure happy as well.
posted by blucevalo at 2:18 PM on May 7, 2010
There's a lot of good advice above (pore over a map some before you leave, practice, know where you're going, etc.) but one thing I haven't seen emphasized is to use your signals.
Communication with other drivers around you is key to keeping frazzlement low. People honk when they don't understand what you're trying to do while you're in their way. Use your turn signals and brake lights to help communicate what you intend to do. Signal turns before you begin to brake for them.
If you are unsure what to do, what to do is park and consult a map.
posted by carsonb at 2:23 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Communication with other drivers around you is key to keeping frazzlement low. People honk when they don't understand what you're trying to do while you're in their way. Use your turn signals and brake lights to help communicate what you intend to do. Signal turns before you begin to brake for them.
If you are unsure what to do, what to do is park and consult a map.
posted by carsonb at 2:23 PM on May 7, 2010 [1 favorite]
Best answer: San Francisco has pairs of one-way streets with timed lights that get you across town quickly. Bush and Pine run east-west, as do Oak and Fell. Franklin and Gough run north-south (take them instead of Van Ness if possible).
The layout's confusing because there are a couple of street grids at angles to each other, and they collide at Market Street. I don't have a solution for that other than to figure out which streets you can cross Market on.
posted by kirkaracha at 3:13 PM on May 7, 2010
The layout's confusing because there are a couple of street grids at angles to each other, and they collide at Market Street. I don't have a solution for that other than to figure out which streets you can cross Market on.
posted by kirkaracha at 3:13 PM on May 7, 2010
I was going to say what fishbike said about not freaking out if you miss your expected turn. If you know you need to go left, and can't, take the next one. This requires having an idea of the proper direction you want to go, but even knowing generally helps.
I almost had a panic attack in one of those giant, fast-paced roundabouts in Boston. We just don't do circles out here!
posted by grapesaresour at 4:08 PM on May 7, 2010
I almost had a panic attack in one of those giant, fast-paced roundabouts in Boston. We just don't do circles out here!
posted by grapesaresour at 4:08 PM on May 7, 2010
Best answer: In SF it helps to be proactively make peace with the horrible, horrible habits of the road.
posted by muscat at 5:09 PM on May 7, 2010 [5 favorites]
- On the highway, nobody will "let you in..." EVER. Trying to get right to get off at your exit? That guy in your blind spot thinks you're trying to get one over on him, and when he sees your signal he will actually speed up. Likewise when merging onto the freeway. Likewise when signaling to switch lanes in the city. That blinker is like a middle finger to people, and they will not have it. This is why you see so many taxi drivers who don't signal. You have to learn to TAKE the position.
- Forget about people yielding to you if you are pulling out of a driveway or a parking spot. Expect them to gun it to intimidate you into stopping so they are not inconvenienced slightly. If you do continue backing up and they have to brake, expect a blaring horn and a temper tantrum.
- Forget about making that right turn while the light is still green, or even yellow. The pedestrians have the right of way and will luxuriate in it. Just accept the fact that someone will be strolling in the street while you're sitting there with oncoming traffic about to bear down on you. Also, expect that oncoming traffic to blare their horns at you, even though you obviously can't do anything about your predicament.
- If you find yourself caught behind someone who stops suddenly (like, with their flashers on to pick up their friend) just get out a book or something. The guy behind you will swing out as fast as he can to make sure he beats you to going around the blockage. Then, every other person will do the same, driving even faster if you inch around. You WILL be trapped until everyone behind you has passed.
- Don't assume that people respect the "order of arrival means order to proceed" at 4 way stops. The person in the most expensive car is the one who goes first. and finally
- horns in downtown SF do not mean there is imminent danger. It just means that someone disagrees with your driving, and feels compelled to let you know.
posted by muscat at 5:09 PM on May 7, 2010 [5 favorites]
i'd actually also be really interested in hearing from new york city drivers since i'm there a lot (my sister lives there) and it seems to be the benchmark of OMG crazy city driving, and my brother-in-law's only advice is "you have to be extremely aggressive" which was not very helpful and only makes me more frazzled.
Yeah, NYC is not the benchmark of OMG crazy city driving. NYC driving is actually quite simple; it's all about the alternate merge.
"You have to be extremely agressive" is bullshit, and if your brother-in-law is driving that way, he's probably getting where he's going but pissing off a lot of other drivers. Extreme aggressiveness is entirely unnecessary; you just need to put on your signal and edge over when you have an opening. Most drivers are happy to accommodate, and once you get in the groove of things, it's really not stressful at all.
Also, I agree entirely with other posters who've said a mental (or paper) map of where you're going is far better than GPS. If you can't get into the lane you want to be in to make your turn, it shouldn't be a huge deal. You need to know the territory well enough to be able to go around the block, now and then, to adjust for the wrong turn/inability to turn/whatever. And every time you do this, you're expanding your knowledge of possible alternate routes.
One last point--what I love most about driving in NYC is the people-watching! This is what I use to reduce stress when I'm stuck in traffic. I don't ever get tired of the endless, ever-changing parade of people going about their daily business.
I've never in my life driven in SF, so of course, YMMV.
posted by torticat at 6:23 PM on May 7, 2010
Yeah, NYC is not the benchmark of OMG crazy city driving. NYC driving is actually quite simple; it's all about the alternate merge.
"You have to be extremely agressive" is bullshit, and if your brother-in-law is driving that way, he's probably getting where he's going but pissing off a lot of other drivers. Extreme aggressiveness is entirely unnecessary; you just need to put on your signal and edge over when you have an opening. Most drivers are happy to accommodate, and once you get in the groove of things, it's really not stressful at all.
Also, I agree entirely with other posters who've said a mental (or paper) map of where you're going is far better than GPS. If you can't get into the lane you want to be in to make your turn, it shouldn't be a huge deal. You need to know the territory well enough to be able to go around the block, now and then, to adjust for the wrong turn/inability to turn/whatever. And every time you do this, you're expanding your knowledge of possible alternate routes.
One last point--what I love most about driving in NYC is the people-watching! This is what I use to reduce stress when I'm stuck in traffic. I don't ever get tired of the endless, ever-changing parade of people going about their daily business.
I've never in my life driven in SF, so of course, YMMV.
posted by torticat at 6:23 PM on May 7, 2010
You shouldn't be agressive, but you should be deliberate. For example, if you're at a four-way stop and no-one knows who should go, either start rolling like you mean it or flag someone to go. Taking charge of a situation, or making your intentions clear to everyone will break a stalemate. In most cases, the others will be thankful.
If you're merging on to the freeway, again, don't be agressive, but be deliberate. You have to get up to 70-75mph to be at the same speed as the traffic you're merging into, or it simply won't happen and you'll cause problems. Ironically, the sooner you get up to speed, the slower traffic will feel relative to you and the more relaxed you'll be.
Finally, slow down but not too much. Hurrying in the city is endangering yourself and others and doesn't get you anywhere sooner. Go slow enough that your mind is one step ahead of your car.
LA isn't that bad, really. I (a smallish-town Canadian) adapted without any trouble.
posted by klanawa at 8:23 PM on May 7, 2010
If you're merging on to the freeway, again, don't be agressive, but be deliberate. You have to get up to 70-75mph to be at the same speed as the traffic you're merging into, or it simply won't happen and you'll cause problems. Ironically, the sooner you get up to speed, the slower traffic will feel relative to you and the more relaxed you'll be.
Finally, slow down but not too much. Hurrying in the city is endangering yourself and others and doesn't get you anywhere sooner. Go slow enough that your mind is one step ahead of your car.
LA isn't that bad, really. I (a smallish-town Canadian) adapted without any trouble.
posted by klanawa at 8:23 PM on May 7, 2010
Yeah, as much as I like to say "It's best to yield and be chill about driving in SF," what muscat said, pretty much.
posted by blucevalo at 8:41 PM on May 7, 2010
posted by blucevalo at 8:41 PM on May 7, 2010
I focus on the fact that no one is grabbing my ass on the subway.
posted by kittenplease at 9:54 PM on May 7, 2010
posted by kittenplease at 9:54 PM on May 7, 2010
I'm utterly mystified by muscat's comment. Compared to other places where I've lived, I think drivers around here are remarkably courteous and sane.
There's some good advice from rtha, FishBike, and many more downthread. Take practice trips at quiet times, study the map ahead of time, leave space ahead of you, and don't let anyone bully you into moving faster than feels safe to you.
carsonb's point about communicating with signals and brake lights, and klanawa's distinction between "deliberate" and "aggressive" are two sides of the same coin. If you make it easy for other drivers to understand your intentions, most of them will try to accommodate you.
posted by tangerine at 10:48 PM on May 7, 2010
There's some good advice from rtha, FishBike, and many more downthread. Take practice trips at quiet times, study the map ahead of time, leave space ahead of you, and don't let anyone bully you into moving faster than feels safe to you.
carsonb's point about communicating with signals and brake lights, and klanawa's distinction between "deliberate" and "aggressive" are two sides of the same coin. If you make it easy for other drivers to understand your intentions, most of them will try to accommodate you.
posted by tangerine at 10:48 PM on May 7, 2010
Native angelena who gave up her car when she moved to NYC.
If you feel the need to shriek at the top of your lungs (with the windows rolled up) , go ahead!
;-)
posted by brujita at 10:51 PM on May 7, 2010
If you feel the need to shriek at the top of your lungs (with the windows rolled up) , go ahead!
;-)
posted by brujita at 10:51 PM on May 7, 2010
I have driven large trucks in L.A. NYC and S.F. for many years.
1st don't drive slow, go with the flow.
LA is a sad waste of freeway culture. When it works you can get anywhere in less than an hour, when it doesn't your day is shot. Read the signs, get over to the right early if that is the freeway you need to merge onto.
The best advice I received about driving in Manhattan was to look at the road like a river. Suddenly 3rd Ave was a snap.
San Francisco is all city driving all the time. Which means knowing how to get where your going in advance. It makes me crazy to be behind someone who is trying to figure out directions as they drive. Pull over, orient yourself and go again.
I see lots of bad driving but I only use my horn for what it is intended, alerting another driver of your presence.
Finally, I will if able get out of my truck and ask you exactly WTF you are thinking if because you disapproved of my driving your only response is to give me the finger. Be prepared.
posted by pianomover at 2:33 AM on May 8, 2010
1st don't drive slow, go with the flow.
LA is a sad waste of freeway culture. When it works you can get anywhere in less than an hour, when it doesn't your day is shot. Read the signs, get over to the right early if that is the freeway you need to merge onto.
The best advice I received about driving in Manhattan was to look at the road like a river. Suddenly 3rd Ave was a snap.
San Francisco is all city driving all the time. Which means knowing how to get where your going in advance. It makes me crazy to be behind someone who is trying to figure out directions as they drive. Pull over, orient yourself and go again.
I see lots of bad driving but I only use my horn for what it is intended, alerting another driver of your presence.
Finally, I will if able get out of my truck and ask you exactly WTF you are thinking if because you disapproved of my driving your only response is to give me the finger. Be prepared.
posted by pianomover at 2:33 AM on May 8, 2010
Best answer: In addition to all the other good be-prepared, have-a-map, relax advice, here are some things I learned:
- Have a full or at least full-ish tank of gas, so you won't have to stress about where the nearest gas station is.
- It's by far the easiest to face tough traffic on a full stomach and an empty bladder. If you're parched with thirst, woozy with hunger, or GOTTA GO RIGHT NOW, that is guaranteed to ruin your concentration/focus, and you don't want to take time out of your trip to find a restroom or place to snack. Have a bottle of water and an energy bar or quick snack in your car if necessary.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 7:09 AM on May 8, 2010
- Have a full or at least full-ish tank of gas, so you won't have to stress about where the nearest gas station is.
- It's by far the easiest to face tough traffic on a full stomach and an empty bladder. If you're parched with thirst, woozy with hunger, or GOTTA GO RIGHT NOW, that is guaranteed to ruin your concentration/focus, and you don't want to take time out of your trip to find a restroom or place to snack. Have a bottle of water and an energy bar or quick snack in your car if necessary.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 7:09 AM on May 8, 2010
I don't have anything super new to add, but I wanted to give you a lot of experience-earned sympathy and repeat the advice to just KEEP DOING IT and to BUY A GPS.
You'll continue to find things that throw you (oh hello double rotary I met today), but they become much more manageable when you don't have to worry about the fundamentals as much (where the hell am I going?!).
posted by whatzit at 10:00 AM on May 8, 2010
You'll continue to find things that throw you (oh hello double rotary I met today), but they become much more manageable when you don't have to worry about the fundamentals as much (where the hell am I going?!).
posted by whatzit at 10:00 AM on May 8, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by mzurer at 12:06 PM on May 7, 2010