I Want to Invent a New Word
December 27, 2009 1:40 PM Subscribe
OK Hive mind, here is something that has been inexplicably on my nerves for years. I want to come up with a new word, one that describes the act of completing a crossword puzzle by basically acing the thing, going through all the across clues in one shot, zip zap boom, and dropping the smoking remains of your pen on the table as you go and celebrate your inner dorkdom.
The only things that pop into my head are "Murphy", and "Kissmyfreakinaasswilshortz". Your suggestions, objections, and insults are appreciated. Anyway....if anyone knows a 13 letter word for...oh nevermind.
Bonus: Five bucks says we can get it into a dictionary in the next ten years.
Vitesse de mots
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:46 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:46 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
Crosswin.
posted by Spurious at 1:49 PM on December 27, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by Spurious at 1:49 PM on December 27, 2009 [4 favorites]
crosswizardry
posted by at the crossroads at 1:49 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by at the crossroads at 1:49 PM on December 27, 2009
Response by poster: with you inspiration, the phrase "horiziontal bop" comes to mind, but I know there is gold out there somewhere.
posted by timsteil at 2:08 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by timsteil at 2:08 PM on December 27, 2009
Hmm. In pool, we say "running the table." In baseball, "pitching a no-hitter." I think we need a phrase along those lines, not just a single word. Something like "ripping the grid." Has a nice ring to it.
posted by adamrice at 2:09 PM on December 27, 2009 [4 favorites]
posted by adamrice at 2:09 PM on December 27, 2009 [4 favorites]
Crucifried.
posted by a non e mouse at 2:13 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by a non e mouse at 2:13 PM on December 27, 2009
I used to spend a lot of time in a coffee house called The Last Exit (on Brooklyn, of course) near the University of Washington campus. One of the regulars was a pretty energetically weird dude called Ralph Ralph. One day I was sitting at the same table with him, while he just stared at the Thursday edition of the NYT crossword puzzle. After a while, he went to the next table, borrowed a pencil, and filled in the whole thing, left to right, and downward, like a job application.
So my term for that has always been "Ralph-Ralph."
posted by jimfl at 2:29 PM on December 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
So my term for that has always been "Ralph-Ralph."
posted by jimfl at 2:29 PM on December 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
Crucibingo.
posted by trip and a half at 2:40 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by trip and a half at 2:40 PM on December 27, 2009
Excruciated
Excrucigesis
Fill-in-thropic
or
triumph of the willshortz
posted by Cold Lurkey at 2:50 PM on December 27, 2009
Excrucigesis
Fill-in-thropic
or
triumph of the willshortz
posted by Cold Lurkey at 2:50 PM on December 27, 2009
Wordwang
Monocrucipletion
Wordwang has precedent.
posted by cmoj at 2:58 PM on December 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
Monocrucipletion
Wordwang has precedent.
posted by cmoj at 2:58 PM on December 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
The late Eugene T. Maleska was the greatest crossword puzzle maker who ever lived. So, in his honor, it should be referred to as "doing a Maleska."
posted by amyms at 3:01 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by amyms at 3:01 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
The late Eugene T. Maleska was the greatest crossword puzzle maker who ever lived. So, in his honor, it should be referred to as "doing a Maleska."
From what I understand this is a divisive issue. Merle Reagle, and Nancy Schuster, among others, really didn't like him, and The Shortz himself criticized his grid construction and clue writing.
If you're into 50's style crosswordese and apocrypha, then maybe so, but for my money it'd be called doing a Reagle.
posted by cmoj at 3:19 PM on December 27, 2009
ubershortzing
crossastic
crossasmic
gridmastering
king of the cluing
posted by bearwife at 3:31 PM on December 27, 2009
crossastic
crossasmic
gridmastering
king of the cluing
posted by bearwife at 3:31 PM on December 27, 2009
"filled my shortz"
But if you're doing this you really need to get some harder crossword puzzles. I personally greatly prefer acrostics and humbly recommend Frank Lewis and his half century of weekly puzzles from The Nation.
posted by ecurtz at 3:33 PM on December 27, 2009
But if you're doing this you really need to get some harder crossword puzzles. I personally greatly prefer acrostics and humbly recommend Frank Lewis and his half century of weekly puzzles from The Nation.
posted by ecurtz at 3:33 PM on December 27, 2009
Until someone else proves otherwise, it's to Hinman a puzzle.
posted by persona at 4:18 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by persona at 4:18 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
schlocksen.
I checked, it's not in the dictionary.
posted by krautland at 4:26 PM on December 27, 2009
I checked, it's not in the dictionary.
posted by krautland at 4:26 PM on December 27, 2009
Crossmate.
This is why I prefer diagramless and cryptic crosswords. Diagramless particularly - there's something zen about filling in all the little boxes in a pattern.
posted by goo at 4:36 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
This is why I prefer diagramless and cryptic crosswords. Diagramless particularly - there's something zen about filling in all the little boxes in a pattern.
posted by goo at 4:36 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
Cluegasm.
posted by wabbittwax at 5:09 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by wabbittwax at 5:09 PM on December 27, 2009
Impossible.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 5:12 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 5:12 PM on December 27, 2009
Another vote for "Maleska'd". This works for me.
(I feel no euphoria solving those puzzles from Monday through Thursday, because Shortz is such a hack)
posted by Zambrano at 6:25 PM on December 27, 2009
(I feel no euphoria solving those puzzles from Monday through Thursday, because Shortz is such a hack)
posted by Zambrano at 6:25 PM on December 27, 2009
jimfl, that's how I do Monday's, and sometimes Tuesday's. The no-writing rule makes it much more mentally challenging. I've never successfully done a Wednesday or later NYT puzzle that way, but those aren't so easy that they're no fun the normal way. I don't think I have EVER solved a puzzle in the way you describe - even for easy clues there are often two or more words that fit until you get some other stuff to verify.
For a puzzle that easy, I'd go for the phrase "just wasted ten minutes on that worthless" puzzle. Or I might call the act of solving it "data entry" and not "solving."
posted by ctmf at 6:44 PM on December 27, 2009
For a puzzle that easy, I'd go for the phrase "just wasted ten minutes on that worthless" puzzle. Or I might call the act of solving it "data entry" and not "solving."
posted by ctmf at 6:44 PM on December 27, 2009
crossavant
posted by bhdad at 7:02 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by bhdad at 7:02 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
My local government radio station used to run a competition each week to try to come up with words like this for situations of similar ilk. The presenter also wrote two books on the subject. Try googling "dag's dictionary" and you'll see heaps of this odd concoctions.
posted by taff at 7:08 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by taff at 7:08 PM on December 27, 2009
If you mean you "downed the list"-- perhaps you "Shortzed it out"?
posted by at the crossroads at 7:53 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by at the crossroads at 7:53 PM on December 27, 2009
Is it just me, or is "kissmyasswillshortz" not the perfect thing to say after bip-bop-booping all the words in a crossword?
posted by chicago2penn at 10:47 PM on December 27, 2009
posted by chicago2penn at 10:47 PM on December 27, 2009
Shortzirkited.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:07 AM on December 28, 2009
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:07 AM on December 28, 2009
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:45 PM on December 27, 2009 [1 favorite]