[NSFW] Need some good advice about a touchy subject.

September 27, 2009 8:07 PM

I agreed to do a paparazzi-style photo shoot for the wife of one of my best friends - I'll refer to her as Megan Fox from here on. :-) It was a kid's event with 100's of cameras but I was the only one allowed to get close up shots from straight on. The event went great and I told my friend I took 19 pictures and I would send them all over on Monday morning. They wanted to use one of the pictures for a big promo and get started right away....

.....so I didn't upload them to my PC until Sunday night. I did a quick glance at them to make sure everything was OK. Everything was fine until about picture 17.......and then I went back to double check every picture.......and it was the same in every shot. Megan's dress was completely see through from every picture I took from straight on. The three shots that I took from a slight angle were fine but everything straight-on was pretty revealing.

So how do I play this?

(I don't have time to modify the photos at this point)

1 - Tell them pictures didn't turn out once I uploaded them or my computer crashed. They won't believe this for a second becuase I'm pretty good with a camera and a computer and my friend would've been the first person I called if I had a problem.

2 - Send them and play dumb. What happens if they don't notice and this turns into an 8 foot poster?

3 - Tell them. (The "Nipple' and "Shrinkage" from Seinfeld come to mind)

posted by tickettrader to Human Relations (35 answers total)

Why wouldn't you pick option 3? I don't see any good reason to lie here.
posted by danb at 8:10 PM on September 27, 2009 [2 favorites]

Send the pictures. But tell them what what the issue is and offer to modify/photoshop/whatever the pictures asap.
posted by lucy.jakobs at 8:11 PM on September 27, 2009 [2 favorites]

Tell them. Ask them if they want you do to some photoshopping (it seems like a pretty simple fix to cover it?) or if they do, but tell them. It's not like it's your fault.
posted by brainmouse at 8:11 PM on September 27, 2009

(I mean, yeah, if it turns out like Seinfeld, that would be bad, but life doesn't often turn out like Seinfeld in my experience. Also, maybe you could just tell Megan.)
posted by danb at 8:11 PM on September 27, 2009

Sounds like you shot 19 headshots.

You may not have time to modify the photos (by this I am assuming you mean artfully PS out offending nipples) but cropping of several? surely *this* you have time for. Also, please do not play dumb: you have to tell her, if only so she will NEVER wear that outfit to a kid's event, again.
posted by squasha at 8:14 PM on September 27, 2009 [3 favorites]

I would explain the issue directly. The reason this seems wrong to you is because you appear, based on your use of the semi-colon ";" to have a small crush on your friend's wife. Just accept those feelings for what they are, which is harmless, and present it as a normal problem.
posted by Ironmouth at 8:14 PM on September 27, 2009

Tell her, and offer to photoshop them if she's willing to wait a little bit longer.
posted by kylej at 8:17 PM on September 27, 2009

Stuff like this happens allll the time. If it's not a see-through dress, its some unfortunate phallic-looking fruit basket behind somebody's head. This is what photo 'processing' is for. People knock Photoshopping when it's done deceptively or for nefarious purposes; the other 99% of the time...thank GOD.
posted by iamkimiam at 8:20 PM on September 27, 2009 [3 favorites]

I don't get the problem with telling the truth.
posted by serazin at 8:36 PM on September 27, 2009 [2 favorites]

Yeah...truth is the way to go here.
posted by dejah420 at 8:40 PM on September 27, 2009

For what it's worth, that was a colon ':', not a semicolon.

Send them the pictures, but do tell them the truth and offer to photoshop them. No big deal.
posted by dunkadunc at 8:41 PM on September 27, 2009

Was this a free thing, or are you being paid to do it? If it was free, then I wouldn't worry too much here. If there was a business agreement and you were paid, it is up to you to produce- photoshop them and send them both copies and tell them what happened.
posted by TheBones at 8:47 PM on September 27, 2009

I'm really confused as to a) what a "paparazzi-style photo shoot" actually entails (is this woman actually famous?); b) why and how you were able to be the only one to get straight-on(?) shots of her; and c) why there is such a rush that you can't Photoshop out the offending bits? Can you clarify?
posted by pised at 8:49 PM on September 27, 2009

Response by poster: Thanks for the advice. I was leaning towards #3....I just hope it doesn't make our friendship weird for awhile....
posted by tickettrader at 8:57 PM on September 27, 2009

Are you worried about your friend realizing that you've seen sexy bits of his foxy wife? That's the only motivation I can imagine to not just tell the truth here, and it's a pretty bad one.
posted by you're a kitty! at 8:58 PM on September 27, 2009

I told my friend I took 19 pictures and I would send them all over on Monday morning.... I don't have time to modify the photos at this point.

Unless you're in Europe, yes you do. It's still Sunday in most of America.

De-nippling a photo is a few minutes work. 19 pics x a few minutes each = a couple of hours.
posted by rokusan at 8:58 PM on September 27, 2009

I would explain the issue directly. The reason this seems wrong to you is because you appear, based on your use of the semi-colon ";" to have a small crush on your friend's wife. Just accept those feelings for what they are, which is harmless, and present it as a normal problem.

Uh... what? This does not make any sense. Are you mistaking the smiley face for a winky face? (And why would a winky face mean "zomg i have a secret crush" and not "get the joke? she is megan fox like i'm a paparazzo!"?)

OP, go with option 3. It's not a big deal, this happens all the time in actual red carpet photos.
posted by palomar at 9:01 PM on September 27, 2009

Response by poster: TheBones - no, I was asked last minute, said 'NO' and then agreed about 2 minutes before it started.

Pised - a) she isn't really famous but the people she was with are VERY famous. b) nobody else was allowed within 15 feet. c) i don't have the time to Photoshop at this point.
posted by tickettrader at 9:02 PM on September 27, 2009

Pised - a) she isn't really famous but the people she was with are VERY famous. b) nobody else was allowed within 15 feet. c) i don't have the time to Photoshop at this point.

No offense, but its been an hour since you asked this question, you probably could have denippled at least half of the shots by now. If you're unsure how, I'm sure someone in this thread could help you out.
posted by kylej at 9:11 PM on September 27, 2009

Isn't this why Photoshop was invented? Pick a few of the best shots and de-detail the dress, it's not a big deal to remove this sort of thing from a photo if you have the right software.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 9:13 PM on September 27, 2009

i too fail to see why this is a problem or would pose any sort of awkwardness or embarrassment. it isn't your fault she wore a see-through dress; nor could anyone really predict it would result in being see-through in pictures. it is what it is. the way you are acting is what's gonna make it weird.

also, seconding rokusan. this should be a snap to fix in photoshop.
posted by violetk at 9:13 PM on September 27, 2009

Yeah, maybe someone could help you? It shouldn't take all that long to fix the shots in photoshop. The only issue would be that, depending on how you fix it, someone who knows how to use photoshop could likely unfix it.
posted by Justinian at 9:14 PM on September 27, 2009

(I don't have time to modify the photos at this point)

ummmm....yes you do, you could have edited most of them in the amount of time that it took to post and babysit this thread.
posted by The Light Fantastic at 9:14 PM on September 27, 2009

Do you not have photoshop? I'm sure someone could recommend a free piece of software that could do this. You might even be able to do this in picasa using the retouch feature.
posted by kylej at 9:17 PM on September 27, 2009

I'm with everyone else: I think you're being too squeamish about this. Like others have said, you can't take the blame for the dress appearing transparent when photographed. I'd really make the effort to edit the photos, but if "their" publicity people have a designer on staff, or if you really just don't know how to photoshop well, just send the photos with a note that says something like:

"Dear Megan,
Here are the photos I promised you from the event. Unfortunately, as you will notice, the photos taken straight-on are rather revealing. I have attached them regardless, in case you will be able to edit them to your satisfaction. Thank you for this opportunity blah blah blah...

tickettrader"


And in the future, I would also take more than 19 photos, but that's just me.
posted by runningwithscissors at 9:37 PM on September 27, 2009 [4 favorites]

Just send the pictures. I think the people who think you could just photo shop these in an hour are out of their minds. Maybe if it was just low-resolution pictures for the web it would be one thing, but for full resolution images, and doing it in a way that wouldn't be noticeable at all isn't that realistic. Plus, it takes a lot of skill to do it in a way that dosn't look fake or obvious. Not everyone can do it. It certainly isn't the case that if you have photoshop you can just "do it"

Just Google "photoshop disasters" (coincidentally the first result links to a blog with a picture of Megan Fox in the most recent entry)
posted by delmoi at 9:44 PM on September 27, 2009 [3 favorites]

Whatever you do, make copies of the photos and put them somewhere else before you start manipulating (denippulating?) them.
posted by iamkimiam at 9:53 PM on September 27, 2009

I think people are being a little harsh to the OP here - you don't know his life or what's going on. Maybe he's out and posting from his smart phone/pda/laptop, maybe he's super busy and the 5 minutes or so that its taken him to skim the thread and post a couple of quick replies is genuinely all the time he's had. I think its really rather rude for so many of you to suggest that he's basically lying about how much free time he has to work on these photos. He also said that the dress was completely see-through, so I'm guess its more than just retouching a couple of perky nipples.

OP. Just be honest, your camera isn't magical, it didn't cause the dress to be see-through. If it was from the flash, there was still a flash of see-through dress for all to see when you took each shot - I don't see why it should make your friendship weird - unless she wasn't wearing any undies and you can see what shape her pubic hair is shaved into ;) To me it sounds like the sort of thing where she'll be mildly embarrassed but you can all laugh about it later - if you didn't notice until picture 17, it can't be that bad.

If the pics are going to be used in a promo, they're probably going to be professionally retouched anyway but I'd just send a note with it pointing out the dress situation and offering to retouch any pictures that they want to use when they've had a look at them and chosen the ones they want.
posted by missmagenta at 10:35 PM on September 27, 2009 [9 favorites]

Agree with everyone else. I'd add to use caution in sending anything electronically - verify that only trusted persons will have access at whatever destination they land at.
posted by nanojath at 10:54 PM on September 27, 2009 [1 favorite]

I dunno why it would be weird. Just contact her directly (she can tell her husband if he asks) and say, "there's a problem with these photos, your dress is transparent because of the flash... what do you want to do?" I guess, like others, I don't know why you think this would be deal-breaking-ly awkward to address. It's "hehe, oops"-level embarrassment at best.

But I won't make assumptions here.. if you really can't just tell her you can see her nipples and you really don't have any means to manipulate them, you can fall back on the time-tested method of being discreet lying. Some options: Your camera broke; your HD failed and you lost everything.
posted by cj_ at 1:06 AM on September 28, 2009

Also agree on 3. Just send all the photos and mention that a few are a bit 'revealing'. it happens....

Doen't seem that big a deal. its not like you are a perv becuase the dress happened to appear see-through
posted by mary8nne at 3:03 AM on September 28, 2009

To be blunt: nipples are easy to clone stamp out, if that's what the deal is.* If you're pressed for time, have them pick one and work on it. Heavy-handed cropping on the rest. And yeah, not your fault about the dress. Be professional about it--which means don't feel the need to be coy, embarrassed, or "oooh naked lady": you report what came out on the images. And you don't need to say "nipples" or "why the hell didn't you wear a bra sexy mama" if that's the stumbling block: just say, "some fabrics are very see-through on exposure [heh] and this was a concern on most of the images; I didn't know until after the shoot. See the attached example--would you like me to crop, or work on some retouching once I have more time?"

*I'd ask you to post an example so we could assess the amount of retouch necessary, but that seems REALLY inappropriate to this situation.
posted by availablelight at 4:46 AM on September 28, 2009

At the risk of sounding dumb, are you 100% sure that she doesn't want the dress to come across as a bit see-through?

I mean, *you* described the shoot as paparazzi, and surrounded by tons of famous people it's a helluva way to stand out.

I apologise for impugning the motives of your friend's wife, but it seems to me that it's a possibility at least.

And photoshopping out the see through bits before sending them over may be the worst idea: if she has an inkling that the dress is see through she might actually be looking for evidence of it that you've well-intentionedly removed.
posted by MuffinMan at 8:19 AM on September 28, 2009

I love digital photography how digital photography, instead of having to wait around for pictures to be developed in some magic chemicals that no one understood, photographers are now expected to spend hours in photoshop making sure every picture is perfect and if they don't they are obviously lazy or stupid.

If you can't easily touch up the pictures, just choose option 3. You aren't being paid, and it isn't your fault that the pictures are more revealing than they should be.
posted by afu at 9:16 AM on September 28, 2009 [2 favorites]

I second posting 1 or 2 of your pics, but, "yes," highly inappropriate... though you could blur out the face so we wouldn't know.

As far as photoshopping and cropping, if it's for anything less than the web, and true celeb paparazzi style photos, clone stamping WON'T WORK! As said above, anything less than painstaking work will look foolish.

If he could, he'd be a graphic designer/touch up artist for a magazine and he wouldn't be asking this question on metafilter.

You said it was free and last minute- they have to deal with the results and if they are anything less than ecstatic, maybe they really aren't great friends after all.

I hate to mix business with friendship.

Why the rush on the deadline- it sounds like this was a deadline you set for yourself? If so, it was a free gig, tell them you were too ambitious and make it right if it is going in a portfolio.
posted by TheBones at 9:27 AM on September 28, 2009 [1 favorite]