Returning to University as a Mature Student

September 9, 2009 9:44 AM

I'm making a career change to be a psychotherapist/clinical psychologist. As a result of this I'm returning to university this month in my early thirties to study an undergraduate degree. In order to make a success of this I want all aspects of it to go well including the social aspects. I have a lot of common sense and am somewhat introverted though not painfully. I'd really welcome any tips on getting the most out of this experience, particularly in terms of easing meeting new people and forming new friendships. I'm UK based.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (7 answers total)

My husband went back to school as an undergrad at 33 and found quite a few people in his classes who were in their mid- to late-20s, at least. (We're in the US, national capitol area.) He made friends with quite a few by getting together to study for exams. Study groups became lunch buddies, and so on. The college environment is pretty conducive to forming friendships, probably more so than the "real world." Good luck -- and congratulations!
posted by Ladybug Parade at 10:05 AM on September 9, 2009

Personal experience - it's easy to find other mature students, as they're always in the first two rows of the lecture theatre! Say hello, as most other mature students will be in the position of not living in halls, not knowing anyone come the first lecture and wanting someone to talk to.

Join societies. I hate noisy socialising, so I'm very active in a number of student societies, which are the easiest non-pub way of meeting people.

Don't feel you have to keep up with the drinking and partying of your younger colleagues. I made it very clear after a terrible, terrible hangover that my liver was now too old for that sort of thing, and people were very accepting of my 'infirmities'.

I'm about to go into third year as a mature student, again as a career change, and I haven't regretted a moment (apart from the moments when I open my bank statements). Best of luck!
posted by Coobeastie at 10:23 AM on September 9, 2009

Many universities will have a mature student society, some will probably be better than others but worth a look.

Many depts will run a 'welcome'/get to know session at the beggining of term, a good place to break the ice on meeting the other mature students. Be sure to go along.

Numbers of mature students will vary considerably but in a new class many will be happy just to see never mind speak to new people who aren't 18. They will mostly welcome a chat.
posted by biffa at 10:34 AM on September 9, 2009

People interested in becoming a therapist are, in my experience, easy to meet and talk to.
posted by Obscure Reference at 10:38 AM on September 9, 2009

In my anecdotal experiences at my own undergrad/grad programs in a major metropolitan area of the US, there are a LOT of non-traditional-age students studying psychology in particular. There are also a lot of traditional-age students who prefer the company and conversation of adults.
posted by so_gracefully at 11:50 AM on September 9, 2009

I went to two universities, one in which I had a lot of friends the other in which I knew only a handful of people. Advantages and disadvantages to both, but I gotta admit, I studied a lot harder and had much more academic success when I had only a few friends.
posted by telstar at 1:01 PM on September 9, 2009

As an "older student" with a degree in the psych field, I say congratulations!

JME older students often have the advantage - they are in college because they want to be not because they're expected to be and Mommy is paying. And again, IME, there are many other non-traditional students out there: they are now a majority of college students.

As Obscure Reference notes, psych students are generally a gregarious, easy-to-talk-to lot. I have made some (hopefully) lifelong friends from my program. If your program has a LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook or other social networking group, join it. Make an effort to talk to your classmates - even a "hi, how are you, how 'bout them [local sports team]" is appreciated.

Get to know your professors, too. Again IME, professors really appreciate students who show up in their offices and talk about the program and don't just show up to beg for grade increases two weeks before finals are due.

Don't feel you have to party. The younger students will understand, and (again IME) will respect you more if you know your limits rather than inviting scorn as the Jon Gosselin-ish thirtysomething bar-hopper/clubber/making a fool of hirself trying to be young again.

Again, good luck, and welcome to the wonderful world of psychology! MeMail me if you want some more tips/encouragement.
posted by Rosie M. Banks at 8:22 AM on September 10, 2009