If you stole "Steal This Album" or "Steal This Book", would you get in trouble?

December 12, 2004 11:43 AM

If you got caught stealing Abbie Hoffman's "Steal this Book," or System of a Down's "Steal this Album," or any other item that says "Steal This" somewhere on it, and charges were pressed against you, would you have any legal basis for saying that you aren't responsible because the merchandise told you to steal it?
posted by BuddhaInABucket to Law & Government (17 answers total)

Uh, and if the book instructed you kill, would that be a legal basis? No, no it would not be.
posted by geoff. at 11:56 AM on December 12, 2004

Kill Bill.
posted by sad_otter at 11:59 AM on December 12, 2004

No.
posted by xammerboy at 12:25 PM on December 12, 2004

It said "Steal this book", not "Legally acquire this book right now for free". You stole it, like the cover said. So, that's stealing. Stealing is illegal, ergo, you get to meet the judge with the other scumbags on monday morning.
posted by shepd at 12:32 PM on December 12, 2004

You'd need to use the Chewbacca defense.
posted by Krrrlson at 12:48 PM on December 12, 2004

You forgot "Steal This File-Sharing Book".
posted by 445supermag at 12:56 PM on December 12, 2004

no, but if you have the monopoly "get out of jail free" card you won't have to serve the sentence.
posted by andrew cooke at 1:35 PM on December 12, 2004

No, you'd just look really stupid.
posted by neckro23 at 1:37 PM on December 12, 2004

In fact, there would probably be an article about you in the paper the next day, with your name in it, making sure that you looked really stupid.
posted by bingo at 2:16 PM on December 12, 2004

If you get caught stealing a copy of Big Black's "Songs About Fucking", you're pretty much fucked.
posted by Smart Dalek at 3:16 PM on December 12, 2004

Okay, so the book/movie/whatever title isn't a defense... but could it be incriminating? That is to say, could the publishers or vendors of the item in question be indicted right along with poor, hapless BuddhaInABucket for instructing or inciting him to commit the offense?
posted by Clay201 at 3:25 PM on December 12, 2004

The three part test for incitement is that the speech be directed/intended to incite or produce imminent lawless action and is likely to produce such imminent action. You essentially have to be starting a riot to be liable in that context. This is hardly equivalent.

So, no.
posted by amber_dale at 3:37 PM on December 12, 2004

Response by poster: The unspoken second part of my question was what Clay201 said- and like the rest of my rhetorical askme questions that had nothing to actually do with me, I'd like to iterate that I haven't actually stolen anything, nor do I intend to.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 4:13 PM on December 12, 2004

Quite frankly, your rhetorical question is kind of stupid (and not rhetorical). It doesn't really explore some deeper idea or meaning that you could at least hide behind. Discussing it is pointless. Stealing is illegal. But it is typical for someone these days (in the U.S. at least) to be looking for someone else to blame for their own stupidity (hypothetically or not).

Now, if it said, "Pee-pee on this book"...
posted by Witty at 4:31 PM on December 12, 2004

I should probably keep my mouth shut as I have no proof but unless my memory is completely fucked, this happened. I can't remember when but it was in the last 15 years or so. And yes, the person got off. Where did I read this? I'm not certain, but I believe it was in NOW Magazine and that the case was Canadian. I remember reading it because it was the first time I'd ever heard of the book.
posted by dobbs at 4:40 PM on December 12, 2004

Just Do It.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:05 PM on December 12, 2004

I think shepd explained it well. Hopefully the judges would be capable of making that distinction as well.
posted by mdn at 6:14 PM on December 12, 2004