Let's say I travel with my coworkers - let's call them Anne, Bryan, and Casey - to an offsite event near our office. How should I handle the awkward situation that sometimes plays out? Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
A friend is a senior engineer at a small company—the only woman in a senior technical role at the company—who, after years of working for them (she was literally the first hire) is hitting a lot of resistance from the men above, most of it the typical "Women in the workplace" b.s. She strongly believes in the work and the company, but is getting regularly undermined. I'd love to find some resources (books, blogs, forums, strategies, etc.) to help her deal effectively with the people making the workplace ridiculous. [more inside]
I have a friend who is having a really tough time dealing with a difficult boss. [more inside]
I'm scheduled to be on a panel about lack of women in senior roles within my industry. So I'm looking for pointers to articles, short podcasts, studies, puff pieces, reports, and just general interesting point of views on encouraging women into industries (from both women AND women). [more inside]
I've gotten out of a ten-year plus job that was essentially (if not in reality) a protected workplace and not too difficult and now am going to tackle (have been hired for) a new, higher-up and better paying one (before the first job I was very sick for quite a while and therefore couldn't work at all so missed out on the opportunity to learn about much about the Big Girl/Big Boy details of life in the workplace). Because of this, I feel like I really don't know what I should be doing (besides the work I mean). What is your very best advice for being/appearing professional on the job? I know about not gossiping and being on time.
Frequently being excluded from peer group meetings and discussions at work. How do I tell my executives this is not acceptable? [more inside]
I need advice and coping strategies to deal with coworkers who are rude to clients. [more inside]
Metafilter feminists help me out! I an trying to compile a list of things that only ambitious women get to hear as they fight their way into management. Things like "you sound too abrasive". But also getting ignored in a specific way. I would like these to be things someone has actually said to you or someone you know. Can you help me?
I have a yearly performance review coming up. I need help addressing worsening communication issues. [more inside]
One of my coworkers said something that feels BEYOND inappropriate, and I don't know what to do about it. Difficulty level: racism. In the office. With lots of Southern cultural baggage. Also, WTF. [more inside]
I've been doing some work with an executive function coach who has suggested that our process would benefit if she has some contact with key people that I work with. I'd like to think through the risks that that might entail, in order to decide if it's a good idea and worth it on balance. [more inside]
I am in the second year of my first big-girl job working with and leading groups of people. I am looking for advice/suggestions for ways to a) learn how to confidently negotiate a confrontation without feeling physically ill and b) recognize my personal avoidance tactics for these situations and assess whether this is me taking the "easy way out" or if the actions I am taking really are correct. This is specifically for business situations. Are there classes out there? Is there a book I should read? [more inside]
I need to start to shift the work culture among a couple members of our support staff. Snowflakes and unicorns inside. [more inside]
I have been working for an agency for 8 years in an upper-management position. My new-ish supervisor hates me and is creating a negative/hostile work environment. My doctor thinks I qualify for intermittent FMLA due to workplace related stress. What are people's experiences with using intermittent FMLA? Is it only going to make things worse? [more inside]
Am I an asshole for saying, acting, and making plans as if I will be there forever while working on my strategy to leave in the next month? [more inside]
I'm married, with a kid. I work in the service industry. I have a powerful, consuming crush on my boss, who is also in a serious relationship. I used to be his boss, and we have a very friendly and candid relationship. I really, really need to not feel this way anymore. If I try to back off and go professional, he always asks what is wrong and it sucks me right back in. How do I make it stop?
Very soon, I will be in a position where I will need to help lead a major change in the workplace, and one where many of the people I work with will be unhappy. How do I do this? [more inside]
I work at a small non-profit academic organization (30 staff). We're currently in a period of "organizational restructuring," spurred by the (coincidentally timed) resignation of several of our key leaders, and I've been asked to be part of the team that helps decide what this new structure should look like. Help. [more inside]
I just started a new job as a researcher. They hired a few people around the same time as me and we all have start dates around now-ish. I've been there a week. There is a new guy starting in my department in a more senior position than me, but not supervising me, on Monday. I just got his name today and looked him up, and... there are some things about him that a little bit of digging uncovered that are sketchy. (It's definitely him, please give me the benefit of the doubt here.) His job is not likely to be impacted by these revelations about his recent past, but if it were to get out that his history includes these things, it could endanger my company's reputation if a competitor or journalist found out. Nothing he did is illegal. [more inside]
In my day to day life, I often have to deal with people who, instead of asking questions, make assumptions aloud at you about what you're going to be doing despite the fact that these assumptions may not be accurate. A lot of the time these techniques are used along with someone pretending to be so hopelessly helpless that they could not possibly take care of their own workplace problems. Basically, it's a technique used by weasels. For example: "I know you're going to be very helpful during this process because..." or "I don't know x from z so it's a good thing you are here to handle that part" They will also make assumptions about what you would and would not do. "I know you wouldn't want x or z to happen because..." These things are usually in no way true. In fact, the weasel in question often knows they're not true, they're just testing boundaries. So my question is generally, how does one push back against these behaviors without being rude, jarring and literal? Especially if you're dealing with a weasel -- they're better at this than you. I tend to shut down in the presence of weaselry, giving them very little the work with, but this doesn't seem like the best solution.
How can you tell when it's you or the job? [more inside]
My employer seems to be pushing me toward filing an EEOC complaint or resigning my job. What do I do? [more inside]
I started a new job in a completely new place and I want to be the best colleague I can be. What are some tips or commonsense things for me to remember and internalize about appropriate workplace behavior? [more inside]
I have started a new job at a established internet startup. Decorating your cube is a big deal around here. I need ideas for something cool. As I am a project manager, I would like to have something somewhat professional but also creative / aesthetic pleasing. Any ideas for cube flair? Any cool cubes you have seen that aren't over the top? Help me have the coolest cube ever!!!
I get data review and entry work done extremely fast with no discernible lack of quality. But, I also have a persistent feeling I'm doing things wrong or missing important details. How to fix this? [more inside]
How do I get a job as a corporate drone? [more inside]
Please help me wrest an amazing company from the clutches of one overgrown frat boy. [more inside]
What the hell is in my co-worker's mind? [more inside]
I hate my job and yet I can't legally leave, I don't think. Help me cope. [more inside]
Supervisor revealed secret pregnancy: any recourse? [more inside]
Difficult Boss Filter: How do I deal with my smack-talkin', super negative boss? [more inside]
Any good books out there on handling employee gossip, from a managerial perspective? [more inside]
I am a 22-year-old female who has just been informed that I have received a prestigious arts and culture internship in my Western U.S. city's government. This is my first real job, and I'm perplexed about what clothes to buy for a professional, yet comfortable summer wardrobe. [more inside]
A consultant who works closely with my department hates me. He's not going anywhere. How do I deal? [more inside]
I'm having a hard time sussing out whether a recent job candidate's informality (and non-adherence to gender norms) should be a major warning sign, eye-rollingly insignificant, or somewhere in between. [more inside]
My boss recently hired a former coworker for an open position in the department. This person will be working on many of the same tasks and projects as I am. He was both well-liked and skilled at the job when he left years ago, and I am afraid that he's going to come back and completely outshine me. How can I handle this situation professionally? [more inside]
Get off my lawn filter: What's the matter with these kids today? Really. (More after the jump). [more inside]
How common is physical abuse in the workplace? I had a boss who hit me a few years ago and I was talking to a friend recently and she said the same thing happened to her. Naturally, this made me curious as I thought physical abuse was relatively rare in the workplace compared to emotional.
Help me deal with transitioning from peer to authority figure. [more inside]
I'm a legal secretary at a Big Law Firm, and was previously assigned to two attorneys, Sam and Sarah. Because my workload was light, I accommodated each of Sarah's requests as best I could (Sam is every secretary's dream, and requests very little assistance). To my own fault, I spoiled Sarah, enabled her laziness, and now find myself stuck in a hole. I've been assigned a new attorney, Scott, who is both new to the firm and has a large docket. My workload has increased substantially - Sarah is used to getting her way, and Scott has deadlines coming out of his ears. I need advice on how to get a couple points across to Sarah and Scott. [more inside]
What are the key motivators that make people do their jobs? [more inside]
How do I tell my bosses that my coworkers are making it impossible to do my work because they are essentially goofing off 50% of the time without getting my coworkers in trouble? [more inside]
How do you deal with sexism in your workplace? [more inside]
Many workplaces ban social networking sites such as Facebook, YouTube, Twitter and so on. What are some of the reasons workplaces should allow (and even encourage) staff to use social networking sites? [more inside]
What are the best strategies for my current work situation? Question relates to disability, unemployment, and illegal activities (not mine). [more inside]
You-are-not-my-lawyer-filter: Minimum wage went up, and my paycheck didn't. Why not? [more inside]
Looking for info regarding employer disability laws relating to alcohol rehab in state of Conneticut. [more inside]
I need challenge and pressure to stay motivated... how do I stay motivated during times when those things aren't present?
I have a very hard time keeping motivated and being productive when work is slow. If I am not either feeling pressure or being challenged, I get sloppy and underperform. Is this normal? What can I do to fix it? [more inside]
Is this worth finding a new job over? [more inside]
I'm part of a group of about 70 people (at a company of tens of thousands) spread across the country and we're having a hard time communicating, especially casually. Anyone have any suggestions? [more inside]
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