Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with working

Winnipeg....here I come! Or may be not!

xm — Sun, 14 Apr 2013 18:45:20 -0800

Tell me about living in Winnipeg, Canada. All the good, the bad and the ugly. Low salary and in scientific research and a foreign worker....what did you like and hate about it? For someone who loves being out in the sun, walking/hiking outside a couple of times a week, is this going to be hard to navigate, if its an option at all that is? Or am I going to freeze inside with boredom in my apartment for most of the year and get seasonal depression and what not? I have never lived anywhere where it snows but I love winter. However, I am not sure if I am considering the Tundra here... It is especially important for me right now, at the point where I am in life, to be able to go out and about and walk, as silly as that may sound. Thanks in advance!

Help me not outstay my welcome.

doiheartwentyone — Mon, 11 Mar 2013 10:31:13 -0800

Where in London or surrounding areas can I hole up with my laptop and work, without having to get drunk or wired, or incur the ire of the management? I work from home much of the time, but sometimes I find I need a change of scenery to stay focused. I'd like to be able to spend the occasional half day in a different location. Pubs and cafes seem the obvious choice, but as came up in this question many places (understandably) discourage campers.

So hive mind, where can I go? Food or drink places aren't completely out as long as they wouldn't mind me spending four hours there, and the consumption of four hours' worth of product wouldn't have significant...other effects....

Indoors is pretty much a requirement (been snowing today) and wifi would be good but it doesn't have to be free. I've googled desk space rental, but it seems to be always on a weekly/monthly contract basis, I'd like places I can just turn up, since I'd ideally be using a different one each time.

Although central London is the obvious place to look, I'd also be interested in particularly amenable places in commuterland. Working in Brighton for a day would be sweet.

Job as Online test-scorer?

PussKillian — Sun, 17 Feb 2013 09:31:55 -0800

My husband is considering doing online test-scoring as a side job. What do we need to know? My husband is currently unemployed (receives disability) and would like to find work but is constrained by his illness. (A nice, quiet mailroom job...harder to find than you would think!) He has a BA and has in the past taught one class at a trade school for his profession. Finding a job he could do from home where he could earn some extra money would be great for him in a lot of ways. Would online test-scoring be something he is qualified for, or is the pool of scorers usually limited to people with more in-depth teaching experience? Is ETS a legitimate company or are there better ones out there?

Contract programming position questions.

Anonymous — Tue, 12 Feb 2013 09:06:36 -0800

I interviewed for a remote programming gig recently, and they requested a trial contract before making a final offer. I'd be hired as a long-term remote contractor (year+, 100% telecommuting), not an employee. I have some questions: 1. What multiplier should I apply to my current salary, at a job with great benefits, to calculate the break even point? The contractor position would not include any benefits, and I'm in good ol' USA, so I will need to purchase healthcare. My thought is current salary +30% to +40% would be a break even point considering the length and stability of the contract. If it were less than a year minimum, I would need to use a higher multiple. Is that about right?

2. The short term trial is at the same hourly wage as the long-term position, which is less than I charge for shorter projects. This short trial is hugely in their benefit, as it should greatly reduce the odds of my being a poor fit for the company. I get a somewhat similar benefit, but I think my risks are much lower. If we decide we're not right for each other, they've dodged a bullet for a pittance while I've lost a week of time for pretty poor compensation. It's not a huge imbalance, but it's there.

I am not concerned at all about the money, but I do not want to be a passive participant who sends signals that I can be taken advantage of. I'm more worried about positioning myself than anything else. I don't have sufficient experience to read the smoke signals and tell how "So, my usual hourly rate is $65 per hour. Could you bump up the short-term rate to match?" might go over. I am very interested in the position and do not want to poison the well.

Also, is this sort of short-term contract request unusual? It seems reasonable to me, but I have no experience with it.

3. What warning signs should I be looking for in the company? What danger signals should scream out, "Get away from these guys!"?

1 SSD & 2 HDD (One of the HDD isnt showing any more). Need help!

spinko — Sat, 17 Nov 2012 07:39:57 -0800

I've just upgraded my rig with a 256gb SSD card for the main C:. This is primary used for the OS, apps and my work files. I previously had 2 HDD's one for OS and the other for backups. However I've got the SSD working with a new copy of Windows 8 Pro. Only one of my HDD drives is showing. I've copied over the work files but cannot access my other drive. I swapped the sata cable to the other drive and violla, it shows. But the other drive doesnt show.

I've checked the leads and swapped them around, so no fault with the lead itself. Even swapping the DVD writer Sata lead works.

I remember in the good ole' days you had to put a bracket to show if its a master or slave. Is this the case? or could it be a bios setting?

So just to clarify:

· Both HDD's do work
· All the Sata leads work
· Checked Admin tools (drives only showing is the DVD, SSD and one of the HDD)

Its baffled me so far why it isnt showing both HDD's.

Where's the Gift of Fear for the workplace?

ziggly — Thu, 25 Oct 2012 12:59:31 -0800

What did you first notice about your supervisor, coworkers, subordinates, or office environment when you were about to take a job that turned out to be a negative experience? I believe I have suppressed some gut-level reactions when unwisely accepting employment offers. What were some things you noticed when you were about to make a similarly poor decision?

Some examples:

-Mistaking desperation for enthusiasm
-Thinking I'd fit into a non-diverse workforce (i.e. single-sex, everyone else is significantly older, etc.)
-Overlooking some minor boundary invasion (i.e., the hiring manager called references before being provided a list or given explicit permission)

What did you notice? Has that guided you when you accepted jobs in the future?

Ben Franklin's weekends

ignignokt — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 07:12:40 -0800

Did Benjamin Franklin have a weekend schedule? Looking at his daily schedule makes me curious as to whether he adhered to it seven days a week or if he did something different on Saturday and Sunday. I've read that weekends weren't established for the working class in the US until the labor movement pushed for it in the 1800s, so I'm not sure if any Americans "practiced" weekends before then.

NYC: Where can an out-of-towner work for the day? Willing to pay.

jander03 — Thu, 04 Oct 2012 00:09:04 -0800

NYC: Where can an out-of-towner work for the day? I'm visiting NYC and need a place to connect to the internet and make phone calls for about 6 hours. Where can that be done in NYC? I'd be willing to pay a small fee (or buy a few cups of coffee).

Podcasts to ignore

The Dutchman — Tue, 11 Sep 2012 08:51:01 -0800

What are some good podcasts I can half pay attention to while working? While I love This American Life, The Moth, Story Collider and Radiolab, if I listen to them (or anything else with a storyline) while working, I lose the thread and can't concentrate on either the work or the podcast. A few that do work well for me: Savage Love, Jordan Jesse Go, WTF (to a lesser extent). Any suggestions?

To retail or not to retail?

Anonymous — Tue, 11 Sep 2012 08:13:35 -0800

Retail me, or retail me not? I'm about ready to throw in the towel for my newish retail job.

I'm working for one of the world's biggest and most successful technological companies at one of their retail stores, as a general salesperson. It's been an amazing experience so far, in terms of personal growth and gained experience.

However, I'm ready to throw in the towel and just continue to job-search or go back to school. Think I'm crazy or weird? I'm sure you're not the only one. I'm going to explain why, and a bit of a backstory.

I'm deaf, and was struggling to find a job for about 1 1/2 years, so when I got the offer for this retail job earlier this spring, it was definitely a sweet offer and one that I jumped at immediately. The job has benefits, the pay is relatively good (for retail, anyway), and this company is pretty accommodating towards Deaf (and other disabled folks). I like and get along well with a majority of my co-workers. I love a majority of my customers; it's a perfect combination of working with people and with technology, two things I love. Pretty much everyday, I have awesome customers who make me laugh, or just really smile. Me making a difference does help. That's the good part.

Now, the bad part. It's such a chaotic environment, I barely have time to think or do productive tasks. Policies change constantly, product cycles keep refreshing, managers are hard to reach, and can be very cold and standoffish. I often feel left out in the flow of communication, especially due to the communication barrier that is present due to my Deafness. "You just said this company was pretty accommodating towards Deaf and other disabled people?" you may ask. True, at store or market meetings, and I do get equipment to communicate with customers. But, I feel left out from my co-workers (not their fault), and despite store-wide emails I send, which get ignored mostly (we're kind of into the 'team communication' effort at my store), people still speak to me. I understand it's human nature, and habit, but I can't read lips. I'm tired of being the 'bad guy' and having to repeat it. I'm tired of managers seeming to come across as cold or focusing on small mistakes instead of on the big picture and making a big deal out of small mistakes I've made. I'm tired of the general pretentious feel I'm getting from the company in general. I'm tired of walking on eggshells and having to deal with a chaotic, constantly changing environment. I'm tired of working so hard to impress management and have my efforts be ignored, with a few exceptions. I don't like the lack of a career ladder. I don't like my schedule being so inconsistent. I feel myself becoming worn down by customers continuing to ask me question after question. I don't like the lack of flexibility in scheduling. I can go on and on, but that's the gist of it.

Then, today, me and a manager had a small disagreement over something silly. I was told by one manager that I was welcome to charge my phone in the office. When I went in the manager's office to charge my phone, I was told by a manager not to do that. I was basically put on a guilt trip saying that I was putting them in an unfair position, that they didn't want to take responsibility for it, that kind of thing. It was very offputting and put me into tears, especially considering the mixed message I got by two different managers, and the lack of understanding from the manager I interacted with today.

I want to say that I'm a sensitive person. Maybe too sensitive for the nature of retail. I'm also going through some personal issues (therapy is being obtained, so please do not mention that), but when I first began, I was so motivated. I loved going to work everyday, actually dreaded leaving. I loved making a difference. Now, it's the opposite. My work and personal life is not balanced. I feel like I have nobody to talk with at work about my frustrations; like nobody will really care... it's always so crazy there, that oftentimes necessary stuff are forgotten. I also feel afraid to speak up due to being retaliated against.

I know the complaints I have above are mostly part of working retail. You may be thinking 'hey, welcome to the real world... be happy you have a job!' I feel too old for this kind of job (I'm in my later 20's). I want a stable, possibly federal job, and I've been job-searching. However, I feel guilty and unsure about resigning for the following reasons:

a) I don't want my family or friends to disapprove of me leaving my job.
b) I don't want to disappoint myself by 'giving up', especially so early. (Turnover in my job is often 1-2 years)
c) I was incredibly blessed to find this admittedly competitive job. In this economy, I should be fortunate to "shut my mouth" and just be happy to have a job.
d) Maybe it's too early to say? Maybe things will improve? Maybe not?

I'm a bit embarrassed because it's only been a few months and I'm already ready to resign. I see my co-workers and they all seem fine; they don't seem to let managers or fellow co-workers/customers upset them, and they seem happy.

On the other hand, I need to think of myself, too, and what I want. The trouble is, I'm completely lost, and I was considering this job a good 'step in the door' - now I'm not even sure I can really survive the next few months or even weeks anymore. I need this job for financial and growth/expansion reasons, however, so I'm really unsure what to do. It was already hard enough to find a job.

I know this was long, and I had to parse my thoughts a lot. I'm keeping this anonymous for obvious reasons.

Thanks for any thoughts or advice for this retail jockey. Any help would be really appreciated... I'm afraid I'm in over my head.

Working from Home

rougy — Fri, 07 Sep 2012 12:11:38 -0800

Are there any other people here who work from home? Care to share some anecdotes or tell us about any rituals you use to keep you motivated? I love working from home, but it gets a little dull. On the one hand, it's great not having to leave the house, especially when it's snowing or raining and the roads are a mess.

On the other hand, being cooped up in the same place all day long for days on end sometimes gives me a case of cabin fever.

And then there is always the one, big, ever constant, evil distraction: television.

I just wanted to hear from other home-workers, especially the ones who have raised their home-employment situation to an art form.

Thanks. :)

How do I explain a degree that took ten years to earn?

sely — Wed, 04 Jul 2012 12:49:36 -0800

I am about to graduate college ten years after I started and would love some suggestions on how to approach this topic in a job interview? I entered a top 50 four-year university eleven years ago and received stellar grades my freshman year. During my sophomore year I became extremely depressed and began a cycle of alternating 4.0 GPA semesters with semesters where I either withdrew all together or earned a combination of Cs, Ds, and Fs. During my fourth year I was on track to graduate in Spring but was faced with another bout of severe anxiety and depression that caused me to end up in a hospital for a few days. My Professors all offered to help me with make up tests, etc. but I was in such a deep amount of despair that I applied for yet another medical withdrawal to prevent my transcript from having a Semester full of Fs.

I was four classes short of graduating and frustrated with the amount of time I was taking to earn a degree.. I decided to leave the University and applied for jobs in in a large city thousands of miles from where I was living. The resumes I handed to potential employers stated that I had graduated and I ended up working for three large companies in a six year period. To this day, I still can't believe that it was not discovered that I was lying but am extremely thankful I was spared the embarrassment that would have followed had the truth come out.

Towards the end of my sixth year in the city, I decided that I'd had enough of the industry and city I was in and decided to use my small amount of savings to take an extended trip to Europe. I figured this would also be the perfect opportunity to take the remaining classes and graduate. I am happy to say that I after a few months back in school I just finished the last of my classes and will be graduating in a month.

How should I go about approaching this situation with potential employers when I begin applying for jobs again? I know that I will not have to lie about having a degree anymore but certainly don't want to put that I graduated in 2012 when I was claiming I had graduated in 2006 all this time. Is it all right to not put a date at all? If they ask me point blank when I graduated, I will of course say 2012 but am also not sure how to explain why I graduated years after I began my formal career. All of the jobs I have my resume require 4-year degrees so I'm guessing it'll look odd to have graduated six years after I started working. I'd appreciate any input you all have regarding this situation.

The Working Class Goes To Heaven

Frowner — Tue, 01 May 2012 07:33:38 -0800

Happy May 1, everyone! Movie questions - I'm putting together a film series showing radical comedy about being working class/pink collar/lower-middle-class, mostly drawn from the sixties, seventies and early eighties. Or at least I hope I am - this was inspired by realizing how great 9 to 5 is and a vague memory of seeing reruns of other movies with a similar sensibility on the late show in the late eighties and early nineties. It seems like in the seventies there was this film/TV moment where it was possible to tell stories from a radical working class standpoint (even Hill Street Blues, although it's about cops, is basically about cops-as-working-people, instead of cops-as-American-Heroes-With-Power). I was pretty young when I watched all this stuff, but I remember stories that emphasized how regular working people lived in terms of housing, clothes and appearance and that took a seriously critical position about work - not films where the hero is rewarded by climbing out of the working class, or where the hero is against the other working people, who are depicted as bad and lazy.

So anyway, 9 to 5 is ideal - it's hiLARious, it has Dolly Parton, it's feminist and it talks about how regular working women/people experienced work. (Also, it isn't built around a romance.)

So what else is out there?*

Second question - there's this sixties British satirical comedy about a noble who becomes convinced that he's Jesus and falls in with a bunch of hippies. It sounds great, but I've only read about it on the internet and cannot remember what it is called. Anyone?

*Not creepily sexist or having homophobia as a major plot point; points for films that center people of color; plot should center around work or being working class. Also, Office Space and Clerks are not what I want to show - they aren't thoughtful in the way that 9 to 5is, somehow, and they don't have strong women characters.

Help me find the right workout system for loosing weight

snow_mac — Sat, 07 Apr 2012 23:55:16 -0800

I'm 22, 6'3" and about 270 lbs. I have been steadily gaining weight over college (which I'm starting my senior year next semester) and really haven't had much time to devote to fitness and weight loss. I know diet & exercise are key. I want to drop down to at most 250 in weight. I've started to have lots of back pain, mostly I think due to being overweight. What's the best system for fitness and weight loss given these requirements?

Fitness:
-Needs to be something I can do at home
-Needs to work all major muscle groups (arms, legs, butt, back etc..)
-Can fit into an hour or less

Weight Loss Diet:
-Affordable (I'm in college)
-Cannot eat (due to allergies): All fish and nuts
-Gluten-Free friendly
-Lots of healthy snack options

More then anything I don't need/want a beach body, I don't need the abs (I'm engaged to someone who doesn't care), more then anything I just need to find a healthy life style.

I've looked at P90 for the moment, P90x seems a bit extreme currently. Any advice on what I'm looking for?

Yoga, Cardio, and Weights, Oh My

bearette — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 20:32:24 -0800

Cardio? Yoga? strength-training? Help set me straight. I have some questions about exercise. Currently I enjoy high-intensity aerobics, like Zumba/BodyJam/BodyCombat classes. I also started adding yoga to this, which I love. At this point I exercise about 6 times a week and am seeing results in the form of feeling and looking better. But I have some specific questions:

1. What counts as "strength training"? In my aerobic workouts I use my muscles a lot and my legs are much more toned than before; is that considered strength training (because my muscles are getting bigger/more toned...)? Is yoga considered strength training (what with supporting your body weight and what not)? Or do I specifically have to be lifting weights for it to be considered "strength training"? If so, what additional benefits would lifting weights give me? It sounds kind of boring to be honest.

2. Is there a minimum amount of cardio I am supposed to be getting per week? Which is "better", yoga or cardio? (by "better", I guess I mean better for overall fitness) Currently I do yoga 2x per week and cardio on the other days. Will there be a difference if I do yoga more or cardio less? (i.e. replace one with the other, not lessen the days I am working out.

I have read a lot of stuff about different kinds of exercise, recommendations, etc, and it seems contradictory at times. if it helps my goals include maintaining my weight.

Thank you!

Accept a job or treat depression?

primate moon — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 16:22:01 -0800

May be about to be offered a temp-to-perm job, but also may need to start 6 to 8 week voluntary medical process that will preclude working. What do I do? I have not worked in a permanent job since spring 2008, though I have been looking hard. I've been doing temp work (accounts payable) for the last 4 years, with lots of unemployed periods between temp assignments when I can't find any work at all. The last period of unemployment was 5 months long, which I cannot afford to happen again.

Meanwhile, I have suffered from moderate to severe depression since I was 15 years old (I am now almost 52). Also, since I was 18 I have also seen therapists off and on (mostly on) and taken different antidepressants which have not been effective. Almost 2 years ago I underwent a series of ECT (electroconvulsive therapy--"shock therapy") which was successful: my depression went into remission for just over a year. Even though I had many, many severe difficulties in my life during that period, I was able to cope easily and stay optimistic. Last summer I noticed that I was slipping back into depression, and I am now feeling its full effects. This is very common with ECT, and most people need to have "maintenance" ECT sessions or repeat it. It generally consists of 3 treatments a week for 6 to 8 weeks. This basically makes work impossible. It's possible and easy to work the 2 non-ECT days each week, but there aren't many jobs that can accommodate this.

In the meantime, I was contacted about a possible temp-to-perm position at an organization where I recently worked for just under 4 weeks, covering a vacation. I was told that they may be interested in having me come back, but it would be to fill a newly created position, rather than a vacation or maternity leave, and it could very well end up being a permanent job. They already know me and my work and think well of me.

I really hated the ECT (hard to explain why; no pain, everyone's really nice, no overt negative side effects. My head tells me there's no reason to resist, but I feel like my inner core, my body at a cellular level, is screaming "NO! Don't do it!"), but it's been the only effective treatment. I feel that I have a responsibility to my family (I have 2 teenage children) and myself to receive the treatments again. So recently I have been trying to psych myself up to look into it, especially that I am once again unemployed and would have the time. I have a consultation scheduled for early next week to discuss the possibility of ECT treatment.

I expect to hear more details about the job tomorrow, and I don't know how to respond. I don't feel that I can ask them to let me start in 6 to 8 weeks in order to accommodate the ECT treatments. And, of course, I'd never tell them what the details were; I guess I would just tell them it was a medical issue and not offer details; but then they might think it's rehab or something!

From my very extensive experience temping, most clients want a temp to start as soon as they have identified their need for one and don't want to or can't put it off for another 2 months. I think that they would almost certainly say I wasn't the right person for the job. But if I don't take or get this job, there's no way to tell when the next job will come around--it could be another half year or longer! And we need the money! But, then again, if I don't do the ECT my quality of life will suffer, my kids will suffer, and I know I won't work as well as I am capable of. Very often in the past I have had days where I was simply unable to get out of bed to go to work; I have ended up calling in sick and have actually lost a few temp jobs because of this. I have not done well at work for the last several years; I'm not sure exactly why. In addition to my problems with missing work, I feel like I might put out some kind of depressed and desperate vibe that puts people off. None of the places that have fired me or chosen not to go from temp to perm has given any feedback at all, no matter how much I ask. But I don't know; this could be my depression and low self-esteem talking. Anyway, to find a potential employer that already knows and likes me and my work feels like something I absolutely cannot afford to throw away.

But, having a job greatly reduces my stress and anxiety, and I am more able to cope with daily life.

If they do want me back, should I tell them I can't start for about 2 months, and throw away an opportunity with the rare situation where they actually want me? If so, how should I explain it? Or should I just say I'm not available and take a break from the job search (and risk a long, long period of unemployment) and do the ECT? Or are there other possibilities that I'm not seeing? Thanks, all.

At a loss for a job!

PeppahCat — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 17:23:14 -0800

Need a Job Filter: Need help with recommendations for some jobs I can look into soon, with the degree(s) I have, and the work experience I have. Some fun and snowflakey details await you! HALP MEH MetaFilter hive mind!! I've been looking through jobs in the classifieds of our local papers, on Craigslist, etc. and have had NO luck finding anything I want to get into. I am not sure what kinds of jobs/what places I could apply for/at that aren't typically listed in classifieds and the like, or if there are even such jobs around me. Some snowflake details and other useful info about myself:

-I'm in my late 20s, female, in relatively great health, and while I don't love being sweaty, I'm not opposed to physical labor. Though I can't lift all that much, 50-60 pounds max. (Yeah, I'm a weenie.)
-I have an associate of science degree from a local community college and my bachelor's of psychology from the University of Tennessee. (FWIW, I am 3 credit hours away from getting my minor in anthropology, which I would like to do but [financially] was not able when I was still in school.) I have ridiculous student debts right now which are becoming almost impossible to pay monthly because the minimum payment is still close to $200. I've looked into deferment for them, but interest rates would cause more problems down the road.
-I have a car, reliable transportation if said car malfunctions, and no criminal record or anything that would be an issue for a background check.
-My job experiences are all related to serving/waiting tables. Hooters (most fun job I've ever had!), a local marina restaurant (very casual atmosphere, but serving a lot of upper middle class and high class folks), a local upscale restaurant (which was technically a BBQ place but known for more upscale service, basically the total opposite of Hooters) and working the skyboxes for the UT football games (my floor was the 'big name people' floor with the president/chancellor/athletic director/other coaches/copious amounts of insanely rich people who donated to the university...another VERY fun but also very physically demanding job.) I'm so sick of it (after 6 years plus) and am desperately wanting a job not in the restaurant industry.
-I have some unresolved issues with chronic headaches that I'm literally unable to afford to get investigated or fixed (my insurance benefit rider will not cover headache/migraine treatments). These are somewhat treated by medicine which I CAN get and afford, but might still be an issue at any job. (Preferably don't want to take the temporary disability route but am thinking I might have to in order to afford the few different medicines I take, or any other treatments.)
-My passions are both abnormal and social psychology, and anything law enforcement/criminal related. My father has been a deputy for years and I have looked into working through our local law branches, but I'm not interested in dispatch (I don't think I could handle things quite well enough, having sat in on many days of work in local dispatch) or patrol work (mostly the 'danger' factor, which is more my fiance's concern than mine...but understandable none the less). But I've been around law enforcement my whole life, it's very interesting to me and I know quite a bit about it for someone not directly involved. The psychology part...both social and abnormal are fascinating to me. A close relative of mine passed with mental issues that were still undiagnosed and he was the reason I was hugely passionate about abnormal psych to begin with. When taking classes, the social psych sort of integrated into my interests.
-I love writing (as is obvious LOL) and reading, I'm a slight grammar Nazi, I love people and talking to people, and I don't think I could abide sitting at a desk and doing nothing else every day. I really need the option to be moving or be up-and-down a little bit. I'm fairly computer-literate on a Mac, and could still deal well on a Windows based PC if needed.

TL;DR - WTF kind of jobs can I get RIGHT NOW, what kind of jobs would I be able to work that (would possibly/probably) help pay for additional schooling, should I just bypass working for now and go back to school for my masters? Or what other options are there? My fiance has by no means a HUGE income, but can afford to keep us both afloat for the time being.

I love you people for reading this and giving any insight you can. Email me at peppahcat@gmail.com of you'd like any additional info (I promise I'll be as concise as possible!) or if you've got any other questions. THANK YOU!!!

Please help me deal with a flaky business co-founder.

heartofglass — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 03:24:15 -0800

Please help me deal with a flaky business co-founder. Details inside. I am starting a business and have invited someone to be a co-founder - this person, whom I met about a year ago after several online interactions, has skills that are complementary to mine that would be quite valuable to this new venture. We discussed the idea and she was very excited about it and I was also thrilled about her coming on board.

My concerns come from the following: first, she has had business partnerships that did not succeed, apparently because she was the only one doing the work and her fellow partners did not agree with her supposed perfectionist nature. Second, she has posed a list of potential challenges about our/my venture (which relies heavily on the collaboration of a network of people). Third, she has some other projects going on, which are doing very well.

We have met last Wednesday to discuss next steps and she wants to continue doing proofs of concept to confirm that the business is worth pursuing, which is mostly fine by me, but we agreed to do a few things, and it is Monday and she hasn't done her bit yet - probably because she is busy with her other projects. Perhaps is worth mentioning that her projects and our/my idea have a lot of synergies - basically all these things could work on the same platform.

While I am ready to put a lot of time and energy into this venture *right now*, she seems to be stalling it by proposing to do X to get to Y but not really doing her bit. The idea is mine, she seemed to be keen to get on board at first, but she takes so long to actually act on things...and I am starting to get the idea that she is not all that passionate about the project.

I feel a bit like a teenager waiting to get a phone call from a would-be boyfriend, which is rather stupid when I have plenty to get on with. Am I getting a bit anal about this or is it time to jump ship before I waste my time trying to work with this person? In case of the latter, how do I go about telling her what I mentioned above in a nice way without coming across as a patronizing bitch?

Butcher, Baker, Candlestick Maker: Tell Me More About Someone's Work

jeanmari — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 09:59:51 -0800

More non-fiction please! As a strange antidote to having to read a lot of dry academic articles, I enjoy pleasurable non-fiction writing about jobs and work. Books I've liked in the past include May Roach (Stiff); Atul Gawande (Complications, Better); Barbara Ehrenreich (Nickeled and Dimed); and Tracy Kidder (House, Among Schoolchildren). I'd like recommendations for more non-fiction along those lines. Although I love Studs Terkel, books like Working are not contemporary enough for me and have a bit more of a biographical slant to them versus a study of a job, its tasks, and common problems. I also appreciate a book that looks closely at one work context (as Gawande does with healthcare) or work related to a certain theme (like Roach using Stiff to explore different jobs related to handling the dead, or Kidder using House to explore the different jobs and interactions involved in designing and building a house).

Bartending, basketweaving, road paving, dairy farming...I don't much care about the KIND of work. But I do enjoy a well researched, well told story about types of work.

What say you, hive mind?

Does checking a BlackBerry count as working?

Anonymous — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 13:10:09 -0800

Will US Immigration get upset if I take my BlackBerry with me to the US on vacation? I'm about to visit the US soon, on vacation. I would ordinarily take my BlackBerry on vacation with me, in order to check work messages once or twice a day and make sure that there are no emergencies. Can I do so without raising issues of "working" in the US?

I remember that when I was a child, the people at the immigration counter always asked my father if he had any work papers with him when we went to the US on holiday, and said that doing work in the US was strictly prohibited. Now that BlackBerries are ubiquitous, has anything changed or do I need to leave it at home?

Mean girls

pH Indicating Socks — Sun, 28 Aug 2011 18:27:07 -0800

How did you, as a young woman, learn to deal with "mean girls" at work? So my 18-year-old daughter called me crying and asked me to pick her up from work. She is a hostess, at a semi-upscale chain restaurant, and this is her first real job. When I got there, she was just absolutely in pieces -- which I never see, from her.

She tells me about a confrontation she had with some other hostess, who sent her and a party of six to the wrong table, then blamed my daughter for it, then publicly derided her in front of a gaggle of waitstaff. My daughter asks Heather to just talk to her, so they can work this out, and (of course) Heather mocks her to her face, and tells her there is nothing *to* work out. Later, a manager sees her, and asks if there is anything wrong and my daughter tries to say, no, no, I'm fine, but the manager drags out of her what happened. Now my daughter is horrified at having been a tattle-tale, and convinced that if Heather didn't have cause to hate her before, she does now. And explodes in a crying frenzy. The manager suggests, not unkindly, that maybe she should take off the rest of the shift, which she does. It is not lost on her that this has now cost her money, money she needs, and that Heather can tell her own story for the rest of the day.

I'm hearing this, and feeling for her so much, because the bitches and their ways used to make me cry too, when I was an 18-year-old hostess -- but I don't know what to say. The bitches still exist, damn them, even in the professional jobs I have now, but they don't make me cry anymore -- but I don't know how that happened, or how to help her get there. I don't even know how I do handle them, other than to keep out of their way as much as I can, I guess. I'm sorry there are bitches, sweetie. They really should all be killed was all I could find to say, but it is not very much to the purpose.

And sorry about the incendiary language -- Men have ways of being horrible, too, certainly, but the thing my daughter experienced is, I think, a strictly girl-on-girl kind of combat. And I know Heather is only a young woman, too, and still learning, and probably deserving of some kind of compassion if bullying my daughter is how she needs to get by. I just --

How did you, as a young woman, learn to deal with "mean girls" at work?
Do you still struggle with this kind of stuff at work? How do you deal?
What should my daughter do? It may be a crap job, but she needs this job. How does she handle having cried and flipped out over what must seem -- what *was* -- a completely minor incident?
What can I say, what could someone have said to you, to make you feel better?

Movin to Amrika

Anonymous — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 15:26:17 -0800

I’m British, my wife’s American. We’re planning on moving to the States next year. Aside from the bureaucracy and deciding exactly where we’re going I’ve been thinking about my employability and wondering if there’s anything I could or should be doing over the next twelve months to make myself more attractive to American employers. Some things that may or may not be relevant;

I’m 28 years old and I have an MSc in International Relations from a pretty good school.
Since leaving university I’ve been working as a prospect researcher at a few different charities ranging in size from citywide to national and across the educational, cultural and social welfare sectors.
I have a fair amount of experience of working in an office environment, specific and detailed experience of working in the non-profit sector and a background in retail and bar work from pre-graduation days.
I know MS Office and other standard office software and I’m pretty experienced working with relational databases and other prospect research specific resources and systems. (I also have some incredibly basic experience working with html and sql querying which I’m almost loathe to mention because it really is very, very basic)
I’m not dedicated to staying in prospect research or the charitable sector, in fact I’d like to do something different. Ideally I’d like to make a living doing something creative, writing or photography, but I’m also aware of my own limitations and that might be a longer term aspiration or remain something I do in the time I’m not working to pay the bills.
I’m also not above delivering pizzas or pouring coffee for a while
I’m pretty smart (or at least able to give that impression), inquisitive and quick to learn but also very easily bored and prone to laziness.
I’m tall and have a history of terrible haircuts.

So my question is whether you can think of anything I could be doing in in the time I have before we move that will improve my employability stateside?

I’m thinking about qualifications, experience or just things I could be reading to learn about the job market and working in America generally

Anonymous because I'm slightly paranoid about having this much personal information linked to my username. If for some reason you want to you can get a hold of me at prospectresearchguy@gmail.com
Thanking you.

Political ad/video with kids working adult jobs

ac — Tue, 26 Jul 2011 07:48:01 -0800

What was that political video / TV ad that showed a montage of small children working a series of adult jobs (in a factory, for example)? It would have been within the last five years or so; it may have been about the U.S. federal debt / deficit, and may have been an election ad, although I'm not sure. The point was that we are placing the burden of current decisions on future generations. Thank you in advance, great hive-mind!

This Woman's Work

Anonymous — Tue, 17 May 2011 08:42:44 -0800

Please help me evaluate a possible career move while pregnant with child #2. I've been in my current job for three years in the nonprofit sector. Due to financial constraints and general lack of enthusiasm at the institution, there have been no raises, no promotions, and no cost of living increases. There are elements of the job that I like, many others that I don't and I've been conflicted about the environment for quite sometime.

A new position has been posted internally. I'm somewhat interested and have been invited to apply by the manager. It would be a title and salary promotion, along with more responsibility but hours may be about what I'm putting in now (50 week, + evening/weekend). Of course, nothing is this simple:

1) Have a young child under 2, expecting #2 later this year. With #1, severe post-postpartum depression and anxiety at work following return. This has subsided but only recently. It was HARD coming back and I'm concerned this would happen again and hurt my performance. With two young children, how do professional women manage to stay career-minded while remaining present for kids?

2) Also, if I take the risk and get the job but decide it isn't right for me in a year, quitting means jeopardizing my childcare situation (that I LOVE) which is tied to the organization.

3) Because this is an internal move, I must declare my application to my supervisor. This will make my present position tenuous for many reasons, and if I don't get the job, I risk being perceived as someone who isn't committed to the position.

4) The new manager does not yet know I'm expecting, how/when/do I broach this in good faith?

5) If I ultimately decide that now isn't the time to make a move due to family concerns, how do I keep the door open with this manager who was interested in my application?

Apologies for how long and convoluted this is--this decision is fraught with all kinds of anxiety and conflict about wanting to be an accomplished, professional woman, yet remaining close to and available for my babies.

Preventing Bulky Arms

AngryLlama — Thu, 28 Apr 2011 08:03:00 -0800

Workout Question - A few years ago I went away from my cardio-only gym routine and added in weight lifting. I did chest press, lat pull downs, shoulder press, etc. I'm a girl, btw. I lost a little weight but now my arms are bulky, not super muscly but just bulkier and sometimes they don't fit in my shirts. I enjoy lifting weights but I feel conflicted about it if my arms are going to continue to get bigger and bigger. My question is - how do I continue to lift weights without my arms getting bulkier and bulkier? I would like to also make my arms less bulky if possible.. Are push-ups a good option?