I'm caught up in the gossip, but not the main character of the story. Should I go out of my way to tell my coworkers that I also deplore my "friend's" actions?
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posted by abirdinthehand
on Feb 2, 2013 -
7 answers
Would becoming a project manager be an opportunity for growth, or an exercise in frustration?
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posted by freya_lamb
on Feb 2, 2013 -
5 answers
I just started a new job as a researcher. They hired a few people around the same time as me and we all have start dates around now-ish. I've been there a week. There is a new guy starting in my department in a more senior position than me, but not supervising me, on Monday. I just got his name today and looked him up, and... there are some things about him that a little bit of digging uncovered that are sketchy. (It's definitely him, please give me the benefit of the doubt here.) His job is not likely to be impacted by these revelations about his recent past, but if it were to get out that his history includes these things, it could endanger my company's reputation if a competitor or journalist found out. Nothing he did is illegal.
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 1, 2013 -
18 answers
In my day to day life, I often have to deal with people who, instead of asking questions, make assumptions aloud at you about what you're going to be doing despite the fact that these assumptions may not be accurate. A lot of the time these techniques are used along with someone pretending to be so hopelessly helpless that they could not possibly take care of their own workplace problems.
Basically, it's a technique used by weasels.
For example:
"I know you're going to be very helpful during this process because..." or "I don't know x from z so it's a good thing you are here to handle that part"
They will also make assumptions about what you would and would not do. "I know you wouldn't want x or z to happen because..."
These things are usually in no way true. In fact, the weasel in question often knows they're not true, they're just testing boundaries.
So my question is generally, how does one push back against these behaviors without being rude, jarring and literal? Especially if you're dealing with a weasel -- they're better at this than you. I tend to shut down in the presence of weaselry, giving them very little the work with, but this doesn't seem like the best solution.
posted by Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night
on Feb 1, 2013 -
19 answers
I have a job interview next Friday. Yay! But I have questions about what is a setting-appropriate choice.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 31, 2013 -
11 answers
I hope this will be my
last job-related question for quite a while. I want to give two weeks' notice today or tomorrow at
this job and I'm not sure how to go about it.
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posted by trillian
on Jan 31, 2013 -
7 answers
I'm not her assistant but she's treating me like I am. Frankly I'm ready to just quit but I can't afford it without another job lined up. To rub salt in that wound, she's micromanaging and professionally lazy and generally gets under my skin... Help me stick it out while I look for another job!
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 30, 2013 -
14 answers
Should I get a standing desk? Please share your pros and cons, and any tips!
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posted by Miko
on Jan 30, 2013 -
27 answers
My weekend is overbooked to the tune of family vs. work. Help me figure out how to tell my very difficult boss about this the right way.
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posted by chatelaine
on Jan 29, 2013 -
12 answers
Recently in a social situation I was asked my thoughts on a budgeting item and I gave it along with a solution that I had given thought to and was planning on presenting to the budget chair. (We work in different departments but run things past each other on occasion). One of the people at the gathering was a woman with political ambitions for our small town. A few days later she wrote a letter to the editor that gave my exact idea. What would you do? On the plus side it was very well received, OTH it was mine. I realize I should have said nothing and it was my mistake. I figure people that were there would know it wasn't hers and hopefully someone will point that out. Can I address it or should I leave it?
posted by lasamana
on Jan 28, 2013 -
12 answers
Finding it hard to trust a colleague who I know has told lies and who I’m worried is trying to undermine me.
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posted by Flowerpower
on Jan 26, 2013 -
25 answers
I am going to be present at a meeting in which a group of us will be asked to make a decision based on a document with misleading information in it. I would like some advice on how to present the correct version of events without being insubordinate or seeming to call my higher-ups liars.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 25, 2013 -
19 answers
I'm wondering, after breakfast, and a shower, and a commute, and coffee - what is next?
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posted by Lownotes
on Jan 24, 2013 -
23 answers
Hey all. Posting my questions to this community has been very helpful. I'm thankful so far for the advice I've been getting.
This question has to do with something I've been struggling with my whole adulthood. I was diagnosed with clinical depression in my teens, and since then it's really limited a lot of what I can do. It didn't help much that I married a very overbearing person when I was 19 who basically took over my life for me. I left him two years ago and I've been recovering from my depression thanks to medication and a lot of self help techniques. I've started exercising and eating right, and I've lost weight, which I'm happy about. My next goal is to become self sufficient. My work ethic needs help though because I have a lot of trouble getting things done. I believe it stems from all those years I spent in deep depression and not being able to take care of myself. I procrastinate out of being overwhelmed and fearful of outcomes. I wouldn't call it laziness. It's just tough for me to learn a new way of living. Any advice on how to deal with this and improve my work ethic? I believe it's due time I start getting out of my own way.
Thank you MeFi community. :)
posted by Cybria
on Jan 24, 2013 -
12 answers
I'm a web designer/developer. I've been self taught my whole life, but now that I'm getting higher up in my career and more people interested in me as upper level management experience. I dropped out of college and taught myself everything I know. Now, though, I'm wondering if I need to go back to school for a degree to progress any higher.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 24, 2013 -
13 answers
I've worked professionally for over 15 years, and in all the that time, I've never been on time to work consistently. How do I show up to work around 9 o'clock like a normal person?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 24, 2013 -
62 answers
In my organization, we're not great at job titles. Mostly they aren't really needed. But for what I do it would be helpful, when contacting people both within and without the organization, to have a title to use that both speaks to what I do and gives folks an idea that I'm someone who is authorized to [get information/make changes to accounts and procedures/make decisions/spend money/whatever].
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posted by attercoppe
on Jan 23, 2013 -
8 answers
I work alone, in an office isolated from other people with zero opportunity for social interaction. I could, if I wanted to, arrive at 8.30am, stare at a screen til 12.30pm, break from 12.30pm-1.30pm, then stare at a screen from 1.30-5.15pm.In silence. Alone. I really, really don’t want to. Help me come up with things I can do every hour to ‘break’ for a few minutes before getting back into the next hour-long block of work.
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posted by t0astie
on Jan 23, 2013 -
21 answers
How can I better "manage my managers" who can only think in the long-term? They have lots of really great ideas which never go anywhere because they don't schedule people to work on them.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 22, 2013 -
3 answers
I will be traveling to a remote location to interview key informants for a research project. I am looking for a convenient interface which to enter the data.
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posted by powerbumpkin
on Jan 22, 2013 -
5 answers
I have a pretty decent job but don't enjoy it and have started underperforming - how can I motivate myself to work harder again?
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posted by sock of ages
on Jan 20, 2013 -
13 answers
I'm just finished a research masters, and I have been doing freelance work in my field throughout that to pay the bills. My plan was to go looking for temp work next week, but I'd love some advice on how you've balanced getting temp or other jobs when your other work needs occasional daytime availability.
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posted by carbide
on Jan 20, 2013 -
6 answers
I'll try to make this brief. I recently turned 23, and due to a combination of drugs and depression since getting out of high school I have essentially no work experience. This makes responding to job postings very frustrating and humiliating as my resume feels like a complete joke.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 18, 2013 -
16 answers
Have you convinced your corporate overlords to let you transition from a full-time employee to an independent contractor? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TELL ME HOW YOU DID IT.
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posted by julthumbscrew
on Jan 17, 2013 -
10 answers
Help! I’m having trouble adjusting to college and accepting myself, and it’s stressing me out. What can I do to fix this? Lots of details inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 16, 2013 -
14 answers
I made an honest error at work, and people are upset (or more) at me. How do I balance taking responsibility and standing up for myself?
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posted by ribboncake
on Jan 16, 2013 -
48 answers
I woke up this morning to find a letter on the door of the room I'd been staying in, reading: "Your time is up. I want you out of my house. No matter how you take this, I want you out of my house. I don't care who you have to call, but you must be out by today. Your stuff is already outside in the living room." She was the one who let me in after
this situation occurred. I have work at 4, she will be there, and all I want to do is scream and call out sick.
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posted by Ashen
on Jan 16, 2013 -
97 answers
I feel that my current job threatens my personal safety. How can I leave this job as professionally as possible while protecting that safety?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 16, 2013 -
17 answers
I do not like working out for the sake of working out. But I do love working hard and vigorously if it means I am being productive and getting something done. Can you help me come up with ideas of working hard and having a tangible result at the end?
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posted by Sassyfras
on Jan 15, 2013 -
18 answers
I feel like I have become completely unwilling to work for people if I don't think highly of them, and I can't decide whether I have justifiably high standards or am being unreasonable.
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posted by eseuss
on Jan 14, 2013 -
10 answers
I've lived in just one city for most of my adult life. I know a lot of people who've spent their large parts of their adult lives working and living in many different cities. Those of you who've done this, how did you go about doing it? How did it work out for you?
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posted by Ziggy500
on Jan 14, 2013 -
8 answers
How do I search for a job in Toronto that fits my special snowflake(but relatively modest[I hope]) requirements?
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posted by Gin and Comics
on Jan 11, 2013 -
6 answers
I'm 23, and I've had an objectively great programming job for six months. Part of me wants to quit and become a barista or something. Am I crazy?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 11, 2013 -
57 answers
Hi people with ALT experience, finding work in Japan sure is tough. Finding work with your girlfriend? Much harder.
Where should a pair of people go to teach English in Japan? We are spending our time trying to get anywhere we can (We hear being near a city increases our happiness), however, we have been rooting for a position in Nagoya, Kanagawa as a close second. We keep hitting dead ends and are getting desperate. It looks like at this rate, we are going to save up $2,000 a piece and take a plane there in mid-april, 3 months from now, hopefully finding work in the 90 days we are legally allowed there.
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posted by Nighthawk3729
on Jan 10, 2013 -
23 answers
I want to set up an activity for some people I work with. There will be about 15-20 of us and basically I want it to be like speed dating only in this case, every person talks to every other person in the room for a set period of time. How would I set this up around a large conference table to make it easy for everyone to know where to go from person to person?
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posted by otherwordlyglow
on Jan 10, 2013 -
9 answers
I am applying for an internship and I want to ask someone to give me a reference. However, I haven't been in contact with them for two years. We parted on good terms. Is it acceptable for me to ask them for a reference still?
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posted by cyml
on Jan 10, 2013 -
14 answers
I'm looking for full-time work that's more or less within standard business hours. The problem is that I see my therapist weekly and my psychiatrist monthly. I could decrease the therapy sessions, but i'd still be missing work regularly. How do I bring this up with potential employers, and at what point in the proceedings? Or should I refrain from mentioning it? I'm in toronto if that's relevant. My doctors are only available in regular business hours.
posted by windykites
on Jan 9, 2013 -
16 answers
I need to know how much to charge a non-profit organization to set up and maintain a DB, having never done it before....and I need to give an amount before
tonight! :-/
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posted by la petite marie
on Jan 9, 2013 -
7 answers
I just accepted my first real job offer! I'm excited, but kind of freaking out about adjusting to a traditional working lifestyle.
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posted by circumspice
on Jan 8, 2013 -
49 answers
I work in communications and would like to start a blog that I could link to from Twitter and LinkedIn. But I'd also like to write about my personal life. How do I thread this needle?
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posted by kat518
on Jan 8, 2013 -
8 answers
Recently I have noticed some unsolicited endorsements appear in my LinkedIn. I do not think they are detailed written out recommendations, rather something like "Jim has endorsed seesom for [Skill or Industry]". I do not think they appear on my profile yet since I have not "approved" them.
What is the ettiquette for these? Have they helped you at all? Should I return the favor for those who have endorsed me if I can genuinely recommend their work? At first glance, they don't appear to be very useful since it seems like it doesn't take much to endorse someone, but I would like to take advantage of LinkedIn to help keep in touch with people. Any experiences you have had would be helpful.
posted by seesom
on Jan 7, 2013 -
15 answers
I'm being forced to answer phones at work. I have NO clue and NO ability how to do this and I have to start NOW. How do I make this situation less horrible?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 7, 2013 -
26 answers
