I'd like to learn a little bit more about what couples counselors, therapists, and psychologists have written about the stages that long-term relationships go through, what the issues and concerns are in the different stages, and what approaches are helpful in keeping the relationship strong at different stages. The articles I've been able to find on the web are pretty shallow, and seem to assume that the purpose of marriage is to have kids. I'd like to find something that is more appropriate to a couple who got married at 40+ so have already attained (presumably) a certain degree of wisdom, and for whom kids are not in the picture or in the cards. Authors that I have found helpful and intelligent in the past have been Gottman, Sue Johnson (Hold Me Tight), and the author of perennial AskMe favorite The Five Love Languages. I'm specifically interested in the 5-10 year stage, but welcome broader surveys as well.
posted by matildaben
on Jan 29, 2014 -
I had a wisdom tooth extracted yesterday, surgically with IV sedation. I was very very nervous, but it went fine, and today the pain is under easy control from paracetamol.
However, I feel not just completely drained (which is, I guess, understandable given how tense I was yesterday and the small physical trauma) but unusually sad. I can't remember the procedure due to the sedation, and I feel weirdly like I'm missing a bit of time that I shouldn't be. I feel ashamed that I was so nervous beforehand. But more than that I just feel so sad about nothing I can put my finger on.
I take lofepramine for depression, which is generally pretty well under control. Would any of the drugs I might have been given yesterday counteracted it? Has anyone else experienced this?
posted by anonymous
on Nov 28, 2013 -
I'd like to convey as much wisdom/advice as possible to my kids before they become feral teenagers drenched in Axe and scorn. Please share the best lists/essays/articles you've ever seen on the theme of "Teaching Your Kids About ______". [more inside]
posted by julthumbscrew
on Oct 22, 2013 -
I'm writing a letter to a wonderful graduate of the (high school) Class of 2013 on the occasion of her jumping off into that great abyss of adulthood. I'm hoping to include wisdom from random people on the internet (that would be you) about what you would tell your self if you could go back to the day that you graduated from high school so that I can include it in my letter. Travel back in that time machine, go to that shining day of your graduation and tell me what you would tell yourself, no matter how funny, sad, bizarre, etc.
posted by Leezie
on Jun 14, 2013 -
My dentist says they should come out because they will eventually rot and worse, allow decay on my second molars. My surgeon says that while there is decay on one of the wisdom teeth, there is actually a tendency for older people to get fewer cavities. I am having trouble processing this and other information. How do I decide? What other data and information should I collect? [more inside]
posted by starkraven
on Apr 12, 2013 -
I've waited too long, I need my wisdom teeth out now. They have just started hurting. Complication, no dental insurance or really any money. Help? [more inside]
posted by Garm
on Nov 19, 2012 -
I'm 34, and currently have all my wisdom teeth, but one broke over the summer and got an infection a while back. I'm on heavy duty antibiotics now to minimize that and the extraction is scheduled for Friday morning. My regular dentist will be doing the procedure, and it sounds as though I'll just be getting a local anaesthetic. He said I wouldn't even need someone to drive me to the appointment, though I probably will, just to be on the safe side. What else should I know before going into this?
posted by peppermind
on Oct 30, 2012 -
We have a venue and put on a monthly variety show. Up until now there hasn't really been a theme, just lot's of variety. I'd like to focus one of these on Songs/Poems/brief writings that were done by people who were dying and knew it. I think Freddy Mercury did a few songs celebrating life, I know that Warren Zevon did. Anything you can give me would be appreciated. And it doesn't really have to be celebratory.
posted by kenaldo
on Aug 15, 2012 -
Several years ago, my husband's close friend died suddenly. Now the friend's oldest son is graduating from high school, and his wife asked my husband (and others) to pass on some personal accumulated wisdom and memories. What kinds of things should we address? [more inside]
posted by Madamina
on Jun 22, 2012 -
My two right wisdom teeth are infected and abscessed. I'm on 500mg of Amoxicillin three times a day. Should I wait until the infection clears before getting them extracted? [more inside]
posted by clcapps
on Apr 21, 2012 -
Have any of you flown on an airplane the day after you got a wisdom tooth removed? My oral surgeon says it'll be fine, but I'm nervous. [more inside]
posted by Viola
on Feb 16, 2012 -
Two home building questions. Firstly for those who have built, with the wisdom of hindsight, what things did you forget that you wished you had had included or for that matter extra stuff you paid for but wouldn't now. Secondly any recommendations for builders in Canberra Australia, in particular ones good at sticking to a budget. [more inside]
posted by katelizabeth
on Jan 22, 2011 -
Dad gift filter: Hive mind, what are your favorite books I can get as a gift for my father that are easy-to-digest-in-snippets kind of book? Topics such as self-help, wisdom, psychology, philosophy, biography, and creativity are all great. [more inside]
posted by parma
on Nov 29, 2010 -
What's a good atheist substitute for the Bible? I'm looking for something I can read periodically that encourages me to step back from all of the hecticness, and to think about how to lead a good life and how to be a good person. It doesn't have to be infallible, just something that helps me to think about what's important. Accumulated wisdom, explained simply, is a bonus. [more inside]
posted by surenoproblem
on Oct 17, 2010 -
What steps can I take to reduce the risk of, or prepare myself for, common disasters in life? The first time my hard drive crashed, I learned to back up my data regularly; when a friend's dad had a heart attack when I was younger, I learned how to eat healthily and exercise; it took a root canal for me to realise that brushing my teeth isn't enough. I've also learned the hard way that just because a young woman asks you out, doesn't mean that you can skip the step where you ask, "Hey, uh, you don't have a boyfriend, do you?"
I'd like to learn more of these vital lessons without having to go through the disaster part first. Have you learned things from surviving a disaster, that you can pass on? I'm most interested in things that happen to nearly everyone: having a hard drive crash, losing your parents, stuff like that, but if there are other things I should know, I'd like to hear those, too. [more inside]
posted by surenoproblem
on Oct 7, 2010 -
RelationshipFilter: Hints requested on communicating across nuances of different cultures without constantly worrying about hurt feelings, treading on eggshells and overwhelming fears and doubts. [more inside]
posted by The Lady is a designer
on May 31, 2010 -
You are not my doctor or my dentist, but what over the counter and homeopathic products are reasonably safe to use after wisdom tooth extraction? [more inside]
posted by kscottz
on May 15, 2010 -
is there a thorough list of basic life things that adults should know? (e.g. go to the dentist twice a year, get your oil changed every __ miles, send thank you notes after interviews). [more inside]
posted by k7lim
on Jul 8, 2009 -
I seem to have chipped a tiny bit of my upper-left wisdom tooth. My dental insurance also ran out a month ago. Now what?
posted by special-k
on Nov 29, 2008 -
Do wisdom teeth really need to come out, or is my dentist trying to hustle me?
My question, dear MeFites, is... do you really need to have your wisdom teeth taken out if they're not causing you any pain? [more inside]
posted by katala
on Nov 4, 2008 -
I'm getting two wisdom teeth pulled tomorrow(top and bottom on the same side) I've never had a tooth pulled. It is my tradition to drink while watching the election results. I know my dentist would recommend against this. If I *were* to drink on Tuesday, how bad would that be? Anyone have experience with the tooth extractions and the drinking? Also feel free to share your recommendations for food/after care/things I should expect
posted by Epsilon-minus semi moron
on Nov 2, 2008 -
I'm looking for a website where people post source code and then others comment on improvements.
posted by zzztimbo
on Sep 26, 2008 -
Looking for wisdom from Judaism. A while back, someone posted a link to a great essay. It was chock full of Jewish wisdom. I can't remember the context, but I want to say it had to do with success and achievement. As opposed to saying that ego-gratification and success were a bad thing, the essay instead pointed out that there was virtue in doing things for yourself and virtue in aquiring the trappings of success. Anyone want to conjure up a link for me? How about any other essays and articles filled with good Judaic wisdom?
posted by jasondigitized
on Oct 1, 2007 -
What would you want to say to a community of brand new thinkers/changers/makers? Or what advice can you give me about commencement speeches in general? [more inside]
posted by SoylentErin
on Apr 17, 2007 -
We all know about IQ - but has anybody ever tried to make a standardised test for wisdom? [more inside]
posted by rongorongo
on Nov 14, 2006 -
After having an impacted wisdom tooth removed over three weeks ago the adjacent molar seems to have relocated because it feels like it's more elevated now and I can no longer bite down completely (there's also some sensitivity). [more inside]
posted by zinegurl
on Oct 22, 2006 -
how long should i wait before smoking after i had my wisdom teeth removed? did i mention that i'm deathy afraid of dry socket? [more inside]
posted by defmute
on Oct 8, 2006 -
is it important to have your wisdom teeth removed? why? they really don't bother me at all.
posted by brandz
on Jul 30, 2006 -
I really like the essays that David Foster Wallace collects in _A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again_ and _Consider the Lobster_. Which essayists take a similar approach? [more inside]
posted by scarylarry
on Jul 28, 2006 -
So I need my wisdom teeth out, asap, and I've been quoted $1500. Can I save money by getting dental insurance? [more inside]
posted by sdis
on Apr 11, 2006 -
ToothFilter: I just had 4 wisdom teeth removed today and I have few questtions. [more inside]
posted by AMWKE
on Oct 26, 2005 -
Extracting Wisdom: I've been putting it dodging it for years, but it's looking (and feeling) like I'm going to have to get my wisdom teeth pulled. I do have insurance, but I have to go to a specific provider - a provider I've never actually been to before. Any advice on questions I should ask or things I should look for? Is one oral surgeon as good as another or should I shop around and/or pay extra if needed?
posted by aladfar
on Jun 7, 2004 -
Would I be crazy to plop down money on a 32-bit mobo & processor when 64-bit are now available? (More inside) [more inside]
posted by RavinDave
on Apr 9, 2004 -