Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with wellbeing

I have no one. He was my life.

Anonymous — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 10:42:30 -0800

My partner of 8 years is thinking of leaving me. He gave notice on our apt without telling me. I'm dying inside. I don't know what to do. I don't have any family. I haven't kept in touch with my family. I just found out because the management company asked if they could show our apt and I said we weren't moving. Then they faxed me a notice to vacate in my partner's handwriting. I called and he admitted that he'd already secured an apartment.

I think I'm dying. I don't know what to do. I don't have any family. My friends are sweet, but he's been my best friend. I don't want him to leave me. He says he's 80% sure he wants me to stay with him, but there's a part of him that's unsure he wants to be with me because he thinks we might want different things. He was speaking in this disembodied tone over the phone, completely removed. In person, yesterday, he told me I was his life. We've been having so much fun.

We jut had a wonderful weekend. We've had a number of fun and great weeks. I don't know what to do. I want to run home to my family, but I've neglected them so much because my partner was my family and my mother is crazy. I live so far away from home. I only have $10,000 in the bank and I live in the DC area. I only make $36K, so I don't even think I qualify to rent any apts.

I'm shocked, confused, at work, and I feel extremely sick now. Part of me wants to beg him to please take me with him. Part of me rationally knows he should do what he wants and I should gracefully step out of his way. I love him. Deeply. I would do anything he wanted.

He's in his late 30s and I'm in my early 30s. God, I'm so confused. My sense of well-being is fading fast. What do I do? Can someone please give me a list of steps of what I need to do? I think I'm going to be a zombie for a few months at least.

Help me deal with my evil boss.

o0dano0o — Mon, 11 Jun 2007 19:38:52 -0800

Asking for a friend: HELP! My boss is wrecking my well being and my chance of moving on. (quasi-long post) Asking for a friend...

"A few months ago I started my job working as an Aide for a State Legislator. Contrary to my initial impressions, the job is going nowhere fast and my boss turned out to be verbally and mentally abusive as well as extremely controlling – eg. All questions I ask are “stupid and so am I for asking them”, everyone finds out about my mistakes except for me, and how dare I try to take lunch while my boss is in the office?! My boss has a history of aides quitting very soon after starting, but since I’ve been able to work with difficult people before this I thought I could handle the challenge. This was a mistake.

A few weeks ago I set up a meeting with my boss to discuss our expectations of one another, how things were going, and how I could improve upon the job. Up until the meeting I had been under the impression that I was doing really well there. My boss went on a rant about how since I started “everything has been one big f*** up after another” and when I asked how I could do better all my boss could tell me was that I was to blame for everything. The meeting with my boss confirmed two things: trying to discuss the concept of being a “team” would not work and I needed to high-tail it out of there – AND soon. I have never had a boss tell me I was a “poor employee” or question my work ethic before, and I have since felt worthless and like I am a bad person. I sometimes feel that maybe I am a bad worker since it’s been so hard for me to stay focused and motivated.

I have decided that it is no longer in my best psychological interest to stay working for my boss, but have found that in applying for other positions within the Legislature that the possibility of my boss’ wrath at someone else “stealing” his/her (have to maintain anonymity here) slave is a very real deterrent toward my being hired by another Legislator (this has been openly acknowledged during at least one interview that I have had there for a position I did not get). Politics as usual, it seems. It may be a possibility that I will not be able to continue working for other Legislators because of my working for my boss. This is disappointing because I like the job itself, but because of the awful experience I have had there, I don’t think I’ll be too sad to leave.

The longer I stay, the more I’m terrified that my boss will find out I’m applying elsewhere within – even though I’ve taken every precaution to keep things secret, the walls will always have ears. I want to leave now but I know from experience that it is harder to find a job when unemployed. Prior to this job I had one year of administrative experience (I left because I relocated) and four months of admin temp-work after relocating. Before that I was working full time to put myself through college full time for two years.

And so, me-fi peoples, I ask for your assistance in a situation that is unlike any other I’ve found myself in yet. Thank you!"

Yummy yummy yummy I want vegies in my tummy

t0astie — Thu, 21 Sep 2006 03:44:49 -0800

Help me learn more about nutrition and eating for wellness and energy. I'm looking for recommendations for resources -- books especially - I can make use of along the path to healthy eatin'. For a long, long time, my eating habits have been appalling - little in the way of fruits or vegies, hardly any protein. My diet consisted primarily of toast and coffee.

I've started to make some healthy changes and I would love to read more about nutrition and eating for wellbeing.

I have been browsing all the healthy eating threads here at askme, and have had a look at lots of the recipe sites mentioned.

But I'm really interested in hearing about books and printed resources that have inspired / guided mefites to eat healthy whole foods. Cookbooks? Books about nutrition? Magazines?

Google and Amazon searches turned up *so* much that it was really hard to tell what was any good.

Can I just clarify? Keen to learn more about eating for life/energy/wellbeing. *Not* looking for: diet books - Atkins, South Beach et al - or anything with a focus on weight loss/dieting.

Always getting sick

angryjellybean — Tue, 21 Feb 2006 10:02:38 -0800

What is up with my immune system? I'm always getting sick! I only have a cold right now, it's true, but this is the third time I've had a cold so far in 2006. I've also had tonsillitis (which is recurring - I've had it 9 times in the last two years and am scheduled to have my tonsils out sometime this summer) and some mysterious bug that kept me up being sick 3 nights in a row for no apparent reason (I hadn't eaten anything strange). I also had 4 colds between September and December last year. Basically I catch whatever's going round.

I eat healthily - I eat at least 4 portions of fruit or vegetables a day but often it's more, I take vitamin supplements and go to the gym 3 or 4 times every week. I get fresh air and am moderately hygenic with regard to cooking and stuff (I'm a student, haha)... I'm starting to question my immune system, surely someone with a healthy lifestyle shouldn't get ill so easily? One thing that has occured to me is that it seems to be when I'm living the student life rather than at home with my parents... but who knows if that is relevant.

Oh p.s. I do drink alcohol, no more than twice a week (usually once) and don't smoke. If that sheds any light on anything.

Why does exercise make us feel good?

Keyser Soze — Sat, 13 Dec 2003 17:03:21 -0800

I have always wondered why I tend to feel better after a workout. What kind of chemicals get released during and after physical exertion, and why do they make us feel good?